forum Incorrect Quotes 2: Electric Boogaloo

Started July 17, 2020 by @HighPockets group

tune

Gerard: Sure, I don’t get a “healthy” amount of sleep like SOME PEOPLE do but can they do THIS *stands up, blacks out for a second*

Jackie: I'm actually concerned about boys who complain about how different girls look without makeup. Like, did you think eyeshadow permanently alters a girl's eyelid? Are you frightened when people change clothes?
Holly: Babies have no concept of object permanence.
Jackie: That is one of the sickest burns I've ever heard.

Andor: Sometimes it's annoying when your character can't jump in a video game, but how often do you jump in real life?
Dallas: "Do you even remember the last time you jumped" is a question I never anticipated to leave me feeling so hollow and terrified.

Taven: So, that’s the plan!
Farli: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean.
Taven: No, go ahead, I want to hear it.
Farli: Your plan fucking sucks.
Taven: That’s not constructive!

Andor: Has anybody ever actually gotten salmonella from eating raw cookie dough or are people just trying to stop me from living my life?

Gerard: I love you, Adelia. You're the best thing that's happened to me.
Adelia: I'm the best thing that's ever happened to you?
Gerard: Yeah.
Adelia: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

Kristi: I'm actually concerned about boys who complain about how different girls look without makeup. Like, did you think eyeshadow permanently alters a girl's eyelid? Are you frightened when people change clothes?
Kate: Babies have no concept of object permanence.
Kristi: That is one of the sickest burns I've ever heard.

Jonah: Sometimes it's annoying when your character can't jump in a video game, but how often do you jump in real life?
Everett: "Do you even remember the last time you jumped" is a question I never anticipated to leave me feeling so hollow and terrified.

Alice: With all due respect, which is none, I hate you.
Chase:
Chase: I literally just asked where Levi is…

Iulian: If you like me raise your hand.
Esmeralda: What if I don’t like you?
Iulian: Then raise your fucking standards.

Alice: What's your type?
Esmeralda: Of what?
Alice, sarcastically: Blood.
Esmeralda: Oh right. A-Negative.

Esmeralda: Sometimes it's annoying when your character can't jump in a video game, but how often do you jump in real life?
Levi: "Do you even remember the last time you jumped" is a question I never anticipated to leave me feeling so hollow and terrified.

Alice: Chase isn’t answering his phone.
Levi: I can try calling him.
Alice: Esme and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-
Chase, picking up on the first ring: What the FUCK do you want Levi?

Ivy: I love you, Iulian. You're the best thing that's happened to me.
Iulian: I'm the best thing that's ever happened to you?
Ivy: Yeah.
Iulian: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

Claudia: Has anybody ever actually gotten salmonella from eating raw cookie dough or are people just trying to stop me from living my life?

Levi: So, that’s the plan!
Esmeralda: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean.
Levi: No, go ahead, I want to hear it.
Esmeralda: Your plan fucking sucks.
Levi: Okay, well that's not constructive.

Collin: I've invited you into the woods because I crave the most dangerous game
Fraser and Isla, nodding: Knife Monopoly
Collin:
Collin: I was actually gonna hunt you for sports but now I wanna know whatever the fuck knife monopoly is.
——————————————–
Zackery: what is toothpaste, if not bone soap?
Rose: Existence is a prison and being your friend is maximum security.
——————————————–
Michael: This food is too hot, I can't eat it :(
Beth:
Lila:
Fraser:
Isla:
Zackery:
Zackery: You're hot and I'd still eat you-
Rose, slamming his hands on the table: ONE DINNER
Ann: Here we go-
Rose: ONE DINNER IS ALL I ASK
——————————————–
Michael: Zacks run off, can you help me find him??
Rose: What, do you think I have him microchipped or something?
Michael:
Micheal: Do you?
Rose: Yeah, hang on.

Estella: What is toothpaste, if not bone soap?
Peregrine: Existence is a prison, and being your girlfriend is maximum security.

Estella: I'm actually concerned about boys who complain about how different girls look without makeup. Like, did you think eyeshadow permanently alters a girl's eyelid? Are you frightened when people change clothes?
Peregrine: Babies have no concept of object permanence.
Estella: That is one of the sickest burns I've ever heard.

Clem: What kind of tea is this?
Delphinia: Oh, I boiled some Gatorade!

Jesse: Name one time I haven’t acted professional!
Hex: You’re holding a juice box right now.
Jesse: It’s to stop me from spilling my juice.

Jesse: Sure, I don’t get a “healthy” amount of sleep like SOME PEOPLE do but can they do THIS stands up and blacks out for a second

Jesse: Has anybody ever actually gotten salmonella from eating raw cookie dough or are people just trying to stop me from living my life?

