forum Don't Be Suspicious

Started March 01, 2019 by Deleted user

tune

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Well he's not wrong…

Love is a feeling though, when you look at someone and you don't feel that spark or flutter deep within you anymore then the love you once felt has gone away. It's not a bad thing. Not at all. It happens to the best of couples. Many that divorce still care for each other and remain amicable, but the love changed.
Just because you marry someone doesn't mean that you are bound to them for eternity. It's a promise to share that point in life together as a single unit. Should that time together come to an end it is okay, no one failed, it just changed.

I know.
I'm so proud of my dad

Love is something you act on not an action itself.

Both my parents are previously divorced. They then found each other. They sometimes threaten divorce, but they have been together for well over a decade, longer than their previous marriages.

Well, I believe that marriage should be saved for the person you wish to spend the rest of eternity with and that they should, indeed, be bound together, but I'm not very educated on this subject and could be wrong.

Good afternoon :)
I'm home from schoooool
So, in my opinion:

• Murder is always wrong. I understand some people's motives, but in the end murder is murder and is terrible.
• Adultery is a sin and should never happen, no matter how toxic the relationship.
• Perfect families do not exist; When you think someone has a perfect family, you haven't seen the half of it.
  Just my opinions my dudes

Love is a feeling though, when you look at someone and you don't feel that spark or flutter deep within you anymore then the love you once felt has gone away. It's not a bad thing. Not at all. It happens to the best of couples. Many that divorce still care for each other and remain amicable, but the love changed.
Just because you marry someone doesn't mean that you are bound to them for eternity. It's a promise to share that point in life together as a single unit. Should that time together come to an end it is okay, no one failed, it just changed.

You are wrong. Would you like to say you are only speaking in terms of romantic love before I continue?

um… I think Eris was very clear in what she meant.

As do I. But I think she is wrong.

O o f

Well, I believe that marriage should be saved for the person you wish to spend the rest of eternity with and that they should, indeed, be bound together, but I'm not very educated on this subject and could be wrong.

Can you please stop saying this? If you have an opinion just say it. Jezz. It doesn't matter is you're wrong. It's the discussion part that's important.

(and it's starting to annoy me that you punctuate your sentences with this.)

Love is a feeling though, when you look at someone and you don't feel that spark or flutter deep within you anymore then the love you once felt has gone away. It's not a bad thing. Not at all. It happens to the best of couples. Many that divorce still care for each other and remain amicable, but the love changed.
Just because you marry someone doesn't mean that you are bound to them for eternity. It's a promise to share that point in life together as a single unit. Should that time together come to an end it is okay, no one failed, it just changed.

You are wrong. Would you like to say you are only speaking in terms of romantic love before I continue?

I'm not wrong.

Well, I believe that marriage should be saved for the person you wish to spend the rest of eternity with and that they should, indeed, be bound together, but I'm not very educated on this subject and could be wrong.

Can you please stop saying this? If you have an opinion just say it. Jezz. It doesn't matter is you're wrong. It's the discussion part that's important.

(and it's starting to annoy me that you punctuate your sentences with this.)

Alright.

I think it's perfectly fine that not just Ella, but anyone who does it is able to admit that they don't know all sides/all the information on a subject.

Great! Thank you. Just remember that how you feel about a subject is never wrong. If you feel that you don't have enough juice to discuss then educate yourself. :) Simple as pie

I think it's perfectly fine that not just Ella, but anyone who does it is able to admit that they don't know all sides/all the information on a subject.

That's not what I had a problem with. She says this about her opinions, which aren't wrong because that's how she feels. So she shouldn't be saying that, it demeans her point, which she should stand by because it's important to her

I… I… um…

I would have said the same thing to anyone else.

Love is a feeling though, when you look at someone and you don't feel that spark or flutter deep within you anymore then the love you once felt has gone away. It's not a bad thing. Not at all. It happens to the best of couples. Many that divorce still care for each other and remain amicable, but the love changed.
Just because you marry someone doesn't mean that you are bound to them for eternity. It's a promise to share that point in life together as a single unit. Should that time together come to an end it is okay, no one failed, it just changed.

