forum "As a person of the LGBTQA+ community, what stories do you wish you saw more of?": LGBTQA+/ SAGA advice and support forum.

Started April 18, 2018 by @Twitchy

tune

That's my goal, but I'm putting Della and Co. on my backburner so I can focus on my other story right now.

Hello, I just stumbled across this thread! I myself am ace, so it would be super cool to have representatives in more media. Other awesome things would be characters that have more traits than their just their orientations. For example, Leigh Bardugo's Six of Crows does awesome with this, the whole set up with the characters flows perfectly, it doesn't stop they story and say "hey, look this token character is gay." Her short story book Language of Thorns has some awesome original fairy tales that feature a few non-straight relationships, which is always a cool addition to see.

I just read Six of Crows and was going to comment on how it has great LGBTQA+ representation that isn't direct to character's personalities. That series is also a great way to connect with my non-LGBTQA+ friends. One of my friends actually introduced me to the series because of a ship in the series that is two boys.

xD Hello fellow Kat, its always fun to meet awesome people

@kat_i_am and @Katastrophic I am writing a book where I want one of the characters to be ace but I really don't want to offend anyone or portray the character incorrectly. Could you please explain what being ace is like and how I could write a character that is ace and make it seem believable?

Okay so I'm v depressed and angsty rn and struggling with being ace (because my college has this hyper dating culture which I HATE but you know that's a thing for another day) so I can't give you a v balanced personal experience rn
but in general
Aces have little to no sexual attraction- there are different types of aces!

• demisexual: only experience sexual attraction when they know someone well, and already have an emotional bond
• gray-ace/graysexual- experiences sexual attraction rarely
  these are just two!

Aces can experience aesthetic and sensual attraction. Aesthetic attraction is exactly what it sounds like. As I like to say… I'm ace not blind. Sensual attraction I'm still learning about, I just heard of it like a week ago. Then I think there's one more? But idk.
Aces have different feelings about sex! On one end of the spectrum you have sex-favorable aces, who enjoy/want to have sex, but on the other end, you have sex-repulsed aces (das me!!) who are disgusted by the idea of sex, and don't ever wanna have sex. In the middle is indifference, and it's really any ace's choice as to whether they have sex. Some will do it for their partner, because they love them a lot. So yeah. Not all aces are celibate.

That's all I can think of rn?
I'll come back if I think of more.
If you search the forums for how to write an ace character you'll get a few threads
or how to write an asexual character
one or the other

Thanks, this really helped!

Anytime!
Also sorry it took so long to respond- I'm closeted, and my roommate could've turned around and seen so I'm like…. Rather safe than sorry

I completely understand. I'm closeted too and it's a little risky having the pansexual flag as my profile picture but….oh well

ROMANTIC ATTRACTION
THAT'S THE THIRD THAT I FORGOT
I'M DUMB
who is your ace character attracted to?
For example, I'm biromantic, so I'm like…. Bisexual but minus the sexual part
Eg: homoromantic, heteroromantic, panromantic, etc

I completely understand. I'm closeted too and it's a little risky having the pansexual flag as my profile picture but….oh well

You're v brave

ROMANTIC ATTRACTION
THAT'S THE THIRD THAT I FORGOT
I'M DUMB
who is your ace character attracted to?
For example, I'm biromantic, so I'm like…. Bisexual but minus the sexual part
Eg: homoromantic, heteroromantic, panromantic, etc

She's attracted to boys, so I suppose she would be heteroromantic

I completely understand. I'm closeted too and it's a little risky having the pansexual flag as my profile picture but….oh well

You're v brave

Eh more like I would rather have someone just find out I'm pan than have to tell them myself

Yes everything that Kat said is pretty spot on. I myself don't experience sexual attraction or arousal, though I do enjoy physical contact such as hugs and cuddling (or other "romantic" interactions). My ideal partner is a best friend, which is always the goal of a partner I suppose. Depending on the ace, they may choose to have sex with their partner even if they don't necessarily enjoy it themselves. Another thing, though not really as important, is that some aces (like myself) just don't get celebrity attraction. Like other Kat said, some still know when a person looks good or they can still think someone is hot. Then there are people like me who look at those obligatory shirtless scenes and think "so what?" There's a lot of differences between every asexual person, but in general as long as the character isn't a token or "fixed" in the story, then it's awesome to have representation.

ooh yes to the physical contact for me too
I'm v into hugs and platonic cuddles and hand holding with ppl I know and love

Hi, biro-ace here. I agree with what Kat (both of them) said, and I'd like to add that just because a character is ace doesn't mean they're a sweet, 'Minnesota Nice' little angel who can do no wrong. That being said, they also aren't evil, soulless villains for not feeling sexual attraction. I feel like what ace rep I do see (not gonna lie, it isn't much) falls into those 2 catagories.

agreed, as a "FIGHT ME" type of person I can affirm that being ace doesn't really define personality, like any sexuality that stereotypes.

Kat are you sure we aren't the same person

Alright thanks everyone!

So, I need advice please. I'm struggling with what to do with one of my stories. I'm trying to decide if:
A. Geneva should be a lesbian and end up with Martha
B. Geneva should be bi and end up with Jackson
C. Geneva and Jackson should be aro but in a sexual relationship
D. Geneva, Jackson, and Martha should be in a poly relationship
E. Geneva should be aro-ace and just remain friends with them both.

I vote B or E

That's what I was thinking, thanks Kat!!!

Np babe ;)

Okay mood
Do it