forum Poems and Excerpts and Such

Started July 14, 2018 by @Natasha

tune

i love your's sky!

So um, does anyone want to hear mine? I mean its not as good as all of yours and…um i dunno if its even a poem….so yeah.

We'd love to hear it
They're all great
Like
Idk how you all come up with them

           ~depression~ 

I don't want to be alive, but I don't want to die,
I don't want to starve, but I don't want to eat another,
I don't want to talk, but I don't want to be lonely,
I don't want to try, but I don't want to give up.
I just don't.

same

It's a great poem

THank you, I know it's not that great like all the others, but I tried.

It is good tho. It takes a lot of thought

Thank you!

Wow
That was good
Really sad, but also thoughtful
I felt that
Thanks for sharing it with us

Thank you, It means a lot, I was sad that day too though.

i love your's sky!

So um, does anyone want to hear mine? I mean its not as good as all of yours and…um i dunno if its even a poem….so yeah.

Thanks guys! I don’t like showing people my writing but I’m trying to improve cuz I’m attempting to write a book

I'm running
To catch up again,
Down yellowed pavement,
Swimming through Summer's air,
And bleeding,
Like the morn's rosy Dawn,
I've packed my bag,
And I'm gone.

My heart's clapping,
Like my shoes,
My knees are easy to exhaust,
Like my heart,
Let me get lost…

To Trickle down the fingers of the streets,
Until I'm worn so thin,
I cease to exist,
And I can begin again,
And persist.

Nice! It's got a very nice rhythm to it

Nice!

Her wings clipped, and locked in a cage
Forced to act, the world was a stage
Tired now, she sat on her swing
The cage door opened, and he came in
She trusted him and he trusted her
They sat together like two lovebirds
But when freedom called, she left him to die
And spread her wings, attempting to fly
She fell to the ground, with a broken heart
Faster and faster, she fell like a dart
He came after her, and softened her fall
In doing that, he lost it all
She weeped in anger, sadness, and love
She stood beside him, free as a dove
Freedom was a a forgotten hope
As around her neck, was a necklace of rope

Awh thanks

April come she will
When streams are ripe and swelled with rain
May she will stay
Resting in my arms again
June she'll change her tune
In restless walks she'll prowl the night
July she will fly
And give no warning to her flight
August die she must
The autumn winds blow chilly and cold
September I remember
A love once new has now grown old

(This is a gorgeous Simon and Garfunkel song… it's quite, well- soft)

Ok, this one makes absolutely no sense, and the pacing is all off, but I thought I show y'all anyway

No one knows her name,
And no one sees her face,
But at night she visits crying eyes,
And sings them songs of peace,
She wears a cloak of rain and jewels,
And a crown of stars upon her head,
One night she sat beside my bed,
And held my hand in tight a grasp,
“Don’t fear, child,” was all she said,
“Darkness will fade, but light will last,
And sunshine breaks through dirty glass,”

Her brother visits me as well,
And his touch is icy cold as Hell,
He appears on bathroom floors at night,
In silver blades, at three A.M.,
He wear clothes too big for his frame,
And laughs loud and long at my fright,
He talks of death, and looks the same,
One night he sat beside my feet,
And sang me songs of my defeat,
“Don’t listen to the queen of hearts,
She has a silver tongue,
Lies spew from her eyes and ears,
And smothers everyone.”

I really like it! Although, in order to tie the two together, you might consider adding another stanza? Maybe about the brother and sister together, instead of each separately. Just to make it flow a bit better.

Yeah, that would probably be better
I wrote it at like midnight last night, so it's not exactly coherent XD

I just rapped your poem, I don't know whats wrong with me.

It seems pretty coherent to me! It just felt abrupt at the end. I like the imagery, and the idea behind it. It has a nice rhythm too –I didn't stop at any point because a word felt off or anything.

I just rapped your poem, I don't know whats wrong with me.

Ooh, that sounds like fun

So I’m writing a song called shattered. It’s about a girl whose heart was broken and she stopped loving. I have the beginning but I can’t get the words right.