Lucian was quiet for a moment, thinking and listening to the prince ramble. Abrose was right of course but he didn't want to admit it. There were some things that Lucian had picked up in his time in the palace but there were some things that would just never make sense to him, arranged marriages being one. While he understood the advantages of picking out a suitor for their children, he would never understand why parents wouldn't just want their children to be happy. Wasn't that all that mattered? Their child's happiness? And yet it was shown again and again that it wasn't important enough as royals and nobles forced their children into loveless marriages. If Lucian ever had children he would never treat them in such a way. They should be allowed to chose who they loved and wanted to marry. "I think you need to sit them down and have a real conversation with them. In the morning, as soon as possible so they can't scheme behind your back. I think you can convince them otherwise, Abrose. You should be allowed your own happiness too. Your happiness matters just as much as anyone else's."
Lucian looked away as the conversation was diverted to him. He didn't want to talk about his love life because there was nothing to talk about. Other than a simple fling here or there, Lucian had never settled down with anyone or been serious with anyone. He told himself and anyone that tried that he was putting his career first. It came first and maybe in another five or ten years, when his position was solidified and he had a proud ranking, he would settle down with someone nice and start a family. That was just the lie he told everyone and himself. But no matter how much he repeated it to himself, he could never convince himself of it.
The truth was, Lucian had been in love with Abrose for years. Ever since they were children, before Abrose had decided to transition. He had loved him as a girl and loved him still, maybe more, now that he was a boy. No one would ever compare to the little prince. No one. But he could never have Abrose. Lucian was a guard of low status and birth. And even if he rose through the rankings and became a general one day, he would never be worthy of a prince. So he just loved from afar, he always would. He wished for the best for Abrose and hoped his little prince could find happiness with someone who was worthy of him. Someone who wasn't Lucian. Like a prince. But a prince who actually respected Abrose and who he was. Not this forgeiner who was using Abrose in a political play.
"I'm married to my job, that is all, Abrose. There is no one else. I don't have time for it. I'm focusing on my career." Maybe if he said it one more time he would believe it. Nope, didn't work.
A half smile quirked on Abrose's lips even as he was still unconvinced that his parents would take time to listen about the marriage or the fact that he didn't get married. If he would struggle with telling his parents about marriage he didn't even want to begin to think what they would say if he suggested marrying outside royalty, wanting be with Lucian no less. My happiness would mean nothing without you beside me.
Abrose chuckled softly, whether out of relief or disappointment he didn't know. On one hand abrose was glad Lucian was focusing on his career. He was proud of his guard for doing all he could to achieve his long time dream. Perhaps it was a twinge of selfishness that abrose was glad no one else got to know Lucian so closely enough as to form such an intamate relationship. The disappointment came when he realized Lucian had no inate interest in anyone, including Abrose. His smile fell completely and he glanced away for a moment before realizing he hadn't replied. "Of course, I'm glad you're focusing on your dream. And you're so close too." He tried to brighten his mood as he straightened and lightly rested his hand on top Lucian's. "I only with you the best in life, my future captain." He managed a small smile before pulling back and slowly standing on his branch. "I think I'm going to turn in for the night. I'd rather not return with mother waiting by my door."
Lucian noticed the moment Abrose's mood dropped. He stiffened slightly, drawing in a sharp breath. He hand' meant to put a damper on things. He wasn't sure what it was he necessarily said that had upset the prince. He said he wasn't seeing anyone. He said he didn't have time for anything, that he was trying to focus on his career. That was all truth. And those were things Abrose should have already known. Perhaps it had been much to long since they had hung out casually. He didn't think they had at all since he had returned to the palace as a guard, his guard mostly. They had a professional relationship. That was it. It made Lucian sad, to realize it. He wished they had spoken more like this. And now they might not have time to again. Not if his parents made Abrose marry that awful prince. He supposed only time would tell.
He cleared his throat, nodding. He was slipped back into guard Lucian. Casual, fun Luce was gone. It was such a quick shift. From laid back and smiling to spine stiff and composed. "Of course. Not a fate any of us would want, I think." A dangerous thing to say, if Abrose took offense to such words. It could get him thrown in prison if Abrose really wanted him to be. But Lucian knew he wouldn't. Knew those words were only a slight tease before that last bit of Luce faded away and he was all Lucian. "I'll go first."
