Another frown tugged at the edges of his lips. He didn’t agree with the way Johan rules for the month he was on the throne, but he also didn’t run the entire country into the ground. “He cares about his country, I’m sure. But he really is ruthless. I should have recognized it earlier.” Johan had been strangely withdrawn in the days before Levi was abducted. “I just thought he was still grieving the wound on his face, not planning to attack me.”
"Sometimes we only see what we want to see, prince." Cora patted his hand gently, drawing away from him and Fiori to pull the first loaf of bread from the oven. Fi seemed to have checked out entirely. His eyes were closed, elbows propped up on his knees to keep him upright. "Johan is not an easy man to read." She'd known something was off but she hadn't pushed. Hadn't asked what was wrong. She thought she knew. "It's not your fault that things ended this way, you couldn't have known."
Levi inhaled deeply through his nose. The scent of freshly baked bread wafting through the air made this uncomfortable conversation slightly more appealing. “I don’t think anyone did. Mikhail was just starting to learn how to sword fight from him. My little brother would’ve told me if he thought something was wrong.” He clasped his hands in front of himself, twirling the prince ring around his finger.
Cora nodded as he spoke, pulling Levi's loaf out after a few minutes of contemplative silence. She sliced it, letting the rich smell waft through the kitchen, and passed the first thick slice to Fiori, who hadn't moved. He took it quietly, face blank. She pursed her lips and turned back to the prince. "I don't know, it's all a wash anyways. The past is the past, nothing's going to change that. All we have now are our present choices, slowly shaping the future."
Levi swiped his tongue across his lips. Even his bread looked appetizing. Less pretty than Fi’s, but appetizing. He glanced over to Fiori with another wave of concern in his frown, then back to Cora. “Do you think I made the right choice with Johan? I know it’s not exactly a present choice, but it’s my most recent one.” Not all of his associates agreed with his choice of punishment, and it was clear Johan already hated him for it. Perhaps even more than before.
Cora passed him his own slice and even though her heart screamed that of course he'd made the wrong choice, doing that to her son, she bit her cheek and tried to think about it. Give him a measured, calm response. "I think you did what felt right at the time," was the answer she finally settled on. "It's what he wanted to happen to you, and it might have felt right to force that fate onto him. It might have felt good, even. But… I think a true ruler knows compassion as well as justice."
(and that's. the. tea.)
(the hard-to-swallow pill for the Elerib Brothers)
(Cora really is out here trying to hand out life lessons with the midnight snacks)
Levi took a bite of his bread and chewed it slowly. All things considered, wasn’t the fate he chose for Johan compassionate? His brother still had his life, still had a place—albeit lowly—in the palace, and still had at least some of his hair. The punishment matched the crime, but seeing Johan’s miserable state did anything but make Levi feel better. “If…If I had done nothing, or put him in a cell, he wouldn’t have learned anything. And if I had banished him…” he trailed off. Banishment was a common punishment for the country’s worst criminals. Being the warmer season Johan would have survived, but in the winter months, banishment might as well be an execution.
(and she’s doing great, I’m a big fan)
(the mom instinct)
Cora nodded. "Trust me, prince, I'm grateful every time I see his face that you chose not to banish him. I know people wanted you to. I know you chose mercy. But you know Johan." She met Levi's gaze, steel in her eyes. "You knew when you set the wheels in motion that this is was as close as you could send him to hell without dying and you did it anyways. Don't come to me now that you see the look in his eyes and regret your decisions."
Levi shrunk under her stare. It took all of his willpower not to let his gaze drop to the floor again. He took another bite of his bread, chewed, and swallowed hard. “I’m sorry.” His voice cracked. “But I don’t. I-I can’t. I regret that his pain is hurting you too, but I don’t regret my decisions. He put me through hell too.” And he didn’t even care, he added silently. “I can’t just ignore that when I know he would do it again in a heartbeat given the chance.”
Cora kept watching him, mouth set in a hard line as she sliced through the rest of the loaf. They were divided into even piled, wrapped in crude cloth for the boys to take back to their rooms with them as a snack. "I don't need your apologies prince." She looked him dead in the eyes as she spoke. "Frankly, I don't care why you did it. I care that you did it. There were ways to deal with him that didn't require all of this and you didn't pick them. You wanted him humiliated. You wanted to hit him where it hurt, and you did. Not acknowledging it doesn't make it any less true."
