@phoenixwing group
Could you do my baby Stormchaser? He's from the Monster Hunter series, none of my characters are human beings XD Invalid Character
Could you do my baby Stormchaser? He's from the Monster Hunter series, none of my characters are human beings XD Invalid Character
This looks so cool! Here’s my favorite character of mine heh. Thank you for any response in advance. Crystal Anne Carson
NAME
Aric Matthias Summer
ROLE
Protagonist
OTHER NAMES
Cat Boy (Violet), Matt (Derek, Arnie and Everyone else pretty much)
GENDER
Male
AGE
15 1/5
UNIVERSE
Demon Mind
HEIGHT
5'5
HAIR COLOR
Brown
HAIR STYLE
thick batch of hair on his head, after it was messed up it was half shaved
FACIAL HAIR
none
EYE COLOR
Golden
RACE
Mutant
SKIN TONE
tan
BODY TYPE
short and small but can move very fast
IDENTIFYING MARKS
scars, his pupils change depending on his mood like a cats.
MANNERISMS
Aric talks with hand gestures alot
MOTIVATIONS
when his friends or family is in danger
FLAWS
Stubborn, Rebellious, Dyslexic (I think that comes under flaws?), Fierce,
PREJUDICES
(I think this is the not flaws of his character) Protective, Kind (to certain people), charismatic, sarcastic/Sassy (i don't know if that is a good thing or a flaw??)
TALENTS
he can jump really high, Parkour, he knows how to fight, he can draw really well.
HOBBIES
Aric likes to Draw or mess around on his phone
BIRTHDAY
August 21 2006
EDUCATION
year 9 in school (drop out)
YES this is open again! I didn't have the chance before to give you my boi Knox, but can you do him now?
Also, I'm @TheOpenerOfWays and @WepwawetWrites changed it twice bc I'm now obsessed with yet another ancient egyptian god…
hello again! I'd be happy to rate Knox, too!
Overview - 89/100
so his other name is basically his actual name
Looks - 90/100
what exactly is a Physic?
oh I like it how he behaves with his insignia. I wonder what does it look like
Nature - 87/100
perfectly written mannerisms
perfect motivations
I'd write more flaws
his hobby sounds more like a mannerism. try to write about something he enjoys doing everyday. apart from this field, everything is fine!
Social - 94/100
"Same as Cass and Abigail". so, what religion? it's his page, so tell about him and not others
that's a specific color
Spirits/ghosts known - 99/100
"almost"? is there a reason?
but what's an Astral?
Quotes - 100/100
oh I love these
Backstory - 87/100
yes I'll finally know what Physics are. I think you should describe them earlier or make a reference mark
wow, I love seeing other people's creativity
is there any further backstory? maybe try to foreshadow what happens in your book (or whatever you're writing)
Knox is surely a well-developed character! I love seeing such elaborated personalities, it helps me relate to them more and understand them better. overall, there's nothing bad here! things that you can add to improve him are a little bit more information about his backstory and personality (but leave the mannerisms!), and correction of some minor mistakes ^-^
average - 92/100
Knox is:
78% likely to be my friend
65% likely to by my lover
98% likely to be my party member
34% likely to be my enemy
hey there my dude! i've got a villain for you: madeline
Oooh! Here's my baby, please rate her: K.T. (Katy Lynx)
hello! I don't know if this is interesting but I'm excited to rate the first character with a new page design!
Overview - 88/100
that's a clever name!
Green Bean I love this one
who's Zira. I need to know more about them.
Looks - 93/100
neon green? now I know where the Bean came from
alien? that's a surprise!
I like that you described her race more as well as her relationship with others
woah the hair is also a surprise
Nature - 80/100
I'd write more mannerisms
every major point here is covered. you've written already every important thing about her, but I'd write more. what are her virtues? does she have any particular goals?
History - 75/100
I see nothing to change here, I assume every major event is said. her history is rather spare, but it is enough, if there's nothing more to write about!
