Student: "Oh look, I'm the perfect height!"
class turns to look at student—she's sitting on a seven foot tall cupboard, touching the ceiling with her head
Teacher: "I SAID NOOO NOT ALL THE WAY UP THERE!!"
Student: Aw, but the smaller shelf isn't as fun to sit on :("
Teacher: "It's probably really dusty up there anyways."
Student: "Nah, it's not that dusty—okaaay, maybe it's a little dusty."
she gets down and sits on the smaller, five foot tall shelf
Teacher: "Thank you."
Student: "Your welcome, Mrs. [Insert Teacher's Name Here]."
I, too, am sitting on that smaller shelf at this very moment. That same student ten minutes ago said:
"You're in a really dance-y mood today," as our teacher danced to the CNN10 theme song.
"I like it brown"
-my friend at lunch (She said it really derpily and it was hilarious)
"That cheese is almost a year expired!"
"It'S NoT!"
-conversation at lunch between my friends
"You make all situations uncomfortable"
-also my friend, to a mutually disliked person in the school
"Why are we talking about death again?… Oh, right, the Ferris wheel is on fire."
"Father, this is its flesh. Would you like its flesh?"
friend: you know that winnie the pooh meme?
me: i am familiar with the dan howell, yes
friend:
friend:
friend: touché
"What is with you kids and jumping off of buildings?"
-My millennial teacher
"No, Noah, I will not shoot you, nor will anyone in here, no matter how much they might want to and how mch you ask!" -My language arts teacher to me
"No, Noah, I will not shoot you, nor will anyone in here, no matter how much they might want to and how mch you ask!" -My language arts teacher to me
oof
right here we have the difference between gen z and…. everyone else
"I am the real estate wizard!"
"You are under my mind control, now go lick his eyeball."
"It was boo who licked you eyeball, not Oliver"
- 1st one was my brother, others were me
"can you bleach your pubes"
honestly what the fuck
"can you bleach your pubes"
honestly what the fuck
???????????????????????????????????????????????
NO?
Well it's not really said but our school made a cult for our algebra teacher. (i kinda think it went too far tho)
"Matanza steel drums are going sicko mode during lunch today!"
Well it's not really said but our school made a cult for our algebra teacher. (i kinda think it went too far tho)
yo, people at my school created a cult for our english teacher. the compass cult dedicated to the holy compass thigh tattoo that he supposedly has.
Bro our algebra teacher knows about the cult and one of our teachers is jealous of it
I’m going to refer to people by their first initials, so that’s what the letters mean
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Me: finds a stick that’s pointy on both ends
Me: I found a pokey thing
S: Ooh can I have it? I wanna stab someone!
C: Can I help?
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S: But (my name)’s the least violent out of all of us! Why does she get the weapon?
C: Probably because she’s the least violent out of all of us
Spoiler - click to show.
Context: we’re doing a Stations of the Cross thing where we act out the stations (except we’re still) and I’m a soldier/guard so I have a spear. One of them broke so they took it to our art teacher to fix it. He fixed it, and I’m carrying it over to church for practice. My friends are fighting over who gets to hold it
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My friend (S) wrote a parody of Sunbeams and Sea (the mermaid song in Peter Pan) about bald heads. I was going to post it, but I was cringing too much while I typed it and I decided not to torture you
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In Spanish class, learning forms of the verb tener.
Teacher: Now I want you to write a sentence using tener
Classmate (G): yo tenga…I have…how do you say no life?
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During mic check the other day, you know how you’re supposed to say something and then sing? The boy who plays John sang “Baby” by Justin Bieber (I think you’re supposed to sing something from the show, but he made the whole cast laugh)
"gays were sent to earth to control overpopulation!"
Teacher: do you know your name?
Kid: yes, of course
Teacher: then whats your name?
Kid: …
Teacher: what’s the name of your third grade teacher?
Kid: oh, Mrs. (name)
Teacher: so you know that but not your name
Kid: I know my name. It’s… its… um…
Teacher: nice to meet you Um
"gays were sent to earth to control overpopulation!"
Either Bo Burnham goes to your school or a Bo Burnham fan does
"Would you like to join our cult"
My best friend to anyone who sits with our friend group at lunch