One branch at a time, he climbed down the tree. He kept an eyes on Abrose and another eye on their surroundings. He wasn't going to let anything slip past him and put the prince at risk. Once his feet touched the ground, he bent down to strap his sword back to his waist before standing to his full height. He watched, waiting for Abrose to descend.
Abrose breathed a laugh at the slight jest towards his mother though his smile didn't reach his eyes. It should have been a comment Abrose reprimanded Lucian for. Added a few hours to his patrol, made him cleaned the barracks, something for the slight against the queen. But Abrose just couldn't. In general he never really punished the guard when they slipped up or made a comment, save for the few times around his transition some were still confused but even then, they had only gotten a verbal warning which seemed to have worked. Around Lucian, all the teasing and jokes were just a part of their friendship. Something Abrose could always look forwards to after a long day. A reminder the even whil he was a guard, lucian was still some Abrose could loosen up around and joke or just talk with.
Abrose held the trunk for security as he took one more look at the kingdom before he slowly made his way down the tree. "Have you ever been to Prythia?" Abroae asked as he dusted off the dirt from his clothes, not wanting anyone, particularly his mother, to notice if she so happened to check in in the morning. "I've only read about it in my studies. I assume since we've been at war for so long the depictions of the kingdom isn't as accurate or catering to how it truely is." He mused, clasping his hands behind his back as he started to walk again back through the garden. He wasn't read to head back in quite yet but he knew he'd been gone for a while now. Questions would be raised if someone were to find him and Lucian gone from the castle and Abrose didn't want to get Lucian in trouble.
Lucian titled his head in slight confusion. That hadn't been the question he was expecting to hear. It was the master thing perhaps, that he had expected. His face turned into a small grimaced as he remembered his time there. It had been short and terrible. He had lost friends and experienced brutality unlike anything before. No one really spoke about the horrors of war. Just that the army was a brotherhood and you'd never forget it. It was never about the fallen soldiers or the horrific scenes yiu night witness.
"I saw some of it but it was a war zone, Abrose." He had forgone formalities, at least now while they were alone. "I didn't see much of civilization." He was unsure of why Abrose was asking. Perhaps the prince had accepted his engagement and simply wanted to know the country he would be living in. Lucian didn't think so. Lucian didn't think Abrose would ever go through with this marriage. So it was strange that he was asking. Abrose was likely up to something but it wasn't his place to comment or prevent. As long as Abrose was being safe and didn't get caught, Lucian wouldn't bat an eye if he poisoned the prince or set lose some frogs on him or something to disgust thus foreign prince. It would likely take all he had not to laugh.
Abrose nodded in understanding before he paused and crouched down by a bed of stark white flowers, small and ruffly but one of the few to have bloomed early. He reached out and lightly touched the flowers, their petals delicate and soft. "Then it speaks more of us than it does them. What reason do we have to continue fighting them if there is nothing else?" He couldn't understand why his parents wanted him to marry so suddenly. What would that solve? Amire seemed just as disenclined to marry as Abrose did considering hadn't even taken two seconds to learn his name. Besides even if the two did want to marry what would abrose do in a war torn country like Prythia. Chire was the crown prince, he knew politics and treaties. Even Lily was well versed in court formalities. Abrose was only begining, what good would he do against the war? He glanced over his shoulder, and tried to think of what Lucian had seen, not only in Prythia but in the years he had spent training away from Avrile. He reach for his hand and gently squeezed. "I can't even begin to imagine what you've seen and been through." He stood and resached up to place a flower he had picked into Lucian's hair. "If you ever need to talk, I'm here. I know I'm a prince but we've been friends far longer." Htiltwd his and grinned "what's that smile for hm, have I said something worth laughing at Callistar?" he challenged teasingly, glad that his dear friend was smiling again
Lucian didn't answer. He couldn't. He couldn't fathom why the two nations continued to fight. If it was a simple matter of human rights and fighting to protect them, he would understand. But this was simplely just war for wars sake. Perhaps it might have started out of a legitimate reason but now, now it was just to fight. And hundreds of thousands of people were dying in result. He had witnessed it first hand what it would do to someone.
"I don't wan you imagining," Lucian said quietly. It was not a thought anyone should be thinking, least of all Abrose. The prince was soft and kind and genuine. He should not be thinking of war or the horrors it brought. It would absolutely terrify him and break his heart.just the thought of his own friends dying had him stiffening and shutting down. He didn't want to think about it anymore. He wasn't there anymore, fighting for his life, his friends lives. He was here in the palace and in charge of the prince. That was his duty. That's what he was there for. He squeezed the hand Abrose offered him tightly, perhaps a little too hard. He hadn't meant to, he was just struggling in the moment. "And I will take you up on that." Lucian never would. He would never burden Abrose like that.
