(happy 500 messages! :D)
“You have my word, Rin. I will not do such a thing,” Arquis murmured in response to the trigger. He did not ask any further questions; Rin did not seem as if he wanted to talk about it, and he would not force them to do so.
“As for myself, I am quite fine with anything.” His false smile dropped after just a second, and he looked away, embarrassed. “Well. I suppose that is not exactly true. My hands, I… I would ask that you not take the gloves off again. I do not blame you for the first time, but… I do not like to look at…” He realized he was clutching a shirt so hard that it was actually about to rip. His grip relaxed.
“Anyways. What about, ah, public displays? I still feel that we should not go too far.”
(:D)
"I won't." Rin said softly. "I only did it because it was necessary to save your life; otherwise I would never have overstepped your boundaries like that, Arquis." he looked at Arquis quietly, trying to convey their sincerity. "As for public displays, hand-holding is…well, essentially a requirement. Anything beyond that is…optional but recommended? Cheek kisses would likely help to uphold the image, but if that would make you uncomfortable, then we will not."
“Hand-holding is alright.” He hoped he didn’t look as flushed as he felt, but he imagined he was outrageously pink. “I am not sure about the, ah, other thing. It is not that I am uncomfortable with it, exactly, but that I have not done it before.”
To admit that he hadn’t ever kissed anyone, even on the cheek, at age twenty-one was extremely embarrassing. He had had a girlfriend before the death of his father, but she had been uncomfortable with physical displays of affection. The furthest they had ever gotten was hugging and occasionally sitting next to one another. He wasn’t surprised to find that he didn’t miss her much. She had never been a very good fit, as she had spent a lot of time bickering with Quirisa.
Frustration flared up within him. He felt pathetic for wanting the contact, for craving even a simple kiss on the cheek. He supposed that was his own fault. Turning down possible suitors and maintaining one’s distance didn’t exactly result in a lot of contact. That was why he was so starved for it.
His mind drifted to the previous night in bed with Rin, and he had to fight back the memory. That had not been on purpose. That meant nothing about how they viewed him, nor what he was comfortable with.
Rin nodded slightly. "I understand." he said softly. "We do not have to do those, then. I would not want to take the first from you." they knew that first kisses of any sort were seen as special, much of the time. His own had been with Lysander; all his firsts had, and he didn't look back on them with any sort of love or favor. But they knew that for Arquis, those might still be something special that he wanted to save for someone that mattered.
His next words flooded out in an uncertain rush. “No, no, we could. If you think that it would help—if it would make it more authentic—then we could. I do not mind. Unless you do, of course.”
He fiddled with the clasp of one of the suitcases after he was finished with filling it. The sides of it bulged out slightly from the amount of stuff it held. He was bringing enough clothes to last seven days; he would wash them or buy more if he had to, but any more than that would be too much to carry. There was also an extra coat, plenty of socks and necessary garments, several pairs of gloves, a pack of hygienic supplies, and a case of medicines. Someone, most likely Marsiquia, had also put in his nebulizer and a few scarfs to wear over his face. He was almost as glad for that as he was the money that was divided up between the suitcases, which would be extremely important to their journey.
They cleared their throat softly. "It is only that first kisses are generally seen as something special, and I would not want to…to take that occasion from you." he said, looking at Arquis quietly. "If you wanted to save it for someone you actually cared about in that way, then I would not be angry with you. I personally don't mind one way or the other."
He smiled at them, his expression glowing with appreciation. “Well, I am a little past the age in which first kisses are idolized,” he joked gently, “but I do thank you for your thoughtfulness. I only hesitated beforehand because I was not sure if my lack of experience would bother you. I would not want to make you feel uncomfortable with the situation in any way.”
Something soft and genuine flickered through his eyes, and his smile widened. “You would not be taking anything from me, Rin. I promise.”
Rin shook their head. "Experience or lack thereof does not bother me." they smiled softly in return, looking over at Arquis. "As I said, the situation does not bother me. Only the thing I mentioned earlier, really."
