PFFT I TRY
but the bitch makes me come out and have "family time." I can't be alone for five minutes without one of my parents coming to check on me. And I am required to go to both of the services he preaches on Sundays.
I never feel safe enough to tell him something without him turning it into a lecture, and then he gets mad when I try to figure out the reasoning behind what he's saying?!
Same. I always have to take a wild guess at what's okay for me to say and I've learned not to say anything that challenges their opinions at all in front of them
God, while I still have this basically hatred for my dad's comments right now-
Why the fuck does he always has to make jokes/ straight up degrading trans people when he preaches?! It makes me so damn uncomfortable, and I have to fucking sit through it twice! I just want to throttle him sometimes!! I never feel safe enough to tell him something without him turning it into a lecture, and then he gets mad when I try to figure out the reasoning behind what he's saying?!
If you're ok with getting your mom into it (if she's more understanding, more calm about things, etc), you should tell your mom about this. My brother does that with my mom a lot to my dad as well, because he tends to turn small things into lectures with him (telling him he has an attitude when he doesn't, saying he doesn't do enough around the house, etc). He does that to me too, but a little less.
PFFT I TRY
but the bitch makes me come out and have "family time." I can't be alone for five minutes without one of my parents coming to check on me. And I am required to go to both of the services he preaches on Sundays.
Wait, he's a preacher? Hoo boy, that could cause problems. Coming from someone who knows what some religious people say about LGBTQ…
Frankly speaking, it's a chest binder, and I use it to do exactly that; bind my chest. I may or may not be trans, I may or may not just have really low sensitivity to gender as a whole since I think all of this gender roles fuckery is absolute bullshit, I may or may not have dysmorphia of my chest (it's possible since I already have dysmorphia of my face). Whatever I may or may not be, that's eventually up to me to decipher.
The only sure thing I know is that when I wear it, I feel better about myself. And that's the only thing that matters for this.
I will say that I sympathize with (is dystrophia like dysphoria?) your issues and that you are the one in charge of what you do with your body and it’s no one else’s business.
Thank you, Dom. Dysmorphia is similar to dysphoria, but has nothing to do with feeling like the wrong gender/sex. For me, my dysmorphia makes me pick out every flaw until I no longer look human in my own eyes. I sometimes find myself just staring at my reflection, nitpicking every detail; my nose is too big, my lips too chapped, my eyes too small, my cheeks too chubby, my eyebrows too out of place, my teeth too yellow or white, my launch lines too odd, etc.
It is entirely possible that this feeling could be translated to the rest of my body, including my chest feeling too big or too small, or not shaped right.
I only ever learned I had it recently, since it's been written off as body issues or self-esteem issues, like it's a feeling I can cure by loving myself more. Unfortunately, it's not.
Same. I always have to take a wild guess at what's okay for me to say and I've learned not to say anything that challenges their opinions at all in front of them
I just shut up and say the bare minimum period.
If you're ok with getting your mom into it (if she's more understanding, more calm about things, etc), you should tell your mom about this. My brother does that with my mom a lot to my dad as well, because he tends to turn small things into lectures with him (telling him he has an attitude when he doesn't, saying he doesn't do enough around the house, etc). He does that to me too, but a little less.
This… is a bit more complicated than that. My mom has basically told me that, quote, "I'm not going to lie to your father. If he asks me, I will tell him what you say to me." Basically, there's a high chance he'll find out and lecture me on not trusting him. Honestly, I've just lost all ability to give to fucks about what he thinks of me anymore, and I just don't fight with him on things like I used to because nothing ever fucking changes.
Wait, he's a preacher? Hoo boy, that could cause problems. Coming from someone who knows what some religious people say about LGBTQ…
Oh yeah. And I believe in God and all, every week he makes me feel like I'm going to burn in Hell for thinking differently than him. I'm extremely terrified of Hell, btw.
This is the reason I like my new youth pastor. He's really accepting and supportive and all that and has VERY different views than some. But we haven't really gotten to talking about being gay yet
I also love his wife and kids but that's another story
I never feel safe enough to tell him something without him turning it into a lecture, and then he gets mad when I try to figure out the reasoning behind what he's saying?!
Same. I always have to take a wild guess at what's okay for me to say and I've learned not to say anything that challenges their opinions at all in front of them
Same as well.
This is the reason I like my new youth pastor. He's really accepting and supportive and all that and has VERY different views than some. But we haven't really gotten to talking about being gay yet
I also love his wife and kids but that's another story
I had an amazing youth minister too, we never talked about being gay and stuff but he was hella chill and played the guitar and had the same energy as Dom but more hyperactive.
He's going into the seminary though so he left :(
I'm also terrified of what my dad would say if he found my post on Story Wars, so that kinda plays a part in why I'm partially inactive. If he thinks I'm not on it, he won't ask, right?
nervous laughter
God, while I still have this basically hatred for my dad's comments right now-
Why the fuck does he always has to make jokes/ straight up degrading trans people when he preaches?! It makes me so damn uncomfortable, and I have to fucking sit through it twice! I just want to throttle him sometimes!! I never feel safe enough to tell him something without him turning it into a lecture, and then he gets mad when I try to figure out the reasoning behind what he's saying?!
