forum Quotes from the List of Completely Weird and Random Things We’ve Overheard… (About 15 quotes will be posted daily, and feel completely free to add your own!)

Started April 03, 2023 by @IamNOTachickenok

tune

'So what are your feelings on the hanky-panky? Yay or nay?'

"WOOWIE THATS A CULE THAT IS BLUE"

"STOP TRYING TO FIGURE OUT MY CURSH WITH BLUES CLUES"

• "Lactose intolerant people can't drink breast milk." – silence – "What does that have to do with Legos?"

"There is no way i am pushing 5 kids out of my v@g!n@, Bill"

"YOUR MOM IS A HAIR DRYER!!!”

"I heard he pushed a teacher down the stairs" "He just showed her his south park underwear" "Oh."

It has come to my attention that I talk to myself while I draw, so here are some of my quotes:

• "Holy- oh my god, that looks like a broken finger."
• "Aw, yeah. That's a delicious-looking line right there, buckaroo-ski."
• "Maybe I should just burn the house down."
• "He's not supposed to be cute, he's supposed to bite ears off."
• "THAT'S WHO THIS BASTARD REMINDS ME OF - BOWSER JR."

XDD

Some quotes from the group chat

• "I love how nobody questioned my pain filled post from 1 in the morning" "As a man I know when to shut up"
• "Skrunkly" "STOP SAYING SKRUNKLY TO EVERYTHING" "Skrunkly"
• "Yeah, my mom seems to like you. "YOUR MOM LIKES ME???" "Yeah, she keeps saying that you should come over"
• "I have had to threaten to not curb stomp 2 people TODAY." "I was one of them"

"We killed them still." "Ya it was definitely our fault."
"We killed that bear for this"
"We killed every bear"
"I think that we should all go live in tents or die!"

"Are we talking about candies or brain cells?"

"Ooh movie day"
"Movie da-"
"Shut the fuck up, you dumb bitch"

"Wait, Nick Carraway is Spider-Man??"
"No, he's Thanos."

"No, no, no. Zip it. If you say another word, I will tie you up, and then yeet you to the moon."

"I should get more pieces of candy since I am perfection incarnate"

"Fellas, is it gay to ask your only friend who is also your neighbor to go to Coney Island with you late at night?"
"No??? Like that's literally the most platonic thing ever."

cries "I have to wait 6 months for the sun and the star," "you already told us this" "i know but its just so sad"
(im the one waiting 6 months cries)

"I'm hoping to get something from the university that we'd be able to – I see your hand up. No, we can't dissect Brandon."
"WOOHOO!"
"Aww, man."
"What the flip."

(On the phone) "Hello?" Pause "Stop screaming, then." Pause "Hello?" Pause "Okay, I'm sorry. Bye."

(On the phone) "Hello?" Pause "Stop screaming, then." Pause "Hello?" Pause "Okay, I'm sorry. Bye."

Yessss hahaha

“Synthetic weed!”

“IS THAT FRED FLINSTONE?!”
“What?!”

• "What the f- That's how you laugh?! You sound like a dog toy in a washing machine, my guy."

"Ow my uterus. Oh well, I've had worse cramps."

"I can't see. CAN I GET WATER ? I DONT NEED TO SIT" (They got hit in the head with a soccer ball. A very powerful headshot.)

"It would be fun to see what it really looks like. The inside of a person. To really know what happens when you get stabbed in the chest. To see how long it takes for someone to bleed out and die. To see all of my writing, played out in gruesome detail" "Bella you need professional help /j?"

• "This song makes me want to eat shrimp dipped in chocolate pudding and processed with the extracted salt of French fries."

More yeah

“Please bring your costumes back later this week. We don’t want you leaving naked!” “But I want to feel the BREEZE!”

“Wait. So he was with you, had a few children, divorced you, then had a child with another woman, the child being me, then left for another lady? Is the poor child aware of any of this…game?” “Nope!”

“I want to make my wifi password “wontoo3fore567ate9” so if anybody asks, it’s “123456789!”

“I want “Another One Bites the Dust” to be my funeral song!!!”

