@Jay-Marae-is-in-an-emotional-maze
Thanks 🙏
ok so yesterday I got grounded.
Grounded, you say? At sixteen? You might ask yourself.
Yeah, I did and for reasons valid, so I’m not really upset with my parents for it. It’s more like a personal vendetta I’m having with myself. So since yesterday, I’ve basically been very disappointed with myself for what I did. It was a problem with communication, and I got in trouble for it, which was honestly the stupidest part of what I did.
Essentially, I went upstairs for the night and got stuck in drawing a wonderful picture Nate sent me, until I had realized I didn’t have dinner. I don’t eat breakfast and I had only had lunch. I was hungry when I went to bed (which was later than what I usually go to bed at).
This morning I woke up feeling like actual crap. Even my voice was still tired. I made myself breakfast but didn’t eat it, and I went to school to discover that Nate was absent. Which sucks. And I didn’t get a lot of hugs (I know that’s like, really, Emi, ehat the fuck are you talking about? But I live off of hugs).
so essentially all of these tell-tale signs of depression are sinking back in, lack of hunger, with spikes of intense eating, I barely worked at all or focused today, and I just felt awful. And still do.
thanks for listening
tomorrow, hopefully, I’ll be able to see my beacon of light and I’ll feel better, but right now I’m just
I’m focusing on the small things right now. Like I have to go get my laundry in about forty minutes.
Baby-steps are important when big steps seem impossible. In fact, as long as you're moving, even if it's a crawl, you're doing great. Don't be mad at yourself for whatever happened that got you grounded. Things don't always go according to plan, and the fact that you feel bad is a good sign that you understand your mistake and will learn from it, which is the most important thing. Take a step back and think to yourself "will this thing affect me a year, or even a month from now?" If not, then there's no reason to linger on it. Otherwise, I hope you feel better overall soon, and keep working on it. <3