You are wrong. Would you like to say you are only speaking in terms of romantic love before I continue?

I'm not wrong.

Love is not exactly a feeling. The feeling is attraction. Love is the bond you make. There are people that I love that I feel like ignoring sometimes so your statement is incorrect. It is a bad thing. Sure some people actually manage to divorce peacefully. But most of the time it isn't. And it also can do irreparable damage to the children involved.
Unless you swear "till death do us part" except for that.

Love is a feeling though, when you look at someone and you don't feel that spark or flutter deep within you anymore then the love you once felt has gone away. It's not a bad thing. Not at all. It happens to the best of couples. Many that divorce still care for each other and remain amicable, but the love changed.
Just because you marry someone doesn't mean that you are bound to them for eternity. It's a promise to share that point in life together as a single unit. Should that time together come to an end it is okay, no one failed, it just changed.

You are wrong. Would you like to say you are only speaking in terms of romantic love before I continue?

I'm not wrong.

Love is not exactly a feeling. The feeling is attraction. Love is the bond you make. There are people that I love that I feel like ignoring sometimes so your statement is incorrect. It is a bad thing. Sure some people actually manage to divorce peacefully. But most of the time it isn't. And it also can do irreparable damage to the children involved.
Unless you swear "till death do us part" except for that.

I'm going to have to agree with Eris on this one. I think she's right in saying that love is a feeling, and not an action in itself.

Okay, you've mentioned it doing damage on the kids thing a couple times, and that could be true, but there are cases where it's not?

My father/sperm donor was an abusive dick. He treated my mom like shit, and was just all around horrible. I've got my issues because of that already, but if my mom hadn't left him, it would be even worse. Kids shouldn't, first of all, grow up watching their parents fight because they aren't in love anymore, because it can do a number on a kid. Second, do you want kids growing up thinking that their parent's relationship is okay, when it's toxic or just loveless? They'll grow up thinking that's normal, and could end up in a relationship just the same as their parent's.

And enough about the kids now, what about the mental, and even physical health of the parties involved? The couple themselves? Are you saying that women or men in abusive relationships, or just loveless relationships, shouldn't leave, shouldn't try to find a healthy one? Sometimes people make bad decisions, or they're pressured into a marriage too soon by family and friends, or even their own spouse.

Have you been in love with someone? Felt that you had a core made up of storm clouds every time they were gone? Felt the warm comfort of just being in their presence, not doing anything but just being? Felt the extreme mental and physical duress when it is time to let them go for whatever reason?

That is love. Love is a million tiny feelings that you don't even notice. Love is recognizing that this person is apart of you no matter if you don't end up together or if you do. Love is being able to breathe for the first time because they hugged you. (literally how I feel every time I see my mom.) Love is feeling that the world got a little brighter because they smiled or said something outrageous that will make you laught for ages. (How I feel when I see my siblings.) Love is talking for hours into the night because neither of you can sleep because you drank too much but nothing is holding you back from opening up, even if they say they won't judge you, they do and you love them for it. (My best friend and I.) Love is as easy as breathing but also as hard as travelling space. Love is not attraction. Sure you feel giddy and flushed when you first realize that you're into someone but that is infatuation, love is deeper. Love isn't fickle. Love isn't just romantic.

You can be deeply in love with someone and still want your own time and space, because you are still an individual within the couple. You still need to give yourself time to grow and mature and change. You still need to be your own human.

My statement is not wrong. You just don't understand what love is. Love is the only thing in the world that isn't logical. Spock would agree.

Divorce isn't pretty I agree on that, but the damage isn't irreparable to anyone. It's those that get stuck on what was lost that don't have the ability to move on and regrow and find more love. I wasn't damaged forever because my parents got divorced. My dad hurt me on his own, not because my mom left his asshole. My stepdad brought more into my life than anyone else ever could. I have more love in my life because of him. People aren't ruined by divorce, especially not children. That is ridiculous. They may not understand at first, but have you ever seen a kid get upset at having 2 christmases? Kids understand that nothing about their parents love for them will change. It's later on and individual pain that changes them, not the actual divorce.

