forum Share things nobody asked you to share

Started June 15, 2020 by @Knight-Shives group

tune

Good luck, Winter.

So today I was crying because my mother gave us a very small warning before announcing we were going to have pictures taken and I have a really really low body image and self esteem and I need to either be dressing up as like a fantasy person or something or I need a week to mentally prep myself before I can have actual pictures of me taken in order to not freak out. So the hour or two we were given to prep was stent with me frantically trying to think of something to wear with freaking out and panicking resulting in many many tears and then my face was red and my eye's were swollen from crying and then it's picture time and I'm just miserable and freaking out and in a hoodie and sweat pants still.
And the entire time Mom's acting as if everything is fine and It's the worst and then she got mad at me because she asked if we could all move to a different location and I said No, I'm done. So she got mad but like, why ask if you don't want the answer. So she tried to guilt trip me which just resulted in me crying again.
And then after it's all over she was like "Relsey, Why did you ruin all of our pictures by glaring, Pictures are really important to me I really enjoy having something to look at and you just didn't think about my needs and wants and were just focusing on yourself." Like, number one My eye's are nearly swollen shut, I wasn't glaring that's just what my face looks like right now, Two, I'm the one being selfish and not thinking about your needs? Last I checked I was the one in the middle of a break down who was being ignored. Yes one of us here wasn't taking other people's needs into consideration when they should have been but it wasn't me.

Any way that's the story of why my Mom isn't talking to me right now and also why I am not the slightest bit upset by it. It's actually probably the best thing she's done all year.

I know I'm supposed to be in radio dark mode, to hide from my father, but Rels, my Pms are always open, and if you have the urge or you need to talk to someone, I can zoom if you feel like it. It's your choice, and whatever you decide, I will support your decision. Now Imma go back into radio dark mode bc I can't let my dad find my phone or me anywhere near it. I love you all, and I'll be back real soon.

Glad to see you're back :)

I'm not sure how to respond to that Rels….

We'll be waiting here with open hearts, minds, and arms when you do return Winter!

My dad just asked me if video stores were still a thing….

Uhhhh, yes and no. Family Video still exists, but other than that, the answer is no; everything is mostly streamed online or on dvd now.

Okay.

RIP Blockbuster, we still have stuff in our basement from when my dad used to work there

I'm crying

Hah.

Y'all I'm having a dilemma and a crisis as a writer pls send halp (':

What do you need help with?

What do you need help with?

I found a FANFICTION in my middle school dropbox last night. A Harry Potter fanfiction. And after much, much internal conflict I opened it and read it. And I do remember writing some of it now (That was a hot second ago so it's kinda fuzzy- I used to write everything in purple apparently.) And it's admittedly pretty bad- the character development is rushed, the plot is going a million directions, literally every character is low-key a Mary- Sue, but like. I LOVED the concept??/ And I had an outline for how the story was supposed to go and it was so GOOD and I kinda want to finish it?????

I don't write fanfiction thoooo. Literally this is the only one I've ever written (probably, I rlly need to sort through my old stories) and I don't know how to feel about writing it as a more experienced writer now??? Like, I couldn't ever DO anything with it, and the concepts were originally my idea but the story itself isn't so I could never show it to anyone, but???????
I don't knowww.

Also I misused the phrase 'WHEN SUDDENLY,' so much I kinda want to backhand my eighth-grade self >.<

Oof. Not sure how I could help.

Yeahhh I don't know either 😔

Realizing my scoliosis probably made me a bit shorter than I could have ended up being. I’m currently 5’10” so fairly tall but still…
I’m also still wondering what sort of treatment I’ll get for it. Since I don’t know how major of a curve it is or if it’s staying the same/getting worse (I think it’s getting worse).
I wouldn’t mind getting surgery for it, I’ve heard it limits movement to a small degree but I’m also not going to immediately suggest going for it. I have seen a good number of people say that while they were nervous for it, it changed their life for the better

It wouldn’t be my first surgery but definitely a major one (my only other surgery was my tooth one which I was out for and got to experience waking up from it, feeling ‘fine’, then on the ride home I began to get a headache.)
I’m just gonna wait to see what the doctor says when I eventually see them. Oh - another thing COVID delayed, my scoliosis appointment. That was supposed to happen in September. Good thing it didn’t though given it was up in the Toronto area

I spent an hour yesterday crying over a plushie, I lack the motivation to watch One Piece, I've been wearing the same shirt since Friday and every time I cough I taste blood in the back of my throat so anyway how are you guys

Bro are you okay.

Also I've just discovered that I apparently wrote a Harry Potter fanfiction at some point in my life. I just discovered it in the dark corners of my middle school Dropbox.
Dare I open it. I am afraid XD

Yes definitely. And share.

it doesn't help that I'm unattractive to begin with.

Are you though? Have we seen your face yet?

But anyways, if your mother not talking to you is something you see as good, I'm glad it's happening. 👍

Same though. Good luck, Rels.

What do you need help with?

I LOVED the concept??/ And I had an outline for how the story was supposed to go and it was so GOOD and I kinda want to finish it?????
I don't write fanfiction thoooo. Literally this is the only one I've ever written (probably, I rlly need to sort through my old stories) and I don't know how to feel about writing it as a more experienced writer now??? Like, I couldn't ever DO anything with it, and the concepts were originally my idea but the story itself isn't so I could never show it to anyone, but???????
I don't knowww.

Let it marinate for a month or so. Then use all of the good in it to write an original story.

it doesn't help that I'm unattractive to begin with.

Are you though? Have we seen your face yet?

Well, no.

Still. You probably aren’t.

I spent an hour yesterday crying over a plushie, I lack the motivation to watch One Piece, I've been wearing the same shirt since Friday and every time I cough I taste blood in the back of my throat so anyway how are you guys

Bro are you okay.

Absolutely vibing now, just really bored

I spent an hour yesterday crying over a plushie, I lack the motivation to watch One Piece, I've been wearing the same shirt since Friday and every time I cough I taste blood in the back of my throat so anyway how are you guys

Bro are you okay.

Absolutely vibing now, just really bored

I take that back there's 5 days until Christmas and I have oneshots to write

Good luck.

What do you need help with?

I LOVED the concept??/ And I had an outline for how the story was supposed to go and it was so GOOD and I kinda want to finish it?????
I don't write fanfiction thoooo. Literally this is the only one I've ever written (probably, I rlly need to sort through my old stories) and I don't know how to feel about writing it as a more experienced writer now??? Like, I couldn't ever DO anything with it, and the concepts were originally my idea but the story itself isn't so I could never show it to anyone, but???????
I don't knowww.

Let it marinate for a month or so. Then use all of the good in it to write an original story.

Probably what I'll end up doing. Also I'm lowkey impressed by my Kefi 1.0 self. Like, don't get me wrong, wasn't a great writer, but I apparently started the love for making constant references to mythology very, very young.