(I don't think we had Beck as the new kid last time? plus he's lived with the altairs for 4-5 years now so it's not like he would be new to school bc he just moved in with them? Plus his older siblings are fairly well-known in the school bc I decided they are skfbjfdg (Rowan is one of the star basketball players and has burn scars on his left arm, shoulder, and cheek, and Rowan's twin Lilly is trans and part of the school newspaper as photographer + editor, along with being part of the art club. I also am far too attached to them dskbgkjdfb) so? i feel like new kid doesn't work? i mean i could probably make it work if you really want to do that lol)
(oooooo nono i actually like that much better!! i can't remember if he was the new kid last time, but i am probably wrong because i have a terrible memory lmfao so!! no new kid stuff, but maybe we could have them meet in the infirmary cause imma have Kohen go there after my first response- or they could get paired in an assignment in the class they share together and that's how they meet? i would have kohen be completely oblivious to the fact that Beck is gay for the first few replies just so he doesn't hate him right off the bat and they can talk on the same level without Kohen ignoring him, but once he finds out that Beck is gay he'll start to target him, is that okay? we could also do a combination of both if you would like)
(alright! yeah that works! i like it!)
(cool beans! i'll get a starter up ina sec!)
Kohen swung back, hitting him across the face with his fist, the man was three times his size. Usually, he didn't like fighting his father like this, but his prized possessions were in danger of being taken away and thrown in the trash. They were….stuffed animals. Kohen liked collecting stuffed animals because they reminded him of his mother who would buy them for him when he was a kid and afraid to sleep alone at night.
Kohen didn't think it would be a problem if he hid them in a box, and pushed them back into his closet behind his laundry basket, but last night he had an especially tough time dealing with everything that he had brought them all out and slept with them. Kohen's father never went into Kohen's room, he didn't care to, but Kohen hadn't woken up that morning to go to school, having not slept all night.
He slept in his normal clothes instead of a pajama because his father was unpredictable and there was no knowing when he would pull something like this. When his father became violent Kohen had to get out fast and being out in the streets with his sleeping clothes on was not the best thing.
Kohen cringed at his father who calmly looked at Kohen after getting hit. He quietly left the room and instead of making Kohen feel relieved, he panicked, looking around frantically. He quickly went over to his drawer and dug around, shoving his clothes to the side before he found a small wooden box. He grabbed it and bolted out the room, downstairs.
Soon, his father appeared with a metal bat. Kohen was in the middle of grabbing his book bag when he saw him with the weapon. He froze. Seeing the man come down with the bat ready to swing, made Kohen stumble back, his body screaming to get out. This happened time and time again, but for some reason, Kohen found it hard to control his movements every time, caught between staying put, a freeze response, and wanting to run, a flight response. Before Kohen could do anything more, he saw the bat ready to make contact with his head. From this angle he couldn't dodge, so he did the next best thing, he blocked it with his wrist which made a crack-ing sound. Kohen's eyes teared up, hissing at the pain.
-
Kohen stared at the empty locker, spacing out, then slowly coming out of it as he felt the throbbing sensation of his wrist. He could have chosen to skip school, but he didn't. Even if he had a good excuse, no one knew about his situation and he was not about to open his mouth and spill his secrets only to get put into a home for his remaining year as a young adult. He could take it, it was only one more year. He wasn't sure what he would do or where he would go once he hit eighteen but he'd figure it out.
Beck had awoken for school at the same time he always did, and had rolled out of bed and gotten dressed. As usual, he was dressed in long sleeves and jeans; he didn't wear t-shirts frequently, since the chances of the scarring on his arms being visible was too high. And he knew that the scars weren't something he had to hide; Lilly and Rowan didn't hide their burns, which they too had recieved at the hands of abusive bio parents, but Beck could never bring himself to let anyone see the burns and scars that hid beneath his clothing. Rowan's burns had been given while he was protecting Lilly, so Lilly's burns were smaller than her brother's. She had burns along the side of her left leg, and some on her left forearm, whereas Rowan had burns along his entire left arm, shoulders, and even on his face. He had gotten made fun of quite a lot for it, but he was a physically intimidating enough person now that most didn't say anything about it.