Social - 90/100
so Zira's her arch-enemy. interesting
Family - 100/100
okay I adopted Alberto
Sexuality - 98/100
nods with acknowledgement
Abilities -100/100
I like her powers!
I wonder how much she eats
I'm impressed with the thought you put into her abilities! the weaknesses are logical, and create a good counterweight. she really is a well-balanced hero!
Fears - 99/100
you don't have to change anything here, but personally I think this section would suit better under "Nature".
K.T. has some really good abilities, as I said. she's definitely ready to be put in a story. she could use some more development to make her seem like a real person, but if you're just beginning your plot, this information should be enough! I once again deeply bow to her abilities and I hope that you'll someday write a great story about her!
average - 91/100
K.T. is:
56% likely to be my friend
23% likely to by my lover
89% likely to be my party member
78% likely to be my enemy
Wonder if you could do my character
Hey! If you get the time to do so I would love a critique of my man Vincent :)
Here’s Baney boi to rate
baney boi it sounds so cute
Overview - 98/100
Malice is an interesting surname
you've written about his name etymology, that's so cool! because I assume you misspelled "etymology"
baney boiii
a hellhound? that's even more interesting
Looks - 95/100
there are kilograms there are feet there are inches but where are the centimeters
heterochromia is neat
wow the things that make him stand out are really imaginative! the claws, his face features - I love them
doesn't look like his smile is contagious but that's a big plus!
it would be nice if you also described his wolf form
Outfits - 100/100
that's a section I don't see often!
chef's kiss it's ideal
Nature - 100/100
this section is so developed. I haven't seen such detail in ages. I'm going to cry
strengths, weaknesses, middle ground - I love how you divided all three
wow this section is so perfect I'm out of compliments
I've watched the Salt and I am very grateful for this experience
Conditions - 100/100
it's my first time seeing someone lactose intolerant
I admire the detail put into this section as well!
Social - 96/100
I hope you'll write down the details of this religion someday
Family - how dare you/100
WHY IS CERBERUS DECEASED YOU MONSTER
Relationships - 98/100
ah. I like Slate.
History - 70/100
WELL THEN UN-LAZY YOURSELF
at least there's some major information here
I hope you won't forget about developing both these fields ^-^
Abilities - 100/100
shadow teleporting? I'm sensing Nico
I have no compliments left. Bane is such a developed, well-written character, that he makes my heart happy. whatever you're writing with him now, don't stop, because I want to see how you've described him in text. don't try to improve anything, because it's perfect as it is. but remember to finish his fields in history!
average - 95/100
Bane is:
78% likely to be my friend
26% likely to by my lover
91% likely to be my party member
67% likely to be my enemy
what a beautiful page, really ;-;
Overview - 98/100
Malice is an interesting surname
you've written about his name etymology, that's so cool! because I assume you misspelled "etymology"
baney boiii
a hellhound? that's even more interesting
I am bad at spelling. Yes, I meant etymology. Thank you
Looks - 95/100
there are kilograms there are feet there are inches but where are the centimeters
heterochromia is neat
wow the things that make him stand out are really imaginative! the claws, his face features - I love them
doesn't look like his smile is contagious but that's a big plus!
it would be nice if you also described his wolf form
I knew something was missing. For some reason my brain said inches! Thank you again. Bane tries to look serious, but he can't hold it for long
Nature - 100/100
this section is so developed. I haven't seen such detail in ages. I'm going to cry
strengths, weaknesses, middle ground - I love how you divided all three
wow this section is so perfect I'm out of compliments
I've watched the Salt and I am very grateful for this experience
No! Don't cry pulls out a handkerchief it'll be okay. Yes…salt. Thank you, I always find filling out nature to be the hardest of the sections
Family - how dare you/100
WHY IS CERBERUS DECEASED YOU MONSTER
Eek! I'M SORRY, BUT HE HAD TO GO
Abilities - 100/100
perfect
shadow teleporting? I'm sensing Nico
Yes! Nico! He's the only character dear to my heart. A huge inspiration for my development of Bane
I have no compliments left. Bane is such a developed, well-written character, that he makes my heart happy. whatever you're writing with him now, don't stop, because I want to see how you've described him in text. don't try to improve anything, because it's perfect as it is. but remember to finish his fields in history!
