Buckley Ryan Foster

Love interest of Lane Miller

Buck. Lets face it, Buckley's pretty adorable, Buck's a little more serious and badass.

Male, cis, he/him.

28

6'10"

reddish brown, but pretty dark

Classic fade, maybe a little longer on top that your average military Joe. Straight, unlike him.

Clean shaven

Chocolate brown, does NOT shine gold in the sun. Tiny bit void-like in the right light.

He's white

Buck was graced with the ideal male body type according to the alpha males. He's tall, strong, and he's just this slightly thin waist to make all the ladies and the gaydies swoon.

He's picked up some scars on his face throughout his years. He broke his nose getting bucked off a green-broke mare as a young teen. She sent him straight into a fencepost, and messed his face up pretty good. His nose is still crooked, and he has a scar where the skin was ripped right off.

He also as a scar that travels through his hairline, and makes his hair grow all weird there. It travels out onto his forehead a little. He cannot get his hair to grow flat or straight there, it cow-licks and sticks out all over the place, so eventually he just gave up. This was also from a horse incident, another untrained two year old got a burr cactus stuck in his nose and when Buck tried to pull it off the horse struck out with its front hoof, hitting him in the head and splitting his skull open :) That one needed twenty-seven stitches, and an overnight stay in the hospital.

Actually, almost all of his facial scars are ranch-related. He's also missing a bit of his left ear, but this one was in his late teens, right before he enlisted. It quite simply just got ripped off by a coyote. Now coyotes don't attack humans, unless said human physically tackles it to save a barn cat from becoming a midnight snack. He'd heard the ruckus and a cat screaming, and when he saw his favorite barn cat being cornered by a coyote, he jumped right out the window and just grabbed that coyote and hurled it off into the night. He didn't realize until later it had taken a bit of him with it. (the cat got to spend the night inside after that).

The final one is service related, but nothing heroic or super traumatic. During a training exercise, his squad was navigating some rough back country terrain in the mountains, and he tripped and fell and split his face open on a jagged rock. The scar is mostly hidden, running along the underside of his right jaw, but it forks up onto his cheek just a little bit. The rock definitely won that round. (years later he was in the same location and he has a picture on his phone somewhere of him kicking the rock and then posing next to it with a thumbs up. His squad thought that was hilarious)

General:
- Folded arms are the one and only thing keeping him from standing around like an unrigged 3D model all the time. He's <3 awkward <3
- He's actually got a plethora of good jokes up his sleeves, though you'd never expect. He pulls them out so rarely as well, and it always catches everyone by surprise when he does. He's very off the cuff about his jokes, and part of his humor is the heart stopping moments you're not sure if he's being serious or if it's okay to laugh. Only those really close to him can get the jokes right away every time.
- Pretty quiet, though not monosyllabic.
- Won't go out of his way to be friendly 9/10 times
- Always respectful of everyone though, just on a human level. Will never think it's okay to bully someone or treat them poorly just because he doesn't like them.

Anger:
- When Buck is actually angry, he goes very quiet.
- Frigid. Ice cold.
- He probably will never disagree with you about anything, but he'll really crank up the Southern Hospitality, and his replies will turn into general, noncommittal/nonabrasive comments like the old "Well I s'pose so," or just a simple "Yeah."
- If he ever loses his temper, and thats a big if, he will get momentarily very intense, lots of eye contacts, and he'll get right in your space while he very quickly and quietly tells you to knock it off, then 2 seconds later it's like nothing every happened.

Happiness:
- This is when the jokes come out most frequently. He loves goofing off with the crew.
- It's easy to tell he's happy, because he just,,, smiles about it. To himself, not at anybody. He's just happy.
- Suddenly gets very friendly.
- Consciously thinks about the songs stuck in his head.
- Happiness like this is a rare occurrence.

Scared:
- He is the danger, but when he sees danger, its all business. He takes care of his own first and foremost.
- All his discomfort around physical touch melt away.
- He talks in very short, efficient sentences.
- Will tell you to shut up if you aren't taking it seriously.

Relaxed:
- He naps
- Posture gets real bad, he's a sloucher and leans against things like there's no tomorrow
- Approachable
- Very quick to throw his guard up again unless he's certain it's safe and safe for a long time
- Snarky comments from the corner while others are goofing around
- The southern drawl actually shows it's full face
- Might actually talk about his past beyond the fun stories.

Bored:
- This is when the jokes start to come out.
- Usually only happens in groups of people he doesn't know well, when he's with friends he's never really bored.
- Spaces out hardcore, like just stares at the wall or out the window, no thoughts head empty.
- Draws people he knows and writes little notes about them in his notebook.

