forum Quotes from the List of Completely Weird and Random Things We’ve Overheard… (About 15 quotes will be posted daily, and feel completely free to add your own!)

Started April 03, 2023 by @IamNOTachickenok

tune

"I will squeeze your head until it cracks like a watermelon."

• "Is that blood on that coat?"
  "Yeah. Cool, huh?"
  "No."
  "Don't worry. It's not mine."
  "Not your blood or not your coat?"
  "Yes and yes."

"You want that alive and squirmin'!"

i-

i-

I said that. It was regarding Klingon food. Klingons eat live worm-like creatures called racht. A thing you know now.

cutely dies

Your friends with a nerd who makes very bad jokes. Also, I said that to my mother and father. With no one else in the room.

¨anyone know where my ball went? i lost it at the park I think..¨

• "My body feels cold."
  "Eh, it's shutting down. Anyways, my point is-"

"HEY I HAS SOMETHING ABOUT BUTFLIES!! PLAGERISM!!!!!"

• "…and you can already see mad romanticle tension between them. You could cut it with a sword – or a tortilla. It was that obvious."

• "Imagine Sonic running around in a pair of Timbs."

• "I'm thinking, 'drinking this is going to give me WINGS,' man! And judging by the health risks? It just might!"

• "Next time you go to the hospital, stay there."

"They're tired little boys. Play through"

(i was in the car)
¨am i not nice??¨ ¨no you ANNOYING¨

“I don’t think your brain’s meant to be on fire, but I’m not a rocket scientist so what do I know?”

"Did u just inhale monty!?"

¨SOMONE GRAB THE DAMN BREAD ITS FLYING AWAY!¨

¨WTF IS SpArKlInG KETCHUP?¨

“But I have been rizzing him with gifts of pomegranate” - the human I decided to befriend (oops)

“But I have been rizzing him with gifts of pomegranate” - the human I decided to befriend (oops)

That was meant to be private /j

• "So I've made watermelon pizza before, but never like this. The difference is this one actually has barbecue sauce on top of it."
  "The what."

"CAN WE INHALE MONTY AGAIN SK WE DONT HAVE TO DEAL W HIM?"

¨SOMONE TOOK MY BALLS!¨ (the party goes silent) ¨oh.. nvm I found my balls¨

"MY TESTICALS!" "Zepplin would give you his as replacement but they got cut off in febuary"

"Hi fattie. STOP DROOLING ON ME YOU LITTLE SHIT"

"NO TWIRKING ON THE DOG" "IM DOING THE STANKY LEG!"

• "Bro looks like a western emo."

“Antioxidants are Fabuloso.” - bio teacher
“Cocomelon gives people autism.” - bio teacher again

And then a brief conversation between a classmate and my geo teacher

Geo teacher: “I like to rescue plants.”
Classmate: “Why don’t you rescue animals?”
Geo: “Because I don’t really care…”

(Geo teacher was like, half joking btw. She’s kind of terrible :))