average - 95/100
Thank you. He's bound to appear in chapter two, maybe a sneak peck in chapter one of Twisted Truths. He's probably one of my favorite characters to write. I'll try to fill out his history, I promise
what a beautiful page, really ;-;
Thank you. Bane is also my most developed page because page development takes long and school is hella annoying. I usually pick a character of the week to work on. I'm really glad you enjoyed his page :3 I just— thank you. I also had a blast reading this
of course I'd like
Overview - 98/100
okay first of all I love the name I'd name my child like this if I had one, and yes I would change my last name to Atwood if this was necessary
Looks - 88/100
not much detail here, nothing to comment
Nature - 77/100
to find her brother? we're getting deeper
not much information here, but enough to begin writing
Social - 80/100
oh, who's Tori?
History - 79/100
her brother's abduction? it should have made a great impact on her. maybe you could add how did she feel during this event?
hm, Allison seems like a pretty average character for a secondary protagonist. there's just so little information on her page. she definitely needs more development if she's going to be a major part of the plot. try to have a conversation with her! ask her thoroughly about her childhood, her passions, her plans for the future. I hope that as you write more of this story, you'll see how Allison changes and you'll write down more about her!
average - 84/100
Allison is:
66% likely to be my friend
34% likely to by my lover
50% likely to be my party member
42% likely to be my enemy
Hello again! hehehe I've got another one for you…. Here's my boi Raef
did his backstory in a bit of a rush it won't be as good as my other backstories
have fun with the soup devil
of course I'd like
Overview - 98/100
okay first of all I love the name I'd name my child like this if I had one, and yes I would change my last name to Atwood if this was necessaryLooks - 88/100
not much detail here, nothing to commentNature - 77/100
to find her brother? we're getting deeper
not much information here, but enough to begin writingSocial - 80/100
oh, who's Tori?History - 79/100
her brother's abduction? it should have made a great impact on her. maybe you could add how did she feel during this event?hm, Allison seems like a pretty average character for a secondary protagonist. there's just so little information on her page. she definitely needs more development if she's going to be a major part of the plot. try to have a conversation with her! ask her thoroughly about her childhood, her passions, her plans for the future. I hope that as you write more of this story, you'll see how Allison changes and you'll write down more about her!
average - 84/100Allison is:
66% likely to be my friend
34% likely to by my lover
50% likely to be my party member
42% likely to be my enemy
Tysm! I've been trying to develop her recently, but she's been a tough character to work with. I'll definitely take your idea of having a conversation with her in mind.
Hmmm…I’d like to see how you think of this rat man
Could you do my baby Stormchaser? He's from the Monster Hunter series, none of my characters are human beings XD Invalid Character
IS IT A DRAGON IS IT A DRAGON
Overview - 88/100
Stormy sounds so cute ^-^
Looks - 73/100
that's a very specific name for a race. maybe you could describe it? what do the members look like or how do they differentiate from others? it would be nice to have this information here.
there's still so many things to write about! any identifying marks? weight? maybe length? there's enough to imagine him, but more information would definitely give me a clearer picture
Nature - 68/100
"fur turns a darker shade when angry" I really like this one a lot! it makes him very unique!
there isn't much information here either! write some examples of situations when his personality traits show up! define his virtues, his goals, and definitely more flaws! have a conversation, fill some questionaries - make him overflow with strengths and weaknesses resulting from them! I'm sure that with some work you'll be able to write about him more
Stormchaser definitely needs more development! keep in mind what I said, and find some time to write down everything you know about him! if he's a minor character, he won't need as much information as a protagonist, of course. but if he's still more important than some background characters, well-balanced strengths and weaknesses are always welcome
average - 76/100
Stormchaser is:
45% likely to be my friend
12% likely to by my lover
73% likely to be my party member
69% likely to be my enemy
@Femboy I think your page is private. could you let me know when you make it public? I'll get back to it as soon as I'll be able to! ^-^
NAME
Aric Matthias Summer
for this one I'll try to separate this information into page sections, if I may ^-^
Overview - 89/100
cat boi
why does everyone call him by his middle name?