He just shook his head, a small smile returning to his lips. He bent his head down to allow the prince to place the flower in his hair. "Nothing, just thinking." Thinking about anything other than war and the horror he's faced. Thinking happy thoughts like Abrose gluing that prince's things down to everything so he couldn't use a single thing. "Let's get you inside now."
Abrose's brows creased, worry setting in as Lucian squeezed his hand. "I have to, if I'm going to help rule this and any other kingdom some day. War will be part of that. As much as I wish for immediate peace, that won't be possible without some progress." Abrose gently cupped Lucian's cheek with his other hand, as if he could take away the pain he saw in Lucian's eye eyes with just one touch. "These are my people, Luce. I want to know what happens to the people who have sworn their loyalties to me and my family. That includes the soldiers and guards. that includes the citizens. That includes you, my dearest Lucian."
On some naive level, Abrose thought himself immune to the horrors of the world. It had taken him years for him to realize the life he lived as a prince was a rare commodity. When he was younger, he hadn't understood why Lucian had to leave to become a soldier. It had felt like a betrayal. Then Chire and Lily started telling him about the war in Prythia and how not everything was as peaceful as it seemed. He had been worried, not only for Lucian but for the people sent to Prythia to fight, for the people of Prythia who just wanted to protect their own kingdom same as Avrile. When Lucian had come back, Abrose was unbelievably relieved, but also not completely blind to the situation as much as some wished he were.
"i'm serious. And if for whatever reason you can't tell me, there are always others you can talk to Luce. But please, don't think you need to keep to it all to yourself." he pleaded, braiding the flower in Lucian's hair loosely. "Thinking of what hm? Nothing good I assume with a mischievous smile like that." He idly toyed with Lucian's fiery red hair, half hugging him again and resting his head against his shoulder. "Okay, we've both had a long day. Theres a lot to think about too."
Lucian's eyes closed at the contact. Abrose was very touchy today and he found he quite liked it. Lucian wasn't touched often, not unless he was in a sparring ring fighting, but that was different than this. This was affection. The last time someone had been so kind to him like this would have been his mother from years ago. Years. How terrible tot think that the last person to touch him so kindly was his mother from years ago. Not even the person he had needed here and there had touched him so. His heart was beating so fast he thought it would jump out of his chest. "Perhaps one day I will tell you these things. You have had enough tonight, however. I won't worsen the night further with my stories." He would never take the prince up on that. He couldn't. He didn't want to see the sympathy or horror in his eyes when he told him. Lucian didn't want to be looked at any differently. He was still Lucian, just a little changed.
His eyes slowly opened, smiling softly as Abrose continued to play with his hair. Someone would surely say something when they saw the flower but Lucian would wear it with pride. The prince had given it to him and he would keep it until it wilted. "I'm just thinking of you being mischievous. An entertaining thought that would bring a smile to anyone's face." He looked down at the prince as he put his head on Lucian's shoulder. It felt so right, so calm. Almost like they fit right against each other. Lucian wanted to kiss him. He almost did, having already started to lean down. But then reality hit and Lucian was a guard and Abrose was a prince and his charge. This couldn't happen. It wasn't as if Abrose felt anything for him anyways. It would only be humiliating for Lucian when he was rejected.
Abrose's heart thundered in his chest at being so close to Lucian. He could feel the other's tickle his ear as they spoke in hushed voices. All Abrise wanted to do was curl up against his guard where he knew it was safe and warm and…he paused. He was going to say living but Abrose didn't know that for a fact. This could all be due to to Lucian's job. He was supposed to care for Abrose seeing that he was his personal guard. It had made sense to make Lucian Abrose guard because they were so close. That wouldn't necessarily mean this was out of any sort of love though. Abrose bit his lip in thought. Then how could this, their closeness, their comfort with each other, feel so right? He burried his face in Lucian's shoulder, not wanting think of a life where Lucian didn't care for him outside of their assigned duties.
