Alec stumbled with the keys. He wasn't much of a catcher. "S-Sorry for leaving so early!" he bowed and then ran after Sasha. "S-Sasha wait…let me help you in the car." Alec took Shash's arm and helped him in, buckling his seat belt. He closed the door and got in on the driver's side."I-I'm sorry they teased y-you like that. Th-There's nothing wrong with o-our relationship." Alec looked over to Sasha and reached for his hair subconsciously.
Sasha looked over to him, his intense, arctic blue eyes piercing into Alec's greenish-blue ones. "Of course there's nothing wrong with the relationship," he snapped, "there's something wrong with me." He leaned forward and placed his face in his hands. "I'm just really sorry," he whispered, "you deserve so much better than me yet here you are. Stuck with me." His voice became very gossamer, if you didn't listen well enough you most likely wouldn't even hear it. His voice was slightly shaky and audibly close to breaking.
Alec placed his hand on his head and stroked his hair. "What you mean? Th-There's nothing wrong with you. I like being stuck with you. There is never a dull moment." He grinned. "Look at me. I deserve you in every way. You're understanding. You respect my boundaries. You also help me when I can't compose myself when meeting new people. You compliment me even when I look so discombobulated in the morning. So don't think any less of yourself. Let's go home okay?"
Tears slipped out from Sasha's eyes and his shaky breaths became more audible. He wanted to say 'yes' to going home, but his throat felt too tight to speak a word. Instead, all he could do was nod. He lifted his head from his hands and looked at Alec with a small smile. "Thank you for being here for me, Alec. I-" he paused for a moment, rethinking what he was going to say, "appreciate it," he finished, slowly.
"Always." Alec wiped his tears. He then turned on the car pressing the gas pedal. "Sasha could you not touch me as you did in the restaurant. It made me feel really uncomfortable." Alec asked of him. "I just don't like being touched that way."
"Of course! I'm still very sorry. I should've been able to control myself better," he said, looking away in both embarrassment and shame. He tapped his foot against the floor of the car lightly. He pondered a question, rolling it around in his head for a little while. After some time, he opened his mouth to say it, only to close it again and remain silent. There was a myriad of things that Sasha had wished to say, but none of them had managed to escape from behind his lips.
"You look like you want to say something else," Alec mumbled as he made a left turn. "Just say it. Your still drunk so you won't even remember it when you wake up tomorrow." Alec pressed the brake and sighed. "There's traffic…so we might be here for a while…" he looked out the window, wondering what Sasha was going to say. "Hey…when you drank because you were in love with your best friend, they didn't mean me right?"
Sasha shrugged. "Who knows who they were hinting at?" he dismissed, "I'm not them." He looked out the window at the traffic around them. He noticed the rain droplets against the window. They seemed to make every tail light brighter and every colour more vivid. Sasha began thinking out loud. "Everything's so much prettier in the rain," he said, his voice laced with dreams. At this point, all of Sasha's thought were spilling from his mouth. "Say, Alec. What do you think your life would've been like if we had never met?"
"I would be dead…" he sighed. "The day I met you I was planning to commit suicide. My parents weren't the nicest to me and my social anxiety. They would get mad easily because I wasn't looking them in the eyes or I was doing something to annoy them. They called me a mistake…" Alec's eyes started to get watery and vision, blurry. "They said that I'm the child they never wanted. Then my mom would go out and cheat on my dad. It was a different man every night. Even sometimes she would…." he choked on his words. "She would make me watch….Then when she would come home drunk she would apologize for the things she did to me. My dad, however, had left long before this happened. Now he has a happy family. I live with my mom to take care of her. She's better now as you've seen her. It was so bad that I didn't want to live in the world anymore. Then you came in and you saved me…I'm happy you came into my life." He was sobbing at this point. He tried to wipe away the tears, but they wouldn't stop.
Sasha's mouth was stuck open at that moment. He had hardly expected such an answer. In fact, he was so shocked but also relieved by the answer that he too started crying. Maybe he was just still emotional from earlier, but hearing those words made him lose it. "Alec," he whispered, "pull over the car so we're not blocking traffic." He had hardly an idea of what in the world he could do for Alec, but whatever it was, he had a feeling it was going to take some time.
Alec sniffled and pulled the car over. He put the car in park and rubbed his eyes. "I'm sorry, you had to see that break down. I-I never w-wanted you to know. I-If you did you would j-just start to hang out with me out o-off pity." Alec refused to look at Sasha. "I'm a mess I k-know." he laughed through his crying.
Sasha quickly unbuckled his seatbelt and leaped forward to hug Alec. "Milochka. I don't care how much of a mess you are," he whispered to Alec, stroking the other boy's soft hair. "I'm a mess too, we both know that. And you should also know that as much as I'm a kind person and would pity someone, I wouldn't hang out with them for pure pity." He pulled back and looked Alec in the eyes, his brown brows furrowed. "I find that to be cruel and I'd like to think that I'm not. Do you think that I am? Please be honest."
Alec shook his head. "You do get scary s-sometimes, b-but then you calm down…" Alec's tears fell onto Sasha's shirt. "I-I know you w-would never h-hurt me though…Why do you ask?" He looked up with tear stains on his cheek.
