forum Tell Me Stuff You Heard High/Middle School Students Say!

Started September 23, 2018 by Deleted user

tune

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"Abolish parents in The Great Orphaning of 2021!"

"I'm going to munch crunch my way to hell"

Not a quote, but I feel like I should tell you that my entire grade refers to the Great Depression as the "Big Sad," and the Revolutionary War as the "Great British Break Off."

"If you sing the dance of italy song more time, i will bury you"

"I used to be a dumb blonde, but then I dyed my hair, so now I'm just dumb."

"Use a lot of force, we want this to feel good, and remember to be quick" My theatre director as we were moving a big set piece

"God can't kill me, what makes you think you can?"
~
"Mate, we all have god complexes, but I'm the tallest one here. So the only god up here is me."

My spanish teacher: calls on Jose to answer her question of how to say 200 in spanish*
(There's two Jose's in my class, for reference)
Jose T: Why do I even need to know numbers that high in spanish?
Ms, M: For when you're buying or selling something that's 200 dollars.
Jose O: What the heck would I be selling for 200 dollars in Mexico?
Jose T: …drugs…
Jose O: Nah, I can just sell those at school, it's a lot easier
Ms. M: You can NOT sell drugs at school, Josito
Jose O: Aw but why notttttt
Jose T: How am I supposed to support my family if I can't sell drugs??
Jose O: Yeah, how am I supposed to get that bread?

Welcome to Spanish 2, everybody

"I may be a sad bitch, but I'm also a bad bitch."

"ok. don't steal her kitten and we'll all be fine."
"[steals the kitten anyway]"
"what tHE FUCK DID I JUST SAY"

"Ah shit, stabbed myself with my pencil… It's in the wrong place, supposed to stab other people!"

"Tippity tap, let's hope I don't snap"

Me and my friends: casually walking to school
Me:spotting a random ball cap on the ground "Hey, look, a hat"
My friend: "No cap-"

some straight kid to my friend: "what gender are y-"
my friend: "no."
straight kid: "i- what gend-"
my friend: "n ⁰"

In english class, talking about sci-fi:
my teacher: "what are some elements of sci-fi?"
kids give answers like technology, futuristic what-nots, etc
my teacher: "did someone say fish?"
student: "OHMIGOD SCI-FISH-"

In english class, talking about sci-fi:
my teacher: "what are some elements of sci-fi?"
kids give answers like technology, futuristic what-nots, etc
my teacher: "did someone say fish?"
student: "OHMIGOD SCI-FISH-"

"Will you shoot me?"
"Will you shoot me at the same time?"
"Of course."
"Then yes."

"scams are a hoax."
"doesn't that techincally make scams a scam within a scam? [walks away]"
"hEY WAIT YOU GET BACK HERE AND TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK THAT MEANS YOU LOGICAL PIECE OF SHIT"

Context: A scammer called my friend Nadine during lunch so I answered
"Llama's with Hats baby hand emporium, how may we supply orphan meat for your meat dragon today?"

german teacher: [holding up a flashcard] "this is a language"
classmate: "uh, france-"
me: "yEs i sPeAk fRaNce"

Context: Dungeons and Dragons
"You decide to carry the coffin inside."
"And I assume we'll be dancing."

Context: Also DnD
"Hey lover boy, wanna have some fun?"
"No"
"So, the succubus is shocked a bard doesn't want to have the honky tonky and takes damage from the whiplash-"

Context: Also DnD
"Hey lover boy, wanna have some fun?"
"No"
"So, the succubus is shocked a bard doesn't want to have the honky tonky and takes damage from the whiplash-"

i spit out my water

"Can I roll a metagaming check?"
"Sure."
The player proceeded to roll a nat 20

Context: Also DnD
"Hey lover boy, wanna have some fun?"
"No"
"So, the succubus is shocked a bard doesn't want to have the honky tonky and takes damage from the whiplash-"

i spit out my water

So did everyone else lol