forum Incorrect Quotes 2: Electric Boogaloo

Started July 17, 2020 by @HighPockets group

tune

Jaq: It's not illegal
Officer: looking at the tons of milk cartons there's just so much
Jaq: But it's not illegal.

Otori, handing out fliers: Are you interested in killing the whales

Cyn: What are you doing?
Parsley: I'm trying to give you a big ol' hug.
Cyn: Thought you were attacking me.

Akira: Look, I love you like a brother, but right now I hate you like my actual brother, Cyn, who I hate.

Akira: Cyn, have you noticed that Lin has been acting rather strange lately?
Cyn: Yeah, going on three years now.

Soren: What goes up but never comes down?
Cyn: The amount of stress you bring to our lives.

Ava, while dabbing: My parents left me at birth

Lucas: PRAISE ME PEASANTS
Sophie: Get down from there, Lucas

Micheal: My mom told me to get off Touhou so I threw my controller at her and she died so that's an epic win

Poli: It's not illegal.
Officer, looking at the dozens of milk cartons stacked in his trunk: There's just so much.
Poli: But it's not illegal.

Cyrus: What goes up but never comes down?
Magnus: The amount of stress you bring to our lives.

Jack: Emmett, have you noticed that Love has been acting rather strange lately?
Emmett: Yeah, going on two hundred years now.

Jackson: It's not illegal.
Officer, looking at the dozens of milk cartons stacked in his trunk: There's just so much.
Jackson: But it's not illegal.

Percy: What goes up but never comes down?
Alessandra: The amount of stress you bring to our lives.

Alys: Poplar, have you noticed that Oleander has been acting rather strange lately?
Poplar: Yeah, going on one hundred years now.

Magnus: Why do you look so tired?
Anthony: No rest for the wicked.
Quill: We stayed up late watching cat videos!

Drinn: Please will you stop framing me for murder?
Drinn: Just because I've killed people doesn't mean I've killed that specific one!
Vio:

Tetra: You're stupid.
Poli: That's all you've got?
Tetra: Give it time. It'll eat at you.
[Later]
Poli: Zee, am I stupid?
Zephyr: Yeah, a little.
Poli: Damn her.

Emmett: Guys, shhhh. Do you know what that sound is?
Cyrus: What is it?
Emmett: That was the sound of my patience shattering into a billion pieces.

Quill: What's the proper way to deal with a guy annoying you?
Cyrus: A knife.
Quill: …What?
Perry: Two knives?
Quill: No!
Jack: You all are savages. The proper way is a untraceable poison.
Quill: Never mind.

Jack: Wears very dark grey
Anthony: I see you’re getting out the spring colors.

Drinn: Nice rock.
Ibis: Thanks! Vio gave it to me.
Vio: I threw it at you!
Ibis: Isn’t he the best?

Kai: Wow. Once again, my character is under attack simply because I have taken the lives of hundreds of innocent people.

Lotus: [traps a wasp under a cup]
Hinata: [appears and sets down 2 more cups]
Lotus: No…
Hinata: [starts to shuffle them]

Mica: You give me a gift? Bam! Thank you note. You invite me somewhere? Pow! RSVP. You do me a favour? Wham! Favour returned. Do NOT test my politeness.

Kit, seductively: Tell me your wildest fantasy.
Collin: I’m on the Wheel of Fortune, and I spin it so hard it lights on fire.
Kit: No, I meant like-
Collin: Everyone claps.

Mica: Money absolutely does not buy happiness.
Collin: You’re probably just spending it wrong. Give it to me, and I’ll show you how it’s done.

Liv: Would you slap one of us for one hundred pounds?
Isla: I’d roundhouse kick all of you in the face for free.

Jordan: sorry i lost my cool for a second
Ivy: you can’t lose something you never had

Ivy: Why wouldn’t Isla invite us to her party?
Bella: She thinks we’re gonna embarrass her in front of Florence, which, frankly, is insulting! stands up quickly and knocks over a bowl Aww man, all the orange soda spilled out of my cereal.
Liv: facepalms in background

Florence: my girlfriend is too tall for me to kiss her, what do i do?
Ivy: punch her in the stomach, so when she doubles over, you can kiss her.
Bella: use a sword to take off her legs
Meg and Shel: kick her where it hurts
Liv: NO! JUST ASK HER TO LEAN DOWN

Alice: are you in love with Ivy?
Jordan: sweats..no
Alice: then why are you drawing j+i everywhere
Jordan: it stands for jeopardy and impendingdoom
Jordan: I swear impendingdoom is one word

Liv: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Bella: I've been zoned out for the last two and a half hours.
Isla: I got distracted about half way through.
Ivy: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

Ivy: How stupid do you think I am?!
Liv: You really want an honest answer to that?

Jordan: I can't get Liv to come out of her room
Ivy: Tell her I said something
Jordan: Like what?
Ivy: Anything factually incorrect
30 seconds later
Liv: bursts through the door You think JELLYFISH are ALIENS?!

