forum “I can’t love you...” Reposting this here (O/O|Romance|Closed|)

Started August 10, 2019 by @Toxic_Persephone group

tune

She buried her face in his neck, sighing. “We may be legally married but we’re not… close.” She murmured sadly, sighing as she breathed him in.

He held her, rubbing her back. He sighed. "I know. I'm sorry." He shook his head slightly. His eyes landed on the picture of Peri, and he sighed. He reached out and flipped the photo so that it was facing downward.

Arabella’s eyes flew open at the sound of the photo being flipped over. “Why did you do that…?” She asked him softly. “You can leave his photo up. Don’t forget him… don’t feel like you have to hide me from the idea of him. I know how much he meant to you.”

He rubbed his face. "No, it's…I don't know." He sighed. "It's my fault that this marriage isnt…close. Because I'm still stuck on someone that's been dead for a year. The fact that i have his photo and not yours doesn't help anything." He replied, closing his eyes.

“Don’t think that way Asher.” She cupped his face and pressed their foreheads together. “It’s hard to move on from someone you loved… It’s only been a year. That’s little to no time for you to heal. You were thrown into this too quickly. We both were. You can keep his photo. You can still… still love him.” She released him before sighing and tucking herself away again. That was hard for her to get out. She herself didn’t want to say it.

He shook his head. "I…my parents made it clear a long time ago that I should have already moved on. The entire world thinks that you and I had a whirlwind romance. Hell, I…I probably would have married him if…" He shook his head. "And my parents knew that and they didn't want their son marrying a man, so they got rid of him." He blinked, eyes going wide. "Shit, I'm sorry. I-I shouldn't have said that. I'm sorry."

She sat up straight suddenly, grabbing his face. “Your parents got rid of him!? They killed him?” She asked, her pace going pale. “You can’t keep that to yourself… that’s not right! It’s- it’s not humane… I would have refused to marry you at the time if I had known, so you could go after another man. So you could have had a second chance.”

"No! No, i…" He shook his head. "It was a car accident. But Peri was…he was always such a careful driver. I told him once that he drove like a grandma. And that's what never made sense. It was a t bone accident. He hit someone straight on. But…he never would have done that and, well…" He shook his head. "Just the way my parents would talk about the accident. I haven't any proof. Besides." He gave a small smile. "I might not have gone after another man. I'm not gay." He forced a chuckle. "I'm pan."

Arabella wasn’t convinced. She suddenly brought his lips to her’s, giving him a quick kiss to get his attention and maybe a lot little because she wanted to. “Listen to me, if you ever find out your parents did anything to sabotage your relationship with Peri, you need to keep away from them. That’s not healthy, nor good.” She murmured, her eyes wide and fearful. “I don’t want them hurting you, Asher.” She mumbled soon after, nuzzling into his cheek. “Pan or not, I’m still worried about you Asher. But thank you for telling me that. I’m glad I can get to know you more. I hadn’t know before that you were pan. I- Don’t exactly know what I am. I was never given the chance to find out.”

He shrugged slightly. "There's a reason I don't visit them unless I have to, Arabella." He replied, closing his eyes. Truth be told, he enjoyed the kiss. He raised his eyebrows slightly. "Wait, did you assume I was gay this whole time, just because of Peri?" He opened an eye and looked at her.

“I advise you keep doing that…” she murmured softly. Arabella blushed lightly at his next words, looking away. “Maybe just a little bit… I assumed it was why you didn’t seem too interested in me.” She played with his tie to distract herself and to avoid his eye. “Sorry… I didn’t mean to assume anything.”

He nodded. "I will." At her next words, he chuckled softly. "I don't mind. It's fine." He replied, kissing her forehead. "But no, for future reference, I am not gay." He chuckled again.

She laughed softly, tangling her fingers back into his hair. Soft… “So you don’t completely regret or hate the fact we married…” she sighed in relief once again, this time more dramatic to let him know her words were joking, and not completely serious. “I like you Asher.” She murmured softly, pressing her face into his neck and breathing him in. “If not as a husband, then as a friend.”

Asher nodded, humming softly for a moment. "Well, good." He replied with a chuckle. He kissed her cheek softly. "And no, I don't regret or hate the fact that we are married." He held her close, closing his eyes again.

She hummed happily, kissing his jaw softly in return. “You’re so kind, Asher.” She purred, wrapping her arms around his chest.

He smiled slightly, running his hands through her hair again. "Thanks." He replied, closing his eyes and holding her close.

“That feels good.” She murmured, giggling softly as she was held closer. “And you’re so warm.”

He chuckled. "Mm." He kissed her cheek softly, still holding her. His hands skimmed up and down her back, still running through her hair a little.

Her hands gently rubbed aloe circles into his back, a soft smile upon her lips. It felt good to be held in such a way.

He closed his eyes for a moment, enjoying the feeling of her hands on his back. He kept skimming his hands up and down her back lightly, smiling.

She stretched out her torso, gasping softly as his fingers ran over a sensitive patch of back. Arabella laughed, nuzzling him softly. “That tickled.”

He chuckled. "You mean this?" He did it again, his fingers dancing across her skin lightly. He smiled, pressing a kiss to her cheek again.

She squeaked softly, squirming in his arms. “Asher that tickles.” She repeated herself, blushing at the kiss and hiding her face from him.

He laughed, and did it again, then moved on, hands just lightly skimming up and down her back. He looked down at her with a small smile.

This time Arabella squealed, trying to press herself into his chest. “Nooo.” She complained, giggling softly and remaining tense as he ran his fingers along her back. A smile played on her lips as she tried to look seriously up at him. “You’re dancing on a thin edge, Asher. I can’t say you won’t get any injuries from tickling me.”