forum Virtual Creative Writing Club, anyone?
Started by @ninja_violinist
tune

people_alt 130 followers

@ninja_violinist

(hey just a quick note: I'm not actually dead, just moved countries again, so I will. get to this soon. but in the meantime y'all should know that these are fabulous and you are writing legends)

@ElderGod-kirky group

SO
be prepared for multiple things like this
i'm doing a series of global mythology assignments that involve writing a diary entry in the pov of a character. i have picked probably my most apathetic but chaotic ancient character (~20,000 yrs) to write for, and this is the first entry 'she' has written

hopefully you can see it? i'm working in word and just uploaded the file to my google drive, so if there's issues, someone lemme know

@croccin-champagne

i very much recommend you do if you get the chance, or feel up to it! things like this are a great way to improve your own writing/art, and to get out there! there's also a huge sense of accomplishment in seeing your own work on the pages of an actual magazine, which is one heck of a boost

@ninja_violinist

…. I'm back?
sorry for being MIA for so long! I moved countries and then we slid right back into a local lockdown, which you would think would give me more time to be online? but ¯_(ツ)_/¯ here we are I guess

all that being said, I'd also encourage submitting writing if you can work up the courage! it's a great opportunity to challenge yourself and for others to engage with your work. And not to be That Person but being able to point to a publication and say "look what I did!!" can be a source of external validation if you're trying to justify decisions to yourself/parents/anyone really. At least it makes you feel ~professional~

as for what y'all posted while I was gone - I stand by what I said earlier. y'all are writing legends and I felt personally attacked when I reached the end and realised I don't get to find out what happens next
I still don't have much time/energy for intricate feedback, unfortunately, so please accept my humble semi-incoherent notes as tribute to your greatness (fun fact: most feedback starts out like this, I just usually go through it again and make it functional):

nicky shows up
A+ setting up the scene, figuring out which lil details to focus on to make it vivid.
odd wording "shadows would be in full force"?
Ahh this legend! great characterisation, good intro to Caroline. my foolish history heart cries authorship and context but that's not the point
odd wording sentence "Catori, to whom this…"?
If this is Catori limited pov (is it? not entirely sure tbh) then odd choice to mention her eye colour since she doesn't see herself?
…. but what does GFA stand for
odd wording "the colours stuck to"?
Caroline does not mess around eh
"none of us even know" maybe neither instead of none?

lmao ig yeah it's tragic
second sentence a bit long, possible loss of focus?
"covered up" is he wearing contacts?
so she says she "gets where she's coming from" but then three paragraphs later it's "I don't get why hockey is such a big thing for her"?
her attitude to this is so… matter of fact. like hey wow doesn't my life kinda such eh? very nice characterisation there

crocs do be inspiring me
this is peak nitpick but it sounds like he's describing a political entity in which case it's the UK not Britain. silly distinction, no one cares really, but eh
:( his struggles make me real sad ok
some American slang/phrases? could be a deliberate character voice thing ig
is it called a "spout" of curiosity? or "bout"?
"hurting enough" ok did you have to come for my heart like this
"cracked" prince? interesting choice. my heart. long sentence here, danger loss of focus?

Kora Diary
it's been a few sentences and I'm already living for the chaotic apathy
form journal entry! careful: all I'm reading is through filter of character deliberately writing it out
"of the, what was it? oh, yes, the Kehara" - interesting choice that she would write that process down? seems like if you're writing and can't think of something you would just stop writing until you think of it?
oooh very meta "why am I putting background info"
"tormenting" word choice?
wording "had plummeted her public opinion on its own" - implies that the public opinion belongs specifically to her, as opposed to public opinion of her
characterisation is still A+

@ninja_violinist

image: "Dusk" by Ewan Rose


music: "On My Way" by Phil Collins


word prompt: from "The Listeners" by Walter de la Mare

“Tell them I came, and no one answered,
That I kept my word,” he said.
Never the least stir made the listeners,
Though every word he spake
Fell echoing through the shadowiness of the still house
From the one man left awake

@ElderGod-kirky group

crocs do be inspiring me
this is peak nitpick but it sounds like he's describing a political entity in which case it's the UK not Britain. silly distinction, no one cares really, but eh
:( his struggles make me real sad ok
some American slang/phrases? could be a deliberate character voice thing ig
is it called a "spout" of curiosity? or "bout"?
"hurting enough" ok did you have to come for my heart like this
"cracked" prince? interesting choice. my heart. long sentence here, danger loss of focus?