Breakfast was, as usual, a rather noisy affair. With five kids and two adults, it was bound to be loud. But it was also quick, and then Lilly and Beck were getting into Lilly's car. Rowan had left earlier, since there was some basketball practice before school that he usually went to. It was optional, but since Rowan was on the varsity team he almost always went. Therefore, Lilly drove herself and Beck to school most days. Lilly was tall, with long blond hair and brown eyes. She and Rowan had never been identical twins, as Rowan had dark hair and hers had always been blond, but they certainly looked very similar side by side. Beck got carsick sometiems, so he usually spent most drives looking out the windows while the radio played music of Lilly's choice.
Once they reached school, Beck headed for the nurse's office. He had medication he had to take at lunch-time, but due to school policy he had to turn it in to the nurse. He couldn't just keep it with him. So, every morning, he went to the nurse's office in order to hand over his medication, and then after school he went back to retrieve it again. It was a pain in the ass, but since it wasn't emergency medication that he had to have on him, he couldn't keep it on him. The one time he had, a teacher had seen the pill bottle in his backpack and he had gotten into trouble. So now he made sure to turn it in, even though it was a pain.
It hurt. Like a motherfucker. The bruises and wounds always did.
Kohen was a frequent visitor to the nurse's office and the guy knew him by name at this point. He stuck his head inside, looking to see if it was empty, and it was. Mr. Hunt wasn't in yet, usually coming in later than the rest of the teachers, even students, though he left it unlocked just for Kohen, knowing his situation. Well, not quite. He thought Kohen was a reckless kid that got himself hurt all the time. His father was never mentioned and if his father was brought up at some point he dodged the questions like bullets.
Kohen flipped the switch and the lights slowly flickered on. Damn the place was old.
He sighed as he looked around, going over to the cabinet that held all the bandages. He looked down at his wrist which was starting to turn blue and purple, the swelling starting to be visible.
An actual doctor would be great with the amount of pain he was in, but maybe just wrapping it up, for the time being, was enough for now. Kohen had no idea how in the hell he was going to manage the school day because he had damaged his right hand which he used to write with.
Kohen grabbed a white bandage, slowly wrapping his wrist. He wasn't sure if he should tighten it since he was pretty sure it was fractured. He had broken bones plenty of times, but he wasn't one to take of them, a friend of a friends usually did that but she was in class right now and he couldn't bother her.
He stared at the loose bandage on his wrist. It looked….sloppy. What even was the point?! He might as well take the bandage off and go on about his day like that. He would take his chances with the pain. Maybe some painkillers would do him some good….
Kohen looked over at the cabinet full of pills for different types of things. Only problem was that he didn't have the key for the darn thing. And this was a good thing, considering that Kohen would most likely take a large amount without measuring the consequences.
Beck arrived at the nurse's office, though he pasued for a moment when he saw the light on. He usually just left his medication on the counter, so that Mr Hunt could lock it in the cabinet when he arrived at the school. But if someone else was in there, Beck couldn't do that. Not when his medication was technically a controlled substance and should not be left in the open without anyone else in the room. That was a lawsuit waiting to happen. He slowly came into the room, clearing his throat faintly so that he wouldn't startle the person inside. His medicaiton was still in his bag, not in view.
The young man's gaze fell on Kohen, and he cocked his head very faintly. "Are you alright?" he asked, setting his backpack down by the door. Beck looked very small; he didn't look like a freshman, to be sure, but he just looked…small. Harmless. The forest green sweater he wore was just a little larger than the proper size, though it looked extremely comfortable at the same time. His backpack had an assortment of pins on it, including a few pride ones, but with the way he had set it down, none of the pins would be visible to Kohen from that angle.
Beck fidgeted with the hem of his sleeves very faintly, keeping his gaze on Kohen for only a moment before his eyes were moving again, searching the room. He had a hard time with eye contact sometimes, especially with strangers; too many adults when he was younger had drilled eye contact into his head, and it frightened him now. Especially when adults insisted on eye contact. He tugged on his sleeves very slightly, though it was more of an absent, anxious gesture than anything else. He was wearing a tank top underneath the sweater; just in case he had to take the sweater off for some reason, there would still be a layer. The idea of anyone seeing those scars was a terrifying one that, frankly, he never wanted to deal with.
Kohen stopped struggling with the bandage when he heard someone behind him. Oh great.