Hex: With all due respect, which is none, I hate you.
Gracelyn:
Gracelyn: I literally just asked where Jesse is…

Jesse: Delphinia ran off, can you help me find her?
Auria: What, do you think I have her microchipped or something?
Jesse:
Jesse: Do you?
Auria: Yeah, hang on.

Jesse: falls off a roof, crashing into the bed of a pickup truck
Gracelyn, not taking her eyes off the road: Hey, Jesse.
Jesse, casually sitting up: Hey.

Delphinia: I have good news and bad news! Which do you want to hear first?
Jesse: …good.
Delphinia: It is very unlikely that I will ever, EVER do it again.

Delphinia: How do you feel about children?
Hex: Um, they're okay, I guess. I mean, if I saw one I wouldn't throw a rock at it.
Jesse: Why would you throw a rock at a child?
Hex: I just said I wouldn't.

Clyde: Falls off a roof, crashing into the bed of a pickup truck
Jane, not taking her eyes off the road: Hey, Clyde.
Clyde, casually sitting up: Hey.

Ethan: What do you look for in a guy?
Reese: I look away.
~
Sage: When were your "ugly years"?
Minnie: Birth to present
~
Ethan: On the outside I skrt skrt but on the inside I hurt hurt
~
Reese: I think you use humor to deflect serious trauma-
Ethan: Thank you
Reese: …I didn't say that was a good thing-
Ethan: What I'm hearing is you think I'm funny
~
Sage: How are you single??
Minnie: You're about to find out, just hang tight-
~
Reese: There are two types of people.
Reese: I avoid them both.
~
Minnie: I'm not studying anymore, stress is bad for the baby.
Ethan: What baby??
Minnie: Me
~
Reese: I am so sick of your shit-
Ethan: Get well soon~
~
Reese: If I hear someone signing Hamilton in the shower again, I'm joining them in the shower so I can drown them.
~
Sage: (pours Monster Energy into coffee)
Sage: (drinks the whole thing)
Sage: I'm gonna die

Poli: What do you look for in a guy?
Tetra: I look away.

Dally: Falls off a roof, crashing into the bed of the pickup truck
Cyrus, not taking her eyes off the road: Hey, Dally.
Dally, casually sitting up: Hey.

Elliot: I think you use humor to deflect serious trauma-
Perry: Thank you.
Elliot: …I didn't say that was a good thing-
Perry: So what I'm hearing is you think I'm funny.

Quill: Sure, I don’t get a “healthy” amount of sleep like some people do, but can those same people do this?
Quill: Stands up and blacks out for a second

Ollie, on stage, running a Pokémon pun show with Terri: Wow, not ANAETHER pun! I’m gonna luse my mind!
Terri: You’re in luck, because I’ve got a full get-in-the-bag full of these!
Ollie: I’m gladyin’ to hear the next one!
Shaeir, in the audience: I’ll be gladead before this is over.
Caia, nodding: Hau bad do you think this will get?

Terri: Sure, I don’t get a “healthy” amount of sleep like some people do, but can they do THIS?
Terri: [stands up and immediately blacks out]

Shaeir, giving an inspirational speech: Take a stand. Fight back. Don’t let bullies bully you.
Terri: [grabs a music stand and slams it over Caia’s head]

Fred: Just don’t touch anything.
Bumble: Okay!
Bumble, after Fred leaves: Pyro, I’m gonna touch everything.

Terri: What's the first thing you notice about a guy when he walks towards you?
Caia: The audacity.

Thunder: Now for some witty back-and-forth banter! You go first!
Pyro: [incoherent violent screaming]

Terri: How do tall people sleep? Wouldn't their feet go right past the blanket?
Shaeir: Terri, it's three in the morning.
Terri: You can't sleep?
Shaeir:
Terri: Is it the blanket?

Mrs. Kestrel: When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying “Haven’t decided yet” is typically a good response.

Terri: What if Mike was short for Micycle?
Shaeir: Y'know, sometimes I wish the 2012 apocalypse really happened.

Mrs. Kestrel: This is a feeling stick. Whoever has the feeling stick can express their feelings without being judged.
Mrs. Kestrel: [Passes the feeling stick to Caia]
Caia: [Breaks the feeling stick in half]
Mrs. Kestrel: Believe it or not, this is not the first time someone has broke the feeling stick.
Mrs. Kestrel: [Pulls out a much smaller stick]
Mrs. Kestrel: I also carry travel size.

Shaeir: What made you change sides?
Terri: I guess I just saw the error of my ways.
Shaeir: … It was Jimmy, wasn’t it?
Terri: It was Jimmy.

Peter: What do you look for in a guy?
Kate: I look away.

