Oh and I had my birthday and no one wished me happy birthday on here or over text or on social media and it was kinda pathetic.
And I have to go to IOP so if any of you have gone can you like share your experience or give me advice or something, it’s making me nervous
fucken hell, i missed your birthday fren???
jlkdsflksdf please tell me when it was so i can mark it down on that calendar, i don think i ever got your birthdays kljsdf
i'm so sorry-
big hugs @ fren
hap late bornaversary fren!!!!
i'm sorry i missed it-
[yes these things are why i pop back on here lkjsdf]
Oh and I had my birthday and no one wished me happy birthday on here or over text or on social media and it was kinda pathetic.
And I have to go to IOP so if any of you have gone can you like share your experience or give me advice or something, it’s making me nervous
Oh shit, I didn't see that, when was your birthday?
Also happy late birthday?
my mental health has been skyrocketing downwards
i was doing so well just a few days ago-
but each day it becomes more and more clear that even my closest friends aren’t to be trusted
nobody is
there’s no one else like me
i’m alone
i’m all alone
i keep trying to wait, hoping that something somewhere will make it all okay, but i really don’t think i can be saved
i’m just going to see how much longer i can go before i finally snap
Good morning
I had to spend 10 minutes cleaning blood off my floor and walls and hands
Bad Science again, Ash?
I told you to wait for Lizzie and I to help you.
i-
thank you, iz-
thank you so much…
dammit i'm tearing up-
Ay, Relsey. I get what you mean. This stuck at home thing majorly sucks. I'm a huge introvert so being alone from people for too long can be very detrimental. Literally thank God for NB because without you guys as a source of socialization I would have had a much worse quarantine.
I get the big family thing. I have seven siblings and we live in a small house. I room with my three brothers which is chill but hella cramped. It sucks.
Bro I hate Family Activities. Like, I love my family. But a good 90% of the time I want to hang with my family on my terms. Not even against hanging all the time. I just don't like being forced to. I guess I'm trying to say that your feelings make sense and I don't think they're selfish.
I'm the second oldest so I don't get your issues being young. I also don't think my siblings deal with that except when we talk about looks. But it really sucks that you feel like people don't see you as your own individual. If it's not just in your head (no offence but sometimes we feel things that aren't really true, maybe they compare a lot but still value you for you), you can either suck it up and wait, or you can go in a direction no one has gone before to make you different. Do any of them write?
As for being trapped… do you have a property? Or do you just live in a house. Just walking around or climbing trees might be good for you if you can.
And it had a Vietnamese actress, which by itself is really exciting cuz I never see anyone of my race on tv
but like shes gorgeous like absolutely stunning
I've never seen a Viet that beautiful like her ( NO OFFENSE TO ANY VIETS OR ASIANS.)
God, shes so pretty.
Ooh, what actress? Are you Vietnamese?
my mental health has been skyrocketing downwards
i was doing so well just a few days ago-
but each day it becomes more and more clear that even my closest friends aren’t to be trusted
nobody is
there’s no one else like me
i’m alone
i’m all alone
i keep trying to wait, hoping that something somewhere will make it all okay, but i really don’t think i can be saved
i’m just going to see how much longer i can go before i finally snap
Earthrocketing.
Well, no one is exactly like you. That's kind of the beauty of it.
But I know that being alone hurts. And you probably aren't. Everyone has a bunch of crazy issues. Yours just seem to be more niche.
And you can trust me. As much as I have shown you, you can trust me. I truly care about you and hope and pray (I do pray for you sometimes) that you will feel better and be better. You got us, Muffin, and it aint over until we say it's over. Just take one step at a time.
And it had a Vietnamese actress, which by itself is really exciting cuz I never see anyone of my race on tv
but like shes gorgeous like absolutely stunning
I've never seen a Viet that beautiful like her ( NO OFFENSE TO ANY VIETS OR ASIANS.)
God, shes so pretty.
Ooh, what actress? Are you Vietnamese?
Yeah and her name is Ngo Thanh Van
my mental health has been skyrocketing downwards
i was doing so well just a few days ago-
but each day it becomes more and more clear that even my closest friends aren’t to be trusted
nobody is
there’s no one else like me
i’m alone
i’m all alone
i keep trying to wait, hoping that something somewhere will make it all okay, but i really don’t think i can be saved
i’m just going to see how much longer i can go before i finally snap
I'm literally horrible at advice but here's some wholesome memes
https://www.pinterest.com/pin/310748443043809513/
i love you guys so much….
Hey, Ella, it'll be okay. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but someday it will be.
And it had a Vietnamese actress, which by itself is really exciting cuz I never see anyone of my race on tv
but like shes gorgeous like absolutely stunning
I've never seen a Viet that beautiful like her ( NO OFFENSE TO ANY VIETS OR ASIANS.)
God, shes so pretty.
Ooh, what actress? Are you Vietnamese?
Yeah and her name is Ngo Thanh Van
Oh dang she pretty. Btw you gonna post a pic of yourself on the Picture chat? You don't have to. Owen hasn't and Nie only gave a pic to Mir I think.
I did but only two people responded, so I don't think you'd want to see what I look like, lol. Kat knows what I look like though.
I looked for it but it looks like you deleted it. It was before I knew you so it seems I paid you no mind.
Band was…not great. It was super awkward and I was extremely stressed and embarrassed. And my ankle is flaring up again (I got tendonitis in my left Achilles two years ago at band camp and it didn't heal right so marching band is.. interesting)
hey ella i can’t help at like, all, but
I love you, my dear
I wanna see you irl someday and sqooze you in the squoziest hug there ever was to squoze
But you gotta be there for it
Ella, There is one person who understands you very well, and it's your self.
It can be very hard to love your self, I know it. I'm not asking you to magically love yourself, but I am going to ask that you stop actively punishing yourself. Ella the only person that understands you completely is also hurting you right now. You are tearing yourself apart.
You don't need to love yourself right now, you don't even have to like yourself right now, but please try to take the first step and stop attacking yourself.
People around you wont understand unless you are open with them, and that's scary that is so , so scary. I have two people I am totally open with, two, because it is so scary to let people in knowing they could hurt you. You don't need to trust all of your friends, you don't need to trust your whole family. All you need are a few good people to turn too, and it is a slow process letting them in, it is slow and painful and scary, but once you have that support system life get's so much easier. I know this isn't as great as my usual advise but Ella I love you so much, And I am sorry you are hurting.
hey ella
mental health is tricky and it's hard but like jyn said, it does get better. probably not right now and maybe not anytime soon but eventually it does get to a place where it's just okay
and I care about you. you're important and mean a lot to me and if I can help, I'll try
but y'know, we love you and we're all here for you
Brian's(is that his name?) absolute lack of what I think is common knowledge and survival skills annoys me to no end. i know its cuz i grew up going into the forest and researching survival skills, but still. some of what he does is so unbelievably stupid
That's kinda a part of the book? I think?
We read it in one of my classes and analysed it. I think a big part of what the book is saying is that human's are cripplingly reliant on technology to survive. I read it as a warning, we are not so reliant on tech that we couldn't survive at all in the wild, but we are at a point where a lot of us couldn't, and that spells disaster for any species.
Maybe, but Brian is also an absolute dumbass, i was younger than him when i read it and knew better than him
I think I procrastinate more now that I've kind of accepted I have ADD. Thoughts? I guess I was more ashamed of it before and so would try harder to snap out of it. But Idk what to do. Anyone have similar experiences?
