forum Your Personal Venting Space 3: Tokyo Drift
Started by @The-N-U-T-Cracker
tune

people_alt 145 followers

Deleted user

Vote to start a notebook.ai commune where we can all just live our lives and be chill.

@saor_illust school

hi i'd just like to rant for a bit
so i know that this extra fat i have on my tumtum is fat, but its good fat bc its decided that it needs to protecc one of my babymaking parts ( i wouldnt mind if it stopped working, honestly, tho ), the ✨uterus ✨
but like
after idek how many months (or years??) of bodyshaming my dads done and all of these expectations society has for women to be vvv thin or else it's just not healthy everytime i look down at my tumtum it's just
"youre fat," that voice of mine that obviously hates me whispers
"also unhealthy, bc you eat too much, so try not to eat tomorrow"
"go back to barely eating, and stay dehydrated while youre at it, too-"

ughhh
i really
want to go back to the time before i even cared about being chubby
;-;

sometimes i really
really
hate my brain

Deleted user

I get that, 100%.
But you're right, it's good fat, and fuck any male (or person with male body) who tells you otherwise. First of all, it is indeed different for us female bodied people because as Izzy said, we have uteruses and therefore we have a little bit of extra protection in front of it. Second, everybody has stomach fat, even people with solid abs and super thin waists.
We're always going to judge ourselves, likely more than we judge anyone else. Remember that you are good enough, your body is good enough, you are healthy and it doesn't matter if you don't look a certain way.

Love you two.

Deleted user

Nobody makes Izzy and Silly Muffin unhappy, especially not themselves
<3

Deleted user

Why is it that whenever I think about something I like or do something I like I literally get hit with such intense waves of happiness? Like I'll start watching Haikyuu or sometimes even just think about it and suddenly something happens that sends a shock of happiness throughout me that quickly builds up energy inside me until there are noises pushing at the back of my throat, begging to be released, and every limb of my body suddenly wants to move and I have the sudden urge to run a marathon but I have to suppress this sudden energy so I just end up aggressively squealing and shaking my arms/playing with my hands/shuffling around intensely. Is this just another weird tendency that I have or is there a reason behind this? Because I really need to know.

Deleted user

Euphoria type thing. Passion.

yeah, it's probably your special interest or something. i stim when rav plays unreleased songs because i love him, it's the same for you i guess
idk i'm Stupid but i think that's right

@berlioz

I have my first therapy session tomorrow. For some reason my mom has to be in there with me. While my therapist it getting to know "me" I'm gunna have to lie since my mom will be there. All of my issues are stuff I can't talk about with her in the room. The second session I'm afraid I'm gunna have to like, take everything back and be like "actually, that was all a lie, let me tell you who I really am."
Does anyone have experience with this? I don't understand the point. And I'm not really looking forward to it in general. I hate having to defend my feelings around my mom. I just want to talk freely.

Deleted user

I get that
Therapists are actually pretty used to that
It's not uncommon at all for kids to have the sort of double life thing

Deleted user

shit that's the biggest mood
especially for like,,,what you wanna be called

Deleted user

TW// ED, Relapse- Response to @fluvoxamine

@philosophicalmess

TW// ED, Relapse- Response to @fluvoxamine

Deleted user

TW// ED, Relapse- Response to @fluvoxamine

@philosophicalmess

TW// ED, Relapse- Response to @fluvoxamine

Deleted user

I should have never taken the MBTI test because I can't stop researching it and now I'm stressing out because I can't decide if I'm actually an ESTP because I relate so much to other personality types on despite this one being very accurate, it isn't perfect and help someone take this computer away from me.

@Relsey-TheElder

You know I was in a decent mood, listening to music singing my broken little heart out.
And then My mom told me to be quiet, and then I got really sad again and hid in a closet in the dark listening to soft piano music and other calming songs I used to listen to with my sister.
Moral of the story If I'm singing and dancing around the house It's because I'm suppressing a lot of pain so don't tell me to be quiet. The noise is keeping my demons asleep.