"And what have I done that is so mischeivious?" He questioned, his voice muffled against Lucian's form. He didn't want to pull away but he knew sooner or later they'd both have to go back to being a prince and guard. He tipped his had back in time to see Lucian lean in close, his heart skipping a beat or two. He was tempted to lean in, to know the brush of Lucian's soft lips or to press further into his form. But then Lucian paused. Abrose flicked his gaze up to Lucian searching for the same shared desire. Perhaps Abrose saw something if he tried but Lician was ever the unreadable guard Abrose loved. He released a small sigh and tilted his head to the side to press a kiss to Lucian's cheek. "A thank you, for accompanying me out here." He said softly, offering a small smile before completely pulling away and tugging the scarf around his shoulders a bit more tightly, now feeling the chill in the air.
Lucian placed a gentle hand on Abrose's back as the small prince curled into him. He looked around, to make sure no one was watching them. The amount fo trouble Lcuian coukd get into was astronomical is anyone discovered this. He shouldn't be touching the prince. Lucian knew better and yet here he was, touching and holding and almost kissing the prince. Utter blasphemy. But he wouldn't want to be anywhere else in this moment. His eyes shut for a brief moment, just a second, to soak this in. He jad been in love with Abrose for a very long time. To touch him like this, to be touched by him, was so much better than he had ever imagined.
"Oh you know what you've done in the past. Don't play dumb." He shook his head, remembering the antics they had gotten up to as children. They didn't behave often. And because Lucian was with the prince, well, princess at the time, he had gotten away with it.
Lucian stared down at Abrose. He wanted and that was dangerous. He shouldn't want. Not him. Not Abrose. And yet he did. It was wrong. It was so wrong and yet it felt so right. He cleared his throat and raised his head, surveying around them. He needed to clear these thoughts from his head. Maybe guarding the prince was a bad idea. A very bad idea. It was resurfacing thoughts he had repressed for years. All to come back up in this moment. "You don't have to thank me, Abrose." He murmured. "You never do." I would do anything for you.
He stepped back from him and began to guide him back in the palace.
He laughed and shook his head "that is where you are wrong, my dearest Lucian. I have a great many things to thank you for." He followed Lucian back towards the castle, taking one last look at the few flowers and empty beds before the cold got too much for him and he hurried through the greenhouse doors.
"Perhaps I was wrong about Amire." He mused aloud, thinking back to earlier and of the prince, anything to keep his mimd of their shared moment. "After all, he comes from a war torn country only trying to do what he believes can save it. Maybe a marriage isn't in order but some sort of agreement. It's clear neither our parent are willing to speak so maybe it's up to us." They reached the hallway that had the three sibling's bedroom chambers and Abeose began to slow, not quite wanting to leave Lucian just yet despite his exhaustion. He rested his hand on the handle to his room but didn't go in yet, still thinking things over, Amire, the two kingdoms, how Abeose could possibly help, him and Lucian…if there even was something between them at all. "Would you come with me tomorrow if I do decide to meet with Amire? I know it's royal business but I'd still want you there if you're okay with it. I know the war must have been difficult to say the least. If you'd rather not, I'd understand." He offered, looking over his shoulder at his guard, in that moment willing to do just about anything to be back in his arms, rules be damned.
Lucian was quiet but there was a small smile on his lips. The prince had nothing to thank Lucian for. He had only done what the right thing was to do. But he was haply nonetheless that his actions were appreciated. He stiffened, smile dropping, as Abrose brought up the other prince. He understood the words he was saying but it didn't sit right with hom, Abrose talking about and to the other prince. The prince that had proposed. The prince that his parents were trying to force him to marry. A prince who didn't even get Abrose's name right. It wasn't a hard thing. It was two syllables. Ab-rose. Easy. Except the prince had gotten it all wrong.
Perhaps Abrose was right. Perhaps the two prince's could speak with their parents and manage to make peace with their parents. Perhaps there was a way to solve this without marriage. But with if it couldn't. What if the parents couldn't see that and forced the two to marry anyways? Prince Amire had been expecting a princess. But there was no princess, only a wonderful prince. How would Amire handle that? How would he treat him? Lucian grew more worried by the second as all the possibilities ran through his head.
Then a voice pulled him out of it. Abrose. Yes. They had been speaking and walking and now they were at the prince's door. He was asking him something, asking Lucian to come with him. Lucian would follow him anywhere he asked. "Of course. I'll go anywhere you need me to."
