“Yeah, obviously not. You’re a little idiot that acts like a feral cat. I was only saying that your height isn’t what makes you so unlikeable, it’s everything else about you.” He spoke as if what he was saying wasn’t incredibly rude, his tone remaining light-hearted. He smiled in satisfaction, leaning back calmly. “And your temper tantrums sure don’t help either.”
He growled. Actually growled, like a dog. "I'm not having a tantrum." He snarled. "Asshole, fuck off. There's nothing wrong with my height."
“That’s what I’m saying,” He stressed with a small laugh. “There’s obviously nothing wrong with your height. You’re just shorter than average. And I’m saying that it’s not a bad thing.”
He glared at Finn again. "Just because you don't like my attitude doesn't mean other people don't. I'm the one that got railed last night while you came home alone." He retorted.
“Because that’s disgusting. I’d rather die alone than take a complete stranger somewhere that private. Do you even understand how many risks that has? Just get a dildo or something if you’re that horny,” he scoffed.
"Duh I understand the risks." He retorted. "That's what a condom is for, you dick. And a dildo is not the same thing as a person. People are more fun."
“Have you seriously not even considered that they are complete strangers? That’s how you get murdered, moron. You think a dingy motel is gonna look that far into it if you mysteriously disappeared? Or even if your body was found out in the dumpster?” Finn rolled his eyes.
He narrowed his eyes. "I'm careful, Finn. I can defend myself if necessary." and it wouldn't be his first brush with death, either. "And I have mace if I need it, assface."
“And you’re also exclusively into men comically larger and stronger than you. You really think that if it came down to it you could fight someone like that off?” Not that Finn cared, obviously. Why would he?
"One, I'm bisexual, not gay." he pointed out. "I also enjoy, on occasion, the company of women. Two, just because I enjoy being pinned and absolutely destroyed doesn't mean I couldn't defend myself." he crossed his arms again, eyes narrowed up at Finn. "I could fight you."
“Yeah, all right. Still doesn’t disprove my point that one day you’re gonna pick the wrong person and get murdered and stuffed in a dank fridge somewhere.” Finn ran a hand through his hair, exasperated but not entirely unamused. “Right. Sure you could.”
Waylen nodded sharply. "I could." he said again. "And I won't get murdered, Finn. Most murderers target twinks or women and I don't qualify as either." sure, he was short, but he was just a little too bulky in the shoulders and had too many tattoos to qualify as a twink, and he wasn't a woman either.
“Right, because only women and twinks have ever been murdered, no one else.” He raised an eyebrow judgmentally. “And maybe you could, but not without getting a boner,” he retorted with a grin.
"Well they're the most common category." he replied, wrinkling his nose at Finn. At the accusation, his eyes narrowed again. "I would not get a boner from fighting you, you dick, where's your proof?"
“Because I’d win and you’d end up pinned to the ground. You’ve literally told me how that gets your rocks off like ten times in the past five minutes,” Finn huffed.
He frowned. "I only said it once. Maybe twice. And that's not applicable in all situations, Jesus Christ. If I, for example, had a bondage kink and liked being tied up, that doesn't mean that if I was kidnapped and tied up that I would enjoy it."
Finn nodded slowly. “Right. Yeah. So if I pinned you to the ground right now- if I was on top of you, had you fully at my disposal- you’re saying you wouldn’t get a hard-on?” He was teasing, of course- he had no doubt in his mind that Waylen would hate that nowadays. It was entertaining to make fun of him, though.
He shifted, pretending to consider the question. "I would not, no. Sadly for you, I'm not attracted to you like that anymore." he replied, shrugging his shoulders. Truth was, he did still find Finn just the tiniest bit attractive. Just a little bit. But it didn't affect him, and he certainly wouldn't get hard if Finn pinned him.
“You’re right, I’m absolutely devastated.” Finn smirked teasingly, crossing his arms as he looked down at Waylen. “You wanna bet on that?” He had to admit that perhaps he was getting a bit too much amusement out of this, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. It wasn’t his fault that everything else to do here was incredibly boring.
He narrowed his eyes at the taller man. "What, bet that you're devastated? Of course I would, I would be devastated if such an attractive man as me said that he wasn't interested."
“Come on, you can’t be that stupid.” Finn rolled his eyes. “You know what I meant, dumbass. If you’re going to be like that, just shut your mouth.”
"Oh, did you mean that I would sprout a boner because of you? My mistake." He replied, laughing and shaking his head at the other man.
“…Are you done now? God, you’re intolerable.” Finn sighed, bringing a hand up to his forehead. “Y’know if you weren’t so terrible to be around, maybe you’d be able to get someone to pay attention to you for more than a single night.”
He almost flinched, then his lip curled into a smirk. "Maybe I don't want the hassle of a settled relationship, dick." he retorted. "Maybe I'd rather get fucked by a different person every night, yeah? More variety and excitement that way."
“Right. I’m sure it’s very fun for you to never have anyone that genuinely cares about you.” He only realized how harsh that was once the words had left his mouth and fuck, he hadn’t meant to be that mean. No going back now though, he supposed. Not like Waylen would even show any genuine emotion. He never did.