@Fraust
(Oof that sucks. Hope things get better for you <33)
(Oof that sucks. Hope things get better for you <33)
(Thanks. They got mad at me for making the sandwiches wrong. Um, I tried, okay? I got told to shut up four times at the table for not saying anything wrong and trying to apologize or explain myself, and it took me ten minutes to get excused. They also wanted me to eat more than I wanted. {It's not even that I wasn't hungry. I was, but I hate dealing with them that much} They say that I'm going to go nowhere in life because they don't know what I'd be capable of, and they generally act like my mental disorders are my own fault. Okay then…)
(Aa, I know how that feels with the mental disorders T^T, it sucks. People constantly tell me to just 'think happy thoughts' and I'll magically get better? Like, sorry babe, that's not how depression works. And whenever I say I feel anxious, people are like "what are you anxious about?? There's not even anything stressful right now" and like, my anxiety is kinda a constant thing?? I'm not usually stressed about something in particular, just anxious in general qwq. But yeah, I know how it feels, and I'm sorry <333)
(Like, um, sure, my predetermined mental issues and lack of insurance are my fault. No, they're not. I'd be on medication for my autism, ADHD, whatever manic mood disorder I have, etc. if it wouldn't be over $700 a month without insurance. Yeah, if we were to spend that much monthly on medicine, I'd just order BTS concert tickets a lot because mine cost like $800 for one time with two people for good seats and ordered slightly in advance. {My mother thinks it's ridiculous, but they're the world's biggest boy band and need the money to travel somehow} BTS obsession aside, except for they are my mental help, I hate my grandparents sometimes. They freaking hate me sometimes, scold me for nothing, and act like my issues are my own fault. I have "help", it's just called those seven Korean boys I idolize and look up to. Like, maybe you could help me cook instead of hate me, and maybe not say that my issues are my fault!)
(Yeah :') I remember it took three years before my parents even noticed anything was up because I'd been mentioning feeling anxious or something. They had no clue about the depression and they were saying I shouldn't have been affected so much?? Like, ho, I was eleven and suddenly my sister tries to kill herself and is no longer living in our house for a while?? I feel like I'm allowed to be upset?? Pretty sure I kinda always had anxiety tho)
(Sometimes family members are incredibly stupid… I started getting diagnosed with stuff at like ten {took them – not my parents, but the professionals – long enough} Then my mood disorder and autism weren't diagnosed until last year when I was in that place for threatening to kill someone. {I was not having it that day…} So, simply, I'm a psycho and BTS is most likely the only reason I haven't murdered or tried to murder my grandparents – or certain classmates – yet… So, thanks to them for the mental help, because I get more from them than people, and this is a general rant now)
(Yeah… I'm probably a psychopath but my mooom doesn't believe me :) she's like "you don't show any of the signs" and I'm over here, lying to her throughout the entire conversation, and feeling absolutely no guilt?? Idk man, I guess I'm just a good liar because they didn't know about any of my problems for years haha :))) love my family so much)
(Like, yes, I know that I'm crazy. When I'm angry, I will literally start strategically plotting murders to not get caught, so my logic is still somewhat intact, but very messed up. Then if I'm not near people, I will literally stab my sketchbook to death while still planning people's murders. Like, I'm crazy, and if BTS didn't exist… um… I'd probably be in a lot of trouble for murder by now…)
(Yeah same lol but I don't have BTS so I guess I just have some good self control)
(I mean, BTS is my coping mechanism, since I'm a huge fan. Wait, isn't that obvious? This account is practically Jin's social media account if he had one…)
(Yeah I can tell you're a fan lol. I just don't really know anything about BTS and boy bands aren't really my thing. You like what you like, though, I'm not here to judge)
(It's fine! BTS is my life and my help! I'm having a bad day? BTS songs and videos! I need to rant? Rant to my phone/laptop wallpaper! {usually set to Jin, but that's my friend's decisions, though I am Jin-biased, obviously…} If only those boys knew how much they've helped me…)
(No problem <33)
(Anyways, since I'm not mad anymore, give me a sec to continue the rp)
"Well, thanks for that, Logan! Give it to me when you've got it, okay? Then I'll read it and we can continue discussing it together like we have been!" Patton said.
Logan nodded. "I can pick it up when I go to the library tomorrow. You can come with if you're willing to wake up that early."
"Okay, Logan! I can't wait to read it with you! We should be able to have some good discussions about it, too!" Patton said.
"Indeed. Is there anything else you want to talk about, Patton?" He asked.
"Not that I can think about…" Patton said. He truly didn't, but his feelings for Logan still being a secret was annoying him.
Logan nodded and looked at his watch. "Alright, then. I will retire to my room to study. See you tomorrow, Patton." He stood up and left the room.
Patton decided to go to his own room, not really knowing what else to do until the next day, so he laid on his bed and thought about things, which were mostly either animals or Logan.
Logan studied into the small hours of the morning, a loud thud eventually resonating from his room when he passed out from exhaustion.
Patton was oddly enough awake with not having anything to do. He had never fallen asleep, though he was lost in daydreams most of the time. He heard the loud thud and immediately rushed into Logan's room to see him passed out on the floor. He was panicking slightly, but he picked Logan up and laid him down on his bed, not knowing what else to do other than to try and figure out why Logan had passed out.
Logan was dead asleep at this point, his breathing slow and easy. He seemed to be overall okay other than overworking himself. He hadn't slept in days in favor of using the time to study.
Patton was still visibly worried about him, and he would've gotten any of the others but he didn't want to disturb their sleep when he knew that they'd probably be either confused or too tired to deal with this. He looked at Logan, who was now asleep, and a couple of tears formed in his eyes due to the worry. "Logan… I-I hope that you're okay…"
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