forum Quotes from the List of Completely Weird and Random Things We’ve Overheard… (About 15 quotes will be posted daily, and feel completely free to add your own!)

Started April 03, 2023 by @IamNOTachickenok

tune

“Stop sexualizing my fidget toy!”

"I want my job to be like the movie Saw"

"welcome back my little cherubs"
"so quiet….are all of you plotting my demise"
"So, according to the district, i don't exist!"

"She is in her death sack, walking towards the door. "

"Today you will be thinking about the Roman empire whether you like it or not."

"Who have I not hit yet today?"
"All right everybody, start punching!"
"My worst fear is administration walking in while I'm teaching you guys how to hit each other."

(Sowwy if this is kinda political it's funny)
Rando pro-lifer at a parade: Aren't you glad you mom had you?
My ass: No.

XDDD literally- I wanna sue my bio mom for having me.

It was so funny. She just looked flabbergasted.

Tw suicide

"can i taunt him again?" "you're bleeding profusely." "you'll never be half the man your mother was!" "you're at 0hp." "worth it."

"She has perfect eyelashes that she uses to fly."

"OH WAIT THATS NOT CHUCKIE THATS PETER. I WAS GONNA ASK WHAT CRAWLED UP CHUCKIES VAGINA AND DIED BUT ITS PETER"

“She stole my wood. She just took it. Did you see that, she stole my wood-“

"Duh. I'm a whore. Not a homewreker"

"shhhhhhh bbg, daddys home <3" "YOU ARE NOT DADDY" "Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh bbg."

• "…and they were cracking eggs behind the TV."
• "Aw, he smells like Oobleck and eggrolls."
• "He [the father] told me my baby looked like when SpongeBob went to the dance with those long legs!"

Chemistry prof casually giving us the most unhinged quotes I've heard in a while-

• "Oh, yeah. You can separate the copper from the zinc, but if you do it wrong, you die."

• "Don't drink the chemicals. They are not tasty."

• "I'm serious - the first step creates a poisonous gas that will kill everyone in this room."

• "Have you ever seen hair catch fire? By the time you realize, you've already lost half of it."

• "Are you eating sand?"

• "Want some assorted foliage? I don't know what it is, either!"

“I want to be pinched- I- I don’t want to be pinched-“

Another update: “Go on, pinch me! Yeaaaaaaa-”

"I wish i were an irish girl back then"

"A shark could easily outswim me, but I can run faster than a shark, so in a triathalon it would come down to the cycling."

"YOU SHARTBALL"

"this is my human persona." "does he do anything cool?" "he evades taxes and is allergic to diary."

"this is my human persona." "does he do anything cool?" "he evades taxes and is allergic to diary."

lmao

"He hears everything and sees all. But most importantly, he frew up"