Abrose smiled and nodded his head, "See? I do have reasons to thank you, Luce." He hid a yawn behind his hand and checked the clock on the other side of the hall. "Its getting late. The ball should be concluding soon. I'll send Amire a note saying we'll want to meet with him privately tomorrow afternoon. By then mother and father should be busy enough not to disturb us." He didn't necessary like the idea of going behind his parents back, especially for something as important as this but he didn't really have another choice. After all, they hadn't consulted him on the marriage beforehand. if they wanted him to do something about the war, then they'd have settle for this. Besides, it wasn't like they were sneaking around doing anything wrong. He was honestly more afraid of him and Lucian being caught alone than him and Amire. He wasn't sure how obvious he and Lucian were but he knew his mother at least knew his preference to Lucian over other guards, hence why she had occasionally assigned him more than one guard. Abrose didn't particularly mind, he had been meaning to acquaintance himself more with the rest of guards, finding their company more enjoyable than most of the lord and ladies he had to pretend to be sociable around. So long as Lucian would remained by his side, Abrose wouldn't object.
e watched Lucian for a few moments, slight worry prickling at the back of his mind. Tonight had been different. He and Lucian were close of course, they had all practically grown up together. Chire had trained alongside Lucian when they were younger and dreaming of being soldiers. Lilly had always dragged him and Abrose to the woods to play and explore whenever they had free time. Lucian had been there when Abrose had confessed he felt more like a boy than a girl and had begun his transition. The only time Luce hadn't been a part of Abrose's life as when he left to be a soldier for the kingdom. Those had been some of the hardest years for Abrose but he had made it through, less enthusiastically but he was here now so he supposed it was all worth it, especially if Lucian was here with him now. But that still didn't explain what had happened moments earlier. Abrose was positive he hadn't drank so much to the point of complete inebriation.
The way how close Lucian was had felt so right. Being held by him felt like the most natural thing in the world, as if they were made to embrace. Their teasing remarks and soft words were something Abrose could easily picture them sharing every morning, evening, and night. At that, Abrose mind wandered from sharing words to sharing a bed, sharing soft touches and kisses, sharing a morning all meant for themselves with no expectations of a prince or a guard. A quiet peaceful life where Abrose could want, better, could have Lucian selfishly to himself. He flushed and rested his head for a moment against the door, letting himself have a few moments to revel in the beautiful dream before he tried his best to compose himself. He turned back to Lucian and gave a slight bow. "Forgive me, I've kept you far too long. Thank you again, Luce. I'll send for you in the morning. Until then, rest my guard. we've had a long day and i only suspect tomorrow will be longer." He offered a small smile before opening the door to his bedroom and softly clicking the door closed behind him.
Lucian pursed his lips. Abrose was set on speaking with Prince Amire and he wouldn't stop him. He didn't like it but he wouldn't stop Abrose. It wasn't like Lucian coukd. Once that prince set his mind to something, there was no changing it unless the prince cam to the conclusion not to do it. It was something he admired and loved about Abrose. That stubbornness. He loved it. He loved him. The thought made his heart ache. He was only making this worse for himself and yet he couldn't help but let his mind wonder. Wonder what it would bemike if they coukd be together. Where Abrose wasn't a prince and Lucian wasn't a guard. Somewhere they could just be who they were. Somewhere they coukd be haply and love one another, free of repercussions. But this was the life he was given and he would do everything he coukd with what he had to work with. And that meant living Abrose from afar. He had survive for this long, he could do it longer still. He had to. Until Abrose was married and left home, Lucian would guard over hik and give his life, all while Aborse had stolen his heart. Lucian didn't think he would ever get back. It was no matter. His heart was for Abrose and Barose only. That was okay.
Lucian's gaze turned concerned as the prince's cheeks flushed and he leaned against the door. Had the prince come down with something? Perhaps going outside had t been the smartest thing. Allergies coukd have gotten to him. Or maybe someone at the ball had passes something in to him. He was just about to suggest taking Abrose to the infirmary to have him checked out when the prince spoke again.
Lucian bowed his head. "Anything for you, my prince," he murmured the words. They were barely audible but they still reached the prince's ears. Lucian cleared his throat. "I will see you in the morning, your Highness, sleep well." He waited until the door was shut before turning on his heel and walking back down the hall.
