forum Your personal venting space.
Started by @The-N-U-T-Cracker
tune

people_alt 117 followers

@Knight-Shives group

I filled out a character sheet but I made it myself for one of the character discussions and…
This is my personality…

Quiet, though with some people can talk about random stuff forever, reserved, observation, a mess, depressed, socially anxious, dark minded, nice though sometimes not perceived that way, smart?, Low self-esteem and no self confidence (no confidence at all actually), hates socializing

I am a left handed self deprecating depressed being who thinks nothing of themself…

@Trix

My immature, childish self: Wait, you're left-handed? I always thought being left-handed was wicked cool. I've tried and failed to teach myself to be ambidextrous many a times, just so I could do stuff with my left hand.
My mature(questionable), sarcastic, depressing and altogether more boring self: Fam, edit that question mark off the post, and you forgot amazing, creative, clever, humorous, wonderful humanoid on the list of traits ;)

@Overdoneyanoveltropeyesplease

To preface this, I love my boyfriend. But he pulled some shit today. We were video chatting, like we do frequently. As I mentioned earlier, my mom put up some new summer rules about using our devices and whatever. I had been using my iPad anyway, but I decide to go ahead and comply and do my laundry, so I was folding it while we talked. Then I had to hang up for dinner. I told him after dinner we were going to go buy new earbuds, and he said to text him when I got back home. We were out for a little longer than I expected, but I got back in enough time for us to continue talking. I open my new earbuds, excited to have them while we talked. I text him. Nothing. I text again. No reply. I’m an anxious person, and my mind like to fill in the blanks based on what it knows, and then pick the worst possible outcome and decide it’s reality. My boyfriend has a history of depression and things associated. So after a while, despite my work to keep it from happening, I start to come up with the worst possible scenarios. He finally texts me back. He fell asleep, which I suspected he might have on accident. But turns out he deliberately took melatonin in order to do so, meaning he did it on purpose but didn’t think to inform me before he fell asleep, despite knowing full well that I will worry. He sends me another message on Hangouts saying he couldn’t call again and he’d tell me why tomorrow. This likely means that something happened in the approximately two hours I was gone, but like usual, he was going to be cryptic and evasive with the information. Now I’m upset because I was looking forward to talking to him, I was excited to use my new earbuds, I did my laundry so we could talk, and then because he didn’t tell me that he was going to sleep even though it was planned and despite knowing that I could get really worried. Makes me wonder if he listens when I tell him things. Makes me wonder if he got so worked up over whatever it is that he couldn’t be bothered to send a simple text message. That he doesn’t trust me. That maybe he doesn’t remember or care enough to remember what I’ve told him. But I’ll just have to wait until tomorrow to talk to him.

@GameMaster group

I get being angry at someone for not understanding your situation but in that case give him the chance to explain himself. If his reason isn't good enough then you can decide if you want to be mad at him.

Deleted user

i followed one of your boards (i'm @ hollow-boned)

I’m Luna Solace! MAGNUS CHASE IS MY FAVORITE BOOK SERIES EVER!!! (You probably already know that though 😆)

I followed you both

@Trix

I get being angry at someone for not understanding your situation but in that case give him the chance to explain himself. If his reason isn't good enough then you can decide if you want to be mad at him.

Yeah I agree. He probably should've sent you a message before taking the melatonin, though, but then again you don't know what happened in those two hours. I think he has the right to decide he needs to sleep if something bad happened. Also, I don't think he's being evasive or doesn't trust ya. He probably just needs time alone to himself to think or calm down before telling others.

@fruitbatsandearlgrey

Here's my vent because I have nowhere else to type it! Yay me!

In my life, I am constantly either underestimated or held to the highest possible standards, mostly by my parents. My mom just came into my room yelling about how my grade has dropped to a B in one class, oH nO, hOw DaRe HeR dAuGhTeR bE aNyThInG lEsS tHaN pErFeCt, how can she EVER bear to know she's been such a TERRIBLE parent, she's raised a SIMPLY AVERAGE CHILD, et cetera, et cetera. Never mind that she just forced me to LEAVE THE COUNTRY THE WEEK BEFORE FINALS for reasons I won't go into too much cause that would take like three paragraphs of context, and that I have been doing about five extracurriculars and been on the honor roll every semester since middle school, AND I'm dealing with a whole lot of things in my life falling apart (which, again, would take three more paragraphs of context) AND SHE KNEW I WAS STRESSED ABOUT THEM, she just CANNOT have a child with a B in one class, oh the tragedy, oh the horror. And she doesn't even bother to think that maybe I'M disappointed in myself too??? She knows that I've had a really big perfectionist complex all my life, which makes me feel really insecure because I can never BE perfect and that kills me to just think about, but all she does is make it worse by making me feel like I need to be the perfect daughter in the first place. I'm so mad and I'm really sorry for ranting and disturbing you all but with all the crap I've been going through in the last month a B in one class is the least of my worries.

@Pickles group

It's not disturbing us at all! That's what this is for. I don't have any advice, so sorry about that but someone else probably does shrugs

@amber_is_in_a_loop

I know exactly what you're feeling. The pressure that the people around you put on you is absolutely unbearable, and then you feel guilty about being any better, but you still want to be better and there goes an extra ton of pressure coming from yourself. I know hard it is to deal with especially when it's more than just grades.
The only thing I could say to you, honeslty, is take one step back. Just take a step back and take a breather. You're doing amazing, you really are. Where you are is good. I know it doesn't feel like it but that's because those good times will come. Everything you're doing now is a step in the right direction for you. Only you, because in these really awful moments you have to take a moment and take care of you.
I know how hard that is, but try to acknowledge that yeah, you're not perfect in your mother's eyes, but you are doing eveything you can and that is all that matters. And if she doesn't get that it isn't your fault.
I'll say it again, take a breather, look around at the incredible things you're doing, and just keep going. It does get better.

Deleted user

I really really really wish I didn't relate to that, and I'll probs be back around midnight for context before I cry myself to sleep, again.

Deleted user

Like I said before, I'll be back with context, maybe, but overall I've spent a good portion of the last hour(?) crying.

Deleted user

My parents want me to get a job but they also won't let me

How the hecc does that work?!

@Pickles group

They're like, you need a job, and then they'll be like, you're too busy for a job, and refuse to take me to apply anyway

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