miri!
do your schoolwork aha <3

yes i am aha, last term of year 9

huh. weird

i dont live in the u.s. so we dont do homecoming or whatever else you guys do aha

yes i am aha, last term of year 9

huh. weird

i dont live in the u.s. so we dont do homecoming or whatever else you guys do aha

gotcha

I already have so much homework and it's literally second period. I don't wanna do any of it.

IM ON HOLIDAYS BY THE END OF TODAY AND IM SO EXCITED!!

_{also I think I finally figured out what’s wrong with me, why I’ve been so miserable, and how to fix it…}

tell us whats up hun <3

Alright I’m just gonna scream it from the rooftops

I HAVE BEEN MANIPULATED AND EMOTIONALLY ABUSED FOR MONTHS AND I CANNOT BELIEVE IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO REALIZE

I’ve spent so much time trying to improve myself for the sake of these people, I gave up on my dreams, my beliefs, I changed my entire personality, I abandoned my positive mindset, and after giving up on so much I fell into all sorts of terrible, self-destructive habits to try to fill the void…
and somehow I only now realized this was hurting me.

All those days where I feel unbelievably happy for seemingly no reason? They all conveniently happened to be days where I, due to certain events or distractions, didn’t speak to these people, didn’t repeat to myself all the insults and slurs they threw at me, and didn’t beat myself up over them.

I am done letting them tear me apart. D o n e.

_{knowing me, I’ll probably end up forgiving them again in like a day and repeating this abusive cycle, but maybe now that I’ve said something out loud I might finally regain the strength to not do that…? I don’t know, I only got 5 hours of sleep last night my brain isn’t working}

I’M GOING TO REGRET VENTING THAT SOON BUT I’M SO TIRED THAT I DON’T GIVE A CARE

_{also I think I finally figured out what’s wrong with me, why I’ve been so miserable, and how to fix it…}

tell us whats up hun <3

Alright I’m just gonna scream it from the rooftops

I HAVE BEEN MANIPULATED AND EMOTIONALLY ABUSED FOR MONTHS AND I CANNOT BELIEVE IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO REALIZE

I’ve spent so much time trying to improve myself for the sake of these people, I gave up on my dreams, my beliefs, I changed my entire personality, I abandoned my positive mindset, and after giving up on so much I fell into all sorts of terrible, self-destructive habits to try to fill the void…
and somehow I only now realized this was hurting me.

All those days where I feel unbelievably happy for seemingly no reason? They all conveniently happened to be days where I, due to certain events or distractions, didn’t speak to these people, didn’t repeat to myself all the insults and slurs they threw at me, and didn’t beat myself up over them.

I am done letting them tear me apart. D o n e.

_{knowing me, I’ll probably end up forgiving them again in like a day and repeating this abusive cycle, but maybe now that I’ve said something out loud I might finally regain the strength to not do that…? I don’t know, I only got 5 hours of sleep last night my brain isn’t working}

omg babe im so sorry, you dont deserve any of that!

i get how that feels, only it took me YEARS to figure it out

it'll all be okay, we are here to support you and we all love you <3<3

I’M GOING TO REGRET VENTING THAT SOON BUT I’M SO TIRED THAT I DON’T GIVE A CARE

no, you won't regret it, i promise!

Forgive them, but don't let them keep hurting you <3 ilysm babe did I just say babe? Y'all are rubbing off on me

did I just say babe? Y'all are rubbing off on me

YES! we will dominate aha

Does anyone else think about death

Thank you guys so much <3 <3 <3

_{There’s still this corner of my brain that refuses to believe that I don’t deserve every single hateful word but I’m going to try and ignore it for the first time in months…}

_{what is homecoming??}

My homecoming is tomorrow.

Does anyone else think about death

yes all the time. actually its one of the highlights of being depressed and being used your whole life by fake friends {only talking about the bad ones} and bad family bonds.

I think everyone thinks about death at some point in time

I mean all the time, but thanks for responding

yeah, but weirdly enough i have a bond with more dead people than living. i can hold a conversation with spirits that enter my body on Halloween and other late night stuff.

Me: this is gross I don't like it I'm not eating it
My mom: puts it in my lunch every day for several weeks
I haven't had anything for lunch all week except applesauce. -.-

did I just say babe? Y'all are rubbing off on me

YES! we will dominate aha

mwahahahHAHA

There are bugs everywhere and it is not okay

Oh gosh not the bugs

I hate outside

Hey Ella.
You're beautiful.
You don't need to bend over backwards just to please these people. You're already really, really amazing! I think you should forgive them. But keep your distance

Thank you, Shuri <3