I am but a simple American out in the sticks ghfjg. I'm not fluent in English slang and whatnot lmao
I have no idea if it's spout or bout, because i can't find a single answer from google
beyond that, i am glad i came for your heart muahahahaha

Kora Diary
it's been a few sentences and I'm already living for the chaotic apathy
form journal entry! careful: all I'm reading is through filter of character deliberately writing it out
"of the, what was it? oh, yes, the Kehara" - interesting choice that she would write that process down? seems like if you're writing and can't think of something you would just stop writing until you think of it?
oooh very meta "why am I putting background info"
"tormenting" word choice?
wording "had plummeted her public opinion on its own" - implies that the public opinion belongs specifically to her, as opposed to public opinion of her
characterisation is still A+

one thing to know about kora is that she monologues, even in writing. so whatever she's thinking, she's writing. and it's also to mock the nature of her assignment. there's also some things that she usually wouldn't put, like background, because it's a school assignment and my teacher made requirements, so it was blegh. you won't be getting the rest because it's a lot and i got bored really quickly

@croccin-champagne

nicky shows up
A+ setting up the scene, figuring out which lil details to focus on to make it vivid.
odd wording "shadows would be in full force"?
Ahh this legend! great characterisation, good intro to Caroline. my foolish history heart cries authorship and context but that's not the point
odd wording sentence "Catori, to whom this…"?
If this is Catori limited pov (is it? not entirely sure tbh) then odd choice to mention her eye colour since she doesn't see herself?
…. but what does GFA stand for
odd wording "the colours stuck to"?
Caroline does not mess around eh
"none of us even know" maybe neither instead of none?

lmao ig yeah it's tragic
second sentence a bit long, possible loss of focus?
"covered up" is he wearing contacts?
so she says she "gets where she's coming from" but then three paragraphs later it's "I don't get why hockey is such a big thing for her"?
her attitude to this is so… matter of fact. like hey wow doesn't my life kinda such eh? very nice characterisation there

big yes on submissions you have it down exactly lmao

i'm obviously incredibly smart and a genius, what exactly do you mean when mentioning caroline explaining the myth? also yes she does not fuck around lmao. she's incredibly straight to the point, why bullshit around, and also tact doesn't exist if she's dealing with people her age and i can't wait to write about that being an issue

fair point on the various grammar bits, and i changed the 'colors stuck on' to 'the colors were a' cause it fits better. and gfa stands for ghost fuckers anonymous, obviously


which one seems like a loss of focus? because it probably is but i'm curious

yes he is

uuuhhh fair point, on the confusion, but also consider. she's a teenager who's mom wont let her do things she wants to

and thanks! i think fhdfhv. she gets that way when she's been over the same ramble in her head a million times and has worked everything out

@ninja_violinist

i'm obviously incredibly smart and a genius, what exactly do you mean when mentioning caroline explaining the myth? also yes she does not fuck around lmao. she's incredibly straight to the point, why bullshit around, and also tact doesn't exist if she's dealing with people her age and i can't wait to write about that being an issue

ah, you're right, of course! former gifted kid rights eh
It's just me being dumb about history, tbh. People often interpret myths based on the story alone, which is valid? but it forgets that those myths were written down by someone who lived in a specific context that they were influenced by. (it's not necessarily that that person came up with the myth, but the act of writing it down means they choose which parts to tell and how. Think fairy tales - there are so many different versions of Red Riding Hood, and that's cool, but it absolutely changes the story depending on who tells it.)

So in the case of defending Athena, that's fine? Valid literary interpretation? but for this myth, the most elaborate version we have was written down by Ovid (? I think? I'm not a classicist so don't quote me too closely) who was basically the punk of his time and interested in portraying the gods as capricious, unfair, and wilfully messing around with humans. He definitely didn't like Athena and wasn't interested in making her out to be nice. So the defense of Athena is because we want to like her on a literary level, or because we want women's solidarity, not necessarily because the material for the defense is there in this text. Interpreting the myth like this is an active retelling and reshaping, which is cool!! just. makes my history heart ache a lil bit if people conflate this retroactive recasting with the specific historical myth as such.

that all being said this has absolutely nothing to do with Caroline or your writing and what you've got there is totally fine! I'm just being petty.

and gfa stands for ghost fuckers anonymous, obviously

iconic


which one seems like a loss of focus? because it probably is but i'm curious

so it turns out I straight up didn't see a period that was very much there? so I thought your second paragraph was all one sentence. but you're fine haha

@Moxie group

Hi! I haven't shared something here in a while but I have a poem that I'm fairly proud of, so I figured I'd share it.

Yesterday’s World

In another chapter
When I was a little girl
In a uniform skirt
And a sneakers I had
Tied all by myself
I ran and jumped and played
With my friends, the smell
Of hot rubber and asphalt
Accompanying our adventures
Through space and through time
Our tiny imaginations
Kicking into overtime
We were secret agents
And fairies in a wood
But these moments must
Come to an end.
So I sit in my little chair
Ready to learn.
The coolness of the classroom
Made goosebumps appear on
My sun-brushed skin.
I could still identify that smell today
I don’t know if I’ll ever forget it.
When the bell finally rings,
We wave goodbye. The promise
To do it all again tomorrow
Passes around and satisfies us
The way only chocolate when you’re
Craving something sweet can.