He stood there for a second, thinking about what to do. He could leave without saying anything, but he really needed some painkillers and was planning to wait for Mr.Hunt to arrive, no matter how long it took. Maybe he would also know what to do with his wrist…or so he was hoping.
Kohen took in a deep breath before turning around to see who the hell was in the nurse's office at this hour- like he was one to talk. He looked over at the kid, who was much smaller than he was. Curiosity got the better of Kohen and he wondered who this kid was and why he hadn't noticed him earlier. Was he new? Or had he always gone to this school? Surely, he had to be new, he would have caught Kohen's eye much sooner…
A familiar feeling settled in his chest as he watched the kid look around, not being able to make eye contact with him. He scoffed, yeah, of course. The feeling was a disgusting one, not towards the boy, but towards himself. He couldn't get caught up in whatever he was feeling so he shoved it down and straightened himself out.
Kohen lifted his arm showing the boy his broken wrist, which by this point was much more visibly swollen. The purple started to spread down his arm, but just slightly.
"Was being an idiot" Kohen muttered, looking at it, then moving his arm by his side again, the white bandage still in his other hand. He looked back at the boy, staring at his sweater. He loved stuff like that, especially for the winter, but his father thought it looked too 'girly', whatever that meant. It was just clothes.
"I think it might be broken but…" Kohen looked away. No, it was definitely broken.
"I don't know what to do with it so I came to the office hoping to find some pain meds or something, but uhhh" He pointed to the glass cabinet. "They're locked- with good reason I suppose," He said shyly, knowing that people like him were the reason why they had to lock it in the first place.
"I also tried to wrap it, but it's difficult with just one hand and it hurts a lot so maybe wrapping it isn't a good idea" He trailed off, noticing he was talking too much. Something he only did when either, A: he was alone with someone else, or B: he found it hard to control his emotions, which was definitely happening right now.
"Doesn't matter" He rolled his eyes, scolding himself for oversharing. "What about you? Got a broken bone too?" He mused, knowing that wasn't the case. "If you're hurt I could try and help you, I pretty much live here and know where things are" He cracked another joke. Though it was less of a joke when you knew the real reason why.
His gaze flicked to the wrist that Kohen lifted, grimacing very faintly at the sight of the bruise, then looking over at Kohen's face again. "I can, ah, wrap it for you, if you like. And no, I don't have a, uhm, broken bone." he shuffled faintly, gaze flicking to his bag. "I have to, uhm…I turn in my medication at the start of the day." his eyes slid around the room, only occasionally darting to look at Kohen before he looked away again. "So, that's why I'm here."
He hoped Kohen wouldn't try and take his medication. Sure, it wasn't exactly the kind you took recreationally, but you could probably still sell it. If you really wanted to. He didn't know, though. He'd never tried. Probably never would, honestly. He needed his medication. Why would he sell it? He cleared his throat quietly, looking over at Kohen agian, eyes moving to that wrist. "Do you want me to try wrapping it? Mr Hunt doesn't usually come in until about the middle of first period, I think, and class is going to start soon." he really didn't want to leave his medication here with this kid that he didn't know. It just didn't seem like the smartest thing to do, and he didn't want his medication stolen.
Kohen seemed amused at someone wanting to help him. Usually, he was labeled as the school bully, sure, no one knew why, only the people he targeted knew, but he was still avoided at all costs. He had never received help from anyone else who weren't his friends, the people who seemed to tolerate him more than most. Even the teachers had enough of his troublesome behavior, sometimes sending him to the principal where Kohen would literally beg for his life for them not to call his father. He found it hard to contain his emotions. There was a tight lid on the jar, preventing him from completely snapping, but from time to time it would crack and he'd lash out unexpectedly.
Kohen shrugged, a slight smile on his face.
"Only if you want. You seem nice enough" He said, listening to Beck's next words. Kohen seemed to study the poor boy and the way he looked so afraid of everything- or was it paranoid? Not just because of Kohen himself, but more like something would come out and get him. He shifted his weight from one leg to the other, narrowing his eyes at Beck.
"Why do you act like that?" He asked, ignoring the reason Beck gave as to why he was there. "You talk like you're scared of something, nervous even" The more you acted like a frightened animal, the more likely you were to get targeted and Kohen seemed to pick on the weaker students.