Sad:
- Emotionally unavailable
- "I'm fine" and he sounds like he means it
- Hasn't shed a tear in twelve years
- Will either shut himself away from the world and isolate, or get clingy to his group and stay on the edges and not want to be bothered, and there is no in-between.
- Works. Draws. Reads. Distracts.

Sleep:
- He sleeps lightly, and tends to be a tossy turny type. Somehow gets refreshing rest every night anyway.
- Gets cold easily, he has a lot of blankets
- Falls asleep pretty easy unless he has a reason to be uncomfortable falling asleep, at which point he will spend hours on his phone just scrolling
- Needs a little light, and dead silence

Trauma Response:
- Rigid. Stiff as carboard.
- No expression, eyes just the slightest bit too wide.
- No emotional response in his voice, he sounds perfectly normal.
- Now he's monosyllabic.
- Defaults to 'yes sir' 'no sir' doesn't matter who you are
- Defaults to military settings, will apply himself single-mindedly to his job while being totally disassociated
- IF, and only if, you are super, super close to him and persistent, will he finally crack and cry.
- The only time he finds comfort in hugs.
- Alternately, DO NOT TOUCH. It could send him into a panic, and he will break things to get away from you.

Embarrassed:
- Gets tiny
- Becomes a greenscreen and is The Background
- Shy
- Overly apologetic
- Eventually just shuts up and avoids the person or situation
- Will never talk about it ever again outside of therapy

Stressed:
- Needs space
- Needs quiet
- Needs support, or it can turn into an anxiety attack
- Never fidgets, goes even more still
- No eye contact no eye contact no eye contact no-

Escaping the gay agenda, he's strAIGHT DAMMIT

He's a lil cold, a lil mean on purpose, he's kinda spooky to have around, communicates verbally less than he should, and will make all sorts of mistakes and promises for those he really cares about. But he doesn't know that about himself yet.
He's also, though not socially unconfident, still very awkward. Bull in a china shop anyone?
Can't ride motorcycles :(

Man I wish I had emojis that would make this whole experience better but

~INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA~

Not aimed at anyone else. He don't care if you're gay. HE'S gay and that's what bothers him. No, no, sorry. Said that wrong. He's NOT gay, and NOTHING'S bothering him. You saw nothing else.

• Looming


• Staring


• Picking up heavy objects


• Making the ladies feel very safe


• He got a nice voice not that he'd EVER sing. (Okay, you might get a country song out of him if you really try, but probably just the chorus)


• Sliding under the gaydar


• Aim. Like, with a gun.


• Surviving


• Sneaking, despite his size

• Bit of a gamer (bit cracked)


• Reading


• hanging out with his few very close friends and just shooting the shit (AKA being very straight)


• Being a wallflower


• Hitting the gym, but only with the ladies


• He's a bit of an artist, though really only draws the people he knows, he's not super creative

Buck is kinda hard to get to know, but he's not unfriendly, he's just...quiet and aloof and grumbly. You can tell pretty fast that he's a good person though, since his friend group is pretty large and everyone in it seems happy to be around him all the time. This can occasionally lead to new friends thinking he doesn't like them specifically, but other are quick to reassure.
He generally only talks when talked to, or when he really has to add to the conversation, but he's not monosyllabic. He's full of learned confidence, and really isn't shy. His friends would describe him as friendly, gentle, and kind, but anyone else would describe him as scary and cold.
Which he is. He's not always eager to make new friends, and is sometimes a little mean on purpose, to keep himself from having to get involved with another person.

He's a closeted Hufflepuff hiding in a Gryffindor's skin, a badass warrior, courageous and powerful, but also loyal, and all the other puff qualities. Outwardly he's the Imperial March, internally, he's Dreamcore music or the Minecraft soundtrack.

In a nutshell, he's what I would call grumpy but willing.

Religious trauma :)

He's a Good Christian Boy tm but out of fear

Moderate, raised conservative, doesn't hate liberals, so stuck in the middle and tries not to think about it.

Military, first lieutenant

Yellow

Fuckin,,, barbeque baby, he's Texan

His journal/planner thing. It has everything in it from doodles, to fully rendered sketches, to notes about his day and or feelings, to tactical plans and ideas to to-do lists. It, unlike the rest of his life, is very unorganized.

He's had this Colt M1911 .45 for ages, hardly goes anywhere without it. But he was raised on buckshot and has a pretty strong nostalgic incline for shotguns.

He's SUCH a cat person.

But snakes.

He trained as infantry and paratrooper, currently enlisted in a specialized company of elite foot soldiers called Company 18. Company 18 is comprised of seventy infantry/paratrooper soldiers who've received additional training in sniping, infiltration, extraction, and wilderness survival. They are mobilized behind enemy forces and act as a lightning strike team that weakens enemies with brutal surprise attacks. They've been deployed a handful of times, and they've proved to be exceptionally effective. Often they are used as protection for weaker companies, or specialists who might not have the manpower or survival skills to complete their missions alone.

