delilah: i'm not stupid, you know. i have general knowledge in practically every area!
luca: how do you spell 'orange'?
delilah: the fruit or the color?
luca:
killian: are you tall enough to play basketball though?
juniper: are you calling me short?
killian: i'm calling you vertically challenged.
may: i’m gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so i can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.
killian: my only talent is being stress.
mariette: don't you mean stressed?
killian: no.
luca: can you pass the salt?
may: can you pass away?
luca: too much salt.
Casey: I'm not stupid, you know. I have general knowledge in practically every area!
Harper: How do you spell 'orange'?
Casey: The fruit or the color?
Beck: Oh God no.
Everett: Are you tall enough to play basketball though?
Clyde: Are you calling me short?
Everett: I'm calling you vertically challenged.
Erica: I’m gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so I can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.
Richard: Can you pass the salt?
Violet: Can you pass away?
Richard: Too much salt.
Millie: can you pass the salt?
Takeo: can you pass away?
Millie: too much salt
juniper: sleep is the body’s best safety mechanism.
luca: how so?
juniper: it keeps you from screwing up for 8 hours.
juniper: i tried to write ‘i'm a functional adult’ but my phone changed it to ‘fictional adult’ and i feel like that’s more accurate.
delilah: so, may, do you have a crush on anyone?
may: the only crush i have is this crushing anxiety.
luca: the floor is lava!
mariette: [helps delilah onto the counter]
may: [kicks juniper off the sofa]
killian: [lays on the floor] i accept death.
luca, sarcastically: great work, everyone.
delilah: i don't know, it's not my cup of tea.
luca: well then who's is it?
delilah, staring at a cup of tea, tearing up: i don't know!
Ikxenspump: I’m sad.
Robin: Hold on.
Robin: leaves to another room
Robin: returns, with a gallon’s worth of pristine, white fluff in her arms
Ikxenspump: Where’d you get that?
Robin: I keep it in my bag for emotional emergencies.
Ravina: I've given it a lot of thought, and my love language is that I'll hold a grudge on your behalf until the end of time.
Ravina: Even if you get over it, I'll continue to feel rage over what happened to you until the end of time.
Ravina: It's your responsibility to heal and do what's best for your mental health. It's my job to take names.
Ara: sleep is the body’s best safety mechanism.
Andor: how so?
Ara: it keeps you from screwing up for 8 hours.
Taven: I'm not stupid, you know. I have general knowledge in practically every area!
Farli: How do you spell 'orange'?
Taven: The fruit or the color?
Farli: Oh Gods no.
Andor: I’m gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so I can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.
Peregrine: I've given it a lot of thought, and my love language is that I'll hold a grudge on your behalf until the end of time.
Peregrine: Even if you get over it, I'll continue to feel rage over what happened to you until the end of time.
Peregrine: It's your responsibility to heal and do what's best for your mental health. It's my job to take names.
Estella: I'm not stupid, you know. I have general knowledge in practically every area!
Peregrine: How do you spell 'orange'?
Estella: The fruit or the color?
Peregrine: Oh God, no.
Peregrine: Sleep is the body’s best safety mechanism.
Estella: How so?
Peregrine : It keeps you from screwing up for 8 hours.
Kels: I've given it a lot of thought, and my love language is that I'll hold a grudge on your behalf until the end of time.
Kels: Even if you get over it, I'll continue to feel rage over what happened to you until the end of time.
Kels: It's your responsibility to heal and do what's best for your mental health. It's my job to take names.
Geneva: Sleep is the body’s best safety mechanism.
Jackson: How so?
Geneva: It keeps you from screwing up for 8 hours.
Georgie: I'm not stupid, you know. I have general knowledge in practically every area!
Eleanor: How do you spell 'orange'?
Georgie: The fruit or the color?
Christopher: Oh Gods no.
Dallas: Have you ever told someone to get out of your house.
Ara: No. But that sounds thrilling!
Ara: Andor, I need your coordinates.
Andor: I’m by a rock that looks like a lion.
Ara: could you be more specific?
Andor: It looks like Simba.
Ravina: Are you going to help or are you too pretty?
Milo: I’m too pretty.
Crispin: I’m so sad Eva and Caleb aren’t with us. They’re my best friends.
Kit: What about me?
Crispin: You’re my worst friend.
Ara: now that I have your attention-
Andor: you don’t have my attention
Ara:
Ara: Spiderman.
Andor: I’m listening…
Gerard: How come you've been abnormally nice to me lately?
Crispin: What the fuck do you mean?
Gerard: You just seem nicer than usual
Crispin: I'll punch you in the face if you want
Hank: Have you ever told someone to get out of your house?
Clive: No. But that sounds thrilling!