That really sucks dude. If you can’t talk to him about that he’s failed a little bit.
God, while I still have this basically hatred for my dad's comments right now-
Why the fuck does he always has to make jokes/ straight up degrading trans people when he preaches?! It makes me so damn uncomfortable, and I have to fucking sit through it twice! I just want to throttle him sometimes!! I never feel safe enough to tell him something without him turning it into a lecture, and then he gets mad when I try to figure out the reasoning behind what he's saying?!That really sucks dude. If you can’t talk to him about that he’s failed a little bit.
As a parent. He's failed as a parent.
Frankly speaking, it's a chest binder, and I use it to do exactly that; bind my chest. I may or may not be trans, I may or may not just have really low sensitivity to gender as a whole since I think all of this gender roles fuckery is absolute bullshit, I may or may not have dysmorphia of my chest (it's possible since I already have dysmorphia of my face). Whatever I may or may not be, that's eventually up to me to decipher.
The only sure thing I know is that when I wear it, I feel better about myself. And that's the only thing that matters for this.
I will say that I sympathize with (is dystrophia like dysphoria?) your issues and that you are the one in charge of what you do with your body and it’s no one else’s business.
Thank you, Dom. Dysmorphia is similar to dysphoria, but has nothing to do with feeling like the wrong gender/sex. For me, my dysmorphia makes me pick out every flaw until I no longer look human in my own eyes. I sometimes find myself just staring at my reflection, nitpicking every detail; my nose is too big, my lips too chapped, my eyes too small, my cheeks too chubby, my eyebrows too out of place, my teeth too yellow or white, my launch lines too odd, etc.
It is entirely possible that this feeling could be translated to the rest of my body, including my chest feeling too big or too small, or not shaped right.
I only ever learned I had it recently, since it's been written off as body issues or self-esteem issues, like it's a feeling I can cure by loving myself more. Unfortunately, it's not.
Don’t understand it but I pray you’ll find the help you need.
One time, I casually mentioned that one of my friends was sick that day when he was driving me home from middle school. He was quiet for a moment, then said "I don't want you to be friends with her anymore" and then lectured me the entire way home about why not??
And I've mentioned the not feeling safe talking to him, and that resulted in another lecture.
I'm just terrified to have kids because I don't want to make anyone go through this
I appreciate that, Dom. Thank you.
One time, I casually mentioned that one of my friends was sick that day when he was driving me home from middle school. He was quiet for a moment, then said "I don't want you to be friends with her anymore" and then lectured me the entire way home about why not??
And I've mentioned the not feeling safe talking to him, and that resulted in another lecture.I'm just terrified to have kids because I don't want to make anyone go through this
WHO MAKES THEIR KIDS NOT HAVE GOOD FRIENDSHIPS?????
I'M GONNA THROW SOMETHING
I appreciate that, Dom. Thank you.
Anytime mate.
WHO MAKES THEIR KIDS NOT HAVE GOOD FRIENDSHIPS?????
My "parents" lmao XDD
HE LITERALLY RUINED OUR FRIENDSHIP BY DRIVING UP TO HER HOUSE AND LECTURING HER ABOUT A GROUP ASSIGNMENT WE DID.
WE JUST MANAGED TO GET BACK TO BEING FRIENDS THIS YEAR (Sophmore this year, it was TWO YEAR AGO)
AND HE'S TRYING TO MCFUCKING DO IT AGAIN
DANG IT SPORK I'M NOW MAD ABOUT THE FRIENDSHIP THING lol
DANG IT SPORK I'M NOW MAD ABOUT THE FRIENDSHIP THING lol
Sorry. Hard to keep up when I literally don't have even one decent friend irl.
HE LITERALLY RUINED OUR FRIENDSHIP BY DRIVING UP TO HER HOUSE AND LECTURING HER ABOUT A GROUP ASSIGNMENT WE DID.
WE JUST MANAGED TO GET BACK TO BEING FRIENDS THIS YEAR (Sophmore this year, it was TWO YEAR AGO)AND HE'S TRYING TO MCFUCKING DO IT AGAIN
Oh god. Maybe just run away at this point.
Maybe don't now that I think about it. Maybe just lock yourself in the bathroom and he won't get you out.
HE LITERALLY RUINED OUR FRIENDSHIP BY DRIVING UP TO HER HOUSE AND LECTURING HER ABOUT A GROUP ASSIGNMENT WE DID.
WE JUST MANAGED TO GET BACK TO BEING FRIENDS THIS YEAR (Sophmore this year, it was TWO YEAR AGO)AND HE'S TRYING TO MCFUCKING DO IT AGAIN
Oh god. Maybe just run away at this point.
Maybe don't now that I think about it. Maybe just lock yourself in the bathroom and he won't get you out.
How about not thinking irrationally?
Tried once, he picked the lock and we are no longer allowed to lock the bathroom doors. Also, have thought about it (and had a bag ready) but I don't want that on my record.
ALSO- there is no such thing as privacy, my mother literally watched me shower a couple weeks ago cause they thought I wasn't bathing right