January 12th 199

He's got a high school diploma, and dropped out of college to join the military. He made it about 2 semesters.

Buck was born on a cattle ranch in rural Texas, and raised by a VERY Christian conservative family. Talking anti-vax, toeing the line of conspiracies, they do think the LQTBQIA+ community are all child groomers and they are pretty racist/anti-Semantic.
Buck grew up going to a private Catholic school with it's entire budget funneled into the sports teams and the chapel. Church every Sunday. Better confess your sins. Make em up if you have to, we need something to make you cry about and then claim we forgive you and then never let the subject drop again.
His family was always poor, and it was always the government's fault. His mother was a God-fearing severe woman who wasn't shy about corporal punishment, and his dad was an emotionally unavailable man who only ever expressed himself when he was pushed too far in anger. He had two sisters and three brothers. He was the middle child, two brothers and a sister younger than him, one brother and one sister older. He got along with the older ones and his youngest brother, but the others he didn't like very much. They were always trying to get the older kids in trouble with the parents and as they aged became more and more devoted to the good Lord in the most smug, snobbish way.
Buck always dedicated himself to the religion, and tried his best to be the son his parents wanted, but you can't please people like that, and as middle school hit and he began to realize something was a little different about himself, it only got harder to please them. It hadn't slipped past them that he still showed no interest in girls, and a few times he said things that were 'gay,' (they really weren't but his parents were quick to jump to suspicions), and punished him harshly for it. It wasn't anything horrifying, but essentially exaggeration of their current parenting, forcing him to get more involved in the church, threatening to 'send him away' to 'chase the demons out' (conversion therapy).

He grew up riding horses and breaking them the hard way, and wrangling cattle during the summer. He got to the point where not too many could tip him off, but by the time he was in high school, he was starting to outgrow most of the ranch ponies they had. When he hit high school, he joined the football team and did really well. For once his parents were proud of him, and that paired with his constant devotion to whatever Christian rhetoric they put down in front of them made them finally spend the money to buy him a nice draft/tb cross who admittedly wasn't very cowy, but got the job done. The horse's name was Moses, and was a big bay gelding.
By now Buck had a nice healthy dose of self-loathing, and even though by now his LGTBQIA friends had made it clear to him vicariously that he was 100% gay, he refused to show it, or accept it, thinking maybe, if he just tried hard enough, God would fix him.

Welp he got through high school like that, and went to the local community college for two semesters with no plan, no ideas for his future, and assuming he would spend the rest of his days on the ranch until his parents died and he and his siblings would take it over. That's when he figured out he could join the military, and in a very impulsive moment, dropped out of college and enlisted. For once, the military wasn't the worst possible option, and as he was moved far away from his family for boot camp, he finally began to be able to clear his head and dedicate himself to something he really felt had meaning and a purpose. So he dedicated all of himself to it, making friends, impressing the instructors, and when he graduated, it was with top honors. (His parents were VERY approving. They thought this was a wonderful turn of events. And with them finally pleased, he worked even harder to maintain that.)

It didn't take long for Company 18 to track him down and welcome him in. They were a specialized unit who were comprised of some of the best of the best, the best marksmen, the best trackers, the best survivors. As he continued to travel further and further away from Texas and his family, and made closer and closer friends with the crew, he started to talk a little bit about his childhood. Everyone was pretty horrified, and eventually convinced him that his parents were not healthy, and EVENTUALLY, convinced him to cut contact with them entirely.

After that, he really came into his own, content to serve in that company for the rest of his career or life. He maintains that he is Christian, though nowhere near the extent of worship his parents held. And the internalized homophobia still burns, keeping that last tiny flicker of self loathing from burning out entirely.
And sometimes it still hurts pretty bad.

Moses, big bay gelding. Spent his whole life confused why he was working cattle when he clearly supposed to be a hunter jumper.

Skeeter, small barn cat he played with as a kid. Skeeter may have been the size of adult Buck's hand, but he DEFINTLY killed a few coyotes in his day. How? We will never know. Built different. That cat was the quickest draw in his wild west, but eventually the outlaws caught up to him and he went missing one night after a lot of coyotes showed up at the barn. Father went out with his shotgun, but Skeeter was never seen again.

Indian, little red paint cowpony he grew up riding. That pony taught all the kids everything they needed to know about life, by bucking them off when they didn't do things right, yet still the safest ride on the ranch. He was surefooted, and took care of his rider. The only time they EVER came off is when he wanted them off. He was ratty, he was angry, and he bullied cows professionally, but the kids were riding him around by themselves before they could walk. The father called him a million dollar pony and he was. he lived to be forty five.

