forum Broken Dreams and Haunting Memories// Closed!// 16+

Started September 19, 2020 by @ElderGodSwimwithGamers group

tune

“Well maybe it’s better that he doesn’t remember then.” It’s just be one more thing for Simon to deal with.

"I must agree." Astral shook his head again. "He has enough to deal with as it is."

“He does.” Emile agreed. He was letting his guard down a bit more. He still didn’t trust Astral but he was less on edge now.

"Hopefully, Mia will be able to keep helping him." Astral was surprised to find Emile letting his guard down some, but he wouldn't push. Don't make it obvious.

“She will.” He sounded certain. “She’s Simon’s friend, so her just being there will help him.”

"Good. I'm still worried about both of them, especially after what Mia tried to do earlier…" Astral let out the softest of breaths.

He nodded in agreement. Emile was relieved that Astral was worried about Mia’s health too, even if it was only because she was helping Simon.

He really was just worried that Mia would get Simon over the edge too if she did anything. Still, he didn't know how to explain that they wouldn't go anywhere. They'd still be in the palace- they might even end up literally in Astral's hands if they did that.

Emile of course didn’t know this. Though he should’ve assumed it, since his soul bond with Alec was very similar. “So do you really just leave the two of them alone all day?” He asked.

"Yeah, pretty much. I figured it would be worse in the long run if I stayed around Simon, and I didn't want him to see me crying anymore than he already had." Astral didn't want Simon to think differently of him than he already had. He didn't deserve any sympathy, nothing of the sort. He didn't want to end up like other abusers, using their pain to get Simon to forgive them.

And that was something that had definitely happened to Simon before. “You plan on being around more once the kid’s born?” He asked, hoping that the two would be able to work something out for managing the kid. If Simon even survived past the birth that is.

"Yes, I do. I don't want Simon and Mia to have to try to take care of the child on their own. I know how already, which should be of help." Astral figured Simon wouldn't just give the child up, that was at least clear to him.

He nodded. “Good. That’s good.” Simon knew a bit about taking care of babies, but he did better with toddlers. And especially right after the birth, he was going to be overwhelmed a lot of the time.

"We'll have to watch for postpartum depression too, on top of what he already has." Astral sighed deeply.

“Yeah…I’m honestly not sure if he’ll develop it or not. At this point, I think it could go either way.” Emile said. It would be really unfortunate if that were to end up happening.

Very very unfortunate.
"Hopefully he doesn't… He's got too much already. Much more than he ever deserved."

Emile nodded in agreement. “At the very least he’s going to be lost for awhile. He won’t know what to do with himself anymore. If that does happen it might help to give him small tasks, just things so he can feel useful.

"I'll talk to Mia about that," Astral agreed. "I'm just worried if I'm the one to ask him to do things, even little things, he'll feel like he doesn't have a choice and is in danger if he doesn't."

“Yeah that’s very true.” He was glad that to some degree, at least for the moment, Astral was considering how all of his actions would impact Simon in the future.

"He's… show some, ah, not wanting me to never talk to him ever again? But if we are going to work on finding a way to live together again, I'm going to have to take it damn slow, and be careful that I don't push." Astral let out a sigh, hands folding.

((YES ASTRAL YES NOW YOU’RE GETTING IT!!))

“I’m sure he’ll appreciate that. Really. He will.” These were pretty reassuring signs so far, as long as Astral actually followed through. But the god was getting there, and that was good. Simon would appreciate it. Emile knew he sure did when Alec had to do the same to mend their relationship. Of course for different reasons, but around the same level of damage done.

(NOW HE JUST HAS TO FIGURE OUT THE ACTUAL STEPS TO TAKE XD)
(And I'm super curious about Alec and Emile now)

"Mm…" Astral just hoped he could figure it out, do his best to actually carry through with this. He didn't want Simon hurt anymore, and he wanted to actually keep him safe. Not the thoughts that had been crossing his mind before, not the things that would just hurt him.
"It's going to take time, to teach myself to be… kind. But it'll be worth it."

((YEAH THATS THE HARD PART OOF))
((I can tell you if you wanttttt))

“Yes. Yes it will be. You just have to stick with it and try your hardest. And there are going to be times when you slip up, but you just have to keep trying.” Emile reassured.

(Yes pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeee gimme angst uwu)

Astral nodded once firmly, his hands closing into determined fists.
"Right." The god fell quiet for a moment. "I… any tips? I have… no idea what this is going to take, not really. Knowing the things you shouldn't do is different than the things you need to do."

((yesssssss I have an obsession with them lmao))
((So to start off with, Emile’s been dead for awhile. He was alive in like the 1300s. He was always a social outcast for multiple reasons and was forced to live outside of his village from a very young age. Alec basically took advantage of him being vulnerable, got Emile to trust him, and then convinced Emile to murder everyone in the town, bit by bit because they deserved it which I mean they did sooo. And of course they eventually got caught, or at least Emile did. Alec basically left him to get executed and then didn’t rescue him from damnation for a good century or so so yeah they had issues.))

“Just…be careful with him. Simon’s very fragile, he always has been. Always ask if he’s okay with something before you do it. Go and check up on him every few days at least, not for the baby, but for him, just to make sure he’s doing okay.” He said, listing the first few things off the top of his head. “Prove that you can be better, show that you can stay calm. You just have to show him that you care.”