@NutEllaDraws-lost-count. Are you okay? You're cussing and giving off serious bad vibes. Is there something that can help?

i’m better now, for the most part…
i really don’t want to get into detail, but to put things as simply and vaguely as possible, i had a very bad evening yesterday, and went through a bit of a… _{well… relapse.}

_{…*before anyone starts to worry, it had absolutely nothing to do with the drama. i was the only one responsible in making that evening hell, and none of you would’ve been able to change it, please do not think this is your fault in any way-}

i did a stupid, typical me, and wasn’t happy with myself
i eventually got so tired, angry, and upset that I couldn’t think straight, and i started to take it out in my responses…

i should not have done that, i should’ve found healthier ways to vent than partaking in internet drama with my only friends.
however, no amount of whining’s gonna change anything, all i can do is accept that i can’t go back, i’ve got to take a deep breath, move on, and learn from it.
it sucks, but there it is-
_{…although at the same time, i’ll admit, it’s oddly motivational…}

_{this is the month i’m going to stop. i won’t let it hurt me anymore…}

As for helping, i don’t really think there’s anything you guys can do…
don’t be an ella, ig?
i dunno…

oh and there’s also the art stress, that played a part as well but like that’s all on me, i’m the one who bit off more than i could chew and still procrastinated, so there’s not much y’all can do there either. i’m just really good at causing myself unnecessary pain…

it's alright ella, we all have our moments when we say less than ideal things- im very guilty of this but you just gotta remember that it was in the heat of the moment
you were in a bad position and acted how you felt accordingly- though, im not saying that it was good. like you said, we just gotta learn from our mistakes and move on, there's no use dwelling on it

and about your art work, just take it easy, sure you'll procrastinate- its what we do but there's a point where you have to snap out of it and actually start to work. even if it seems like it's too late. better late than never yanno?
work at your own pace and hopefully if you forget about the deadline it'll relax ya a little (it's something i do when a due date is close and i have to get something done. i've learned that there's really no use stressing about it, you'll only make yourself feel worse and we kiiindaa dont want that)

GUYS
I HAVE SOMETHING TOO

incoming vent…

i'm the closest i've ever been to what i can call a panic attack-
i really really need to borrow someone's pms-
please-

The word "squelching" and the number 37 are both chaotic evil, but different kinds.
Squelching is chaotic evil badass and 37 is chaotic evil dumbass

please xander can i borrow your pms for a bit i promise ill try my best to make it quikc

I'm not good at comforting people, but of course, go ahead

thank you i just need to talk about it-

Inhales a smoothie
What's up nerds, I am so close to spacing out for the rest of the day and I've only been up for fifteen minutes

Greetings, Reed.

Teachers: Shakespeare's plays are of the highest class, and they must be taken 100% seriously at all times.
Me, remembering the fact that Henry V literally has the line "Pistol's cock is up" in it: Okay.

Remembering that Hamlet is 100% gay for Horatio, but can't resist Laertes: uh huh
Also remembering that A Mid Summer is literally about everyone getting laid: sure sure

Me, remembering this:

whatever you say

Teachers: Shakespeare's plays are of the highest class, and they must be taken 100% seriously at all times.
Me, remembering the fact that Henry V literally has the line "Pistol's cock is up" in it: Okay.

Remembering that Hamlet is 100% gay for Horatio, but can't resist Laertes: uh huh
Also remembering that A Mid Summer is literally about everyone getting laid: sure sure

It so is, and let's not forget that Oberon never lifts the spell from Demetrius.
Also all the pie stuff, puns, and the yo mom joke in Titus Andronicus.

Teachers: Shakespeare's plays are of the highest class, and they must be taken 100% seriously at all times.
Me, remembering the fact that Henry V literally has the line "Pistol's cock is up" in it: Okay.

Remembering that Hamlet is 100% gay for Horatio, but can't resist Laertes: uh huh
Also remembering that A Mid Summer is literally about everyone getting laid: sure sure

Wants to make a joke about Bottom.

So I tied my shoes the 'right way'
finally
Thanks WikiHow and no thanks to my parents i guess

I HAVE BEEN ON THIS PLANET FOR OVER A DECADE AND CAN'T TIE MY SHOES LIKE A NORMAL HUMAN BEING

When I was younger I used to do five bows.

I-
What-
How-

I was always a different child.
I actually didn't learn to swing, tie shoes, whistle, or snap until later in life. So at eight or whatever, now that I could tie shoes I was gonna do it like a boss. Still can't really whistle though. But I can snap on four different fingers.

i should not have done that, i should’ve found healthier ways to vent than partaking in internet drama with my only friends.
however, no amount of whining’s gonna change anything, all i can do is accept that i can’t go back, i’ve got to take a deep breath, move on, and learn from it.

This is a really mature response.

it sucks, but there it is-
_{…although at the same time, i’ll admit, it’s oddly motivational…}

_{this is the month i’m going to stop. i won’t let it hurt me anymore…}

Hell yeah! I quit more than a year ago and have relapsed less than five times. You can do it!

As for helping, i don’t really think there’s anything you guys can do…
don’t be an ella, ig?
i dunno…

Well pm me if you need me.

Teachers: Shakespeare's plays are of the highest class, and they must be taken 100% seriously at all times.
Me, remembering the fact that Henry V literally has the line "Pistol's cock is up" in it: Okay.

Remembering that Hamlet is 100% gay for Horatio, but can't resist Laertes: uh huh
Also remembering that A Mid Summer is literally about everyone getting laid: sure sure

Wants to make a joke about Bottom.

Restrains self

So I've been trudging through this chat and I have some things to say.
Maddie. Dearie please listen. You have an issue. Is there anyone you can go to to help?

I already have a therapist
_{I just don't tell him lol}

AAAHHHHH they cancled the rest of this school year for Nebraska…im not happy… i miss all of my irl friends…and all my teachers…but then again, i don't have to deal with being molested by guys! ^ w ^ so i guess that's a plus to this. But i do want to just leave my house, and im tired of my parents constantly fighting, im about to murder my brothers and just leave for a few days… i need a break…

Sister: In labor
Me: I sleep
School: We don’t exist
Me: Has mental break down from lack of social interaction with friends

Sister: In labor
Me: I sleep
School: We don’t exist
Me: Has mental break down from lack of social interaction with friends

Be Prepared For Hugs

They cancelled the rest of the school year, so I'm having a mental breakdown. My people won't remember me when we come back, I guarantee it.

They cancelled the rest of the school year, so I'm having a mental breakdown. My people won't remember me when we come back, I guarantee it.

Why would they cancel the rest of a school year??!!
Also if they’re your homies they will 😊👍