"Is it because you've heard stuff about me?" He asked, wondering if his reputation had finally spread around the school. Despite people knowing who he was, there was still a handful who were completely oblivious to what he did. He took a few steps towards Beck, looking at him with an expression like he was going to do something, but he stopped, only a few inches away from him. He offered the white bandage wrap to Beck.
"Here," He said while also extending his broken hand, palm faced up. "If you wrap it too tightly I'll kill you" He warned, only half joking, but also not wanting for it to hurt more than it already did.
Beck's gaze flicked to Kohen at the questions, and he blinked at the taller boy. "It, uh, has nothing to do with you." he replied, taking a step over and taking the bandage wrap. "Can you sit down, though? It would be easier for me that way." he took a deep breath, trying to think of how to respond to Kohen's questions. "As for, uhm…your other question, I have anxiety. And, stuff." he cleared his throat, not adding on that he had PTSD. Kohen didn't need to know that, and he didn't want to have to get into why he had PTSD. How a 16 year old had PTSD as bad as he did.
He kept his gaze on the bandage wrap, his touch gentle as he got to work wrapping it around Kohen's wrist. He didn't wrap it too tight, but wrapped enough for it to compress and steady the other boy's wrist. "It's…pretty bruised, you should probably see a doctor or something." he said in a quiet tone, kepeing his gaze on the bandage he was working on. "Mr Hunt would probably say the same thing."
Kohen did as he was told and looked around to find a seat, before taking the one at Mr. Hunt's desk.
"Anxiety and stuff…?" Kohen repeated as Beck wrapped his hand, the gentleness of his nature made Kohen flush red, even though he had been the one to ask him to not be too rough. Still, he found that a soft touch like that was not something he could handle.
"Why do you have anxiety? Does school make you nervous?" He asked, trying to distract himself. Kohen was familiar with mental health, but not enough to know why one would have it. He knew about depression and anxiety, the two common ones they always seemed to talk about, he just couldn't figure out why something like that would come about.
When the topic of his hand came up again he scowled. The kid had been a good distraction from his pain, but now he was aware of it again.
"If I saw a doctor they would ask a bunch of unnecessary questions. Like, where did you get that? A fall? No amount of fall would cause this much damage" Kohen complained, then grew quiet.
"Ever have a secret you absolutely can't tell anyone? But it hurts you a lot?" He asked, starting to question if his decision was a good one, to keep quiet and all. He didn't have a therapist or anything, his father would kill him if he found out he was seeing someone and telling them about their private life. Then again, therapists cost money, something he didn't have a lot of.
It didn't help that his father didn't believe in mental health, either you were possessed by a demon or you were making it up and it was all in your head. Kohen had come to accept that, taking it as fact. Mental health didn't really exist, it was just weak people making excuses for every little thing…..
but for some reason, it felt wrong. Why did something like that feel so real then? He brushed it off, not wanting to continue the thought.
As Beck kept his eyes trained on the bandage Kohen stared at him, seeing if he would look at him. He was so….unusual. Quiet, without Kohen having to do anything.
"Your voice is nice" Kohen commented as he finished up. "You don't talk too loud, it's soft." Kohen gave him a smile, something people saw rarely.
With that, the bell rang, and Kohen looked up.
"That's our cue," He said getting up. "Where are you going? I can walk with you" He offered, taking a liking to the kid.
"Oh!" He paused. "What's your name? I didn't ask, mine's Kohen" He said, the bubbly side of him coming out just slightly. In reality, Kohen was just waiting for the chance to be himself, something he couldn't be around his friends. He thought that if this kid was shy and soft-spoken enough he wouldn't tell anyone about how Kohen was actually a friendly person. He didn't want his reputation ruined, but also didn't want to keep it up. His reputation was something there to protect him in a sense. If that was gone, he'd probably go back to the one being picked on. He couldn't have that.
"I just, uhm, school does not cause my anxiety." he said slowly, eventually finishing with the wrapping, just in time for the bell to ring. He didn't answer Kohen's question about secrets. Beck had…so many. Too many. All bottled up inside because they hurt so much and how could he let someone else carry that burden? How could he tell someone else about all that pain? The only one he had told was his therapist and even then, he hadn't told her everything. He couldn't. She knew it, too, he could tell, but he just couldn't bring himself to tell her everything. Couldn't bring himself to tell her those things, even though she was a therapist, she was trained for this.
