Incorrect Quotes 2: Electric Boogaloo

((~~two of those are actual quotes from me~~))

@GameMaster

Isaac: Amara, truth or dare?
Amara: Truth
Isaac: What’s your credit card number?

Amara, watching Jolene practice fencing: Women with swords, what an excellent way to remember you’re gay
or
Alec, watching Marco boxing shirtless: mmm, what an excellent way to remember you’re gay

Law: Hey, want me to do a tarot reading for you?
Luffy: sure!
Law: Laying down cards Alright, this one tells me you're a precious angel, this one says your smile is heavenly, this one–
Luffy: Wait, these are just my wanted posters.
Law: my point still stands.

@Starfast

Dallas: You’re Canadian?
Ara: Yes, that’s where I was born.
Dallas You don’t act Canadian
Ara: Oh, sorry. Let me drink and entire bottle of maple syrup and play hockey.
~~I love how that last line starts with "Oh sorry."~~

Ara: I think you're still suffering from the effects of the party last night.
Andor: But I only drank Redbull!
Ara: How many?
Andor: … Eighteen

Crispin: No pain, no gain!
Gerard: But I'm in constant pain and I've lost everything-

Ara: I would like to make a toast.
Ara, raising his glass: I cannot believe we have gone through another 12 months of absolute fuckery.
Ara: Cheers!

Dallas: This is so cool! When can I meet the rest of the band?
Holly: Uh. Heads up, the rest of the band is….
Holly: I'm trying to find the right words to prepare you and all I can come up with is 'dumpster fire'.

Kit: Adelia, are you and Gerard dating?
Adelia, with Gerard's head in her lap: What gives you that impression?

Holly: I'm what the Victorians would call a "vile, ill-tempered and thoroughly wretched little creature."

Holly: Brian, truth or dare?
Brian: truth?
Holly: what's your credit card number

@ElderGodSeeba bing bing 🐸

Wynne: you're Japanese?
Uno: yup!
Wynne: you don't seem Japanese
Uno: ???What do you want me to do??? Lose world war II again???

@ElderGodSeeba bing bing 🐸

Holly: I'm what the Victorians would call a "vile, ill-tempered and thoroughly wretched little creature."

As someone named Holly myself, this shit hits hard

@SpookyScarySnoteleks

Zoro: You're from Aquin?
Azami: Yeah, I was born there.
Zoro: You don't act like it.
Azami: Oh, sorry. Lemme just get wiped out by a hurricane.

@HighPockets

Samuel: You’re from Creston?
Nich: Yeah, that’s where I was born.
Samuel: You don’t act like you're from Creston.
Nich: Oh, sorry. Let me go see some plays and get murdered by the mob.

The Erl King: No pain, no gain!
Oleander: But I'm in constant pain and lost everything…

Ophelia: This is so cool! When can I meet the rest of your friends?
Trinity: Uh. Heads up, the rest of my friends are….
Trinity: I'm trying to find the right words to prepare you and all I can come up with is 'a dumpster fire'.

Kate: I'm what the Victorians would call a "vile, ill-tempered and thoroughly wretched little creature."

@HighPockets

Nich: Darius, truth or dare?
Darius: Truth?
Nich: What's your credit card number?

@ccb

callie: this is so cool! when can i meet the rest of your friends?
august: uh. heads up, the rest of my friends are….
august: i'm trying to find the right words to prepare you and all i can come up with is 'a dumpster fire'
–
august: i think you're still suffering from the effects of the party last night.
christelle: but I only drank redbull!
august: how many?
christelle: …eighteen

@threesacult

Jack: I think I'm in love with Emmett.
Cyrus: Congratulations! You are officially the last person to know.

Cyrus: Anthony, truth or dare?
Anthony: Truth?
Cyrus: What's your credit card number?

Anthony: I would like to make a toast.
Anthony, raising his glass: I cannot believe we have gone through another 12 months of this absolute fuckery.
Anthony: Cheers!

@knightinadream

Seokju: [tapping on the counter]
Adrian: [tapping back furiously]
Jaesung: What are they doing?
Matthew: Seokju and Adrian learned morse code so they could talk shit without us knowing.
Seokju: .-.. — … . .-.
Adrian, out loud: SAY IT TO MY FACE, COWARD!
Jaesung: They sound happy.

Jungwoo: Am I adopted?
Elijah: No, you're Jungwoo. Why would anyone name you "adopted"? Even if we wanted to, your name was already Jungwoo when we adopted you.

Khyung: Whoever makes Astra fall alseep will win 100 dollars.
Kimmie, holding a frying pan: Where is she?

Hyungwon: Okay guys, please refrain from cursing around Chansung. I think by swearing, you're setting up a bad example for him which is why-
Jack, walking into the room with Chansung following him: Here comes the bad bitch club!

@HighPockets

Ophelia: Am I adopted?
Liene: No, you're Ophelia. Why would anyone name you "adopted"? Even if your parents wanted to, your name was already Ophelia when they adopted you.

