forum No Judgement Zone: Say What You Like About Yourself, What You Hate About Yourself, Your Insecurities, Weird Stuff You Do, Etc. Nobody Will Judge.

Started February 25, 2019 by Deleted user

tune

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Just pop in at your leisure and ask to talk.

I know I'm being difficult when I say this but that is literally something that I can't do because I get anxious about it. It's honestly just how I live and something I don't know how to change so ¯\ _ (ツ) _ /¯

I know I'm being difficult when I say this but that is literally something that I can't do because I get anxious about it. It's honestly just how I live and something I don't know how to change so ¯\ _ (ツ) _ /¯

Sometimes you just have to get out of your comfort zone. It helped me. But do it in a safe manner that doesn't cause panic attacks.

I hate how I can’t stick to something because I’m depressed.

Iwisheveryonewouldntalwaysactthewaytheydoandidontknowwhybutitbothersme
There's this girl
Let's call her A
And she will literally be the one who takes me last nerve and stomps on it

Is it possible to feel so sick mentally (like depressed and or anxious) to the point where you feel like throwing up and have a fever?

You never know, might be possible, might not.

Is it possible to feel so sick mentally (like depressed and or anxious) to the point where you feel like throwing up and have a fever?

Yes.

Is it possible to feel so sick mentally (like depressed and or anxious) to the point where you feel like throwing up and have a fever?

I feel like that always, that’s probably why I do get sick so much…

Idk, I've been feeling like that lately

It’s a normal feeling everyone suffer from if they ever experienced depression. It’s something I feel lots of times. It’s normal.

Is it possible to feel so sick mentally (like depressed and or anxious) to the point where you feel like throwing up and have a fever?

That's happened to me.

You know what I wish? I wish I could finally grow up. I wish I was old enough to go places, I wish I was smart enough to not embarrass myself every single day, I wish I was strong enough to take insults and criticism without losing my pancaking mind or having an entire meltdown, I wish I was talented enough to make my little dreams a reality, I wish I was mature enough to be taken seriously, I wish I was skilled enough to actually help people, I wish I was confident enough to speak without stressing over each individual word, I wish I was interesting enough to fit in without feeling like an annoyance, and I wish I was capable enough to improve myself in these ways. But unfortunately, I'm also not old enough. No matter how hard I try, I'll never be able to accomplish my goals, as small as they may be. Not until I'm an adult.

I'm sick of counting the days going by. I'm sick of sitting around, wasting precious moments. I'm sick of being told that these are the "good ol' days", what's so good about being trapped in a house, unable to make your own decisions, lacking most of your freedom, watching, waiting, hoping for the day when you can finally get out and surround yourself with the people/places/things you actually care about?
I know, "some people have it way worse than you, Ella. You're extremely lucky, why are you complaining?"
And to be honest, I'm not sure. I don't know why I'm this weak, I don't know why I'm unhappy, I don't know what's wrong, I don't know why I keep complaining, and I sure as blep don't know why it only started affecting me a few months ago. All I know is, despite my efforts, I haven't been able to change it. I'm unhappy, even if it's pathetic/childish, and I don't know how to make it stop.

…I'm glad I got that off my chest. I'm not looking for pity, I'm not saying this to start an argument, I'm not trying to be the overdramatic teen who has no idea what she's talking about. I just wanted to speak my mind without feeling like a big ball of absolute regret, which is something I haven't been able to do in a long time (mostly due to my own fears and problems). Thank you for listening, I appreciate it, I hope you have a wonderful day.<3

I read it.

I wish I wasn't on a suicide watch type thing.

You're on 51/50???

You're on 51/50???

No, I'm on my mother's version.
Every time I'm in my house alone she has cameras watching me and making sure I don't do anything.

You're on 51/50???

No, I'm on my mother's version.
Every time I'm in my house alone she has cameras watching me and making sure I don't do anything.

That's why I said type of.

That sounds rough.

That sounds rough.

Not really, it only makes me feel bad because my mum is being extra caring and kind and I don't know how to deal with that.

It's not very different from how my life usually is, but my mum is more caring now.

It's good to hear that.

I can't see really how that is a bad thing. I mean it could keep any impulse in check and if something were to happen she would be able to react right away. Most people that are actually on 51/50 appreciate that kind of assistance. (I've known & worked with a few)

I can't see really how that is a bad thing. I mean it could keep any impulse in check and if something were to happen she would be able to react right away. Most people that are actually on 51/50 appreciate that kind of assistance. (I've known & worked with a few)

Yeah… I guess. It's just that she's almost never nice to me and I don't know how to react.

Just be yourself, if she doesn't like that then whatever, she doesn't have a say in your personality. She will have to get used to it eventually.
In the end it doesn't matter.