Ever since I decided to actually take a step towards getting better by talking to others about my problems, it’s like half the people I care about and look up do have stopped taking me seriously
They’ll tell me all these kind things as if they really care and then proceed to tear me down even further-
I know they aren’t trying to, they really do just want the best for me, but at the same time, if you really want the best for me then why won’t you listen? Can you not at least try to understand?
I don’t need to “just grow up” —well, yeah I do- but that’s not going to change these things
There’s something wrong with my brain, I don’t know what exactly, but it’s not something that just goes away in an instant and you most definitely aren’t helping
And while not a lot of people at all have been reacting this way towards the depression itself, they most definitely have been towards my sudden fear
I think I might have genophobia/whatever it’s called I don’t know ok
Spoiler - click to show.
AKA Fear of everything even remotely sexual
And while I know it’s common for younger humans to be uncomfortable with such a topic, this is more than just discomfort, this is full on panic, headaches, nightmares, and tears.
I’ve told you that before, and you always react so sympathetic as if you actually believe me, like you really do care-
But if you really care then why didn’t you prove it?
Stop making jokes you know I’m not okay with, stop telling me I’ll change my mind when I’m older, stop trying to put me in uncomfortable situations, and please, please just try to take me seriously…
I‘m so sick of this…
I was hoping by talking to people I’d at least find someone who would understand, even one person, but now I just feel so alone-
is there anyone out there? anyone?
…And so that complete block of nonsense text and contradicting statements that changes tenses like 1000 times and written by someone with no sleep is why I hate humans today.