Trinity: Okay guys, please refrain from cursing around Jack. I think by swearing, you're setting up a bad example for him which is why-
Carter, walking into the room with Jack following him: Here comes the bad bitch club!

@Starfast

Keyla: What a horrible week.
Garzlan: It's only Monday.
Milo [walking into the room]: Hello everyone!
Garzlan: Oh my god what a horrible week.

Brian: [trips and falls on his face]
Holly [choking on her drink]: Brian!
Brian: What?
Holly: Don't do that while I'm drinking!

Andor: I do not think, therefore, I do not am.

Holly: I think I forgot something.
Jackie: if you forgot, it isn’t important.
Holly: yeah, you’re right.
Brian: *Standing at the Skytrain station waiting for Holly to pick him up*

Ara: If you found out that you only had one day left to live, what would you do with it.
Jackie: Say goodbye and mend my relationships.
Andor: Something illegal.
Dallas Accept my fate.
Holly: I would message ten people saying that if they don't forward the message to ten other people, I would die tomorrow.
Dallas: What?
Andor: That's fucking awesome. Can I change my answer?

Milo: I decided to kill off a few characters in the book I’m writing.
Milo It would definitely spice up my autobiography a little.

Crispin: Are you easily swayed by other people's opinions?
Caleb: …Yeah, I am.
Kit: No you're not.
Caleb: You're right, I'm not!

Andor: My fellow yees and haws I gathered you all here today because-
Ara: Please just explain the plan.

Gerard: Frank! Leo just called me the B-word!
Frank: Leo? Is this true?
Leo, to Gerard: Motherfucker doesn't start with a B.

Jackie: Whoever makes Brian fall alseep will win 100 dollars.
Holly, holding a frying pan: Where is he?

@SpookyScarySnoteleks

Azami, heavily drunk: I do not think, therefore, I do not am.

Peregrine, age 7: Am I adopted?
Shanks: No, you're Peregrine. Why would anyone name you "adopted"? Even if your mother wanted to, your name was already Peregrine when we adopted you.

@threesacult

Anthony: Whoever can make Cyrus fall asleep gets 100 dollars.
Jack, holding a frying pan: Where is she?

Emmett: Okay guys, please refrain from cursing around Quill. I think by swearing, you're setting up a bad example for her, which is why-
Cyrus, walking into the room with Quill following her: Here comes the bad bitch club!

Dally: I sort of did something and I need some advice, but I don't want a lot of judgment and criticism.
Jack: And you came to me?

Quill: Crushes are the worst.
Elias: Yeah. Whenever I'm around someone I have a crush on, I just act stupid.
Quill: But you’re always acting stupid.
Elias: Yeah.

Dally: Hey guys! Guess what I got?
Cyrus: A girlfriend?
Anthony: A real job?
Jack: A friend your age?
Dally: What? No, jeez, guys-

Karma: God, I’m so fucking clumsy today. I keep bumping into things. I have so many bruises, it’s not funny.
Cyrus, who broke into her room the day before to move all her furniture exactly 2 inches to the left: Oh, damn. That’s crazy.

Quill: Jack, what would you do if I came home with five adopted cats?
Jack:
Jack: What’s in the box?
Quill:
Jack: Quill

@SpookyScarySnoteleks

Jax: Captain, what would you do if I came home with five adopted cats?
Law:
Law: What’s in the box?
Jax:
Law: Jax

@HighPockets

Darlene: Whoever can make Louis fall asleep gets 100 dollars.
Trinity, holding a frying pan: Where is he?

Jack: Crushes are the worst.
Georgie: Yeah. Whenever I'm around someone I have a crush on, I just act stupid.
Jack: But you’re always acting stupid around me.
Georgie: Yeah.

Jackson: God, I’m so fucking clumsy today. I keep bumping into things. I have so many bruises, it’s not funny.
Geneva, who broke into his room the day before to move all his furniture exactly 2 inches to the left: Oh, damn. That’s crazy.

@HighPockets

Oberon: What a horrible week.
Titania: It's only Monday.
Oleander, walking into the room: Hello everyone!
Titania: What a horrible week.

Robin: I do not think, therefore, I do not am.

Henry: If you found out that you only had one day left to live, what would you do with it.
Victor: Say goodbye and mend my relationships.
Jackson: Something illegal.
Morgan: Accept my fate.
Geneva: I would message ten people saying that if they don't forward the message to ten other people, I would die tomorrow.
Henry: What?
Jackson: That's fucking awesome. Can I change my answer?

Oleander: I decided to kill off a few characters in the book I’m writing.
Oleander: It would definitely spice up my autobiography a little.

Robin: My fellow yees and haws, I gathered you all here today because-
Oberon: Please just explain the plan.

