forum All my roleplays are dead please give me attention // closed oxo (I'll do more though)

Started November 22, 2021 by @Fraust

tune

"No you didn't," she replied. "Forcing feelings is very different from telling someone how you feel, which is what you did."

Aiki sighed. "Look. If someone randomly came up to you and told you you're hot, and you don't really know them that well, wouldn't that make you uncomfortable?"

Farah sighed. He did have a point. Thinking deeper caused her to disassociate for a moment, so she didn't respond.

"Even if he doesn't flat out hate me, I'm sure I made him uncomfortable by saying something like that out of the blue. Especially when his friends were all right there…" They sighed again.

Farah again didn't respond. She was stuck in her own head and trapped inside a memory. Her eyes were locked on her hand that was resting in her lap.

"Farah? You good?" Aiki asked, looking over at her with a confused expression and noticing that she seemed to be zoned out. "Uh… hello?"

"Oh my God. It's her!"

"Who?"

"Farah Dowling!"

Farah had been trying to study desperately in the library for hours. Each time she began to focus, she heard whispers of the other students around her. Whispers about her.

"She's single, isn't she?"

"Of course she is. She turns everyone away."

"And isn't she the most powerful fairy at Alfea?"

"Well, yeah. Besides the headmistress."

"Hey."

Farah looked up and met the eyes of a boy she'd never seen before in her life. She arched her eyebrows and nodded politely. "Hello." He looked nice. Decently groomed and moderately charming. No one out of the ordinary. But his emotional regulation needed work. The second he even thought of approaching Farah, she could feel an intense spike of nervousness. "Look," she said, trying to be nice. She could feel the entire library holding it's breath around her, and the wide eyes of students watching her every movement. "I think I know what you're here for. No, I'm sorry, but I'm not interested."

The boy's hopeful smile drained. "Oh… okay. Have a nice day." He scurried off quickly.

Farah blinked herself out of the moment. It wasn't the first time, or the most memorable, but it was the first one she thought of. She turned her head to look at Aiki. "Oh, sorry," she muttered, not meeting his gaze.

Aiki only grew more confused as he watched Farah get lost in her thoughts, and their ears pricked up when she appeared to snap out of her daze. "Uh… no problem. Are you okay? Did I do something?" He asked uneasily. "You seem kinda spacey now… I'm sorry if I upset you…"

"No, no, it's alright," Farah promised. "I'm just a bit tired, that's all."

"Okay…" Aiki looked down at the ground, seeming pretty tired as well. "I just feel like I blew any chance with him…"

"You never know," Farah remarked. "Maybe you could try talking to him again. When it's in a more isolated spot. Just the two of you. That might go over better." Another memory tugged in her mind, and this one caused her to smile.

"I-I dunno… I don't think I could really ever face him again…" Aiki sighed, closing their eyes. "I dunno how exactly I'm supposed to continue living after that."

Farah shook her head. "Look at me," she ordered firmly.

Aiki looked up at Farah weakly, clearly reluctant and very frustrated with himself.

"Even if he doesn't like you, which I highly doubt, you cannot base your self-worth, value, or life off of another person. Do you understand me?"

Aiki turned his ears back and looked away, their eyes stinging with tears. "I'm just… mortified. I-I dunno how I could face any of them again…"

Farah sighed. "I've had those thoughts too. Believe me. It's not easy. But you can do it."

"Like, I-I still have to see them later today, and tomorrow, and the day after… after saying that…" Aiki buried their face in their hands, trembling.

"Aiki, you think I don't understand, but I do," Farah promised. "Maybe if you talked with Oukami one-on-one, you could maybe get the ball rolling. Or at the very least, smooth things over with him so you're not embarrassed anymore."

"Mmmmmmnh… no, no, no… I-I can't talk to him… I can't talk to him…" Aiki whined shakily, keeping their face hidden. "I'm just gonna drop out of school and become a hermit and never talk to anybody ever again…"

"I'm afraid you can't do that," Farah objected, glancing around in search of Eiji. "I don't think that's ever worked out well for anyone in the past."

Eiji seemed to be occupied with another student at the moment, and he was too far away to be able to see Farah and Aiki particularly well. Aiki seemed to be getting stressed again, and they were clearly upset. "But I can't stay… I'm sure they're gonna tell everyone and I'm gonna get bullied or something…"

"No, you won't," Farah refuted again. She looked at Eiji again, and her eyes glowed as she projected an image of Aiki into his mind.

Eiji's ears pricked up and he looked around, seeming confused for a moment until he spotted Aiki pretty far off with Farah. Noticing Aiki's posture, he started to head over. Aiki's breathing was growing more shallow and raspy, and they were trembling a bit.

"Eiji's on his way," Farah said, looking from Eiji to his twin. "It's going to be alright."