John still didn’t meet Halo’s eyes, not even when the other touched his chin. When Halo kissed him… Something still felt empty about it, something was lost. John had pushed himself so far down, he couldn’t find a way back up. He couldn’t find the ember that he and Halo had at one point shared. He broke away dejectedly to say emotionlesly, “We should get moving, if you feel up to it. The only thing stopping that beast is the sunlight, and nightfall will come eventually.”
Halo looks at John with a broken heart as he pulled away. John hadn't kissed back, he had pulled away. There was no emotion to him. He felt his heart shatter, looking down to the ground, he bites his lip, trying his hardest not to cry. There was no spark in John. Nothing. Halo could feel it. Did John not want him anymore? Was he a burden? A strip of black runs down Halo's pure white hair. The pain of a broken angel. It was a destructive thing, eventually killing a fallen. "Yeah. Let's go." He says quietly, walking past John.
(I’m internally screaming)
John followed wordlessly behind Halo, but his eyes caught on the guardian’s hair. It's because I hurt Halo -he had just been hiding his anger or sadness. It probably shown through angel’s hair. John wished he could just rip himself apart, tear out that part of him that had hurt Halo. He raked his nails down one arm without thinking twice, leaving red irritated lines of skin. It felt… good. Better. Like getting dealt a deserved punishment.
Halo stumbles a little, clutching his stomach, but keeps moving. He was crying silently. He wasn't wanted by John anymore. That meant he had no purpose. An angel without a purpose could die in the matter of weeks. His broken heart couldn't feel a thing, only a resounding pain in his chest, a hurt look in his eyes as he walks. He flutters his wings, but felt no power in them. Like him, they were quickly fading into nothing. He didn't dare look back at John, his heart throbbing at the mere thought. But he was bound to John. He still had to protect him until his dying breath.
It felt like every step made John -not physically- farther away from Halo. He glanced at his longsword -the sword he should’ve done something with before Halo got hurt- then back to his arm. No, you shouldn’t- Just a tiny cut, on the inside of his wrist. Barely noticeable. But if felt a world’s amount of better, if only for a second. Punishment. John had hurt Halo, and he deserved just as much pain.
Halo was quiet, his glass like orbs hidden from the world. He felt numbness and throbs of pain. But every other emotion had left him. He holds his arms. It was only a little while ago that Halo was in John's strong arms, safe as could be, hidden from the world. He heard a crack of footsteps and calling. Halo knew exactly who it was. It was Johns men, searching for him. Their job was to find their captain before hunting Halo. Halo bowed his head. "Sneak back into your camp. Grab clothes and show up. They can't know you were with me." He mutters.
“What about you?” John asked hesitantly, keeping his attention in the direction of the voices. Halo wants me to leave, he wants me to get out of his life, it’s all my fault- John cut himself lightly again in attempt to keep in his tears. He was so lost, and he couldn’t find his way back alone. John clenched his fists slightly, closing his eyes for a second before squaring his shoulders. He could just fake it.
"I'll hide again." Halo says softly. "I'll still be around, keeping you safe." He whispers. He walks to John, placing a gentle hand on his cheek. Even if it killed him, he had to do it one last time. He gently kisses John before pulling away. "I love you." He croaks before turning heel. He begins to walk away from the voices. Walk away from John.
John reached out weakly, but Halo had already turned away. His hands began to shake again, and silent tears poured down his face. Halo hates me, it’s all my fault- “I-I love you Halo,” He responded weakly, turning away too as his shoulders were racked with sobs he kept in. John forced himself to take a step. Then another. That kiss… It’d be the last one. The last thing to ever cherish.
Halo sobs softly into his hand before he stretches out his wings and flies into a tree branch, perching there. He didn't know what to do. Another strip of black runs down his hair as he does so. He curls up, shivering. Missing John's warmth. He wasn't wanted. Needed anymore. He sighs and places his head in his knees. "I love you." He whispers into the night.
John walked like a zombie, emotionless and feeling empty. It wasn’t too long before his men found him, all of them extremely worried and wondering where he had been. John didn’t answer their questions, he only silently cried. The men brought him back to camp, where he didn’t talk. At one point he just cried harder when an official brought up if he’d seen the ‘monster’. John didn’t want to be a Captain of the army, he wasn’t fit for the title anyways. So he cried himself to sleep that night, a comrade by his side the entire time. He could answer question the next day. And John decided he wished he wouldn’t wake up.
