Tell Me Stuff You Heard High/Middle School Students Say!

"He's gay!" (No idea what the context, I just heard that shouted randomly.)

"I am the chicken-nugget prince!" (Also no idea what the context.)

@That One Walmart Spiderman

"If you break my knee I won't talk to you."
"Well if I break your knee i'll sue you"

@basil_

"If you kill me i'll sue you!"

@Becfromthedead

"Let's just cross the street. If they hit me, they'll have to pay for my college."

@CharBar

"Not to be gay or anything but there a few boys here who need my help."
-the only openly gay student in our class

Student: "You know what? I can stay quiet for the entire class, you losers."
Teacher: "y'all here that? Someone get a timer lets go."
Student: * starts silent streak *
ENTIRE CLASS: starts screaming mexican food names incorrectly to make kid triggered

Deleted user

Me: Staring into space as my friend approaches
Friend: Hey, you okay?
Me: Oh sorry, I thought you were a potato for a moment.

@thehobbit

(I literally have a list of 267 things that I heard high schoolers say, its in a literal google document that I have. I printed it out and gave a copy of it to like five of my friends as a parting gift because I was graduating and they were a year younger than me and they were the ones who had contributed to the list the most.)

@ravens

"PASTOR KENT IS THE SHIT!"

@HighPockets

Student, to a random kid: You're her son!
Teacher: I don't even have a son?
Student, to the same kid: You're her daughter!

Teacher: I feel like he have to check in on his socks every day.

Me, sarcastically: I love math.
Kid: I love meth.
Me: What?
Kid: Did I just say that out loud?!

Kid: I'LL KARATE CHOP YOUR LEG!
Kid 2: Please don't.

Teacher: Time to see who the superior Burger Boys is…..

Me: Romeo, Romeo! Thou needeth to chill, Romeo.

Me, standing on a chair: IN THIS ESSAY I WILL PROVE TO YOU THAT HAMLET, FRESH PRINCE OF DENMARK, IS NOT STRAIGHT!

Kid: In 100 years people are gonna be looking around and find a surreal meme. What the fuck will they think when they see a post captioned 'egg'? Just….'egg'…..

Kid: IT'S YOUR NEIGHBOR'S BIRTHDAY AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN GET HIM A PRESIDENT?

@Moxie

Teacher: I'm gonna throw this computer out the window.
Student: Do it you wont!
Students: Do it you wont!
Student: Do it you wont!
Students: Do it you wont!
Student: Do it you wont!
Students: Do it you wont!
Student: Do it you wont!
Students: Do it you wont!

@CharBar

"CHARLOTTE FEED THE REINDEER!"

@InstaOnly

(Context: There's an ice cream truck that only comes in the winter for some reason.)
Creepy ice cream van tune starts playing down the street
Kid: IT'S THE CREEPY ICE CREAM VAN! WINTER IS HERE.
Kid 2: CREEPY ICE CREAM VAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNN.
Kid 3: Do you buy from the van?
Kid: No, but it's the winter creepy ice cream van.

@Wry_Wyvern

"I kinda feel bad for Prince Escalus. He's one of the only sensible people in the play, and he has to be responsible for all those other assholes."

"Tybalt is the sauciest boi."

"Why does everyone have to die at the end??"
"Wait; everyone dies?"
"Well, all the best characters. And Romeo and Juliet; they die too."

@Kanaroli

"Wait George Washington was a general before the revolutionary war?!"

@HighPockets

Friend: "Please stop looking sexually at my pizza, it's not a lesbian."

Random kid: "Use heelies to escape your feelies."

Me: "STAB HIM!"

Me: "ANATOLE IS HOT! HE SPENDS HIS MONEY ON WOMEN AND WINE!"
Librarian, just walking by: "HE SPENDS HIS MONEY ON WOMEN AND WINE!"

Me, multiple times: "WE STAN A QUEEN!"

@Leiko