Mother:
Ada Foster - Buck really, really, really wanted to be close to his mother. Ada was an upright, strict, stern woman who aggressively upheld her family. She ruled the kids with an iron fist, but not always an unkind one. She wasn't shy about corporal punishment, but she also was very much the stability of the house. Everyone relied on her to keep them together emotionally, physically, everything else. She was fiercely devoted to motherhood, and ask any of her children they will say they have no doubt she loved them. This, of course, just makes it harder to deal with the abuse, and understand that she was an abusive mother who messed them all up as much as she held them together.
When Buck was a very young child, she was very warm and kind, in many ways an ideal parent. As he aged, chores and responsibilities began to come his way (4 years old, help clean up, 6 years old, do dusting in the house, etc). These weren't inherently bad, and he did them willingly, but as younger siblings piled onto that, she diverted that love and warmth onto the youngest child in the house, expecting her other kids to be functional and not need her, getting extremely irritated when they 'bothered' her with things. Older siblings were expected to help care for younger ones, and took on essentially full parenting responsibilities once the new baby came along. Buck never lost sight of his mother's initial love though, and always tried to do everything right for her. As he slowly began to realize there's no hate like Christian love, she was the one he found it hardest to cut ties with. To this day he still sometimes just wants her to be there and hold him or read him a passage, or smile at him, or to even just be there at all, even if it is with cold anger and impatience. He is and always will be a mama's boy.
Fun fact about Ada, she never got the colts to buck. Even if it was the first time anyone was riding them. Unlike her children who just expected to be taken to the rodeo every time they backed the young horses, Ada had this magical touch, and the two year olds never seemed to mind her riding them.

Father:
Brandon Foster - Buck was ALWAYS scared of his dad, and tried to stay out of his way whenever he could. The very rare times his father was vocally proud of him, it was a happiness that was hard to beat in any other way, and filled him with pride and a need to do whatever it took to keep that approval. Even so, he and all his siblings were more used to the yelling, and they did their best to explain it away as their father doing stressful things and needing them to help correctly. Like moving cattle, if someone didn't do their job right, 5,000 head of cattle would be very hard to regain control of. So if he yelled at them on a roundup, well, it wasn't that he was angry, just...needed things done the right way. Right now. Regardless, Buck always felt a certain kind of panic. His dad was hard to cut ties with as well, but Buck was old enough to know that the need for fatherly approval was a fruitless search, and he was better off without his father.
Brandon and Ada had a fairly cold relationship. They were basically an arranged marriage (more through pressure than any actual arrangement), and they simply saw it as their job to be married, handle the ranch, and keep the family going.

Siblings:
Joelle - Joelle is the oldest sibling, already 6 when Buck was born. Buck LOVES Joelle, but has next to no contact with her. Joelle was like a second mom to all the siblings growing up, she pretty much cared for the house, and took care of the older ones when they needed comfort. She was always very close with their mother, and that closeness stayed her entire life, though as she aged it turned from 'parent child,' to 'mother daughter team,' to 'mother vents to and is borderline codependent with an exhausted older child who carries the burden of all the family's trauma.'
Joelle and Buck were very close growing up, and only drifted apart because Buck cut contact with his parents. Joelle still lives with their parents, now with her own husband and child, who Buck has never met. It kinda tears him up that he probably will never get the chance to be an uncle.

Henley - Henley was 2 when Buck was born, and was Buck's best friend growing up. Sure, they fought a LOT, and most the injuries from their childhood came from each other, pushing each other off fences, daring each other to ride the wild two year old horses they got before they had been trained, wrestling all the time. But they were partners in crime, Henley a REAL trouble maker who thought stealing cookies from the hot oven was the best past time in the world. They had the most fun with each other, just being boys. Unfortunately the relationship did not survive past high school, Henley fell deep into the beliefs of their parents, always angry about the various conspiracies he believed. Buck couldn't comfortably maintain a relationship with his brother when Henley openly hated the LGTBQIA community. Like, hated them. Possibly more so than his parents. Henley was killed in a car accident when he was 22, after Buck had cut contact with his family. The news hit hard, but Buck was really only sad because Henley never got the chance to become the person he used to be again.