Halo flies down into the camp, his eyes dark. He walks into the generals camp, his eyes cast down. "I would like to turn myself in." He whispers, looking up. "I was the monster on the battle field. I was the one healing the other side. I do not wish for any blood to be shed except my own." He says, looking up.
Swords were drawn immediately when Halo entered camp. The general sneered, “You’re the demon they had been talking about… Why are you turning yourself in?” One of the unsaid rules of the army, everything comes with a price. So it was natural for the general to immediately assume trickery.
Halo looks up, pain in his eyes. "I simply want no more war." He says quietly. He looks at the swords and takes a breath. "Just please." He says softly, shaking his head. He takes a breath and looks at the army. "I don't want ant more war." He breathes.
“And what did you do to John? And how do we fix him?” A younger soldier piqued up, but the general let it slide. Most of them were concerned for the captain, he hadn’t spoken a words since the others had found him. It wasn’t natural for Captain Ford to act like that, surely something had happened.
Halos eyes widen slightly. But he takes a breath. "He is unwell?" He asks softly. Of course John was unwell, he was a wreck when Halo had left. "I know if his position. As for what is messed with him, perhaps depression? Loss?" He suggests. He wanted John to have the best medical care. "Unhealthy diet? I have heard of beasts in the forest." He says. "other than me. I met John while in the custody of the opposing side. He was sent back safely, I hope?" He had to keep it together.
“Yes, but even then,” The general narrowed her eyes, “Something had changed in him. I want you to fix it, you said you could heal people. Heal him, and we will consider making your punishment from helping the other side be less harsh,” The general studied the monster. At first glance, it didn’t seem bad. But it was powerful, and you could never trust something like that.
Halos eyes widen and he bows his head. "I can't." He whispers. How could he face John? How could he face the love of his life, the one that no longer wanted him? He couldn't. He still had to float around and protect him, but he couldn't face the man he loved so much but left him. How could he do that? Even if he wanted to… He'd probably burst into tears. "Unless he has physical harm, I cannot help him."
“He has slashes down his arm, one of them is festering. Fix that,” The general demanded coldly. Truthfully, any old doctor could fix up the cuts, bit the general wanted to see the demon at work. She wanted to see the extent of the demon’s power. What gave him the title of demon?
Halo nods slowly and shrinks his wings into his back. He could do that. "Very well." He whispers. He didn't want to see John in pain. He loved John, even if the soldier didn't want him. He deserved the title of demon, since he was such a monster. He had hurt John. "If he is resting, it will make the healing process easier to do." If John was asleep, he wouldn't have to worry about looking John in the eye.
“He’s just this way,” The general turned briskly, not giving a hint at whether John was asleep or not. To be frank, the general wasn’t quite sure anymore. She led Halo to the healer’s tent, to find John turned on his side with his back facing the entryway. The general stepped aside for the demon to enter first.
Halo follows after her, his eyes shifting towards John. He takes a breath before slowly walking towards John. "Captain?" he calls softly as he walks into the tent. His footsteps are slow and quiet, light as a feather as he sits beside the bed.
John heard his voice. He called him by his title, but… Little tears shimmered down his eyes, an endless waterfall, as he turned to look at his angel. John wondered if Halo -gosh, that name- could tell if he refused to eat. He wondered if the angel saw the many cuts John had put on his arm since the time the other left. John had a slight shake to him as his hollow stare stopped just below the other’s eyes, “H-Halo?”
Halo smiles weakly at the other, "H-hey." He whispers softly. He hated seeing John in pain. He reaches a tender hand forward, brushing the stray tears away. "Easy now." He says gently. John… He wanted so desperately to kiss and hold the other. Kiss him and love him. But John didn't want him. He gently takes John's arms and he bites his lip in recognition. "Please don't do this to yourself." He whispers, running his thumb along at the cuts, healing them quickly. "Eat. Sleep. Be healthy. You're a-" His voice cracks and tears slips down his cheeks.
“I hurt you, Halo,” John whispered with lost eyes. He didn’t even know the general was just outside the door watching intently as he spoke, “You hate me…” But John couldn’t stop himself from grabbing onto Halo’s hand in desperation, “How can I be healthy when my compass was ripped away from me? Halo…” I love you. But John couldn’t go too far, he couldn’t intrude. Because he didn't deserve to have Halo in his life, and out of instinct his free hand jerked, going to rake his nails down his arm.