“If we are both alright with it, then I suppose we could try it out,” he replied. He had the sudden urge to do it right then and there, just lean forward and press a kiss to their forehead or cheek, but resisted. It was for public display, after all. They were not actually personally involved with one another.
He broke his eye contact with him and gently tucked the suitcases away under his bed, just out of sight. It would look suspicious if anyone saw him packing. Though, he did doubt that anybody would come in, even Muria. She only visited when she felt she had to, and she was smart enough to know that she couldn’t risk harming him in the next few days without drawing suspicion from the public.
When he straightened up, he asked, “The plan seems to be mostly settled. It has been quite the day already. Is there anything that you desire or wish to do while we wait for nightfall? We have plenty of time before then.”
He stretched a little bit, running his hands through their hair again. "It is settled, yes." they said, checking the time. "I…had been planning to bathe, but your sister did not give me that time." he left out a quiet laugh. "So that would probably be an ideal thing to happen, at some point, before we leave."
“You can use my bath now, if you would like,” he offered. “The Palace has been gifted a lot of handmade soap over the years from local shops hoping for an endorsement. I have not opened most of them, so you would have a lot of options to choose from. There is a rose and vanilla bar, a pumpkin cinnamon body wash, some honey and butterscotch soaps, two or three floral body scrubs, something called bath oil, bath salts, and about a million other products that I have not touched.”
The thought of all the soaps amused him. He couldn’t for the life of him figure out where to put all of his excess conditioners and lotions. He’d even collected several boxes of perfumes and colognes. Most of the time, he tried to distribute them in guest bathrooms so that they wouldn’t go to waste, but there were only so many guests a year.
He got up from the bed, nodding slightly. "Are you sure about that?" they questioned, raising their eyebrows at the nobleman with a bit of uncertainty. "I would not want to intrude on your space." even though he already had been for the past 24 hours, he didn't want to intrude any more than was necessary.
“Of course not, please go on ahead. I am not using it,” Arquis responded, gesturing with a hand to the bathroom door. There were still curls of steam coming out from when he had had the water running. That meant that there should be hot water rather quickly after it was turned on again; Rinlos would not have to wait long for it to fill up, even though it was cold out.
He had the fleeting thought that they would have to undress in order to bathe, but he shoved it down immediately. It was highly inappropriate to think of him in such a way. Disrespectful, even.
“I will stay out here and do some reading to pass the time,” he said, grabbing for the first book in sight. It was the book of love poems again, the one that Rin had read the other day. He resisted the urge to swear.
Rin smiled softly, heading towards the bathroom. "My thanks, Arquis." he replied softly. "There are clean towels in there that I can use, yes?" they paused at the doorway, looking back at the noble with raised eyebrows. He didn't want to get out of the bath, only to find he had nothing to dry themself off with.
“Yes, there should be plenty. Let me know if you have more questions or need anything else.”
Arquis flipped open to a random page in the poetry book and was disappointed to find an abstract poem about love and music. He moved forward a couple pages to one that he had marked: a poem about a romantic in moonlight. There was a sweetness to the words that always made him sentimental, and he thought the rhymes scheme was lovely. He thumbed the side of the page with a soft sigh, pleased but admittedly a little bored. Listening to Rinlos had spoiled him, apparently; he didn’t enjoy reading nearly as much when it was his own voice in his head saying the words. He lacked their musicality.
Rin closed the door to the bathroom and started the hot water, humming very quietly to himself as he stripped out of his clothes, setting them aside. They grabbed a bar of soap and some shampoo for their hair, setting them where they would be able to reach once they were in their bath.
Arquis tossed the book to the side and cast a glance around his room. That boredom had overwhelmed him, and he was now desperate for something else to do. He considered taking another book from his shelves but decided against it. What he needed was something less imaginative, more hands on. He needed to paint.
But there was nothing to paint, not in the closed space. The view from the balcony was alright, but he knew he shouldn’t go out. For starters, he had to be around in case someone entered. He also knew that he shouldn’t go out in his condition without at least a scarf and coat.