He shook his head faintly to push away his thoughts. "Thanks, I…I guess." he hadn't really thought about his voice, generally, but it was a nice compliment nontheless. His cheeks flushed very faintly at Kohen's smile, and he fidgeted with his sleeves again, gaze flicking around the room. "My name's Beckham. You can just call me Beck, if you want." he said, offering up a faint smile of his own and picking his backpack up. He would just have to bring his medication during a passing period, then. He didn't want to be too late for class. "And my next class is, ah, Physics. With Mrs Bruen." he didn't really like science, but it was a required subject. He wasn't doing amazing, but he wasn't failing it, either, which he considered an accomplishment in itself.
(Bump? Everything alright?)
(yes, i'm sorry, i'm having problems with my meds right now and i'm in the middle of getting that sorted out. i will uhhh resume this in a bit, i've just not had the best few days)
Kohen's eyes lingered on Beckham's face as he smiled, his eyes going to Beckham's to make eye contact. It was something Kohen had been taught to do and reinforced when he didn't. Especially when he went to church, if his father found that he wasn't looking at people properly he would have a talk with Kohen and he liked to avoid those because then Kohen would say some dumb shit, and a fight would break out.
"Well Beck, it is very nice to meet you," He said confidently, looking away finally. He picked up his backpack and lead Beck out of the room and down the hallway.
Kohen's eyes widened when Beck mentioned Mrs. Bruen.
"You're telling me, we're in the same class together? And for some odd reason, I did not know that?" He said a bit confused himself. It was one thing if Beck was around the school and didn't attend any of the classes Kohen did, it would explain why he hadn't noticed him before, but he was in the same class as him. How had he missed that?
"You must be very quiet then. I like quiet people, they can keep secrets" He said hinting at the fact that the quiet ones usually never said anything, even if they were being picked on.
As he walked he stole glances at Beck, something he did when he liked someone but tried not to show it. There was a slight bounce to his step as he thought of another topic to talk about.
"Sooooo, do you have any friends?" Kohen asked finally, silently hoping that he didn't. It was cruel to think that way, hoping that someone is lonely. But Kohen found that it was easier to get close to someone if they didn't have anyone. At least for him, he got incredibly flustered with others around that he didn't know.
"If you don't, then maybe I could be your friend?" He asked though it was odd since he never really asked anyone to be his friend, ever. The friends he already had asked him to be friends, not the other way around. It's how Kohen found himself in the small group. If it weren't for them, he'd be alone most of the time.
"You seem like you'd make a good friend" Kohen muttered, mostly to himself.
In reality, Kohen wanted to be all over Beck, ask him a ton of questions, and yap about pointless things. But Kohen had learned to keep his excitement to himself and act like he hadn't consumed too much sugar. Why he was excited was beyond him. He just seemed to like the quiet boy right off the bat. He was the complete opposite of him and it intrigued him. Kohen had come across a lot of shy ones that kept to themselves, but they always avoided him. He didn't know why.
Well.
He did know why, it's because he was terrible but it's not like he was targetting the quiet ones specifically, just the ones that went against his beliefs.
(It's fine! Take your time, I just wanted to make sure everything was alright!)
Beck slung his backpack onto his shoulder, following Kohen out the door and into the hallway. "I have some friends, yes." not many, sure, but he had a few. He was closest to his siblings, to Lilly and Rowan, but he had a few friends here at school. It was hard to make friends, though, when he was so frightened to let people in. When the idea of anyone knowing about what his father had done made him want to scream and cry and throw-up all at once. It was too frightening, too horrific of an idea. What would they think, if they knew what had happened to him?
Sure, logically he knew that it was not his fault, that he had done nothing to deserve such horrendous treatment. But it had still happened. And the ones he knew that barely accepted the fact that he was gay, what things would they say if they knew about his past? That somehow, he could still be attracted to men after what adult men had done to him? No. They would probably sneer and say well of course he was gay. Of course. How could he not be, after that? And it was an idea that terrified him because what if it was the truth? What if the reason he was gay was because he had had no chance to be otherwise? That the sexual abuse had "trained" him into it, somehow. That his whole being was twisted and unnatural, through and through.