Isla: They’re fake eyelashes, you glue them on
Ivy: Why would you do that?
Bella: Yeah what the heck
Isla: Have you seriously never heard of gluing them on? watch this
Isla: Pulls off eyelashes
Bella [Panicked gasp]: STOP
Ivy: Wait. I'm confused. Do you still have eyelashes??

Liv: Where’s Ivy?
Bella, remembering that Ivy got her head stuck in a tuba after Liv specifically told Ivy to leave it alone, and that she’s supposed to cover for Isla and Alice as they frantically work together to free Ivy’s head from the tuba: Who’s Ivy?

Ren: Amari told me that instead of being sad, I should 'Go get it, girl'. So I am going to go get it, girl.
Takeo: Get what?
Ren: Unclear. I will get everything, just to be safe.

Varian: Life is so fun when you automatically assume everyone has a crush on you.

Marcello, on his phone at 2 a.m: Jeez, a woman strangled her husband to death. Can you imagine just snapping like that?
Margo, trying to sleep next to him: Yes.

Alune: Ever spill a little bit of your coffee and realize the thread you are hanging on by is actually quite thin?

Varian: It's not my fault that I have no parental figures to tell me not to wrestle bears.
Graham, on the verge of ripping his hair out: Me. I am the parental figure. I’m telling you. Do not wrestle bears.

Lynn: Why do you look so tired?
Alune: No rest for the wicked.
Sana: We stayed up late watching cat videos!

Leaoni: You're stupid.
Kallai: That's all you've got?
Leaoni: Give it time. It'll eat at you.
[Later]
Kallai: Takeo, am I stupid?
Takeo: Yeah, a little.
Kallai: Damn her.

Alune: Guys, shhhh. Do you know what that sound is?
Frost: What is it?
Alune: That was the sound of my patience shattering into a billion pieces.

Sana: What's the proper way to deal with a guy annoying you?
Leaoni: A knife.
Sana: …What?
Takeo: Two knives?
Sana: No!
Zatian: You all are savages. The proper way is an untraceable poison.
Sana: Never mind.

Kallai: Nice rock.
Frost: Thanks! Leaoni gave it to me.
Leaoni: I threw it at you!
Frost: Isn’t she the best?

Graham: Would you slap one of us for one hundred pounds?
Leaoni: I’d roundhouse kick all of you in the face for free.

Takeo: sorry i lost my cool for a second
Varian: you can’t lose something you never had

Leaoni: Are you in love with Alune?
Varian, genuinely confused: No?
Leaoni: Then why are you drawing V+A everywhere?
Varian: Because It stands for Varian is Awesome? Obviously?
Leaoni: Oh my god.

Frost: It's not illegal.
Officer, looking at the dozens of milk cartons stacked in his trunk: There's just so much.
Frost: But it's not illegal.

Ibis: Wow. Once again, my character is under attack simply because I have taken the lives of dozens of innocent people.

Vio: [Traps a wasp under a cup]
Drinn: [Appears and sets down two more cups]
Vio, horrified: No…
Drinn: [Starts to shuffle them]

Quill: I can't get El to come out of his room.
Perry: Tell him I said something.
Quill: Like what?
Perry: Anything factually incorrect.
[30 seconds later]
Elias, bursting through the door: You think jellyfish are aliens?!

Quill: Perry told me that instead of being sad, I should 'Go get it, girl'. So I am going to go get it, girl.
Elias: Get what?
Quill: Unclear. I’ll go get everything, just to be safe.

Jack: Life is so fun when you automatically assume everyone has a crush on you.

Oleander: Wow. Once again, my character is under attack simply because I have taken the lives of dozens of innocent people.

Oleander: Life is so fun when you automatically assume everyone has a crush on you.

Blevin giving advice to Amerly: If you want to be his waifu try not to stab him to stab with a knifu

Charlie: How much of those did you even take?
Kelly, with a cigarette: Enough to make you look pretty

Camille: What's the proper way to deal with a guy annoying you?
Insato: A knife.
Camille: …What?
Mavis: Two knives?
Camille: No!
Hunter: You all are savages. The proper way is an untraceable poison.
Camille: Never mind.

Glass breaks
Micheal: What was that
Matthew: Just my sanity, It does that ever now and againg

Habit: I'm sorry I talked you into this…
Kit: It's okay.
Kit: I'm sorry I listened.

Collin: What in the hot crispy Kentucky-fried FUCK?!

Shiro: Oh, you've had sex? Well, I've had enough.

Collin: omw to ruin everyone's lives.

Della: Teagan told me that instead of being sad, I should 'Go get it, girl'. So I am going to go get it, girl.
Theo: Get what?
Della: Unclear. I’ll go get everything, just to be safe.