Abrose breathed a small laugh as he listened Lucian's footsteps retreat. "Anything, you say?" He shook his head, his mind still filled with the fantastic little fantasy of a life he knew there was little to no chance of happening. It was often Abrose fell asleep to these little fantasies, better than stalling on the fact that he'd have to marry someone other than Lucian one day. Abrose changed from his fancy party clothes into a well-loved soft shirt and silky pj pants. Before he succumb to sleep, Abrose settled at his desk and started to write out a short note. He figured a note would be easier to send than asking Amire in person the next morning during breakfast. Once he signed off the note and gingerly folded it into an envelope, Abrose stamped it with his personal wax seal and kept it safe in a drawer to have it delivered early in the morning. He went around his room, making sure to extinguish each candle and lantern until all were out. He buried himself under all the blankets and pillows piled on his bed, fully intent on reading a few pages in the book he had grabbed from his shelf but the moment his head met the pillow, he let himself relax and almost immediately fell asleep.
Abrose awoke in the morning, unfortunately, to Chire poking him relentlessly. He lightly smacked his brother with the book he had taken to bed and groaned in protest. "five more minutes." Abrose groaned, tugging the heavy covers over his head. Chire chuckled softly "I already gave you ten. we're waiting on you." Abrose huffed softly and sat up, giving his brother another playful wack with the book before he shuffled around his room, putting on a pair of slippers and slipping on a robe. He found the envelope in the drawer and put in his pocket before following his brother.
Lucian rejoined the commotion of the ball, helping direct guests to their rooms or carriages. He could have opted to leave. He could have gone back ti the barracks for bed but he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep. He had a certain prince on his mind and that was going to keep him up. So if he was already going to be awake, why not get to work? The minutes dragged on and finally, hours later, everyone was where they needed to bed and Lucian was dragging his feet to bed. He checked kn the food and water bowl for his not so much his cat. The food was empty and the water was low. He filled them both up before trudging to bed. His cat had likely found somewhere to sleep for the night when he didn't show up at his usual time. No matter.
Lucian was barely able to undress before he was falling into bed in a fitful dream. His father was there and so was Abrose and it was all very confusing and he remember almost none of it when he shot out of bed. He looked out his window. Still dark. He had a couple more hours to get some sleep. He laid back down but sleep didn't find him. At some point as he lay there staring at the ceiling, there was a meow outside his window. He got uo to let Bean inside and when they were curled up together, that was when he could find sleep once more.
Lucian woke at first light as he did every morning. He had only gotten a few hours of sleep but that was the life of a palace guard. To much work, very little sleep. Maybe one day he would have the luxury of sleeping in. Even on his few days off he got a month, he was still up at the crack of dawn. Call it a habit. He let Bean out of his window before dressing in his training clothes. He always trained first thing in the morning.
He met his fellow guards in the training yard and at precisely six a.m. they begun. They started with a warmup run and then on onto stretches. They had some exercises and obstacles to complete before they were sparring against one another. No weapons, fists only. Lucian like this because he always won. He was smart and knew how to use his opponent. It's why he won every single damn time. It was likely another reason he was so often put on duty of the prince. He could protect him.
The hour passed and finally training came to an end. He washed himself before dressing in his little barrack before he was back on duty and standing in the dining hall watching the royals eat their breakfast.
Abrose hid a large yawn behind his hand as he entered the dining room. Acutely aware of the few extra pair of eyes in the room, he tucked his robe a bit tighter over his slightly revealing shirt. He flicked his gaze around the table as he and Chire settled in their respective seats. His mother was to the right of his father who sat at the head of the table, his sister across from their mother, Chire was supposed to be beside Lilly but that spot was currently filled by Amire, which happened to put him directly in front of Abrose, who sat beside his mother. Chire moved to sit beside Abrose.
He took the opportunity to quickly look around the room as the food was brought out, seeking out Lucian just for a sense of reassurance before he stood and took out the letter he had put in his pocket. Abrose glanced up as if sheepish to his mother who watched in surprise and what he could describe intrigue. Perfect. The more she thought he was giving into the marriage, the easier it would be able to speak with Amire without her ease-dropping. She wouldn't want to risk messing up the potential for the marriage after all. He offered a shy smile and rounded the table to give Amire the note, the one he took with slight confusion but accepted regardless. When Abrose went back to sit, both his siblings met his gaze with mildly shocked expressions. They both knew Abrose's feeling towards Lucian so for him to seeming switch his affections towards Amire, especially after his actions the night before, were surprising. Abrose so badly wanted to reassure them both his heart still solely belonged to Lucian but until he could speak with them in private without his mother or father around, he would keep quiet.
