Acyn: What comes before anything? What have I always said is the most important thing?
Will: Breakfast.
Ilaria: Family.
Will: Family, right. I thought you meant of the things you eat.
_
Gaia: I've got a five year plan.
Kenna: Cool, I've got the next two and a half hours planned, and then, there's darkness.
_
Acyn: Caspian, please look me straight in the eyes and tell me the truth.
Caspian: You know I can't look at those eyes and be straight.
_
Kenna: Caspian will never agree to this plan.
Acyn: Sure he will!
Kenna: I've already asked him three times, he won't do it.
Acyn: Let me try.
Acyn: [Walks up to Caspian]
Acyn: Can we-
Caspian: Yes.
_
Tanith: Hey, Caspian, this is Gaia. She's my girlfriend.
Gaia: Hi.
Caspian: You couldn't find anyone better?
Tanith: Cas! Don't say that in front of her, that's rude.
Caspian: I was talking to her, actually.
_
Verena: Who broke the coffee pot? I'm not mad, I just want to know.
The Elite:
Acyn: I did it, I broke it.
Verena: No. No, you didn't. Kenna?
Kenna: Don't look at me, look at Eira.
Eira: What? I didn't break it.
Kenna: Huh, that's weird, how did you even know it was broken.
Eira: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken!
Kenna: Suspiscious.
Eira: No, it's not!
Caspian: If it matters, probably not, Will was the last person to use it.
Will: Liar! I don't even drink that crap.
Caspian: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Will: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles, everyone knows that, Caspian!
Acyn: Okay, let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Verena.
Verena: No! Who broke it?
Eira: Dimitri has been awfully quiet.
Dimitri: Really? Oh my god!
The Elite: [Everyone screaming at each other, a few punches being thrown, chaos]
Verena to Sorin: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict 10 minutes from now they'll all be at each others throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.
Sorin: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
_
Caspian: Where's Acyn?
Will: Well, he's small. He's probably under something.
_
Nakoa: WHAT DID YOU DO?
Orlaith: I SHAVED MY EYEBROWS!
Nakao: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?
Orlaith: I DON'T KNOW!
_
Kenna: Good morning, the gods have let me live another day and I'm about to make that everybody else's problem.
_
Caspian: It's dangerous to go alone, take this-
Acyn: You're just holding out your empty hand?
Caspian: Exactly-
_
Nakoa after saving Kenna's life: Are you alright?
Kenna: Yeah, I think so.
Nakoa: WELL YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE, WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!
_
Ilaria: You ever think about how your skeleton is always wet?
Dimitri: I wish I never had, but thanks for ruining my life.
Ilaria: Don't worry! There will come a time where it isn't!
Dimitri: Thanks! Even worse!
_
Verena: I cannot believe I have to care for this stupid team of emotionally damaged, traumatized, impulsive, and dangerous teenagers.
Literally everyone: You don't have to. Actually, it would be better if you didn't.
Verena, rolling up her sleeves: No, I'm gonna.
_
Kenna: For the last mission, I had to go undercover.
Kenna: To make sure I wasn't recognized, I had to wear something so drab and uninspired-
Nakoa: Why do I feel like this is going to be a dig at me.
Kenna: I wore Nakoa's clothes.
Nakoa: There it is.
_
Verena: Oh, Acyn did the dishes.
Kenna: How do you know I didn't do them?
Verena: Because once when all the kitchen knives were dirty, I saw you slice a piece of bread with one of Eira's axes.
_
Kenna: I wasn't that drunk.
Dimitri: You came downstairs saying you were "dressed to impress".
Kenna: What was I wearing?
Dimitri: Nothing.
_
Kenna: Oh! Here's my award for best assassin and heir to the throne!
Nakoa: Kenna, that's an angry letter from the Winterbourne court asking you to please just turn yourself into the authorities because they literally cannot deal with your bullshit anymore.
Kenna:… well it says 'most' so I'm calling it an award.
_
Kenna: I'm invoking the "No Judgements" clause of our friendship.
Dimitri: What did you do.
_
Acyn and Caspian: [Having a steamy, romantic shower together]
Will: [pulls back the shower curtains]
Will: Are we- stop screaming, it's just me, are we out of chocolate?
_
Literally any of the Elite having a stupid and dangerous idea
Acyn: [Waking up in a cold sweat]
Acyn: Something is wrong.
_
Will: [Gets down on one knee]
Keres, tearing up: Oh my god, it's finally happening.
Will: [Ties shoelaces]
Keres: He finally stopped wearing crocs-
_
Will: I've decided to see Keres's threat against my life as her flirting.
Acyn: How are you still alive?
_
Kenna: Why are all my underwear in the freezer?
Dimitri: You said, "this is going to confuse me so much tomorrow" and put them in. Apparently drunk you likes to play pranks on sober you.
Kenna:
Kenna: That explains so much.
_
Will: Ouch, my armkle.
Caspian: Your what?
Acyn: His wrist.
_
Will: Are you ready to commit?
Keres:
Keres: Like… a crime or a relationship?
_
Will: I don't care what anyone says, the black cookie part is the best part of an oreo.
Asteria: Dark without light is an abyss, light without dark is blinding. You cannot have a coin with one side.
Will, visibly confused: Yo, socrates, it's a fucking cookie.
_
Will: [peeling a banana] May I take your jacket, lol.
Caspian: Do you think other people can't hear you?
_
Kenna after Dimitri died: Stop asking me how everything is going. I don't know, I'm ignoring it.
_
Will: No, you hang up first!
Will:
Will: Keres?
Will:
Will: Hello?
_
Will: [counting on his fingers]
Keres: I just asked how old you were…
Will: Can you just shut the fuck up for a second.
_
Eira: How come you have been abnormally nice to me?
Kenna: What do you mean?
Eira: You just seem nicer than usual.
Kenna: I can hit you if you want.