“I dOn’T wAn’T tO pWaCtiCe mY cApiTaWL Q’s, i wAnT tO fiGhT cWiMe iN gOfFaM!”

“Do you think if I asked Isaiah to sing at my funeral, he would say yes?”

“I don’t trust Bs.”

“If we find the dollars with mustaches on them, we get free food at the concession stand!”

“Grab my foot and pull!”

“Hello, my Crunchy Little Piece of Cilantro!”

“Isaiah is just banned…in GENERAL!”

“Wait- I-I-Isaiah loves glitter? I’VE FOUND MY KIND!!!”

“ISAIAH SHALL BE HIT WITH SPIIIIITE! SPITE HIM TAYLOR, SPITE!” “nOoOO!”

“January, February, March, April, May, June… jAsOn dErULo-”

“Did halloween happen again?” “No, we had closing night of the play.” * proceeds to preform the opening number for two random gas station employees *

“Months of the week!!!! January, february, march, and wednesday, thursday, friday,” “June~~~~” “These are the months of the week!”
“I can solve one of those by throwing things.”

“The letter “E” is the most used letter on this list, with a whopping 11,063 uses overall. And the letter “Q” is the least used, with an eXtRa whopping 65 uses!”

“Crochet Hook has stopped frequently appearing in my dreams. But someone else has. Should I be concerned?”

“You see, when you’re me, you can hunch over on your back, and no one will suspect anything.” “Chicken stole your scoliosis water bottle!” “She has a point. I didn’t suspect a thing.”

“YOU CAN’T BUY HOT POCKETS! YOU CAN ONLY BUY COLD POCKETS! YOU ARE EXPECTED TO SUPPLY THE HEAT, YOURSELF! DON’T BELIEVE THE LIES!”

“What is a group of bunnies hopping backwards called? A receding hare-line!” “You concern me.”

“Look! It’s a line of people named Carol!” “sWeEt cArOL-LiNe!”

“That book is huge! Where did you find it?” (Lila sends an image) Oh! That's the one I ran into when I had a squishmello on my head!!! ✨tHe mOrE yOu kNoW✨”
“Hashtag, sLaYqUeEngiRLbOsS!”

“I wISH I HAD A GAY GRAnDpA!”

“It’s a Borger!” “Or a hortdorg!” “HORTDORG!”

“My locker combination is 0-0-0 and my locker number is ✨negative 5✨!”

“Don’t bite your fingernails, that's how I got an ingrown toenail!”

“I don’t know what I’m doing. … That’s the quote of my life.”

“Spotify is recommending me #emo music that’s not me!”

“ I could cook a pancake on my thigh!”

“He had had his marbles, lost his marbles, and then found his marbles!”

“You may smell cows and manure, but I smell money!”

“DEAD SKIN! mAKE A SMoOTHiE!”

“WHY ARE WE SELLING MY HAIR!” “BECAUSE YOU DIED”

“I NEED A SCREWDRIVER!” “For what?” “For my SHOE!”

“It’s a bLuUuuUUUUUUUUe rUbBeRbAnD!”

Student struggles to open locker for video Teacher opens locker first try “Amateurs.”

“There is a line of people who want to hit you. Do you want to know what that’s called? A punchline!” “Haha! More people join the line. Do you want to know what it’s called now? A Continued punchline!” both die of laughter

“If you’re tired and you know it, clap your hands! cLaP cLaP If you’re tired and you know it, clap your hands! cLaP cLaP If you’re tired and you know it, and you really want to show it, if you’re tired and you know it, fall on the floor! falls”

“Mystical Amazing Pepper Transplant!”

“My leg is your canvas!”

“I make money from drug dealing. Kidnapping is just my hobby.”

“Just because I’m the drug dealer doesn’t mean I use them!”

“Momma? What would happen if Jesus jumped off of a diving board?”

“Woah! That’s a lot of toilets!”

“Woah! I want a paper airplane!” dies of paper airplane hitting him

“HE MISSED THE HANDBURGER”

“THE GIANT TOILET OUTSIDE IS HERE TO KILL US! EVERYBODY HIIIIDE!”

