"I know you've gone through some really bad things in your life, and that you've probably made a few mistakes. We all do. To be honest, you could have killed someone and I wouldn't care. All that matters is you get some actual help, and work to not make the same mistakes." Gabe looked at Alex a moment, giving him a small smile.
Alex shrugged, looking at his hands again. "Alright." he replied softly. He swallowed, closing his eyes for a moment, then looking at Gabriel cautiously.
Gabe looked back for a moment, then pushed the plate of food over to Alex.
"You should eat something," he said gently.
Alex looked at the food. He took a small bite, eyes flickering for a moment. As he reached out with his hand, his sleeve rode up, revealing scars that reached all the way around his wrist. The type that came from the skin being rubbed raw over and over and over and over.
Gabe saw the scars, saying nothing. He'd seen scars like that before.
"When was the last time you ate until you were full, if you don't mind me asking?" He said.
Alex thought for a long moment, then shrugged. "I don't know. I got used to not getting much." he looked away for a moment, tugging his sleeve back down and biting his lip.
Gabe shrugged.
"Well, you can have as much as you want right now. I'll order more of need to."
Alex studied him. "I-I can't pay you back." he said softly. "I don't have…" he bit his lip a little bit, fidgeting with his hands.
Gabe waved his hand dismissively.
"There's no need to repay me. Don't worry about it." He gave Alex another smile.
Alex swallowed slightly, looking down at his plate quickly. He had always been a sucker for cute boys smiling at him, but he couldn't afford to be anymore. Not when…not when he didn't have anything, and if Gabriel found out that not only was he probably insane, but he was a sodomite…that couldn't end well. It never did.
Gabe watched Alex for a moment, looking away when he felt that way again. Alex was a man; how dare Gabe think about him like that!
Gabe was a bit surprised when another plate of food arrived at the table.
"Frederick said you looked too hungry," the man said gruffly.
Alex glanced up when the man brought more food, then looked back down at his plate, eating some more. If he was honest, he wasn't sure how much he could eat right now. How much before his stomach was too full, unused to having enough to eat.
Gabe sighed as the man walked away.
"Well then… If you have anything left over, we can always take it back to the apartment." He shrugged.
Alex peeked over at Gabriel again, and nodded a little. "Alright. Uhm…thank you." he said softly, eating some more.
Gabe looked away again, nodding once. He'd never been much of a Catholic- his mother had raised him in a Protestant church- he felt like going to confession wouldn't be such a bad idea. Then he would be able to tell someone how he felt about men without them knowing who he was, and he could seek guidance from the Lord as to how to get rid of these heretic feelings. It had been a while since he had last felt them, and now he wasn't so sure letting Alex stay at his home was such a good idea. It was as if the devil was tempting him with someone in need, to try to pull him away from God.
Alex sighed softly, and continued eating. He hadn't ever really believed in anything. Sure, his mother had been Catholic, and devoutly so, and he had gone when he was younger, but…as he got older, he discovered that the way he felt…wasn't normal. That his abilities, his powers…would be considered of the devil. That the fact he loved men instead of women was perverted, wrong. Sodomy. So he had stopped going to church, and then a year later his mother had become ill and died. His dad…vanished. He didn't know where his father had gone. After that, he had had to make his own way.
Gabe couldn't help it- he looked everywhere, the floor, the ceiling, the table, the other people- anywhere but at Alex. He wasn't supposed to feel like this. He didn't mean to suddenly come off as cold, but he did. He was just trying to find some distance, where he could help Alex without these feelings popping up.
And he had been able to, for a while. At 17, he met Henry, who was four years older than him. They had been friends, and then…then they were more then that. Then at 19, Henry's father found out and had Alex sent to Bedlam. That was the simplified version, anyways. It was a bit more complicated than that, in reality.
Gabe dared to glance back over at Alex again. Cute- he cut himself off there, his once soft expression hardening into one of disgust and disdain. Something was wrong with him, he was sure of it.
Alex caught the look, and flinched backwards a little, biting his lip and looking down at his food again. He pressed a hand to his forehead for a moment.
Gabe saw how Alex flinched away, and he finally realized the look on his face.
"I- sorry about that. I was just thinking about things."
"Oh." Alex replied faintly. "I-I…okay. It's alright." he cleared his throat softly. He had thought, for a terrible few moments, that that look was because of him. Because of something he had done or said.
"I'm sorry if I worried you," Gabe added. He really didn't want Alex to be uncomfortable. He told himself it was because he didn't like anyone being upset.
"No, it's alright." Alex replied quickly. "Don't worry about it." he ate a little more. He didn't know what he could tell Gabriel if the other male started to ask why he had been in Bedlam. He couldn't tell the truth about any of it.
Gabe nodded, turning away again. He wondered why Alex had been in Bedlam, yes, but he didn't ask. he probably wouldn't for a while.