She looked away sadly. “If you find a mate, please, please divorce me and go after them, Asher. I can’t stand the thought that I’d be in between you and someone you love… you deserve so much more than me. My family can always marry me off to another man and they will for sure. You can find love and start a wonderful life for you. If one of us can, I want it to be you does it.” She murmured, looking up at him. “And this isn’t me wanting to be divorced. I don’t care because I’ll just end up with another man. But you have a chance at marrying a mate or someone you love.”
"Arabella." He said softly. "The only person I ever thought might be my mate was Peregrine Arestos, and…he's dead now. So. I have most likely missed my chance to ever have a mate, and I don't plan on falling in love anytime soon." He told her, glancing at her for a moment, then at the ceiling again.
“You don’t know that.” She said quietly. “Fate is strange in that way…” she hugged her knees to her chest. “I think you’ll be able to find someone to love someday. It might have been Peregrine who could have been your mate but fate always will let you have a second chance.” She told him softly. “I know you loved Peregrine… I know you loved him a lot… I’m sorry you lost him. I’m sorry you had to settle for me, I truly am. But don’t give up hope.”
This was a lot coming from the girl who had already given up hope. She would be married off again and again if she divorced over and over again. If Asher divorced her she would go to the next rich man willing to take her… even if that man was decades older than her. The first choice of a husband for her - so graciously picked by her father - was a near fifty-year-old man with a large sum of money and a fetish for young women…
Asher shook his head. "You know the reason I chose you? Out of all the people my parents found for me a few months ago?" He paused. "You were the only one who hadn't volunteered. You were the only one whose parent had done it for them. The only one that…" He shook his head. "I know what the upper class is like. And I keep if I hadn't picked you, some other man would have." He sat up. "And you won't ever love me. That's fine. I didn't want you to get stuck with someone terrible just because of your father."
Arabella shuddered, hugging herself. “I’m glad you chose me… I really am thankful for that too. The only other option wasn’t ideal…” her eyes moved to the window, staring out up at the sky. “You were the best candidate for this to me. It was one of the reasons I didn’t fight it. I knew if I ended up with you I wouldn’t have ended up with someone much older and much less caring about what I feel.”
Asher nodded. "Forgive my bluntness, but…I'm willing to guess that you're a virgin. That you've never…slept with anyone before, sexually. And in this class?" He shook his head. "You would have been eaten alive." He didn't look at her. "I mean… you and I will have to, er…do it eventually. But like I already said, I'll be as gentle as possible. Most men wouldn't. You would be lucky if they even made sure you were comfortable." There was something dark in his tone for a moment, as if he were remembering something foul.
Arabella grew shy at his question, nodding very slowly. “Yes… I am. I’ve never been touched by a man in such a way.” Her eyes fell to her feet. She knew what would have happened. She had gotten lucky… far too lucky for her own good.
“I know. I know I’m lucky for ending up with you too… you wouldn't force yourself on me. Nor would you be rough.” She flashed him a small smile. “You’re a good man, Asher. A good fae and a good person. I will willingly raise your child…” she said softly, dipping her head down respectfully. “It May be awkward for us, but I would still love that child.”
Asher nodded. "Yes. And Arabella? No matter what gender that child is…I'm going to teach them the tricks and trades of the company, so they can take over. I don't care what gender they are. They get an equal chance at getting the company when I'm gone." He didn't want to raise a daughter as a trophy wife. He wanted his child to have a choice, no matter what.
She smiled, tearing up slightly at his words. “Thank you…” She murmured softly, holding herself with a small and kind smile. “I’m glad we can at least talk with one another about these things. You’re giving me every bit of freedom and comfort I could ever need. No worries about a surprise or forced bedding and you even promised to be gentle, a room for my painting, a wonderful chance at freedom…”
Asher nodded. "You're welcome." He looked over at her. "I promised to be as gentle as possible. As a Fae… control is difficult. Because… physiology." He shook his head. "I can only promise to try." He sighed softly. "And you're always welcome to ask for anything else you need. Really. Or even if you just want something. Ask, and if I can give you it, you'll get it."
“I know, Asher. And I respect that. Even if you can’t be gentle completely I’ll still be thankful for you trying to be st least.” She smiled at him and gently touched his arm. “I’ll be alright. If I do need anything I’ll Be sure to tell you.” But she would be stubborn about it.
Asher nodded, then yawned. "Okay. I should head to bed." He said, giving her a small smile before standing up. "You can join me if you want, or stay here a bit longer. Your choice."
Arabella watched him, her eyes wide. “I’ll come and join you.” She murmured softly, standing when he stood and following him out the door
Asher nodded, and headed up the stairs. He really was tired. Today had been a long one, and he really wanted to just tumble into bed and sleep. Tomorrow, hopefully, would be less stressful, though he wouldn't count on it.
She sauntered after him, stretching out her limbs once more. She was stiff and sore from all of her stress. “I’m exhausted.”
"Me too." He admitted, going into the room. He didn't even bother to turn on the light before flopping onto the bed and crawling under the covers, laying on his back. He was laying on the right side of the bed, leaving the other half for her.
Arabella climbed in after him, giving him plenty of room to sit and stretch and sleep. She was worried about getting in his way or making him upset in any way. But when he didn’t complain, she just laid her head down and sighed softly.
"Good night." He said sleepily, closing his eyes tiredly. He stretched slightly, then lay still, hands folded across his chest.
(Want to timeskip to the morning?)
(Yeup!)
It tookArabella much longer than she would have hoped to fall asleep… her eyes slipped closed but her body felt restless.
The next morning she woke even more sore and in a cruddy mood. She sat up and glared at the clock, grumbling under her breath. Today was not going to be a good day.
Asher was already up before her, and was in the bathroom combing his hair and humming under his breath as he did so. He was already dressed, though his shirt was mostly unbottoned, as he hadn't yet buttoned it up.
She slid from the covers and padded over to the bathroom, knocking on the door. She threw her arms around herself and sighed sadly. What a day they had ahead… she would have to be close and Rather intimate with Asher during the dinner…
"You can come in!" Asher called, setting the comb aside and starting to button up the shirt, still humming softly.
Arabella opened the door and groaned at the light. She blinked blearily and shuffled past him to grab her hairbrush. “It’s too early…” she whined. “But I can’t sleep…”
He chuckled softly. "Good morning." He replied. "And if you're sleepy, uhm…I don't know." He finished buttoning the shirt up, looking over at her.
She growled a few profanities under her breath and began to sleepily brush her hair out, her eyes slipping closed. “Too early…” she murmured again, grumbling lowly.