"I would like to apologies, your highness." Amire piped up after a few moments of awkward silence other than the soft clinking of utensils. Abrose peaked up, expecting Amire to be facing his parents but instead, his eyes were pinned on Abrose. He straightened slightly and tipped his head. "Whatever for?" He asked politely, though not ignorantly. Abrose could think of a few things Amire could apologies for but he kept his mouth smartly shut.
"For yesterday. I was not informed you went by another name nor no longer was a princess. I would like to apologies for my ignorance and to correct myself, Prince Abrose." He said, offering a small smile.
Abrose blinked a few times before nodding slowly and toying with the food on his plate. "You are forgiven. Thank you, your Highness."
Lucian stood against the wall of the dining, standing at perfect attention, just like hos other fellow guards. Had he not been breathing he could have been a statue. It's what he had been trained to do. He was invisible. He needed to be invisible unless the time came that he was needed. Unless someone jumped through a window and tried to stab the king or such, he would remain motionless against the wall, facing the windows and dining room.
Out of the corner of his eyes, he was watching Abrose. He was watching the exchange between him and that other prince. He didn't like it. Not one bit. He told himself it was because he didn't trust Amire's intentions but deep down he knew it was because if jealousy. He was jealous. He wanted the prince's attentions, not Amire. Lucian, who had been quietly loving Abrose all these years. Lucian, who had been there and supported him when he decided he was no long Rose but Abrose. Lucian had always been there, even when he physically wasn't. These were terrible, treasonous thoughts he was having. But he couldn't help it. His heart had chosen and there was no going back.
As Abrose made contact with him, Lucian offered a small smile. Barely. It was just a twitch of the lips really. Anything else and he would have been caught. But it was slight and it was there and he only hoped that Abrose had seen it. Despite the prince's actions, he would be there to support hik no matter what. If Abrose changed his mind and decided to marry the prince, Lucian would support him even though his heart would be breaking.
For the rest of the breakfast, Abrose and the rest of his family fell into light conversation, occasionally asking Amire questions about his kingdom though they were cautious to keep the questions generalized, so as to not put him in an uncomfortable position. After all, he was still the prince of an enemy kingdom. At one point or another, the topic of his own siblings came up and all three Nightingale siblings began recounting their various adventures and shenanigans, something Amire could easily relate to with his own family members.
"You mention this Lucian quite a bit. Are they also a sibling of yours?" Abrose snapped his head up, his surprise reflected in his sibling's faces. "No," Abrose replied softly, if not a bit shyly. He hadn't realized just how much Lucian was a part of their conversations, more than that, their lives. "but he's just as important to us than our own blood." Amire nodded and arched an eyebrow when he caught Abrose looking for his guard again. "I see, perhaps I'll get to meet this special Lucian of yours." Abrose nearly choked on his drink and nodded, ignoring the slightly disapproving look his mother gave him. "Perhaps, yes. I'm sure you will."
Lucian was straining his ears to hear the conversation between Abrose and Amire. It was hard to hear over the chatter of all of the guests but he was able to catch bits and pieces. Enough to know that Abrose was constantly bringing him up. If he wasn't on duty he would have been blushing. It took every ounce of his self-control to keep his emotions in check. He saw Laurent across the room give him a wink. Obviously, Lucian wasn't the only one listening to this conversation. That might have made things even worse. He could already hear the teasing voices of his friends later on when they were off duty or out of earshot. Their teasing about the prince having a little crush on him without any idea that Lucian actually liked the prince back. That the prince loved him. No one knew. Well, maybe his mother did but he had never directly told her. That she had figured out on her own.
His heart ached at the silent reminder that it would never be him sitting at that table. It would never be him sitting next to the prince. He would always be standing guard, silent in the background. He was invisible, he had to be. That was his role to play here. Keep quiet and guard the royal family with his life. That's what he had to do. Even if it hurt, even if it broke his heart, that's what he would do. He would love Abrose from afar. That was the life he was given. That was the role he would have to play. He knew it, accepted it. His life would be full of heartbreak and sorrow but he wouldn't have it any other way. He couldn't imagine a life without loving Abrose.
