Big same, I think I finally sucked most of the dopamine out of it though, I haven't consumed it in anything other than art on pinterest in a while I think I read one of the books a while ago but I didn't know there were more?? I'm off to investigate
sadkjfghj character foils!!! Yes!!! I love them!!!!
I would like to be rude to my gramma for making my self-image go down the drain today. She didn't do it on purpose and I know that, but it still makes me absolutely hate my body more than I already do. So basically: in the last two years I've gained a lot of weight (probably like. 15-20 pounds) because I was stress-eating from moving around and losing everything I've ever known. So I stress-ate and gained weight and haven't been able to get rid of it yet. So I went from 130 pounds to like. 150-160 pounds. Moved from size 4-6 jeans to size 10-12. Which is. not great either and I know I need to lose weight, but it also means that a lot of my thoughts about my body are already negative, bc I'm short and there's nowhere for that weight to go but my stomach, ass, and thighs, and I have stretch marks everywhere and it's just. gross and I hate it.
My gramma still thinks i'm like. size 6, or 8 at the most, and she took me clothes shopping today and everything she was handing me was like 6 or 8 or size medium when I need 10-12's and size large (or extra large depending on the brand), and it almost made me want to cry because I had to tell her like five times "no, that's not going to fit me, i'm not that size anymore" and it just made me feel so bad about all the weight i've put on? and she didn't even mean to, it's not like she said anything or that she was handing me clothes that were too big, it's just that she was handing me clothes that were too small but were cute as fuck, and I couldn't wear them because I'm too big, and now my self-esteem is just. down the drain. and i hate it so fucking much??
anyway I just needed to rant and scream into the void ig, have a good day y'all
Oops missed an entire conversation, my bad guys!
Character foils are the best though, I love it.
and afhkdjsgbdfjgbdsh i need to watch the Tangled series, I keep forgetting to even tho it's on Disney+ and I have Disney+
15-20 pounds is so easy to gain though, it's like….not the end of the world and imma smack anyone who tells you it is.
yeah but idk how to lose it and i hate it. No one told me it was, but i had a doctor's appointment and i weigh around 160 and my mom gave me this look and was like "you really weigh 160 pounds?" and i just. i hate it, i have a little bit of a double chin and it's gross
what the fuck, it's actually easy to gain weight????
why has no one told me this
lately it's been so hard to like
not feel so bad about being chubby whenever my mind wanders to it
and i swear to god tumblr isn't helping in the slightest
like yeah cool yeet at me all those relatable depressing and anxiety-related things, but please for the love of god leave the pictures of girls with eds showing off their unhealthy skinny af bodies
it makes me feel like that is the standard
that is how i should look
and even though all logical braincells tell me it's so unhealthy and i should not think that way
literally every other cell in my body screams that i need to look that way and i?????
WHAT THE FUCK TUMBLR
anyways that turned from a response to a mini rant i apologise
but hey while im here, ill be rude to tumblr for that so fuck u tumblr
I'm generally okay with my weight, but my double chin is…mmm. Don't like it. My face is very soft and I don't want it to be.
part of my issue is i go back and look at pics from like. freshman year and ill be like "wow i look so pretty" and then i compare it to now and i'm like "fuck i look gross now" and it's just. blegh
Big same, I think I finally sucked most of the dopamine out of it though, I haven't consumed it in anything other than art on pinterest in a while
I think I read one of the books a while ago but I didn't know there were more?? I'm off to investigate
i think there's only like two but im??!! gonna read it vv soon
rapunzel and the vanishing village / rapunzel and the lost lagoon
but yeah
been thinking about cassandra lolol
"i just think she's neat"
anyway weight is weird and dumb and the fact that society has placed so much worth into a number is gross
also also this is very off topic but someone needs to stop me from going off in my english class about anything and everything because i write paragraphs even when i don't mean to and i haven't written anything in a long time but like bruh
tuesday i went off about MLK and stuff because my teacher asked us to comment our thoughts about a quote from him and stuff
lol okay gonna disappear for a week because i forget i exist here at all see ya next time nerds
I'm incredibly bad with essay writing, not gonna lie. I could write a paper about why I love Saga but research papers?? essays?? analyzing stuff?? hell no
sadkgfh bye!!