Looks - 93/100
golden eyes!
he's a Mutant? I'd like to see more description of this race
maybe you could describe his scars better? are they on his face or body? how did he get them?
Nature - 69/100
he needs more mannerisms!
I think "Dyslexic" is more of a condition
prejudices are that unfounded feelings (I think mostly negative but I've seen people write positive as well) that one experiences toward certain people. for example, someone may be negatively prejudiced against a vegan they've met just because they were raised in a community that hates vegans. that's the easiest way I can put it
so, I see Aric needs more work! you definitely want to develop him to make him a realistic character, since he's a protagonist. I always say to have a deep conversation with you characters, because I think it's the best way to get to know them better. I also recommend doing questionaries, and writing their backgrounds. what was Aric's childhood like? how did he get to the point at which he's now? did he make any friends? did he face any reversals, since he's a Mutant? what about his family? do they support him? if you have no ideas now, then go back to writing the actual story. as you push the plot forward, you'll surely find something new about Aric as you go!
average - 84/100
Aric is:
63% likely to be my friend
22% likely to by my lover
50% likely to be my party member
45% likely to be my enemy
@tomat Gah, I’m so sorry. I believe it’s public now. Thank you for informing me. ^^
This looks so cool! Here’s my favorite character of mine heh. Thank you for any response in advance. Crystal Anne Carson
everything is working now!
Overview - 90/100
"it isn’t abruptly stated" I'm really curious about this part. what does it mean exactly?
Looks - 87/100
dead stare, lifeless eyes… is she me?
nothing much elaborated, but enough!
Nature - 73/100
"forced to have them"? that's an interesting way to put it
but that doesn't really tell me what her flaws are
if she's forced to do those, can you really call them a hobby?
woah that's a miserable character
I think you could work on her personality more. explain more precisely what do you mean by "forced" to do something. I hope that this will be answered in her background. and I'd like to see her actual flaws!
Social - 84/100
a gang-member? never seen such characters before
WHY ARE ANIMALS STUPID TO HER WHY
I'd like to see such elaborated descriptions in every field in "Nature" as they're written in "Job"! everything here answers my every question that I'd have about her job. it's an exemplary field!
History - 89/100
why did they ran from the services?
oh I hope she gets better
Crystal has a good backstory, but her personality could use some more work. since she's your favorite character, and also a protagonist, I believe that you'll have no problem with that! and try to write her fields just as you wrote her "Job" field, I'll say that again because you really defined it well!
average - 85/100
Crystal is:
43% likely to be my friend
8% likely to by my lover
76% likely to be my party member
97% likely to be my enemy
This looks so cool! Here’s my favorite character of mine heh. Thank you for any response in advance. Crystal Anne Carson
everything is working now!
Overview - 90/100
"it isn’t abruptly stated" I'm really curious about this part. what does it mean exactly?Looks - 87/100
dead stare, lifeless eyes… is she me?
nothing much elaborated, but enough!Nature - 73/100
"forced to have them"? that's an interesting way to put it
but that doesn't really tell me what her flaws are
if she's forced to do those, can you really call them a hobby?
woah that's a miserable character
I think you could work on her personality more. explain more precisely what do you mean by "forced" to do something. I hope that this will be answered in her background. and I'd like to see her actual flaws!Social - 84/100
a gang-member? never seen such characters before
WHY ARE ANIMALS STUPID TO HER WHY
I'd like to see such elaborated descriptions in every field in "Nature" as they're written in "Job"! everything here answers my every question that I'd have about her job. it's an exemplary field!History - 89/100
why did they ran from the services?
oh I hope she gets betterCrystal has a good backstory, but her personality could use some more work. since she's your favorite character, and also a protagonist, I believe that you'll have no problem with that! and try to write her fields just as you wrote her "Job" field, I'll say that again because you really defined it well!
average - 85/100Crystal is:
43% likely to be my friend
8% likely to by my lover
76% likely to be my party member
97% likely to be my enemy
Hi! Thank you so much for the advice, it really helped. I did make some improvements, especially to the Nature slide. Obviously, I don’t want you to completely rerate it; I don’t want you to rate it all actually. But if you’d like to see the improvements and such; here you go, Crystal Anne Carson
Again, thank you so much for your time and please have a good day.