Aaron, crying: These aren't tears, these are precum of the heart _{is the word precum allowed}

in the gfa group chat:

nicky: you do know killing people is a crime, right?
catori: show me the law
kas: sends link proof
catori: im not reading that

((for fun, group chat names in order of appearance; nickster, dead_to_rights, and paeonia_suffraticosa))

Quin: Did it hurt when you fell?
Alik: From heaven? No, I’m no–
Quin: No, I mean when you fell down the stairs. I watched you fall and just kind of lay there on the floor for about ten minutes.
Alik:
Kelly: We both saw that.

Ceza, coming up behind Eleria: Hey
Eleria: I must be an angel
Ceza: Don't you mean "you must be an angel"?
Eleria: No I mean you just scared the hell out of me so the only stuff that's left is heaven

Anthony: Oh, you've had sex? Well, I've had enough.

Kit: ARE YOU-
Hinata: Fucking
Kit: -KIDDING ME??
Shiro: …what the hell was that?
Hinata: Habit banned Kit from swearing, so I’ve volunteered to help her out

Kuro: So are you guys a little spoon or a big spoon?
Kit: Knife
Hinata: Fork

Kit: Hey Doc
Habit: Yes?
Kit: Do you want to see a butterfly?
Habit: I swear, if you throw bu-
Kit: [throws butter across the room]
Habit: [WHeeZe]

Kit: I fucking hate sunflowers. Look at those fucking things. They’re taller than me. This flower is winning and I am losing. That shouldn’t be possible why am I losing to a plant
Hinata: what about trees?
Kit: Oh don’t even get me STARTED

Kit: you’re maybe the most dramatic bitch here
Habit: Maybe?
Habit: Just maybe?
Habit: Who’s more? Who are they?? I demand answers

Habit: [ungodly sound]
Kit:
Habit, offended: You aren’t gonna say bless you?
Kit: That was a fuCKING SNEEZE?!

Hinata: you always need to be kind to people.
Habit: Hey-
Hinata: Fuck off.

Kit: Hi son
Vess: What?
Habit, handing him adoption papers: Son. Please sign here.
Ves: WHAT?!?!?!

Habit: Okay, so, are we fighting or are we flirting? Because I’m getting mixed signals here
Kit: My hands are literally inches from your throat right now
Habit: That doesn’t answer my question

Kit: [playing the windows shutdown theme on piano]
Kit: [passes out]

Bella: Hey guys- Why are you all standing on chairs? Are you playing a game?
Isla: Yeah, we’re playing “we saw a big-ass spider and don’t know where the heck it went”
Bella: scrambles onto chair

Liv: Start counting.
[Ivy takes her own pulse]
Liv: How many?
Ivy: 26.
Liv: Okay, either you suck at maths, or you're going to die in two seconds.
[A moment passes, and nothing happens]
Liv: You suck at maths.

Alice: We can’t do that! Liv said-
Ivy: To hell with Liv!
Liv: I can hear you, Ivy

Liv: This is the worst idea you’ve ever had
Ivy: So far
Liv: What?
Ivy: This is the worst idea I’ve ever had, so far
Liv: That doesn’t improve the situation at all

Liv: If you see Ivy, give her this message
Liv: makes neutral face
Liv: She'll know what it means
later
Alice: Oh, and Liv said to give you a message
Alice: makes neutral face
Ivy: Oh no, the neutral face of displeasure

Alice, performing a check-up on Liv: So how are you feeling? Any problems?
Liv: Well, I have this headache that comes and goes…
**Ivy: walks in Hey guys
Liv: There it is

Ivy: Jordan and I-
Liv: Are getting married?
Ivy: No, we-
Liv, pulling out the projector: Sit down. I have the whole thing planned out.

Ivy: Can you do me a weird favour without asking any questions?
Bella: Isn't that the bedrock upon which our friendship is founded?

Liv: You all think I enjoy being mother hen to you all?!
Bella: …
Ivy: …
Meg and Shel: …
Liv: Okay fine, it’s like the only thing that keeps me sane.

(kit and habit masterpost because their shenanigans shall not go unseen [ft. hinata])

Habit: Here’s an idea: a cowboy that’s also a clown, and it goes yeehonk.
Kit, tired out of her mind: I swear to god Doc, it's two in the fucking morning, just please go to sleep.

Habit: [sitting]
Kit: TINY man. baby boy man. small. minuscule
Habit:
Habit: [stands up]
Kit, craning her neck to look up at him because he's literally 7'4: HOLY SHIT

Habit: I’m mad at you.
Kit: Literally impossible but ok.

[before things went south in The Habitat]
Kit: Fuck, I can’t move. Habit fell asleep on top of me
Hinata: Just push him off?
Kit: How DARE you suggest such a thing

Reasons why Habit can’t leave all the paperwork to Kit:

‘Dear sir/madam,

No. Go fuck yourself.

Kind regards,
Kittan Bala’