forum Your Personal Venting Space 3: Tokyo Drift

Started June 28, 2020 by @The-N-U-T-Cracker

tune

It's a tea and coffee club, but we're not allowed to serve food or drinks because of the pandemic so we're kind of a hangout club for now

Aww that's nice.

I'm only in one club, it's our school GSA and I'm one of the presidents with a freaking awesome senior. He won state wrestli ng and hes very openly bi and just one big teddy bear jdjakahskaka

mmmmmm
just got catcalled again

Eat. Fingers.

It's a tea and coffee club, but we're not allowed to serve food or drinks because of the pandemic so we're kind of a hangout club for now

This might be perfect for the backstory to The Orange Juice Club in my books.

i'll join! but yes, i respect your approach, let us know how it goes!

I didn't sleep last night and I haven't eaten anything today. I wanna vent but I don't want to annoy anyone

Go onto the Venting Chat then :)

me: i'm stressed out of my mind, can i have a break
my math teacher: yes but at least do some math work
me, scratching my neck aggressively: yeah sure

i thought this was the venting chat ;-;

It is, don't worry about annoying anyone here haha.

so… my friend- who i thought was my friend- said she faked our whole 3 years of friendship and then told a bunch of my friends to block me before they are trapped in a friendship with me and then there ya go only few people left are my 2 bsfs and my 2 partners

I'm pretty sure I bit the inside of my mouth while I was sleeping??? I'm almost positive I grind my teeth at night because my jaw and neck/upper back always fucking hurt which is a big sign of it

So you know I've just been knowing on the skin flap there and trying to get it off I'm having fun

tw for like suicide and sh and religious trauma uhh just heavy shit man

sorry, just gonna continue the vent because i still have stuff to say

haven't vented here in a while lol

cw: verbal harassment, enbyphobia, homophobia

Hnnnn my friend just said "what's with that dumptruck-lookin ass" and slapped my ass and I don't think they meant to make me uncomfortable, it was just a joke, but it was high-key uncomfy and even though I laughed it was just because I didn't know how to react and I'm??? Very upset by it????

that's understandable, and i'd recommend bringing it up to them. like- i understand they didn't have bad intentions, but you should make your boundaries clear, or it could keep happening/get worse.

definately set boundaries. If they're your friends then they likely didn't mean it, but they won't know you don't like it until you say something. Better to show it's a problem now and clear it then let it build up without them knowing they're doing something wrong.

I would mention it, just say something like, "I don't really feel comfortable with people touching me without my consent." And if they're really your friend they'd understand.
I'm sorry that happened to you luv

yes, i agree

So um, update…
The guy doesn't seem to want to leave the club, even after getting chewed out, and only one other person is in favor of a ban.
And their reasoning is "he seems like he wants to change, and also shows clear signs of neurdivergence and possibly being on the spectrum."
And like yes??? I understand all of that, but having to tell a 20-year-old man how not to act is so unfair on the rest of us. Also I don't want to be around the guy anymore, and I said if we don't ban him, I won't be attending meetings he's at. So if he doesn't get banned, I, the victim, will be further punished than the perpetrator. I will effectively be soft-banned from the club, as an officer.
We're definitely going to at a minimum suspend membership, but like, their excuses for not banning him feel like they're on some moral high ground and it sucks.
I've been around so many neurodivergent people, and none of them have ever made me feel that supremely uncomfy, so maybe it's not the neurodivergence that made him say what he did, maybe it's the fucking misogyny? Just a thought.

it's the fucking misogyny

Its this? Being neurodivergent is absolutely not an excuse and it's super fucking annoying that they're getting in the way of you and other women feeling safe in that club. I sincerely hope it works out

Thank you, Emi.
I might have to call in the big guns (aka my SO), but if I do, things could get a lot uglier.

i mean- sometimes that's what's necessary. they can't keep making excuses for him, cuz then he'll never learn. like you said, he's a grown man, he needs to learn how to act.