“Doesn’t look like you’re putting away your shoes!” “iM LiStEniNg tO aN aUdiOboOk bEcaUsE yOu sTrEsSed mE oUt!”

“Mom. Oldest Child Appreciation Day is on October 20th. eyebrow lift”

(Cannon) “There’s like, a bunch of random people that get my number from BeReal, and they’re like “hEy”, and I’m like, “oH hEy bAbe, wink how are you?” (Lila) gasp “I’m not friends with Cannon on BeReal, guys. I don’t feel BeRealed, I feel BeTrayed.” (Morgan) “Everybody gets Cannon’s number through me, I don’t know why! I get like, 5 texts a day asking, “hEy cAn yOu giVe mE cAnNon’S nUmbEr?” And I reply with “…sure?” (Chicken) “I think that’s how I got Cannon’s number…” (Kambree) “People are scared of Cannon.” (Cannon) bites at her (Raya) confusion as she watches everything unfold (Lila) “Ehh, I could take him in a fight. I could take him in a fight.” (Cannon) evil glare (Kambree, whispering) “hE’s a fUrRy!” (Cannon) deathly side eye

“If you and I were on an island together, and I died, reincarnated as a banana, and that was your only source of nutrition, would you eat me?”

“FUJI.”

“I’m trying to imagine you as a hero in my latest fantasy and it’s not working.” “Sometimes I imagine that my friends are girls.” “…that is the most random thing I have heard all day.”

“And then you started talking about her feet.”

“Clap No Clap Body Clap Asked Clap You Clap B***”

“Did anyone else chew on things when they were little?? My old barbies have chewed up hands and feet. I also had this red donkey thing that I used to chew on, it was like a hippity-hop.” “Polly Pocket items!”

“See those boots right there those would be a chew toy 5 year old me i know.”

“So because he had salmonella-” “HE GAVE BIRTH!!!” “No he had SALMONELLA.” “Oh, I thought that you said he had Sam and Ella.”

“Them boots be a chew toy. Mmm. And after a while, they had a pleasant taste.”

“Snitches are witches who end up in ditches because they ate fishes!”

“My mind immediately went ✨CANCER✨” “YAS”

“We need the stars they make the cancer look pretty.”

“No. Salmonella, he vomited.”

“I have unlocked new power! BEHOLD- (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧”

“Name an object Quick!” “Evil Smile” “Appropriate!!!! Appropriate!!!!”

“When your bisexual friend introduces you to a song about a closeted lesbian and it's actually good.”

“Did you just smash my mouse?”

🎶“I'm so lost from a romantic paradise..”🎶 “Oh no, Where did your pair of dice go 😞”

“If you picked a goat, and he opened a goat, would you switch to get the car?”

• "I'm not going to study when I get home, I'm going to be too busy playing Hello Kitty Adventure."

• "ah, yes, the old nepotism route"

• "Did you hear what Johnny said? He said he did your mom"

• "Canada sucks, 0/10, do not recommend"
  "Aren't you Canadian?"
  "Yes, that's why I'm telling you guys to never go there"

• "My favorite foodborne illness is trichinellosis because it makes you throw up worms"

• "I am literally the only one in this classroom who got 100% on this test, and I didn't even read the book, y'all are losers"

• "the day when we finally get to write fanfiction for homework is the day i will die happily"

• "eat the poor!"
  "you mean eat the rich, right?"

• "oh poor child, i can only imagine the horrors you went through"
  "why are you acting like you didn't go through the same thing as i did?"
  "because i, Mr. Oldmoney Mckee didn't go through the same struggles as a dirty commoner like yourself!!"

• "imagine if Damien ran for president? the country would go in shambles"
  "eh i don't know, it seems like he'd do an ok job"
  "bob, he literally smiles at every moment of the day"
  "oh, are you saying he's a serial killer?"

• "five of you are dirty rats, and the rest of you are upstanding American citizens"
  "in other words, five of are us "illegal immigrant" who came to steal jobs from the white lazy people of America?"
  "i meant there are five communists in the classroom but that works as well"

• "It was a fucking clown show. I'm talking backflip-handspring to cartwheel aerial-spaghetti combo."

“Take a bite of your child?”