forum I'll critique your stuff!!

Started June 16, 2018 by @TryToDoItWrite

tune

Lol you're okay… is he really that hot?

@alice GET OUT!!!
{Just kidding, hey stranger}

Yea. . . He is

Lol sorry didn't mean to make him attractive… I am male irl making me blind to the reality of hot guys most of the time

shrug I'm not into guys, so I don't know. I'm just judging by @grammarqueen4's comment.

😁

The trust issues thing is also sort of cliché. There are lots of dark, mysterious characters who are guarded and have trust issues because of something in their past.

Autism affects your ability to communicate or understand so he chooses to be quiet so people don't make fun of him… There's a backstory and I can't change that without changing the fact that he's autistic.

I admire that you did your research!

My little brother has autism and James' personality was based off of him.

Autism affects your ability to communicate or understand so he chooses to be quiet so people don't make fun of him… There's a backstory and I can't change that without changing the fact that he's autistic.

I do know what autism is. My cousin is very autistic. I don't think you should change that he's autistic, or that's he's quiet so people don't make fun of him. I like both of those things about his character. There's a difference between being quiet so people don't make fun of you and having trust issues, though.

He doesn't trust people because he's afraid of getting hurt… I probably also should mention that he was abused.

Ahh

Why is that not in the main description?!?

Just out of curiosity—who abused him and why?

Why is that not in the main description?!?

Haha yeah, I was wondering that.

I apologize for the confusing half done description my humans… He was abused by his father.

Ahh

Hmm. I see. Was this due to his autism? (Also please don't say his father was alcoholic).

Unrelated question: What sparked his want to be a doctor or FBI agent?

Hmm. I see. What this due to his autism? (Also please don't say his father was alcoholic).

No, no alcoholic fathers.

OKAY… No his father is not an alcoholic, that's too cliche. It was because of his autism. His father wanted a son and he was angry about getting an imperfect one……………………..He had an older sister but she got hurt by their father and died. James wanted to help people that were like that so he wanted to be a doctor so help injured/sick people or an FBI agent to serve justice to people like his dad.

Why did his father hurt his sister?

OKAY… No his father is not an alcoholic, that's too cliche. It was because of his autism. His father wanted a son and he was angry about getting an imperfect one……………………..He had an older sister but she got hurt by their father and died. James wanted to help people that were like that so he wanted to be a doctor so help injured/sick people or an FBI agent to serve justice to people like his dad.

Nice motivation for wanting to be an FBI agent/doctor. I like it. Did his father hurt his sister because she wasn't the son he wanted?

His sister was protecting him from the dad so he got mad