Simon and Laura - These two were born 4 and 5 years after Buck, and that age gap was never bridged. A lot of responsibility got shifted onto him very suddenly after Simon's birth, and when Laura was born, it didn't get any lighter. As they all aged, Laura and Simon were close to each other, Buck was close to Henley and Joelle. He found the younger ones pretty annoying. Both Simon and Laura were natural born people pleasers (tbf all of them were except maybe Henley), and they did everything asked of them, both growing up to be lil snitches who sometimes made things up just to get older siblings in trouble if there had been an argument. Both of them wrote Buck several times after he cut contact, and each letter was filled with guilt trips and stories about how hard the family was taking his 'betrayal,' and how if he came back the good Lord would forgive him and accept him back. He never wrote back.

Raiden - Raiden was born two years after Laura, and immediately imprinted on Buck specifically. Buck wasn't tired all the time like Joelle, wasn't too rough like Henley, and wasn't mean like Simon and Laura. Raiden wanted to do EVERYTHING with Buck, all the time, and Buck, while initially annoyed by the constant harassment from a small child, slowly, over the course of many years grew to be very protective and welcoming of Raiden. He taught Raiden how to ride, taught him how to barrel race, how to fish, how to shoot, and how to sit a bucking cow. By the time Buck was in high school, he never let Simon and Laura bully Raiden, and actively encouraged Raiden to hang out with him. Henley never loved that Raiden tagged along on all the adventures, but Buck refused to be argued with, and Raiden was a spunky lil shit who could hold his own. When Buckley joined the military, Raiden was only eleven, and when he cut contact with the family, Raiden was almost 13. It was the hardest tie to cut, so Buck didn't. He couldn't really explain to Raiden why he was doing it, and Raiden didn't understand at all. Being an angsty teen, Raiden gave Buck the cold shoulder for a long time, despite Buck's constant attempts to text him. Eventually Raiden started talking to him again, partially because he got over it partially because without Buck there to keep the brunt of the family's disfunction out of Raiden's sight, his younger brother was finally seeing for himself exactly how bad the family situation was. Raiden communicates regularly with Buck to this day, and is currently in boot camp, looking to follow Buck's footsteps and eventually catch up to him.
Raiden is an endless source of delight to Buck.

Other Family:
Like all good Western families, there was a plethora of extended family around the area. The aunts and uncles were all various versions of his mother and father with varying severity. Buck only knew one of his grandparents, for a very short time, and his mother's father was the stoniest, coldest, most evangelical man ever. He'd been a fire and brimstone preacher for his entire life, and really did not like children. Fortunately, he was not in the picture very long. His other grand parents were all dead before he was born. Cousins were fun and rowdy, or snooty and holier-than-thou. Buck was not close to any of his extended family.

It is, however, worth mentioning Aunt Annie. Aunt Annie lived on the property of Buck's parents. She was Ada's sister, and her house was about a mile or two away down the old dirt road between the 40 acre back pasture and the fields the neighbor rented to grow corn on. The family always went to visit her on Tuesday evenings, but otherwise they didn't interact very much. (Well, the kids didn't. Ada went down every day.)
Annie was a hoarder with a lot of other issues, and had to live with Buck's family because she couldn't live on her own, and none of the other family would take her. Ada did not have a good relationship with her sister, but fought for her health every step of the way. Buck grew up without thinking too much about the appalling state of Annie's house, he and his siblings used to crawl through the piles of junk as a game. They just stayed away from the piles of rotting trash and the paces they found mouse poop and other infestations. Buck's one memory of Annie that wasn't "oh, yeah, she was just there," was the time Ada got angry at Annie for not throwing out the trash like she promised she would. The two got into a fierce verbal altercation and Ada ended up physically dragging piles of things from Annie's house to the burn pit while Annie screamed at her and tried to stop her. That was pretty traumatizing for all of them, but Buck was probably eight or nine at the time and he didn't really realize the gravity of the situation. Annie passed away due to health complications not long after Buck started college, and to this day that house remains untouched, all her things just sitting there, rotting away until the house probably collapses some day.

Buck doesn't have any long lasting relationships before the army, so I won't talk about any of those. extensively as they have no bearing on his life now. He fell in with a pack of queer rejects in high school, but he was just the token straight friend (so they thought) and he never really got that close to them.

Current friendships are very important though, so lets talk about them.

Captain Gregory Hodge - The captain of Company Eighteen, Hodge is the closest thing Buck has to a father figure. Hodge scouted Buck into the company, personally vouched for him, and really has big dad vibes in general. He's an older captain, not as fit as he once was, bit of a dad bod. He's just missing the dad jokes. Hodge has adopted like 95% of his company. It never fails to impress the troops how he keeps all seventy of them straight in his head. He may call them the wrong name here and there, but that just adds to the fatherly vibe. (Hodge absolutely knows that they all call him dad behind his back, and absolutely calls them all son/daughter. No can tell if he's doing it on purpose or not. He is). He'll adopt you even if you don't want it, you're getting a third parent dammit there's nothing you can do.

