@Wry_Wyvern
"Do you think I would be a good drum major?"
"On a scale of 'meh' to 'I think the fuck not,' you score a solid 'oh lord; has it come to this?'"
"Do you think I would be a good drum major?"
"On a scale of 'meh' to 'I think the fuck not,' you score a solid 'oh lord; has it come to this?'"
"Whole foods is scary…"
"Do you think I would be a good drum major?"
"On a scale of 'meh' to 'I think the fuck not,' you score a solid 'oh lord; has it come to this?'"
THIS
IDK the age of this human, but I found THIS on wikihow:
I am in the Undertale Fandom and I have seen some terrible things. Am I still allowed in church?
so true
Tru
"WATER IS NOT WET!"
"YES IT IS YOU IGNORANT CLOD!!"
Me: goes down waterslide: I'M A GENERAL!!!!
My friend going down behind me: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Me: rolls around on the floor like a little kid singing crazily
My mom: shakes her head and walks away, embarrassed by me
Me and my friend after seeing west side story at a high school.
Me: set's hand dramatically on the stage and flips hair, staring at an actor "Look kate, it's..Riff"
“I AM READY TO BLEED BITCHES!!!”
7th grade
My Friend on the first day of school to the IMSA teachers: Can we sacrifice goats to santa?
My other friend: Oh yeah! We do need something to sacrifice this year!
6th grade:
After reading a story about a boy who saved his pet pigion from being thown into a fire as a sacrifice
Entire class: Sacrifice! Sacrifice! Sacrifice!
English Teacher: sigh
7th grade
First day in our english class
Class: talking about books and stuff
6th grade English teacher walking by in the hall way: Wait a couple months before scarificing any birds this year please.
New english teacher: What?
First couple weeks of highschool this year
Bio teacher: And if you look on my desk, you can see a jar where I keep my last years class's tears.
Class president: Can I just drop out and Not do this? Please?
Play Practice
Me: falls while dancing to africa by toto and procides to have brused my entire knee for a week
Me: AnDreA I tHinK I ScrApEd My KneE
Me: goes down waterslide: I'M A GENERAL!!!!
My friend going down behind me: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
i love your friend now
Me and my cousin making a high school musical video:
Cousin: I'm SHARPAY! IM HOT! I LOVE TROY!
Me: SHARPIESSSSSSSSSSS
"Let me die in peace and quiet and harm- HOLY SHIT IS THAT A BUG!"
"I don't have time for a mental break down right now, I'll do it later."
“Why do you have 7 bags of popcorn in the middle of uniform inspection?!”
Lmao these are hilarious
I have a bunch more bug ones, I hate bugs and have been put into a lot of things
Hey, do y'all mind if I occasionally quote college students? Because they're like high schoolers without their parents around to tell them they're being idiots. It's wonderful.
Hey, do y'all mind if I occasionally quote college students? Because they're like high schoolers without their parents around to tell them they're being idiots. It's wonderful.
Yass! Do it!
Oh, I've got one. So at my school, we have a coffee and tea club, and we started calling the phone numbers on the backs of tea boxes.
One conversation:
A (club president)- Hi, I was just calling to ask about how your tea supports a healthy lifestyle?
Guy on the other end of the line (we'll call him B)- Uhhh?
A- Yeah, on the back of the box, it says, "call us for more information on how our tea supports a healthy lifestyle. You don't get people calling about that?
B- This is the first time.
(After a few minutes, and it being obvious that B had gone to google stuff)
B- (I don't remember it all, but…) It's got antioxidants (this man also struggles to say antioxidants)
There's a bit more, but that was the highlight.
2.
A- Hi, we were calling to give you feedback on your tea. We're part of a club, and some of the members have questions too. Would you be willing to answer them?
B- Sure.
M(another member of the club)- Hey, so how does your tea get its red color?
B- Um… uh…
A- It's okay, you don't have to explain it if you don't want to. By the way, your tea is great (goes on to compliment the tea and the company a little more in depth.)
AND THE CLUB ENDED UP WITH COUPONS!!!
I had to leave after the second call, but oml… I love these people so much.
(That sounds awesome lol)
Me- Another day of pain and misery!
My friend- Do you mean life or school?
Me- What if I told you it was both?
Friend- Then I would go the fuck back to bed.
Here's another one:
Drama Club president- We are gathered here today because someone wouldn't shut up when the teacher was speaking.
The rest of the club- Without a moment of pause Ethan?
President- Ethan
Instructor: If anyone makes a dab joke applying makeup, I swear to God I will kick you out!
The nicest and most innocent in the play: What's a dab joke? Is it like (he dabs) THIS?
"Wait, hold up! Where's my cyanide?"
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