Scary. The word echoed in his mind. He smiled, cocking his head to the swing, his long hair following suit. "No reason," he chirped, "don't worry about it." He looked over at the road, the traffic had cleared significantly. "Why don't we continue heading home?" he suggested, already putting back on his seatbelt.
Alec sniffled and wiped his eyes. When he sat back in his seat his hands gripped the wheel. He took a deep breath before quickly kissing Sasha's cheek. "Thank you..for being with me." His grin was natural and it felt good. Alec's eyes widened. "I-I-I didn't mean to kiss you I swear-I mean I did-I mean it just happened I mean…I'm sorry…" Alec flailed his hands around in panic. "Don't be mad…"
Sasha blinked in surprise at the kiss. He couldn't quite say it was something he was opposed to. "Oh- uhh, it's alright I'm not mad," he said, slightly laughing at the way Alec flailed his hands. A single thought crossed his mind at the moment, his lips slightly parted as if he were about to say it. But of course, he wasn't. Instead, he just looked down at his shoes, a slight blush creeping up to his ears. Thankfully for Sasha, they were covered by his hair. "Let's just get home, okay?"
"Y-Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Can I-Can I stay at yours tonight?" Alec put the car into drive and got back on the highway. He was tapping his fingers and biting his lip. "Y-You don't have to say yes if your parents are home. I-I mean you don't n-need to have m-me. I-I can stay at my place." He told Sasha.
Sasha smiled a wide, toothy smile. "Of course you can stay at mine!" he beamed, "You're always welcome." The smile on Sasha's face was pretty much unwavering. He swayed side-to-side happily with a little bounce. "Ooo, what do you want to do while you're there! There's so many things we could do!" At this point, Sasha was blabbing like a little kid having their first sleepover. He stopped abruptly. "Of course, unless you want to just sleep," he added, "in that case, I won't bother you."
"No, no, no we can stay up. You have some energy to burn off anyway…" he giggled. "Y-You're c-cute when you a-act excited." His voice was still stuffy from his break down. "Why do I keep doing that!" he banged his head against the wheel which made it honk. Alec jumped as the sudden noise frightened him.
Sasha started out stifling his laughter but after a few quick seconds, he'd completely lost it. He couldn't help but laugh as Alec had accidentally honked the horn. "Jeez, Alec. Be a little more careful, would you?" he teased. Despite his confident voice, Sasha was turned to the window so that Alec wouldn't see the fact that being called cute actually made him blush. "So, uhh, since we're staying up, whaddya wanna do?"
Alec's cheeks turned pink. He hit Sasha's shoulder playfully. "S-S-Stop laughing at me!" he yelled, hitting his shoulder. He then pressed on the glass pedal when the light turned green. "Meanie!" Alec pouted. "I get scared easily, so what?" He mumbled. Alec stopped talking for a while afraid of embarrassing himself again. "W-WHy don't we play truth or dare?"
Sasha's face brightened at the suggestion, the redness in his face finally dying down some. He had finally turned his face from the window but still didn't look at Alec. "That's a lovely suggestion," he said, almost as if he were talking to the windshield.
From the side, the only thing of Sasha's face that could be seen was from his cheeks below. You couldn't see his eyes, much less where he was looking. He sometimes used that to his advantage to steal glances at Alec. A small smile crept onto his face, dusted by a light blush. He pulled his hair over his shoulder and began to twirl it between his fingers. He whispered to himself: "I can't wait until we get there."
He spoke in a louder voice to Alec, inquiring a little about their upcoming game of truth or dare. "So, do you have anything in mind for truth or dare or did you just choose something random?"
Alec's face went red. He knew that this would end badly. "W-Well, I was th-thinking if we could play truth or dare. Just some ruled t-to c-cover. The d-dare can't be too e-extreme. N-No embarrassing questions. A-Also are you still drunk or are you sober?" Alec gripped the wheel. "A-And c-can you lend me s-some c-clothes please?" He pulled up at Sasha's house seconds later. Alec took off his seat belt, struggling to do so. He stepped out of the car and walked to the curb. Alec kept his head down as he waited for Sasha to come out.
Sasha nodded in acknowledgement to all of the rules. When he heard the question he had to think for a moment. "Uhh, I think I'm sober, I don't really know," he responded, "but I don't think I'll be doing anything too… impulsive anytime soon." He thought once again about the whole clothes thing, taking in the fact that most of his clothes would most likely be too big on Alec. "Uh… I'll see what I can do about the clothes," he answered. "Come on, let's get inside."
He walked up to the front door, carefully placing the key into the lock and turning. Soon there was a faint popping sound and Sasha pushed open the door. "Ladies first," he said with a smile, gesturing for Alec to go first.
"I-I-I'm not a lady, I'm a man!" he whined stomping through the door. Alec made his way up the stairs and to Sasha's room. He already knew where it was from the countless times of coming here. Alec stepped in Sasha's room and sat on the bed. As he waited for Sasha he looked around the room. Trying to see if anything was new. He then spotted a picture that was framed on his dresser. It was the first picture they ever took together. Alec sighed and leaned back on the bed. Alec placed his head in Sasha's pillow and closed his eyes. "Smells just like him…" Alec whispered.