Buck very quickly formed a deep loyalty to Hodge and the company, and all those soldiers would do anything their captain told them. They have absolute trust in him. It's well-earned. He's tough on them, but its very clearly from a place of 'I care about you.'

Yes he's been known to hug a soldier and just hold them and tell them its all gonna be okay
Yes it's damn therapeutic
Yes Buck is 'a soldier'

Captain Red - Captain of the company of fighter pilots that teams up with Company 18 for the book. Red, like Hodge, is on top of her team, and while she's much less of a parent to her people, she's deeply involved with them on a personnel level, and takes their training and skills very seriously. She and Buck have a few missions together, and he holds a lot of respect for her commanding power and decision making. She and Hodge are old friends, and since Buck is one of Hodge's favorite sons- I mean best soldiers, she knows who he is and takes care to check in on him when they cross paths.

Company 18: There's a lot of people in this circle, and somehow he's friends with nearly all of them. I will not be going into all 70 of them. Just no. Buck's not the main character and we spend almost no time with this crew on screen. They are there. He's very close with them. They're very fond of him. Thats all you really need to know.

and finally...

LANE BAYLEY MILLER
Lane is the first person to finally break through Buck's iron wall of 'I'm straight dammit.' He's one of Red's company, one of the best pilots in the army, like the rest of his team. They meet on day one of the joint mission, when Lane crashes straight into Buck and falls over on his lil butt and is super flustered bc he was running late and then just runs away again. Buck kinda fell in love right there, just a tiny bit. Lane's cute, anyone would.

They get assigned to work as a pair, and during an ambush, they are separated from the rest of the force. Thus begins the long road of slow-burn strangers to lovers where Lane helps him heal a lot of his traumas and accept himself. Can't go into it more, because that just...the book. Thats what the book is about.

He's drawn to Lane for a lot of reasons, but one of them really is Lane is just really adorable to him. Lane had a bunch of quirks that Buck just likes. For example Buck started trying to guess what song Lane had stuck in his head based on the tune Lane tapped on things randomly, and found out they have the same ish taste in music. Lane tucks his hands into whatever pockets he has and smiles a certain way when he actually is happy about something, and Buck was quick to notice that specific thing about him. Lane also ALWAYS laughs at Buck's jokes, and get them right away every time. Lane also is good with jokes, mostly stupid puns.
Lane flies under the radar, and Buck saw that not many people really knew him at all, and when he realized Lane liked it that way, he at first didn't try to make friends with Lane, trying to respect social boundaries, but Lane really went out of his way to make friends with him, and Buck realized how rare that friendship was, and lil heart just go melt. Lane also never judges him. Or is angry with him if he overacts about 'silly' things like physical affection.

He doesn't know that Lane is scared shitless of him at first, and Lane's philosophy is to face one's fears, and by face them, he means befriend them.

Lane shows him how to heal, and Buck realizes how much he wants to heal.

Anyway, them <3

ok ok a lot of this might be repeats but
Things Buck does that ~just make sense~ (if you’re a closeted homosexual)

Only likes physical contact if it’s a life or death situation, because he can justify pulling a homie out of harm's way, or picking a homie up, or shielding him under his arm, or laying on top of him, or holding his hand, or cradling him in his arms, or-

Does not care about these things with his sisters in arms. Is very casual around them, legit doesn’t think about it.

He exudes menacing, cold-hearted military vet, and isn’t socially awkward, but he’s just awkward. Not shy tho.

He’s very protective of his lil crew, but not in a “hey get away from him/her!” kinda way, more in a “stand right behind his friend and glare at you until you learn to take a hint” kinda way.

Hardly EVER goes to the gym or works out with friends, unless it’s the ladies, and he uses the “I’m the bodyguard” excuse for that one, not the “my bro’s arms make me feel a certain kinda way” excuse. (The ladies all know btw. They know. They know things about him he would never tell anyone. He didn’t tell them. They just Know.)

Doesn’t mind being touched as much as he minds touching. He will NOT punch your arm in a friendly manner. He will NOT pat your shoulder comfortingly. He MIGHT bump fists or high five. But if you do any of those things to him he won’t reaaallllyyy care, just not really reciprocate.

He likes being surrounded by his crew. He’s actually an extrovert.

He joined the military to escape the gay allegations dammit why isn’t this working!!

He’s really not outwardly homophobic or any sort of LQTBQ-phobic, it's all internal. He will avoid you a little if he learns you’re gay but uh…we all know why that is.

Wallflower, but like…big

Actually a gentle soul, and very kind.

He tries to be mean, and it…kinda works. If you don’t know him at all.

