My mom is emotionally immature and it’s frustrating because I know that she knows what resources are beneficial for her to work through her traumas (ie THERAPY). She used to go to therapy and she was doing well, and I could see marked improvement in her behavior and general disposition. She was more secure in who she really and truly is and not the various personas she slips into. I liked it. She was more calm. Then she stopped going for pretty much no reason. Maybe she got scared of progress, of having to un-repress memories and really think about her issues, which is understandable, and if it didn’t further impact her day-to-day life and her behaviors then I wouldn’t care; however, the way she acts impacts the way she parents which impacts the way I develop. It also impacts our relationship. Right now, it feels damaged. As much as I love my mom because she has done some really baller things for me, she has also pulled some Grade A Bullshit during my life that just wasn’t necessary. She acts likes there’s nothing wrong with her so she doesn’t see any reason to try to grow as a person. It’s really frustrating because I have to live with her, and I will be affected by her decisions for a long time, in some cases all my life. I wish she would listen.
Mmmmm don't leave us hanging
So I had to leave early because it was 83 heccing degrees in there (and stuffy) and I overheated and threw up in the bathroom
So not the best first day. I think it's pretty funny tho
Oh god - I hope you feel better - can't you eat the ice cream though?
I feel fine now actually. And yeah, technically, but I don't want to just eat all the ice cream. My friend works there too and said it was like, 90 degrees (Fahrenheit) when he came in last
That's good… you should eat the ice cream when you feel yourself overheating. And oof.
Yeah, maybe me almost passing out will be incentive to fix the damn thing faster
Aren't most ice cream places…. cold?
They're supposed to be lol
It's supposed to be in the sixties (again, Fahrenheit) but the ac isn't working, so it hovered around mid eighties while I was there
Yeah. I'm alright now tho
Aw Caustic well I hops things get better for you sweetpea!
Today is off to an absolutely terrible start and I honestly don’t know what to do anymore
Why's it off to such a horrific start?
It’s quite pathetic but… Well… I have possibly the most boring, repetitive life ever with basically no hobbies because my parents don’t have the time, money, or space to let me do really anything other than hide in my room drawing. If I want to do anything else, I have to find/buy the materials needed by myself, teach myself, make time for stuff myself, and be completely responsible for everything all by myself. The moment I have to get my parents or siblings involved is the moment I lose that hobby completely…
Well, I’d finally found something new to try so I’m not constantly in a state of complete boredom, and that was making polymer clay sculptures. I made two little figurines that looked kinda awful, but I was really happy with them… Until this morning, when my mom had to bake them. The first figure, a chibi sculpture of Hatsune Miku, decided it wanted to fall apart into 8,000 little pieces. I was able to salvage most of the clay since it wasn’t baked yet, but the figure itself was toast… My mom went to bake the second figure, but she didn’t quite understand that it was supposed to stand up, and laid it down during the baking process, breaking off a leg and the bottom of the cape. I might be able to glue her back together, but she’s not going to be able to stand or really do anything…
So both of my figures were destroyed, about 16+ hours of work went completely down the drain, now my mom’s upset with me for leaving her responsible for my own creations, and since I’m not allowed to use the oven, I can’t make clay stuff anymore.
I shouldn’t be this upset by something so small yet here I am…
Aw sis, that sucks SO HARD. One of my drawings got erased after I was like 5 minutes away from being done with it, and I got so frustrated I had to go lay down. And I only spent about an hour on that drawing, so I can't even imagine how difficult that must be for you.
They’ve been quite angry with me about how lazy, unproductive, and antisocial I’ve been recently, since all I ever do is sit around in my room drawing. But when I try to find something else to do, it never works out because despite what they seem to think, I can’t do everything by myself. I can’t drive myself to dance lessons nor can I pay for them, I can’t buy myself an instrument to learn, I can’t set up air conditioning in the garage just to have space to paint or sew, I can’t simply walk myself to the nearest pet shelter to volunteer, I can’t drive myself to a friend’s house to socialize, I can’t build a room to exercise in.
What I can do, however, is sit around in my room drawing, but that’s not enough apparently…
Maybe you could find a place within walking distance to meet a friend for food or something or see if they're parent could drive you
I’m feeling a bit better now though, my puppy Leo found a lil butterfly and he’s so happy it’s making me happy~
What a good boy =)
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