Jackson: Falls off a roof, crashing into the bed of the pickup truck
Geneva, not taking her eyes off the road: Hey, Jackson.
Jackson, casually sitting up: Hey.

Shay and andrew (Our Supreme Lord and Overseer): staring lovingly into each other's eyes
Mitsuri: opens a can of soda
Shay: We were having a moment
Mitsuri: And I'm having a cola

---

andrew (Our Supreme Lord and Overseer), having a breakdown: This… is… killing me!!!
Kenji: Good. Die.

---

Julian: nerding out about Mari Lwyd
Tristan: So you're rap battling a horse skeleton to keep all your alcohol? And here I thought the Welsh had nothing to offer besides consonants.

---

Shay: What do you mean "this is an airport" and what do you mean I "can't carry alfredo pasta in my fanny pack"?

---

Flyx, quoting Diognes: In a rich man's house there is no place to spit but his face
Ace: spits on Flyx
Flyx:
Flyx: Fair enough

Emily: What do you mean "this is an airport" and what do you mean I "can't carry alfredo pasta in my fanny pack"?

Parsley, quoting Diognes: In a rich man's house there is no place to spit but his face
Alex: spits on Parsley
Parsley:
Parsley: …Alex I live with your brother in a one bedroom apartment
I do feel the need to clarify that they're not in a relationship, Hunter is 18 and Parsley is his very old, very reluctant caretaker. Hunter sleeps on the couch

Emily and Mara: staring lovingly into each other's eyes
Finley: opens a can of soda
Emily: We were having a moment
Finley: And I'm having a cola

Mara: Sure, I don’t get a “healthy” amount of sleep like some people do, but can those same people do this?
Mara: Stands up and blacks out for a second

Wolf: I know my judgement may be clouded because I like Alexis a little bit
Cin: You doodled your wedding invitations
Wolf: That was our joint tombstone
Cin: My bad

---

Shay: makes breakfast hot chocolate for themself for once
Shay: I made a something without the gods, be proud
Shay: Applaud me
Shay: This is a threat
andrew (Our Supreme Lord and Overseer): singular clap

---

Damien: I wish we could block people in real life
Harper: Restraining order
Selena: Murder

---

Shay: Dear, Santa
Shay: I'm writing to let you know I've been naughty
Shay: And it was worth it, judgemental bastard

---

Wolf: Why does nobody tell me when we have people over? I walked out of my bedroom wearing a "Say 'hey' if you're gay" shirt and boxers
Wolf: There were eight nobles in the council room
Wolf: Eight
Wolf: They saw

Estaban: When is your date of birth?
Callister: January 22nd
Estaban: What year?
Callister: Every year.

Nolan and Quinn: staring lovingly into each other's eyes
Sylvester: opens a can of soda
Nolan: We were having a moment
Sylvester: And I'm having a cola

Estaban: So, that’s the plan!
Callister: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean.
Estaban: No, go ahead, I want to hear it.
Callister: Your plan fucking sucks.
Estaban: That’s not constructive!

delilah: [falls off a roof, crashing into the bed of the pickup truck]
luca, not taking his eyes off the road: hey, del.
delilah, casually sitting up: hey.

---

killian: am i a boy? am i a girl? it doesn't matter. i'm going to burn your house down.

---

may: you use emoji’s like a straight person.
juniper: that’s literally the worst thing anyone has ever said about me.

---

luca: where did you get that tomato soup?
delilah: it’s actually a bowl of ketchup i just microwaved.

---

may: i'm not a morning person. i'm barely even a person.

---

killian: you’d be stupid to lay a hand on me.
delilah: oh, you’d be surprised how much stupid shit i do.

---

killian: something’s off.
luca: maybe you’ve finally developed human emotions and feel bad for hurting people.
killian: no, but that’s funny.

---

juniper: are you this rude to everyone?!
may: yup.
may: don't think you're special.

---

mariette: do you take constructive criticism?
delilah: not without crying

June: Am I a boy? Am I a girl? It doesn't matter. I'm going to burn your house down.

---

Adrien: I wish we could block people in real life
Lillith: Restraining order
June: Murder

---

Connor: That’s the key slice of truth we need to complete the entire truth pie.
Lillith: Ooh, can we get some actual pie?
Connor: I like the way you think.

---

Lillith: Real life should have a fucking search function or something.
Lillith: I need my socks.

---

Connor: We can’t tell you because you’re not a member of the club.
June: What club?
Adrien: The hating June club.
June: …The fuck? I should be the leader of that club!

---

Lillith: You really believe in June?
Adrien: Luckily, she believes in herself enough for the both of us.

---

Lillith: Do you take constructive criticism?
Adrien: Not without crying

Reese: Do you take constructive criticism?
Minnie: (crying) Y-yeah, sure, what's up.