@croccin-champagne

rival team's member: finally, i've found you off the court. let's see who's really better, square up
lorelei, pulling out her phone: oh fuck you, hold on let me ask
lorelei: ai said no sorry

criminal: i'm going to kill you
mihael: hey ai this guy says he wants to kill me
ai: we have a game tomorrow
mihael: sorry man try again in two to three business days

police officer: you're under arrest for-
lyss: ai says if i miss dinner at the diner she'll break my fingers so i can't use knives, can i get a rain check?

thema, about to beat the shit out of someone on the other team: alright fucker-
gabe, grabbing her shirt: dude. ai said no more red cards
thema:….dammit

insert a million other similar situations where they somehow get out of things/can't do something because ai said no

@HighPockets

Enforcer: You're under arrest for-
Lyra: Trix says if I miss dinner at the diner she'll break my fingers so I can't use knives, can I get a rain check?

@ElderGod-kirky

Fan: How is same-sex marriage viewed where you're from?
Ryker: In Canada, we just call it marriage, and since it's not hockey, nobody really cares which team you're playing for :)

Kit: Does Canada even have a president or is it just whichever moose has the strongest antlers?
Alexis: Oh my actual gods
Ryker, walking by: I'm Canadian and I find this offensive. We elect the best maple tree to become president

Tess: Ah yes, the solar eclipse, that glorious event every few years when Apollo does something so incredibly stupid that Artemis has to yell at him in broad daylight in front of half of the world.
Kit: When you yell at your brother so hard that it makes the world go dark for several minutes
Alexis: This is my culture hOW DARE–
Tess & Kit: Don't act like it's not true. hive fives like they meant to talk at the same time

Random person in crowd w/ friend: …and THAT'S the bisexual agenda
Alexis walking by: What's the bisexual agenda?
Person: We were just joking around
Alexis: No, I'm bisexual. I want to know the agenda

Tess, stretching out on the ~~stolen~~ borrowed yacht: I'm about to get so tan you guys
Alexis without missing a beat: -Icarus's last words

Ryker: An ancient Greek walks into his tailor's shop with a pair of torn pants. "Euripides?" says the tailor. "Yeah, Eumenides?" replies the man
Alexis: This is so awful. It must go on to infect others

Rhydar: Accidentally stole a guy's wallet and when I returned it he gave me a thumbs down instead of the finger… I don't know why but it hurt more

Ryker's computer: I'm sorry, you need admin permission to install this
Ryker: Aren't we forgetting one teensy-weensy but ever-so-crucial little tiny detail?
Ryker: I OWN YOU!!

@HighPockets

Oscar: …and that's the queer agenda
Leda, walking by: What's the queer agenda?
Percy: We were just joking around
Leda: No, I'm queer. I want to know the agenda

Frankie: An ancient Greek walks into his tailor's shop with a pair of torn pants. "Euripides?" says the tailor. "Yeah, Eumenides?" replies the man
Barry: This is so awful. It must go on to infect others

Jackson: Accidentally stole a guy's wallet and when I returned it he gave me a thumbs down instead of the finger… I don't know why but it hurt more

@ElderGod-kirky

Incorrect Quotes God Addition

Let it begin

Devasi: I'm having salad for dinner
Devasi: Well, fruit salad
Devasi: Actually, it's mostly grapes
Devasi: Okay, it's all grapes
Devasi: Fermented grapes
Devasi:
Devasi: It's wine
Devasi: I'm having wine for dinner

Bann: Azara now has an axe
Shainet: This is ominous
Yurgri: This is great

Azara: Danger is my middle name
Andria: That's a lie
Andria: Your middle name is Cutie-Pie
Andria: boops her nose
Azara: fights a smile

Ver: All Fruit Loops are the same flavor
Heitrui:
Heitrui: yoU TAKE THAT BACK

Ife, letting Xankai put lipstick on them: Don't forget to blot
Xankai: What does that mean?
Ife: Like dab the excess off
Xankai: kisses Ife
Ife: Cute but not quite
~~there's a running bet between the gods on who will be the one to make Ife fall in love~~

Azara: It's so hot out
Jinx: Well maybe you shouldn't have worn all black
Azara: This is a summer shade of black

Zakarit: FOUR MONTHS–
Holduno: What's wrong with him?
Devasi, suppressing giggles: It's nothing really…
Zakarit: THAT'S HOW LONG YOU STOOD BY AND WATCHED ME WATER A FAKE PLANT!

Devasi: I have decided I am, in fact, a snack. It's just that no one's hungry
Bann, under his breath: I'm starving

Bandit, stroking Azara's hair: You're so tiny and adorable
Azara: I could kill you in your sleep
Bandit, with love in her eyes: I know, but you wouldn't!
Azara: defeated grumbling

Shainet, reading a fortune cookie (ha): If you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world stays the same
Yurgri, with a mouth full of takeout: Kill two
Devasi, chugging stale beer: Coward, kill ten

Orla, innocently: Ife, are you a boy or a girl?
Ife: I'm a god
Orla: Yes, but what's between your legs?
Ife: On a good day, Shainet
Orla, face beat red: nEVERMIND
Jinx and Rava: exchange bets in the background

Random man: You have saved me, oh great healer. I have a daughter, Eniola. I would wish her to be your wife
Luaye: gay fear

@Pickles