Just as soon as he was about to bite off another piece of bread, Levi let his hand drift downwards. He lifted his eyebrows, staring back at her in shock. He’d asked her if she thought he did the right thing, and he supposed he got his answer. The desire to leave nipped at the back of his neck. “Alright, I acknowledge it. I did.” He moved a fraction of a step towards the door. “But regardless of some of my intentions, it was the best way I could think of dealing with him—Fiori, you agree with me, right?” He flicked his gaze over to his friend.
Cora nodded and dropped some of the intensity she'd been leveling on him, pressing Fiori's bundle of bread into his hands. He seemed a little startled as he accepted it, like he'd forgotten where he was and who was with him. He was still blinking out of his fog when Levi said his name, slowly coming back to life. "Yes?" The whole conversation had been so distant. They were talking about… Johan? About punishment? "Or… I think so, at least." He turned to Cora, taking in the crease between her eyebrows, and took one of her hands gently, sending Levi a nervous glance. "Are you both okay?"
“Yes. I’m fine,” Levi replied, but he didn’t quite believe his own words. Speaking with Cora about his brother had rattled him, made him start to second guess his decisions. A midnight ride through the grove of trees behind the castle would help to clear his mind; he doubted he would be able to sleep anyway. “I should be going soon. Thank you for the bread, Cora. I really… enjoyed our visit.” He let out a shaky breath and finished the last bite of his snack.
Cora nodded, giving Fiori's hand a squeeze before she ushered him over to Levi. "I'm sure you did, prince. It's getting late, I think both of you should be off to bed by now anyways. Have a good night"
Fi nodded, giving her a wan smile and a bland goodbye as he wandered over to the door with Levi in tow behind him. He turned to the prince once Cora was out of earshot, concerned by how rattled he seemed. What had they been talking about? "My friend, you seem… off. Are you quite sure you are okay?"
Levi turned his head back to Fiori now that they were out of the room, and he could relax a bit, but still dazed. He shook his head in reply. “I knew she would be biased towards Johan because of their history together, but I didn’t realize it would bother me so much,” he mumbled. It was by far easier to talk to Fiori about this. “Her wording almost implied that I’m just as callous and cruel as he is for the punishment I decided. She was talking as if he was a victim. And I guess she’s not entirely wrong, but it just didn’t sit well with me.”
Fi nodded, turning the words over in his head. Levi wasn't cruel, he knew that. Levi was kind and careful and wanted what was best for his country, but that didn't make him immune from bouts of cruelty. Vengeance. He glanced over at his friend, taking in the unhappiness on his face. "She is his mother, Leviticus, and you have hurt her son. She is not impartial, not… separate from this the way I am. I do not think it would be wise to take everything she says to heart."
Levito us looked down to the passing ground below them while he listened. Fiori was right, Cora was only acting like a good mother would to protect her son. Levi only wished she would be on his side too. It seemed like such a long time since he had a maternal figure of his own. “Johan is fortunate to have her as a mother. It still hurts but, remembering that, I’ll try not to take it too personally.”
Fi nodded, patting him on the shoulder. "I am sure she will come to like you in time. It seemed like things were going well until you got to the end of the night." He turned down the hallway, towards the room Johan had been left alone in. He tried to ignore the doubt beginning to creep through him, focusing on Levi. "Sometimes people do not act the way we would like them to, but that is no reason to turn up your nose at a good friendship."
“That is good advice.“ Levi glanced up to his upcoming bedroom door. “Next time I visit her I’ll try to avoid talking about Johan. That’s where our conversation seemed to take a turn for the worse.” He had enjoyed talking to Cora when his mind was free of his brother. It would be a shame to refrain from visiting her altogether. “Anyway. To clear my mind I’ll probably take my horse out for a ride. You’re welcome to join me, if you’d like. I just need to change first.”
Fi nodded, smiling as he was invited to join Levi. He hadn't been out for a ride in a long time but he knew it would be just what he needed. Nights in Usige were still and cool, a welcome change from the often unbearable heat and humidity of the day, and he was sure they would be just as pleasent here. At the bery least they would be quiet, and he could look up at the sky and see familiar stars. "I would like that very much, Leviticus. Get me when you are finished changing, and I will accompany you to the stables.
“Perfect, I’ll try not to take too long. Luckily my clothes are already set out from this morning.” Levi’s disposition already seemed to improve with the promise of his friend’s company. He continued on towards his bedroom with a quicker pace than before, eager to take a ride with Fiori as soon as possible. He usually took Mordecai with him for these late night trips, but he assumed his lover would already be fast asleep by now. He’d hate to wake him after such a busy day.
Johan’s door appeared I disturbed. The only sounds coming from inside were the usual cracks and pops emitted by a thriving fireplace. Johan must have been tending to it while Fiori was gone.