forum Tell Me Stuff You Heard High/Middle School Students Say!

Started September 23, 2018 by Deleted user

tune

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Friend: "Hold my hoops" gives me all her stuff she's holding and keeps earrings on
Me: confused expression

My chorus class has a "running sheet of 'Yama-isms'" that they want to keep on the piano so they can remember the stuff I said after I graduate, but they haven't been doing their job very well. Whenever I say something hilarious (which I usually forget the next day), they say that it's "going on the quote sheet," but I know for a fact that they haven't been writing anything down.

"Would you please stop tasting the potentially deadly mystery items just so that you don't have to burn them." My lab partner to me, because I didn't want to burn every sample on the list to see what it was.

"No, you are definitely not allowed to roast marshmallows on the Bunsen burners that are still being used to burn chemicals." My lab partner to me, the day after the previous thing. I had brought two bags of marshmallows. I roasted them anyway.

"I'm gonna ask for a pineapple from the Winter Wishes assembly." It was an assembly during the, you guessed it, winter, where they gave out gifts based on slips of requests. I got the pineapple. I also found out that I was allergic to pineapple.

"The fucking heteros are at it again." Me to my friend, before 'accidentally' stumbling into a couple making out in the middle of the hallway.

Say you'll remember me standing in your bathroom eating your soap like cheese

I don’t remember the full conversation but during a volleyball game at my school I listened to three students have an intense conversation about Naruto.

“Jensen Crackles”

"IMMA SHANK YOU IN THE SHOWER!!"

"What the fuck Mikel!"

"You stole my charging cable, now you are charged with thievery!"

"'If' isn't a word!"

"do you ever just rip your mouth apart?"

no, I can't say I have

“I’m going to kashoot myself”
-playing kahoot in English
“I’m going to Kermit suicide”
-kid in my history class

I worked at the School Store on week. Middle school kids came up to buy food.
"You should buy the skinnypop."
"You're a skinnypop."
"Your MOM a skinnypop."

Random kid: jumps off cafeteria table I HAVE CRIPPLING DEPRESSION

Little sister (not the baby): I don't like torturing people, which is why I don't want to be a teacher.
My mom (our teacher): …All I asked was for you to write your name

(MOOD!)

"Studies have shown that two out of three Matts are tiny. The other, third Matt is football quarterback sized."

Me, in the car: Sees a crow attempting to eat a whole bun in one bite NINA ZENIK???? IS THAT YOU??

Me, in the car: Sees a crow attempting to eat a whole bun in one bite NINA ZENIK???? IS THAT YOU??

(Heck yeah a Six of Crows reference!)

Me, in the car: Sees a crow attempting to eat a whole bun in one bite NINA ZENIK???? IS THAT YOU??

(Heck yeah a Six of Crows reference!)

(I have come to the realization that I both am Nina and love Nina.)

(MOOD!)

"Studies have shown that two out of three Matts are tiny. The other, third Matt is football quarterback sized."

You have absolutely no idea. Then again, we have at least two tiny ones, then a few quarterback-sized ones, and then Mr. Mountain Man himself. He takes up half the hallway alone and actually has a lot of great stories to tell. Must be a tradesman thing.

I just realized that I haven't mentioned that some of my friends memorized the Divine Praises by putting them to the tune of 'Chicken Fry'….that was a high point last year.

"Guys, I want the zombie apocalypse to happen right now. Like, this is why we warm up in derby. In case we have to skate away from the zombies"

(MOOD!)

"Studies have shown that two out of three Matts are tiny. The other, third Matt is football quarterback sized."

Ah yes, very true. I've known three Matt's, two were tiny, the third one is the size of Texas.

There’s probably a lot but I can’t think of many right now so:

“I think GalaxyUnicorn’s right eyebrow is fake.” -my friend (except it was my real name not GalaxyUnicorn)
If you want context, don’t even ask. That was my one really weird friend who always says weird random things

“Yes, our actors are stuffed rats.” -me during theatre one day
I’m putting context in spoiler

Like I said I’m sure there’s more but besides our inside jokes I can’t remember anything else right now.

"Hey, Jill, it looks like your wig is coming off."
"Hey Jill, do you wear a wig? Your hair is too nice to be real!"
"GUYS, THIS IS MY HAIR! I DO NOT WEAR A WIG!"

"Hey, Jill, it looks like your wig is coming off."
"Hey Jill, do you wear a wig? Your hair is too nice to be real!"
"GUYS, THIS IS MY HAIR! I DO NOT WEAR A WIG!"

My friends and I have actually had a simular conversation
We’re weird