forum Your personal venting space.

Started January 17, 2019 by @The-N-U-T-Cracker

tune

Notebook has changed my life for the better.

I'm glad!

Notebook has changed my life for the better.

I'm glad!

I know.

Joining notebook was honestly one of the best decisions I made in my life.

Joining notebook was honestly one of the best decisions I made in my life.

Same…

Joining notebook was honestly one of the best decisions I made in my life.

Ditto!

Joining notebook was honestly one of the best decisions I made in my life.

Same here. There's no place like Notebook!

Joining notebook was honestly one of the best decisions I made in my life.

Same!

Update: My grandma brought out a thing of vanilla ice cream and said “I don’t care if you eat the whole thing” so now I am feeling much less grumpy

Update: My grandma brought out a thing of vanilla ice cream and said “I don’t care if you eat the whole thing” so now I am feeling much less grumpy

asdflskjflsjflkjas;dfjsalkfdjalsjkfa I wish I had ice cream

Update: My grandma brought out a thing of vanilla ice cream and said “I don’t care if you eat the whole thing” so now I am feeling much less grumpy

asdflskjflsjflkjas;dfjsalkfdjalsjkfa I wish I had ice cream

Can I have some?? _please??

Update: My grandma brought out a thing of vanilla ice cream and said “I don’t care if you eat the whole thing” so now I am feeling much less grumpy

I want your grandma.

Update: My grandma brought out a thing of vanilla ice cream and said “I don’t care if you eat the whole thing” so now I am feeling much less grumpy

asdflskjflsjflkjas;dfjsalkfdjalsjkfa I wish I had ice cream

Can I have some?? _please??

yeets ice cream at all of you along with a cookie it’s from my grandma so you know it’s good

Okay this is a conversation I had with someone else and they haven’t responded, it’s word for word i copied and pasted it I just think everyone needs to know, well the people who care anyways… Well life fucking hates me in every way. My grandma cancelled my doctors appointment so I can’t leave early. Mom better let me go to Emi’s or I’m going to loose all sanity. The one thing, THE ONE THING I WAS HOPING FOR ENDED UP NOT EXSISTING SO NOW I HAVE TO STAY IN THIS HELL HOLE FOR ANOTHER HOUR AND THIRTY MINUTES I’M SO MAD RIGHT NOW! I hate this. I would have been fine with not going to Emi’s if they took me, yet then again I would have been a bit upset about it but not that much. Now I have to try not to cry for longer, not try to kill myself, or kill someone else. At least when I’m with Emi I can smile, be happy for once, loose all sadness and be myself. Around my parents and grandma I can’t, because then they try to but into my business and if I ever told them I would be stuck in Brooklane which would make me feel worse because it’s basically a depression conversion therapy thing, and I don’t want to be away from notebook and Emi for at least a week. Yes, it takes that long. So it’s not like I can just go up to my mom and say hey, I want to kill myself and I think everyone hates me. I think I’m garbage and I should just be killed before I infect earth with my face. I can’t just put that on my moms shoulders. She will get very upset that I didn’t tell her before, and will probably get PTSD from when Clarasa did the same. I just NEED to see Emi this weekend, I need to be away from my parents, I need to practice my instrument, I need to lower my stress, I need to talk about my feelings with my actual voice, I need this. I need to finally be happy. I need my depression to go away. I can’t take this much longer, if I keep trying my mind will taunt me, and eventually I’ll give up. I ask for just one weekend, I’ll pray for it, I’ll do it right now in class! I’ll let the tears flow! I’ll do anything just to be with Emi for a day to help me FIX my problems! I don’t even see my Therapist for two weeks, and she tells on me! I told her about being a Lesbian and that I wanted to tell my mom in a couple of weeks she told her when I came back from her office! How do I know she won’t tell my mom that I’ve been having suicidal thoughts and I have self doubts? I’m unsure of how to solve it… last time I went to Emi’s I felt amazingly happy, I finally felt like a normal person, then when I came back I returned to normal, as in I’m not depressed. Then life tells me to fuck off and drops news bombs or more depression on my house of life. Like the time when my mom told me my brother might die, or when my grandfather died which gave me depression. I could go on and on about this….

Tell this person that I will be thinking of ways to help him solve that problem. I won't give up until I found a way to reunite them. I'm on the case.

Now I’m overly confused. I can’t do anything without getting sidetracked… hell, I can’t even draw if I wanted to…

Now I’m overly confused. I can’t do anything without getting sidetracked… hell, I can’t even draw if I wanted to…

I want you to take a break. Look up of mindfulness video, and do mindfulness. Okay? Are you able to do that or you in class?

Now I’m overly confused. I can’t do anything without getting sidetracked… hell, I can’t even draw if I wanted to…

I want you to take a break. Look up of mindfulness video, and do mindfulness. Okay? Are you able to do that or you in class?

I’m in class, as it read, my doctors appointment was cancelled so I’m staying in school till 3:30.

Oh. Well I'm here for you to talk to if you everNeed.

I’m just going to play my game during art…. I don’t like doing that to the teacher but I don’t want to force myself to draw when it hurts my heart… maybe if I go to Emi’s, then I’ll be able to draw without pain again…

I totally understand.

hugs Kylee like a cute snek hugs a teddy bear

Update: My grandma brought out a thing of vanilla ice cream and said “I don’t care if you eat the whole thing” so now I am feeling much less grumpy

asdflskjflsjflkjas;dfjsalkfdjalsjkfa I wish I had ice cream

Can I have some?? _please??

yeets ice cream at all of you along with a cookie it’s from my grandma so you know it’s good

YUM!

I’m going to go some what silent right now. I’ll respond to stuff but not quickly.

I’m going to go some what silent right now. I’ll respond to stuff but not quickly.

Ok!

Me too, it has helped me break out of my negative cycle of depression, anxiety and self hatred. It's a really magical place.