forum I'm Actually Dying of Boredom

Started May 24, 2019 by @Simon-Says

tune

Lmao sorry I was tired as hell and I'm fUCKIN RETARDED when I'm tired

lmao, same

And bitchy, apparently, according to my mom.

I legit just woke up, and she's acting like I'm giving her some sort of attitude when all I'm doing is trying to make my brain work properly.

Not right now, but yesterday. I took a nap

Lmao I literally can't function as a human when I'm tired.

Exactly. And the thing that should clue you into how tired I was: I legit never take naps, and I fell asleep really fast when the tiredness hit.

Oh yeah, same. I'll be like WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT I'M FINE SHUT UP and then I just heckin pass out.

D'you think my new profile pic fits my sort of mysterious cave dweller sorceress persona for this site? Or should I go with this:

Hm, I think they both work, either way. They give off the same vibes.

That's a lot of help

Kidding, I'm kidding. Sarcasm is my default language.

Lmao sorry. Eh, I'm used to sarcasm, I'm in theater, it's the official language of the territory.

Ah, so I'd fit right in, in that aspect. But the actual acting part I would die.

That reminds me of one time in English. We had to do a presentation about the Crucible and some theme or something about it, and I had forgotten to print out my notes. And you know what I did? I stared right at the class and just spoke. I winged it, and I had hardly any nerves. After the fact, I felt so accomplished with myself.

And then my teacher rained on my party and docked points. I don't even know why, so I'm a little pissed.

Eh, I personally can't relate (cause… despite what most people think, I love attention and getting leads) but if you're in ensemble, you don't even really have to act, just dance… and… at least try to sing. But I can totally understand stage fright, if that's what you meant… though I'm not sure it is. I am literally shaking and my heart is just judo flipping the crap out of my lungs before every show.

Damn, I hate that. It's really weird how things work so differently with different teachers. Like, my science teacher would ONLY give me 100% if I wrote out my work like "well, you see, the lava flows through this awesome thing called the (insert name). And basically it's like a straw." He wanted me to use my actual voice, whereas my honors english teacher WILL NOT accept work that isn't written in formal tone.

I hate being the center of attention. I used to do Chorus and was fine with that, as there was a group of people working together and I just kinda blended into the group. But group presentations or going up in front of the class in general to present something really bothers me.

Also, I don't dance, and nor do I sing very well.

Same. I'm alright going on stage with a large group of people, but solos or even single lines will terrify me. Days before class presentations I would find myself in a bathroom at midnight trying not to throw up because of how uncomfortable I was and anxious. I'm self-conscious enough as it is, I don't need a class full of people staring me down as I try to explain how the Egyptians built and designed architecture.

Small rant on presentations. I hate them. See, I do this mental olympic thing where I calculate the groups in the class and do a short countdown. You can never go first because… ew, but you can't go last either - everyone remembers the first and last presentations. Then there's also logistics; you don't want your group to look terrible so you can't go after a good group. You have to go after a mediocre one. And usually as the projects pass by your heart speeds faster and faster anticipating the fact that you have to present soon.
Then while presenting… where the hecc do I look? The teacher(might be awkward)? My friends(probably a bad idea since you'll laugh)? Do I burn a hole into the opposing wall while reciting lines like a robot(makes one appear hypnotized)? Should I gesture to the poster/slideshow while presenting? On that note, what do my hands do?? Should they move naturally like a conversation, be formally pressed against my sides, fumble with a pencil or the edges of my clothing?
My voice. I'm a quiet person, generally, so I need to project it. But not so much that it strains the muscles. The sound must be soft, pleasing, but still loud and authoritative. If you have to hesitate, say 'umm', glance at the words on the project too much, it sounds unprepared, awkward, and altogether not done well. Then tone. How much passion do you let slip or release? It sounds stupid to dramatically decipher how math functions work, but a Siri voice is annoying, and makes the class drown in boredom.
The words. Obviously you shouldn't say word for word what you have written down but you need to summarize main points, right? Now do you explain things in your own voice or formally? Should you add personality and character to how you explain things? That certainly makes a subject much more intriguing… but much less formal.
And the ending. I hate the ending. Do you end on a 'Thank you for listening'? Or perhaps 'any questions'? (This is always tricky because you'll either have that one person who finds holes in the presentation, quizzes you on your subject, or nobody will raise their hand as you fidget nervously and awkwardly smile for a prolonged silence.) Do you give no indication that you are over and instead simply wait there in silence for applause? If it's a longer, more solo-esque presentation should one even go to the extremes of the bow?
wa;wodkvnawopei Presentations are hard.

Lmao same. I mean… I've been told that I can sing… but I've also been told I was pretty, so…. But I seriously SUCK at learning dances. Once I know them, I'm all set, but it takes me SO LONG to remember what happens at what time, what the heck kind of motion is that, OH SHIT I'M SUPPOSED TO CROSS THE STAGE, and I'll spend half the dress rehearsals going welp, I missed that move. Dammit, next time. Okay, next time. Ahm, what the hell do we do here? Ehe, ok IMPROVISE.

Ah yes my acting days, those were the days when we would sit in the out side amphitheater for hours waiting for the teacher to come get us to start rehearsal, those where the day's when I was the cool one for being the lead or the soloist…. what were we talking about again sorry I got caught up in a monologue

Lmao

OH

I just remembered that I got my schedule for next year—and that my sister is coming up into the high school building. She has history the period before I have history, and it's the same teacher. So when she's leaving, I'm coming in.

Oh, that's cool! I was moved ahead a year in the middle of first grade, plus my birthday's in August, so I started school as soon as was humanly possible, so my sister's going to be in 7th grade when I graduate, which kinda sucks, cause it was fun trying to embarrass my sister when she was in kindergarten. sigh those were the days.

lmao. That's the only time I can see her, unless she has the same lunch as me, because I'll be at a different school half of the day.

Egh, tis I, the potato sorceress:

Circe omg you're adorable stop. OH. SIS. I DREW A THING. This is like one of the VERY few things that I've drawn that I'm actually proud of. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1GxGe6zOr7Rt6JfMBdHsPWZy13PXx1as5f84InyT4IwA/edit?usp=sharing Ignore the sketchy heart. I didn't even mean to draw Kirby, but I got like halfway though and was like "huh. I've drawn Kirby."

Aww, it's so cute!

And I disagree with the adorable

ACCEPT IT
ACCEPT IT LIKE I CAN'T.

Lmao my friend posted a drawing of me on DeviantArt and she captioned it "a drawing of my cute best friend" and I was like… wait what friend. WHERE ARE YOU HIDING THE CUTE FRIEND.

lmao

Agh, when I get called cute or adorable, it just makes me think of my height. I'm. So. SHORT. It's not even funny, especially when I remember my fucking giraffe of a friend.

Oof, I feel you. I'm barely 5 foot, but I don't really think of small when I think of cute, cause I've been calling anything I like "cute" since I was like 5. Ugh, I literally CANNOT with compliments tho. I hide my face every time without fail like I genuinely can't. handle it.