Jesse: On the outside I skrt skrt but on the inside I hurt hurt

Auria: There are two types of people.
Auria: I avoid them both.

Gracelyn: Just don’t touch anything.
Delphinia: Okay!
Delphinia, after Gracelyn leaves: Hex, I’m gonna touch everything.

Delphinia: Now for some witty back-and-forth banter! You go first!
Jesse: [incoherent violent screaming]

Gracelyn, having a breakdown: This… is… killing me!!!
Hex: Good. Die.

Jesse: What do you mean "this is an airport" and what do you mean I "can't carry alfredo pasta in my fanny pack"?

Jesse: I wish we could block people in real life.
Gracelyn: Restraining order.
Hex: Murder.

Jesse: When is your date of birth?
Delphinia: April 23rd
Jesse: What year?
Delphinia: Every year.

Gracelyn: Where did you get that tomato soup?
Jesse: It’s actually a bowl of ketchup I just microwaved.

Hex: Something’s off.
Gracelyn: Maybe you’ve finally developed human emotions and feel bad for hurting people.
Hex: No, but that’s funny.

Gracelyn: Are you this rude to everyone?!
Hex: Yup.
Hex: Don't think you're special.

Gracelyn: Do you take constructive criticism?
Jesse: Not without crying

Gracelyn: In times of trouble, I think to myself, what would Hex do?
Gracelyn: Then I do the exact opposite.

Ethan: IT'S A MENTAL BREAKDOWN!
Minnie: (off-beat kazooing)
~
Sage: Oh sure, the media will tell you about how Minnie nearly died of pneumonia once, but they don't know about her worst illness.
Sage: It's called dumbass disease.
Minnie: (in the backround) No, I don't need a parachute-
Sage: And it's incurable.
~
Ethan: (officiating Minnie and Sage's wedding) Queerly beloved-
Minnie: Ethan.
Ethan: We are gathered here togay-
Minnie: Ethan stop.
~
Ethan: Are you a top or a bottom?
Minnie: I'm a threat.
Sage: (from the doorway) She's a bottom.
~
Minnie: (has idea)
Minnie: (inhales)
(muffled crashes heard throughout the base, quickly getting louder, concluding with the appearance of a shadowy, glowering figure in the doorway)
Sage: (from doorway) No.

killian: IT'S A MENTAL BREAKDOWN!
juniper: [off-beat kazooing]

---

mariette: i see the red flags, i acknowledge that they're there, and then i completely ignore them.

---

delilah: [officiating juniper and killian's wedding] queerly beloved-
juniper: delilah.
delilah: we are gathered here togay-
juniper: delilah stop.

---

delilah: that’s the longest worm i’ve ever seen.
luca: that’s a snake.

Zephyr: Wow, that’s the longest worm i’ve ever seen.
Tetra: …That’s a snake.

Kalif: So I've been thinking.
Quinn: Congratulations!
Kalif: Thank you!

Andor: When I was little my brother would beg me to put him in a pillow case and swing him around.
Andor: I know it's insane, but he only reason I'm telling you now is because we're grown ups now and my parents can't lose custody of us.

(learning how to play never have I ever)
Ara: Never have I ever failed a test.
Andor: Ok, that's good. But try something a little more edgy, like never have I ever seen a dead body.
Dallas: Takes a shot*
Andor: No, the idea is that you're supposed to take a shot every time you *have done something.
Dallas: Yeah, I know.

Taven: So I've been thinking.
Calidor: Congratulations!
Taven: Thank you!

Taven: Wow, that’s the longest worm i’ve ever seen.
Ravina: …That’s a snake.

Milo: i see the red flags, i acknowledge that they're there, and then i completely ignore them.

Kit: Are you this rude to everyone?!
Crispin: Yup.
Crispin: Don't think you're special.

Ara: There are two types of people.
Ara: I avoid them both

Matthew, having a breakdown: This… is… killing me!!!
Alexander: Good. Die.

Ara: When is your date of birth?
Andor: March 16th
Ara: What year?
Andor: Every year.

Morgan: When I was little, my brother would beg me to put him in a pillow case and swing him around.
Morgan: I know it's insane, but the only reason I'm telling you now is because we're adults now and my parents can't lose custody of us.

Learning how to play never have I ever
Victor: Never have I ever failed a test.
Jackson: Okay, that's good. But try something a little more edgy, like never have I ever seen a dead body.
Geneva: Takes a shot
Jackson: No, the idea is that you're supposed to take a shot every time you have done something.
Geneva: Yeah, I know.

Robin: Wow, that’s the longest worm I’ve ever seen!
Oberon: …That’s a snake.

Jackson: Are you this rude to everyone?!
Geneva: Yup.
Geneva: Don't think you're special.