Great songs for him:
I Love You - Woodkid
Land of All - Woodkid
Choice - Jack Stauber
Far From Home - Five Finger Death Punch
Destroyer of All Things - Blue Stahli
Winter Hymnal - Fleet Foxes
Like,,, ALL of the Zaba album by Glass Animals
Mouthful of Razors - Memory of a Melody
Hayloft 1 and 2 - Mother Mother
Did someone say every Moody Blues song ever?

He vibes with Phonk music. It would play over cinematic clips of him. He listens to it.

Big Lizzo fan, mostly because of Lane

🎵There will be a soldier, who carries a mighty sword...🎵

him and lane as King and Lionheart I don't make the rules, ANYway-

Need a big boy, I want a big boy, gimme me a big boy🎶

He wears a silver cross necklace, and is meticulous bout keeping track of it, keeping it out of dirt or risk of breaking.

Some of Buck's personal favorite jokes: (He actually has a little twangy banjo sound effect saved to his phone he plays every once in a while at the punchline, just to keep it real and keep you on your toes.)

"I've seen a lot in my time with the military. I've survived mustard gas. I've been pepper sprayed."
"I guess you could say I'm a seasoned veteran."

"I used to be addicted to soap."
"I'm clean now."

What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?"
"Sofishticated."

"Two tall men walk into a bar. The short man walks under it."

Buck: Alright, we found the suspect, he's dancing naked down main street.
Hodge: Copy that.
Buck: Well, I'll try but I'm not much of a dancer

Dad jokes like the old "Did you get a haircut?" "No, I got them all cut." He usually pulls these out around Hodge. Hodge rarely gets them and Buck thinks that makes them way funnier because he gets all mad that everyone's laughing but him and he thinks somehow they're making fun of him, but he just can't figure out how. He has looked Hodge dead in the eyes when Hodge said "I'm hungry" and reply with "Hi Hungry."
(Even Hodge got that one)

Then there's the cowboy jokes. He has so. many. cowboy jokes.

"What does a ghost cowboy wear?"
"Boo-ts"

"Why did the cowboy want to buy a dachshund?"
"To git a long little doggie."

"How did the cowboy know his cattle were behind him without looking?"
"He herd them."

"I saw this new Western come out called The Sun. It’s set in the west."

And so on. These are just a few of his favorites.

Fluent in English and supposedly learned Spanish in Highschool but only remembers "Grazie" (which is Italian)

During a briefing:
Lane: Gets confused after the first 5 words, has to ask Buck to explain later
Buck: Not paying attention but somehow understands

Lane, trying to figure Buck out:
Lane: Any tips on how to make someone like me?
Buck: Try to make them laugh all the time.
Lane: Oh, wow! You actually help me for once, and it's even good advice!
Buck: Yeah, the more they laugh, the more time they spend with their eyes closed, so it'd be easier since they don't have to look at you.

Best served with a helping of "13 angels standing guard round the side of your bed" please give it a listen, specifically while reading this. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fN7udMAMog) This is the very first scene we have from Bucks POV, when the book switches out of Lane's POV. This is canonically right after Buck realizes he cannot deny his love for Lane any more.

The pathway was lined with bodies. All of them were his. All of them had silver crosses branded into them, on the hands, on the foreheads, on the backs, the silver glittering and burning like fire. Each moved weakly, some groaning, some sobbing quietly, some hissing long, slow breaths in and out through punctured lungs, slit throats. One cradled its hand, staring silently at the bones jutting through its palm, his fingers rigid bent backwards at a right angle, the cross sizzling on its palm. Something grabbed his leg, and he shook it off, looking in wonder at a caved in, bloody face that he couldn’t quite tell was his. The eyes glittered through the blood, dark and unaware as it crawled forward, groping for him. An odd bubbling gurgle came from the inverted nose, rhythmic, snorting. The cross swung from a white-hot chain around its neck, glowing and hissing as it melted into flesh.

A wind rattled the pale gold cottonwood leaves that clung to the dying trees, the rank scent of cows hitting him in the face like a punch. It drew his gaze up and forward, down the trail. Wooden posts marched down the road like strict guards, twin strands of barbed wire connecting each one. His bodies piled high past the fence, and far away, distant in a yellow haze of setting sun, an old farmhouse stood stark and black windowed, a burnt red barn looming over its right shoulder, an ancient silo over its left.

Buck didn’t want to go that way. He turned around, searching for an exit, but as he did, a soundless, echoing crack split the air and suddenly he was very tiny, the sky swooping both down and up at once as it opened like a void of purple grey clouds and golden, too-blue space that threatened to swallow him whole. The world widened, the fence ending as abruptly as the piles of bodies, and a field of knee-deep prairie grass and colorless ditch flowers stretched off into a horizon so distant he felt sure this world must be flat. He shrank back, the terrible beauty overwhelming any other feeling. He could not go that way.