Leon: Aubrey, I need your coordinates.
Aubrey: I’m by a rock that looks like a lion.
Lydia: Could you be more specific?
Aubrey: It looks like Simba.
Lydia: Are you going to help or are you too pretty?
Kitty: I’m too pretty.
Oona: I’m so sad Hank and Simon aren’t with us. They’re my best friends.
Niklos: What about me?
Oona: You’re my worst friend.
Jesse: I'm not stupid, you know. I have general knowledge in practically every area!
Gracelyn: How do you spell 'orange'?
Jesse: The fruit or the color?
Gracelyn:
Jesse: Why is there blood everywhere?
Hex: I may have aggressively poked someone with a knife.
Jesse: You stabbed someone?!
Hex: No. I poked them aggressively. With a knife.
Delphinia: I told Clem I'd cook dinner and I don't know how to cook, just bake-
Jesse, pouring milk directly into a bag of cereal: And you think I can help?
Jesse: I’m gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so i can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.
Jesse: My only talent is being stress.
Gracelyn: Don't you mean stressed?
Jesse: No.
Delphinia: Can you pass the salt?
Auria: Can you pass away?
Delphinia: Too much salt.
Jesse: The floor is lava!
Clem: [helps Martell onto the counter]
Hex: [kicks Gracelyn off the sofa]
Auria: [lays on the floor] I accept death.
Jesse, sarcastically: Great work, everyone.
Gracelyn: Jess, I need your coordinates.
Jesse: I’m by a rock that looks like a lion.
Gracelyn: Could you be more specific?
Jesse: It looks like Simba.
Jesse: I’m so sad Delphinia and Gracelyn aren’t with us. They’re my best friends.
Hex: What about me?
Jesse: You’re my worst friend.
Gracelyn: Now that I have your attention-
Jesse: You don’t have my attention.
Gracelyn:
Gracelyn: Spiderman.
Jesse: I’m listening…
granite: fruits that do not live up to their names; passionfruit, grapefruit, honeydew and dragonfruit.
granite: fruits that do live up to their names?
granite: orange.
red coral: and i'd love to be sorry for that, but we all know i've done much, much worse.
granite: i know one person who finds me funny!
rainbow quartz: okay, who? …and you can't say yourself.
granite: okay then i'm out.
sapphire: met a dumbass today. awful.
red coral: you looked in a mirror?
sapphire: someday you will have to answer for your actions and god may not be so merciful.
tourmaline: [writing a letter]
tourmaline: dear santa,
i'm writing to let you know i've been naughty…
and it was worth it, you fat, judgemental bastard.
Jesse: Fruits that do not live up to their names: passionfruit, grapefruit, honeydew and dragonfruit.
Jesse: Fruits that do live up to their names?
Jesse: Orange.
Hex: And I'd love to be sorry for that, but we all know I've done much, much worse.
Hex: I know one person who finds me funny!
Jesse: Tell us who …and you can't say yourself.
Hex: Okay then I'm out.
Gracelyn: Jesse, we need to talk about your professionalism.
Jesse, on top of a table: Those are some mighty brave words for someone standing in lava.
Hex: Why does everyone always assume the worst in me?
Gracelyn: It saves time.
Gracelyn: How did none of you hear what I just said?!
Delphinia: I've been zoned out for the last two and a half hours.
Auria: I got distracted halfway through.
Jesse: I was too focused on the fact that you're safe to comprehend what you were saying.
Hex: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
rainbow quartz: granite, we need to talk about your professionalism.
granite, on top of a table: those are some mighty brave words for someone standing in lava.
granite: why does everyone always assume the worst in me?
red coral: it saves time.
amber: there's no way they like me back.
tourmaline: onyx would throw themself in front of a moving car for you.
amber: onyx would throw themself in front of a moving car for fun.
rainbow quartz: so i have made the decision to trust you.
red coral: a horrible decision, really.
onyx: i've given it a lot of thought, and my love language is that i'll hold a grudge on your behalf until the end of time.
onyx: even if you get over it, i'll continue to feel rage over what happened to you until the end of time.
onyx: it's your responsibility to heal and do what's best for your mental health. it's my job to take names.
Feather: There's no way he likes me back.
Bright: Redwhisker would throw himself in front of a moving car for you.
Feather: Redwhisker would throw himself in front of a moving car for fun.
Mara: Choose kidness. Will you choose kindness?
Emily, through a mouthful of honey nut cheerios: No, I choose violence
Finn: There's no way she likes me back.
Phoenix: Delphinia would throw herself in front of a moving car for you.
Finn: Del would throw herself in front of a moving car for fun.
Jesse: So I have made the decision to trust you.
Hex: A horrible decision, really.
Delphinia: Choose kindness. Will you choose kindness?
