Hans-my-hedgehog

“Yeah what’s he getting done, dying on a picnic table?”

“One day Canada is going to snap and Quebec will be in the epicentre of it all”

"Well, i prefer pots over pans"
"That's…..i don't think you know how it works"
"BUT ITS JUST A PAN RIGHT?"
"I give up…."

Anything? He shouted into the empty void of his head. Nah, it shouted back.

"Not even puppet PDA."

"My dentist doesn't like me either, apparently it was "offputting" when I camped out in his office for four and a half days because I wanted him to clean my tooth collection before I put the teeth in my salad for a garnish"

Whoa.

car starts flying off of road, glitches back onto ground
"I sure hope I wasnt the only one who saw that"

"Everyone's Raw inside until they're cooked."

“She jumped into the bear trap and now she’s dead”

results
🤷

"KMART IS THE WALMART VERSION OF WALMART"

"KMART IS THE WALMART VERSION OF WALMART"

OH MY GOD IT'S TRUE

"It's a choir of zombies!"

"KMART IS THE WALMART VERSION OF WALMART"

OH MY GOD IT'S TRUE

RIGHT

"Hello fellow human, I'm here to remind you to ASHES BLOWING IN THE AIR, MY WORLD'S ON FIRE BUT WE DON'T CARE."

BpoCCZkvjo

He's seducing him to get a dog…

He chose a monkey and a dog. A monkey because it has strength and a dog because it has speed

Hehe, I stole your liver

"I didn't get you dirty THERE"

Hippos are pretty rad

I want to eat your pancreas.

"Tax Evasion the cave spider"

Just ran over my sister with my ATV.

Just ran over my sister with my ATV.

Haven't we all done that? I think I ran my sister over with my Jeep.

Just ran over my sister with my ATV.

Pfft. I ran over myself.

Remember when as kids we said nanananabooboo to taunt each other? Because I didn't until today