He retreated back towards the farmhouse, suddenly desperate for its familiarity. He nearly fell as he turned, tripping over his own arms as they all reached for him at once, silently begging him to carry them with him to salvation. He shook them off, shuddering at their touch and the black marks their hands left on his skin. The farmhouse called him. It sang to him as he stumbled closer, words of praise slurring into meaningless sound as he fought his way forward. His bodies clung tighter and tighter, wailing after him as he ripped himself free again and again. The wide sky bore down after him, catching up to him, surely. It would steal him, it was going to steal him away and he could never come back. Weight built around his neck, and the cross necklace fell from his shirt, glinting in the light and dragging him towards the ground.

The cross forced him to fall as he reached the stairs. He landed hard on his hands and knees and kicked away the cold, vise-like hands and teeth that tried to bury into his legs. He realized he was sobbing, unsure when he’d started crying, but certain it was the sky’s fault. Above him the screen door loomed, solemn, pitch black, and empty beyond, promising shelter from the outside void. Even as he scrambled the last few paces across the porch, it swung open for him, devoid of the rusty creak he knew should be there. He crossed the threshold without hesitation, collapsing to the worn, warm hardwood as the cross’s weight became unbearable for one instant, then lifted entirely. At last he looked behind him, fighting to catch his breath against the dusty, warm air of the house.

Where before there had been a path, not there only sat the field of color bleached flowers and grass, entangling the fence, the trees, and the perfectly frozen bodies, now stiff and artificially still. Maybe lifeless. Maybe put in stasis for eternity. Through the door every color was tinged black, the shadows too deep yet all flat and disappointed. Waiting for him to come back so motion could resume and swallow him at last. Above this, the crosses floated in the sky like too-quiet stars. Watching him. Waiting for him to make a mistake.

Buck jerked his gaze away, as if by looking he could be tempted, as if looking was already wrong itself. The farmhouse was empty of furniture, silky dust coating the floor in a thick layer. The edges of the room stretched back out of sight, obscured by shadow. The room felt endless, save for the wall at the back, all brick fireplace and cracking, white painted plaster. He looked up towards the mantel above the empty fireplace with a kind of broken hope. It was the end of all this. It was salvation. It was protection, love, acceptance.

It was a cow’s skull, hung against the wall, staring at him with pitiless black sockets, and the singing stopped, silence echoing in its place as the voices stared at him in disgust through the skull, stripping every shred of pretense away from him and leaving bare the parts of him that were unworthy, unlovable, unacceptable. He reached out weakly, trying to form the words to plead, to promise he could change, he was good, he would repent, but the silent judgment hammered down on him until he curled into a ball trying to escape.

And they left him there for the sky and the colorless flowers and the tall grass to find someday after the now-sullied farmhouse crumbled away into nothing, ruined by the atrocity of his presence.

Violet: Goes by they/them. Violet's the mom-friend of the group, the one who can do paperwork, emotionally regulates the others, and sternly reprimands old white people. Violet is the ring leader of the group, and know how to do almost anything practical. They are short, thin, and have dyed white blonde hair cut in a long mohawk.

Budgie: Budgie goes by it/its pronouns, and it's only goal in life is to become a feral raccoon and live in the woods. It has a never-ending well-spring on rage in it's heart, and yells at old white people. Prone to wordless screeching in the face of bigotry, will just make unholy noises until the offender is too disturbed to talk anymore. It has rainbow hair cut in a forever too-long and sloppy fade.

Artemis: Goes by he/she/they, Artemis is a caretaker first and foremost. Don't ask him about her emotions. They will never tell you, but they find therapy in helping you with your struggles. She is quiet, but does whatever the hell he wants, and fears no repercussion. They have black, tightly curled hair that they wear down to their knees

No spoilers, but after Buck is medically discharge from the military, he's left without any connections. Raiden is still in service, and he's deployed so there's no contact there, and the rest of his army buddies are in the same position. Buck manages to find an apartment he can afford, and moves in. Lucky for him, the apartment right below his is home to three rebellious teens who immediately adopt him and make it their business to take care of him. They are filled queer rage, and aggressively include him in their lives. It's a little harder for him to get around now, and they are always making sure they can help him do the harder things in life, like carry things to the fifth floor where he lives. (Yes there's an elevator. Yes they still insist on carrying stuff for him. It's the principle of the matter). They have all been rejected, abandoned, and lonely in life, and they're not about to let anyone else go through that. He never asked for their friendship, but they didn't leave him any choice, and hey. They're good kids. They need some sort of adult role model in their life, and he can at least try to be that.