@Cloudy_is_trying_her_best

Tw for mentions of P—phelia(nothing sexual, but an adult dating a minor online), self-harm, s–cide attempt. Please don't worry about me for those, I wasn't in danger nor was I harming or attempting to… do anything, I just got dragged in. This was a while ago, and I just need to vent because it's been eating at me recently. Before I go into this, all the names I use are fake and not what the people in question go by, in person or online. All information is going based off of what I was told by the people concerned and some things I asked about. I'm not going to provide any evidence, since this is kind of a private matter. I just needed to let everything out.

So I had a close group of friends on Discord. We called each other our internet family, and even had two moms. We'd made our own "internet home" server so we could talk outside the fandom server we were in. Things were awesome for a while. We had our own collaborative AU we worked on together, we talked about a lot of shared interests, and we were there for each other. We even made joking "plans" for a house we would live in. Everything was great, and I would have died for each and every person in that server. Then things took a turn for the worse.

Things started going downhill when the moms realized that almost everyone who used the "bedroom" channel(for nsfw things, just to keep the sexual stuff out of the "gym" channel, which was meant for extreme topics in the violence category) was under 18. They took down the channel and you'd think "crisis averted", right? I guess not, since some people still had beef over it. I wasn't a part of it, since nsfw makes me VERY uncomfy, so I can't really detail much of what happened there. Most of the drama was kept to DMs and it was almost forgotten for a while after that–again, I wasn't a part of it, so I can't really discuss what all went down. Then one person in the server, who I'm gonna call Kylie, told another member of the server, Marc, that she had feelings for them. Marc said that they felt the same. Apparently Kylie had said that they couldn't be together because of their age gap(8 years, and Marc is a minor), but Marc pushed and said it was alright because they were at their country's age of consent, and eventually they started dating.

When they told the server, they got mixed reactions. A few people said they didn't agree with it but didn't push things, and as long as things stayed healthy they'd be okay with it. Some people fully supported them. There were also people who didn't agree with them at all, and some of them didn't express their opinions in the best ways. There was a lot of talking behind peoples' backs and spreading rumors–quite a few of which didn't even pertain to the situation. The person that was causing the most damage was Sam. They were one of Marc's closest friends before this went down as well, so it hurt them especially badly. Eventually, Kylie tried to overdose herself and failed, and Marc fell deeper into depression and started self-harming again.

Sam was the one who contacted me about it first, and they told me that Kylie and Marc were dating and had said that Kylie was being over dramatic about things and even told me that she had faked her suicide to try and get pity. After that, it's kind of a blur of fighting. I remember trying to get Kylie and Sam to talk, because they were both maddest at each other and I was just hoping that they could somehow talk it out and things would go back to how they were before. Kylie and Marc would put it off until Marc was eighteen and everybody would be happy and we could go back to being a family. Instead of that, however, there was a massive shitstorm involving manipulation, lying, and quite a few ties being cut. Now the server is pretty much dead, and I'm trying to reconnect with a few people that weren't as involved in the drama. It still hurts to think about, though. Kylie recently posted a rant on the server blaming everyone for all the bad that's happened in her life, from her old engagement falling through to the fact that now she's an alcoholic. It's…not good at all.

Sorry, that was a lot. I just needed to get it out.

@ElderGod-Icefire

Hng so apparently it's actually really easy for my personality type to just get. Sucked down into depression (INTP) and I looked up symptoms of what that looks like and it. Fits. Like a lot?

And uh. Idk if I should tell my mom bc I'm worried she'll think I'm making it up or exaggerating or something

@Musical_Queen

I have ACT's tomorrow. I was supposed to have them last year, but 'rona happened so they didn't. I've had the study guide for over a month and haven't touched it. I should be looking through it, but instead I have checked my email twice, did a face mask, draw 5 sharks, and work on my room before they paint it on Wednesday. I really don't want to take this test.