The siblings fell into easy conversation with Amire, as if they've known each other for years. It was nice, getting to know the foreign prince and Abrise hoped he felt comfortable but there was still the nagging feelings surounding the erranged marriage. While he hoped to become friends with Amire through their first meeting later today, Abrose still had not intention on accepting the proposal, no matter how much his mother smiled approvingly or tried to support her case on how similar to the two were, how happy they could make each other. Thankfully, Amire seemed just as uninterested in the marriage as Abrose did, smiling politely at the queen's attempts to push them together. It didn't seem he was in any rush to marry much to Abrise's relief. And on Abrose's part, he wasn't ready to throw away years worth of love for Lucian just for a prince he had met yesterday.
After a lull in conversation, Abrose stood and excused himself to change into something more suitable than his night clothes. He Bowes politely to his family and Amire and strode back to his room, nodding slightly to Lucian, a small gesture that meant this afternoon would happen. They'd talk with Amire, hopefully convincing to call off the marriage. Then…well Abrise didn't know but he hoped he'd be able to confess to Lucian, as silly and futile that may be considering their differing status. But Abrose couldn't care less.
Lucian kept his composure as the meal went on. It was luck that nothing happened that needed his quick reflexes. He was so lost in his head that he probably wouldn't have been able to recognize anything. A body would have had to collapse in front of him for him to react and even then, he might not have. He couldn't stop thinking about Abrose. The prince was taking over his head. He had this under control. He did. He had been so good with keeping things professional between the two of them, but last night shattered everything. He couldn't stop thinking about his love for Abrose. He remembered all the times they played as children. All the sweet words between the two of them.
Lucian had written letters when he was gone. He had written letters so many times, signed and ready to mail, to send tot he prince. But he had stopped himself every time. It wasn't proper. Lucian was a common man, a military man. He shouldn't be in correspondence with a prince. It wasn't proper. It would have been likely that the letter would have never reached the prince anyways. So he had burned them all, hoping to burn away his infatuation.
As the prince excused himself, Lucian moved to follow. He technically hadn't been reassigned yet and thus he would follow the prince. With the extra people in the palace, it was best to keep a guard with each member of the royal family at all times. Someone had taken the night shift which had allowed him to retire for the night. But now he was back on duty, another long shift to go. It was only after they were out of earshot and sight of everyone that he spoke in a low voice, "It went alright I assume. How do you like the prince?"
Abrose physically relaxed once they were out of the dining room and away from his mother's watchful eyes. He slowed his pace to match Lucian's as they walked back to his room. He gave a slight shrug, "I suppose as well as we can hope for having the prince of an enemy kingdom in our own home." Ambrose replied, sighing softly and tugging the robe he had put on around himself a bit tighter to combat the chill of the morning. "I like him well enough. He seems nice. We can relate in many ways, having siblings, being at wat against each other. I guess on a more personal level, being stuck in an arranged marriage. He's someone I'd like to become closer to as friends. Marriage seems like an idea too far away to consider with him if it even is a future I wish to consider at all." He looked up at Lucian. "And you? What do you honestly think of the prince? Forgetting formalities for a moment, what are your thoughts on Amire?" He asked curiously as they reached his bedroom door. What Abrose really wanted was a reason not to go through with the marriage. His refusal and hidden feelings for another would only hold him over for so long until he'd hand have to admit the truth. That he couldn't marry Amire because he was already in love with another. Not that that would be a valid enough reason to back out but he'd have to admit it to everyone at one point or another. Abrise just hoped it wouldn't put Lucian's position or Lucian himself in danger.
Lucian listened to him speak as he walked beside him, nodding slowly. He kept one ear open, listening for anyone that might be coming their way. He couldn't get caught speaking tot he prince. They weren't supposed to talk to the royal family or anyone for that matter unless it was an emergency. They were supposed to stand there silently, follow silently, and only act if there was an attack or any other situation that might require them to act or talk. He thought for a moment. What did he think of Amire? Well, he knew his parents were trying to marry him off to the man Lucian loved. He didn't like that very much. He knew the prince had apologized for calling Abrose the wrong name. That was about it. He had heard bits and pieces of their conversation but he hadn't been able to catch most of it. He didn't know enough to form an opinion.
He shrugged his shoulders. A very unguardly movement. "I don't have much of an opinion. I haven't talked to him. I don't know a lot about him. But I do know you and I trust your judgment. If you think he is a good person then I believe you. I think you two will be able to come to some sort of arrangement." However, none of it would matter if their parents still made them go through with the marriage. A concern he decided to voice. "What will happen if your parents don't see reason? What will you do if they make you go through with this?"