The balcony was not an option, then, but there wasn’t much else to consider. He tapped his hand uselessly on his knee. The sensation soothed him. Boredom was much nicer than panic, especially after the hectic morning he’d had.
He eventually slipped into the bath, and remained in the hot water for a while, scrubbing himself off and washing their hair, using the soap and the shampoo. Once he was finished, he pulled the plug so the water could drain, and wrapped the towel around their body, scrubbing over their skin to dry off.
At some point during his contemplation, Arquis began to doze off. His breathing slowed gradually. The first time he closed his eyes, he assured himself that it was just for a little bit. Technically, he wasn’t wrong. He blinked until he awoke again, though his consciousness didn’t last long. Soon enough, he was curled in on himself, his cheek pressed against his pillow. He only woke back up when he heard the drain of the bath. It took him some time to remember where he was and what he was doing, but eventually he straightened himself up and wiped the sleep from his vision.
“Is everything alright?” he called in a slightly slurred tone, wondering how much time he had missed. It felt like it had only been a few seconds. His head felt muzzy from the brief nap.
Rin looked around the bathroom and realized that they had quite forgotten to grab a fresh set of clothing. He didn't want to put dirty clothes back on. They cleared their throat, wrapping the towel around their waist. "Everything is fine! Only…I wonder if you would be kind enough to place my bag at the door? I forgot to bring a clean set of clothes in with me." they called back, running a hand through his damp hair.
Arquis blinked tiredly. It took him a second to process their words, and when he did, he called back, “Of course, please give me a moment.”
He scooped up his bag and did exactly as they asked, shuffling over to the door and placing it on the floor outside. It made a quiet noise as it touched the ground. Tiny clouds of steam from the bathroom seeped out and curled around it.
“It is right outside,” he said, his voice a little louder than usual to avoid being muffled by the door. He then realized what their lack of clothes would indicate, blushed, and added, “I am going to close my eyes. Tell me when I can open them.”
Rin laughed a little. "I have a towel around my waist, it's nothing scandalous." he replied, opening the door and grabbing the bag, then closing it again. "You can open them again, though, if you like. I have my bag." they set it on the counter, digging through it to find their clothes. It did not take them long to locate underthings, a shirt, and a pair of pants, pulling them on, then finding his comb and dragging it through his hair to get out all the knots.
Arquis only opened his eyes once he heard the door shut. “I would argue that it is somewhat scandalous,” he returned, bemused, “seeing as you would have been half unclothed. We might be faux married, but that does not mean I can see you in such a state.”
Goodness, what a mental picture that was, though. He pinched himself on his wrist for thinking of it and went to his wardrobe, where he fetched a pair of slacks, a long sleeved shirt, and a vest.
“Stay in there for a bit longer, please. I am going to change as well.”
He switched into his new outfit as quickly as possible, shedding his bathrobe and nudging it to the side. He kept the gloves from earlier on; they were clean enough, and he really was not in the mood to see his hands again.
"Ah…" Rin trailed off, cocking their head faintly, then shrugged. "I suppose you have a sharper sense of propriety than I do; I had a towel on, not like you would have seen my– ah, anything below the waist, which would have been good enough for me." they put away the comb, waiting for Arquis to tell them that they could come out of the bathroom. It was slightly amusing to them, that Arquis was more worried about seeing Rin half unclothed than Rin was.
“Well, people are not always comfortable with their bodies,” Arquis replied, his voice a little softer than before. “It was not just a matter of manners. I did not wish to make you feel vulnerable or ill at ease.”
He was glad they could not see his face, not at that moment. His words, he was certain, were steady enough, but his face would have revealed too much. He knew what it was like to be at odds with his body. And he also knew that it wasn’t always easy to expose it to others.
He finished adjusting his tie, pushed away from the wall he’d been standing against, and walked to his bed. “You can come out now, if you are finished.”