Hex, through a mouthful of honey nut cheerios: No, I choose violence.
Hex: When people get to close with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don't really care about them.
Gracelyn: That's genius, Herman.
Delphinia: Why are we pretending I'm this guy's niece?
Jesse: We need money.
Delphinia: We're scamming him?
Jesse: I was thinking more like flat-out stealing from him.
Delphinia: What?! No way!
Jesse: Why not? We already stole a cat.
Delphinia: No we didn't! Hex is a talking cat, he can do what he wants!
Hex: I want to steal.
Gracelyn: Who hurt you?
Jesse: Do you want a list or what?
Gracelyn: …
Gracelyn, pulling out a sword: Actually, yes.
Martha: Choose kindness. Will you choose kindness?
Geneva, through a mouthful of Honey Nut Cheerios: No, I choose violence.
chime: choose kindness. will you choose kindness?
gizmo, through a mouthful of honey nut cheerios: no, i choose violence.
gizmo: you know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.
chime: those are wanted posters!
gizmo: [sharpens knife] we've got ways of making people talk.
gizmo: [cuts piece of cake]
pierre: …can i have some?
gizmo: cake is for talkers.
gum: i am very small and i have no money, so you can imagine the kind of stress that i'm under.
Hex: You know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.
Jesse: Those are wanted posters!
Jesse: I am very small and I have no money, so you can imagine the kind of stress I'm under.
Gracelyn: It's okay to ask for help!
Delphinia: You're not a burden!
Hex: Murder is okay!
Jesse: Your feelings matter!
Jesse: Can you get me something to drink please?
Hex: Unless you're literally dying, I'm not moving an inch.
Delphinia: Ask Gracelyn and tell her we'll die if we don't stay hydrated.
Gracelyn: Then perish.
Hex: Okay, just for a second, let's pretend I'm an idiot.
Gracelyn: I'm already there.
Auria: Why aren't you watching your team?
Clem: They're highly competent, I don't need to watch them every sec-
Jesse, desperately running in: Clem! Delphinia tried to make pasta in the coffee pot and broke everything!
Christi: You know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.
Fern: Those are wanted posters.
Ferrin: Who hurt you?
Wisp: Do you want a list or what?
Ferrin: …
Ferrin, pulling out a sword: Actually, yes.
Natalie: What did you do now?
Mia: Okay, but you can't get mad-
Natalie: What. Did. You. Do.
Mia: Okay, but first, I was minding my own business-
Natalie: LIES.
Mia: I WAS!
Ariana: How many children do you have Matthew?
Matthew: Biologically, legally or emotionally? Because there is a difference.
Natalie: Did you buy eggs like I asked?
Mia: Even better!
Natalie: What did you do…
Katrina, holding up a chicken: Her name is Maude!
Marie: Who hurt you?
Catherine: You want a list, or what?
Marie:
Marie, pulling out a sword: Actually, yes
Richard: Did you buy eggs like I asked?
Henry: Even better!
Richard: What did you do?
Henry, holding up a chicken: Her name is Maude!
Richard: You know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go
Marie: Those are wanted posters
Henry: Okay, just for a second, let's pretend I'm an idiot
Marie: I'm already there
Henry: It's okay to ask for help!
Richard: You're not a burden!
Marie: Murder is okay!
Catherine: Your feelings matter!
Clyde: Wow, you know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.
Jane: Those are wanted posters.
Jonah: Okay, just for a second, let's pretend I'm an idiot
Everett: I'm already there
To Victor
Henry: It's okay to ask for help!
Alice: You're not a burden!
Geneva: Murder is okay.
Jackson: Your feelings matter!
Mia: You call it 'bad at darts' I call it freestyle acupuncture.
Dominic: Ma'am, I'm going to have to ask you to leave the bar.
Fern: Welcome friends!
sees Ferrin
Fern:… and enemies.
skye: it's okay to ask for help!
midd: you're not a burden!
rick: murder is okay.
miz: your feelings matter!
miz: can you get me something to drink please?
midd: unless you're literally dying, i'm not moving an inch.
skye: ask rick and tell him we'll die if we don't stay hydrated.
rick: then perish.
rick: my ultimate goal is to punch god in the eye, just to spite him one last time.
miz: a pessimist sees a dark tunnel.
skye: an optimist sees light at the end of the tunnel.
midd: a realist sees a freight train.
rick: the train driver sees three idiots standing on the tracks.
miz: i've connected the dots.
midd: you didn't connect shit.
miz: i've connected them.
miz: i'm gonna need a human skull but you can't ask why.
midd: only if you also don't ask why.
midd: [pulls four pristine human skulls out of their bag]
miz: …
miz, grabbing a skull: this one will do.