Research and persuasive papers are so much fun tho?? when they're a topic you're interested in?? because it's a chance to show off your brains and writing ability and be like "look how smart i am" lmao
okay for those of you who are concerned:
i made a post for easy weight loss tips that dont involve hours of treadmill running, on my makeup/beauty/fashion advice thread, but i can post it here too if needed. i know some really good tricks for losing a couple pounds at a healthy rate without having to spend hours working out
second, yeah it's super easy to gain. and trying to starve yourself(skipping meals, only eating tiny portions, etc) doesn't help prevent because then your body starts storing fat like crazy because it's worried for you, just a heads up. a couple days of left over pizza is a couple pounds added(drink lots of water. water bloat goes away faster than sodium bloat) and i know it seems horrible but it does go away! as long as you take care after noticing it, you'll be fine
Big same, I think I finally sucked most of the dopamine out of it though, I haven't consumed it in anything other than art on pinterest in a while
I think I read one of the books a while ago but I didn't know there were more?? I'm off to investigatei think there's only like two but im??!! gonna read it vv soon
rapunzel and the vanishing village / rapunzel and the lost lagoon
but yeah
been thinking about cassandra lolol
"i just think she's neat"
I'm generally okay with my weight, but my double chin is…mmm. Don't like it. My face is very soft and I don't want it to be.
same here.
like I don't care if I've got a bit of a tummy, it would be a bit hypocritical to think bad of myself for it when I find other girls with soft stomachs aesthetically hot as hell, but my face? no likey. doesn't work on me. make it go away >:1
do the ee oo faces
Okay so. My parents have a control app on my phone where they can control what apps I have, and they just (like ten minutes ago) took away Goodreads
Five or six hours ago I posted a review for a book where one character who is a man talks about maybe shapeshifting into a woman. I talked about this in my review
Now my Goodreads app is gone, and I am terrified. I am literally shaking because what if my mom read that review and that's why it got taken away? What if I'm about to lose all freedom over what books I read again? I'm about to cry and I'm terrified and I am so so sick of being in terror of my parents controlling what I do again, I hate this so much, I hate them so much
How would they have found it though? Idk about the app, but on the site it's not exactly the easiest to find your own reviews and there's not like a chronological list of them
sort of off topic, maybe not
control apps like that are really weird to me
maybe it’s just because I wasn’t really supervised with my internet usage (I was, by the slightest amount. But like. My parents never got anything to supervise me on the Internet. which I think was mainly a good thing, but also a bad thing in the way I’ve been exposed to Stuff I should have not been to begin with. but anyways I’m rambling)
like I’ve read several experiences(complaints, rather) of people having their internet usage being monitored by their guardians and there are multiple things that seem wrong with it
I don’t really know how to put my thoughts into words, but just know on stuff like that I’m pretty much against it. could be bias on my part, but that’s how I feel
on the goodreads thing, I don’t really know about the app itself or how it works (I’m not too familiar with those things, sorry) but I’m not sure if they would have been able to find the review?
They may have found something else on goodreads that provoked them to remove the app (unrelated to what you put out). But I’m not sure. That’s the only thing that I could think of.
its because its a direct violation of privacy and individual rights but so many parents think that children, especially theirs, are beneath having rights. you know. cause children arent humans
and like GOD FORBID your children GROW UP and MAYBE become THEIR OWN BEINGS
lots of those controlling parents seem to have this mindset that children belong to them, like possessions. even when you hit adulthood, you are still "theirs" in their mind and they try to control what you can and can't do to yourself or like
it blows my mind that there are parents out there like that, and then there's my mom who's casually like "maybe I should get an app like that for you and your sister" when I ranted about Ice's parents doing that a while ago. it terrified me because I am far from like them and I don't want them to know just how much I've diverged from them and their views