Just because you marry someone doesn't mean that you are bound to them for eternity. It's a promise to share that point in life together as a single unit. Should that time together come to an end it is okay, no one failed, it just changed.

Okay, you've mentioned it doing damage on the kids thing a couple times, and that could be true, but there are cases where it's not?

My father/sperm donor was an abusive dick. He treated my mom like shit, and was just all around horrible. I've got my issues because of that already, but if my mom hadn't left him, it would be even worse. Kids shouldn't, first of all, grow up watching their parents fight because they aren't in love anymore, because it can do a number on a kid. Second, do you want kids growing up thinking that their parent's relationship is okay, when it's toxic or just loveless? They'll grow up thinking that's normal, and could end up in a relationship just the same as their parent's.

And enough about the kids now, what about the mental, and even physical health of the parties involved? The couple themselves? Are you saying that women or men in abusive relationships, or just loveless relationships, shouldn't leave, shouldn't try to find a healthy one? Sometimes people make bad decisions, or they're pressured into a marriage too soon by family and friends, or even their own spouse.

Oh it is true. But I don't have anything with me to cite write now.

Well abusiveness is different obviously. But then divorce from that is a lesser evil. Not a good.
Well that is the fault of the parents. I have experience with this. As do the people I learned this from. My parents, who know a lot about marriage and love and have been through some rough crap.
No. But it's statistically better for the children to be in a two parent home unless there is actual abuse.

No. No. Not "enough about the kids". This is the main problem with the pro divorce stance. The parents are put before the children. That is wrong. Kids are innocent members of dysfunction. It's not their fault. They are owed things. They have rights. One of those is to be put before the wishes of their parents because they have no oher way to live.
The other things I addresses above.

Have you been in love with someone? Felt that you had a core made up of storm clouds every time they were gone? Felt the warm comfort of just being in their presence, not doing anything but just being? Felt the extreme mental and physical duress when it is time to let them go for whatever reason?

Indeed I have.

That is love. Love is a million tiny feelings that you don't even notice. Love is recognizing that this person is apart of you no matter if you don't end up together or if you do. Love is being able to breathe for the first time because they hugged you. (literally how I feel every time I see my mom.) Love is feeling that the world got a little brighter because they smiled or said something outrageous that will make you laugh for ages. (How I feel when I see my siblings.) Love is talking for hours into the night because neither of you can sleep because you drank too much but nothing is holding you back from opening up, even if they say they won't judge you, they do and you love them for it. (My best friend and I.) Love is as easy as breathing but also as hard as travelling space. Love is not attraction. Sure you feel giddy and flushed when you first realize that you're into someone but that is infatuation, love is deeper. Love isn't fickle. Love isn't just romantic.

And all those things are wonderful. But if you do not get the feeling do you not love? I would disagree.

You can be deeply in love with someone and still want your own time and space, because you are still an individual within the couple. You still need to give yourself time to grow and mature and change. You still need to be your own human.

I agree. But neither of us knows the inner workings of marriage.

My statement is not wrong. You just don't understand what love is. Love is the only thing in the world that isn't logical. Spock would agree.

I'm not letting Spock win the argument this time. Maybe it is you who does not understand what love is. Who can tell?

Divorce isn't pretty I agree on that, but the damage isn't irreparable to anyone. It's those that get stuck on what was lost that don't have the ability to move on and regrow and find more love. I wasn't damaged forever because my parents got divorced. My dad hurt me on his own, not because my mom left his asshole. My stepdad brought more into my life than anyone else ever could. I have more love in my life because of him. People aren't ruined by divorce, especially not children. That is ridiculous. They may not understand at first, but have you ever seen a kid get upset at having 2 christmases? Kids understand that nothing about their parents love for them will change. It's later on and individual pain that changes them, not the actual divorce.

**I have read studies that say otherwise from the mouths of the children of divorce. **

Just because you marry someone doesn't mean that you are bound to them for eternity. It's a promise to share that point in life together as a single unit. Should that time together come to an end it is okay, no one failed, it just changed.

Unless you swore otherwise.