This is such a fun chat lol!!
Here's one of mine if you have time: https://www.notebook.ai/plan/characters/887960#
OooOooo this seems cool and fun! here's my Not Cool And Fun Boi
hey there my dude! i've got a villain for you: madeline
HELLO AGAIN
Overview - 93/100
Legion? and what's that?
I love the descriptions of her other names
Looks - 87/100
ooh! pink eyes!
metahuman? that sounds so cool give me more details
Nature - 88/100
her mannerisms are so unique! but still, I'd write one more, so as to meet my expectations
I'd still like to see her flaws named
that's a really creative talent!
who's Peter?
everything here is nice, but I'd like to see a tiny bit more detail. maybe elaborate her flaws and motivations more?
Social - 90/100
ANOTHER ONE WHO DISLIKES ANIMALS WHY
Peter? who's Peter
History - 68/100
I definitely need more of her background! it starts at 17, but what happened before? her childhood surely wasn't so insignificant. you could also write about what metahuman is here!
Playlist analysis - 100/100
try to describe her background with the same detail that you've put here!
Madeline. she's a good character, but she can be better! try to elaborate her fields, as I said, but apart from that, other things are fine! I love her design a lot, and I'd want to see her in action! I'd also like to know more about Peter, I might check him out later too ^-^
average - 88/100
Madeline is:
50% likely to be my friend
32% likely to by my lover
97% likely to be my party member
83% likely to be my enemy
Madeline. she's a good character, but she can be better! try to elaborate her fields, as I said, but apart from that, other things are fine! I love her design a lot, and I'd want to see her in action! I'd also like to know more about Peter, I might check him out later too ^-^
average - 88/100Madeline is:
50% likely to be my friend
32% likely to by my lover
97% likely to be my party member
83% likely to be my enemy
many thanks! I'll work on updating her, as well as my other characters because a lot of them are made similarly. here's peter if you wanted to check him out.
HECK YEAH THIS IS UP AGAIN
nice to see you again, Tide! I'm curious what you've prepared for me this time ^-^
Thank you so much for rating Monyi! I’m super glad you liked him — I meant to respond earlier, but I kept forgetting to do so. I won’t be responding to everything with the > thingamajoogles to conserve space for the rest of your awesome critiques, but I’d like you to know that I sincerely appreciate your critique of my character and I’m so, so happy that he was to your taste. I try my best to make them appealing :)
what’s a D-year?
A D-year is simply the measurement of years on Destrumes, an acronym for “Destrumes year.” I use these for all of my planets, like R-years for Reesflon and M-years for Myndun. I haven’t quite figured out how they translate to Earth years (E-years, if you will) yet, though. I planned to cover them in the Destrumes location section, but of course I haven’t made that yet. Guess I should get on that XD
everything is so detailed I love it I need to see him
You can see some pictures of him displayed here! Half of them are by my good Scratch friend Dog, half of them are by yours truly. :)
CHEESE
🧀 CHEEEEEEESE 🧀
I want to hear this language
Me too, buckaroo. XD I haven’t actually decided how it would sound yet, really, but I’d imagine it would be something of a pidgin crossbreed of the Clikorian quick, canine-esque barks and insectoid clicks and the more raspy and reptillian sounds of the Volcanum.
Again, thank you so much for rating him for me! I tried my best to make him the best he possibly can be — originally he was designed by Doggywoofwoo on Scratch, a good friend of mine to this date, and ever since I first laid eyes on him I knew he had to be mine. I’m so glad I was able to win him and kickstart the Clikor out of him to make him the character he is today. Thank you so much for your rating!
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