He pulled himself from his thoughts with a deep breath, glancing over at Kohen with a faint, shy smile. "You, uhm, can be my friend if you like." he laughed a little, the request and the reply reminding him of being on the playground at six years old, shyly asking a kid if they would be his friend. That was what it felt like. An elementary school question, with an elementary school answer, spoken in the hallways of a high school.
(i would like to profusely apologize for my disappearance. had a bit of trouble in my house these past few weeks and needed some time to process what I'm going to do next. i will reply to this as soon as i can hopefully you're not pissed at me, wouldn't blame ya though. it's still gonna be a little choppy and i would like to apologize for that as well. if you feel like this isn't worth your time feel free to tell me, i won't mind)
(it's alright! Are you okay? I am not pissed, it's fine :) Bro you're totally fine, take all the time you need, and I'm here if you need someone to talk to <3)
(yeah! i'm a little better now, still stressed with things going on, but we'll get through it haha and that's a relief, sorry for the wait, it was a long one, i didn't expect things to take this much time. and thankssss, i'll keep ya in mind if i ever need to talk to someone, it means a lot <3)
Kohen's eyes danced around as he took in Beck's face again, a giant smile on his face now.
"Great!" Kohen's voice went a little higher than it normally was. "Because I wasn't going to take no for an answer" He nudged Beck gently, trying to create friendly banter, the smile still plastered on his face, only slightly flushed, trying to keep it together.
Even though it was just a joke, Kohen really wasn't going to take no for an answer. He always had it his way and when it came to friends that was no exception. Course, he wouldn't have immediately taken the violent route, he would have pursued him like a lover did to their crush, trying to impress, only to fail miserably. It wasn't his style at all, but Kohen found he couldn't hold himself back when it came to someone who caught his eye.
At this point, Kohen didn't know what else to say so they walked in silence. The class wasn't too far, it was on the first floor near the back where the exits were. Mrs. Bruen was a nice teacher to everyone.
…
Everyone except Kohen and his friends. She had tried to form a relationship with Kohen prior as his teacher, giving out advice the best she could. Kohen had really felt a connection with her, almost like a parent.
Kohen had really liked her at one point, she had helped him out a lot, not a lot of people did that for him. The only reason they weren't so close anymore was because of one incident resulting in a kid having to be rushed to the hospital. Mrs. Bruen had given him a chance, and it had been right there. He had been so close to leading a normal high school life, but it seemed as if Kohen destroyed any potential help he received. He wasn't…easy to deal with. You had to try again and again.
After the incident he had been yanked out of school for suspension, it was a surprise he wasn't expelled after that. The next day Kohen had been absent, and that went on for weeks. And when he returned? All of the progress that was made had been burned to the ground.
Some speculated that the parent of the injured kid put a restraining order on Kohen, and took him to court, but it was nothing of the sort. It had little to do with what happened, and a lot more to do with his father and his expectations.
(yeah! i'm a little better now, still stressed with things going on, but we'll get through it haha and that's a relief, sorry for the wait, it was a long one, i didn't expect things to take this much time. and thankssss, i'll keep ya in mind if i ever need to talk to someone, it means a lot <3)
(Alright! Sorry for my wait this time lol, I've been busy with classes and work. Alright! Fair warning, I'm not the greatest at comforting (my ability to comfort amounts to Zuko in ATLA, ie "that's rough, buddy" lmao) but I will do my best to at least be a listening ear)
Beck let out a faint exhale of a laugh, shaking his head just a little at Kohen's words. He knew the young man was joking, but it still was a…loaded combination of words. Ones he had heard before, in various contexts. Most of them never good. He cleared his throat faintly, tugging on his sweater sleeves again in another quick, nervous gesture. He wished sometimes htat he was less like he was, more like someone else. He was not the only kid the Altairs had taken in that had been abused. Rowan and Lilly's biological parents had tried to burn them alive when they were younger, which was why both twins bore burn scars now, Lilly on her left leg and hip, and Rowan on his left arm, shoulder, cheek, and torso. He had thrown himself in front of Lilly to shield her, and had taken the brunt of the flames. Despite that, both twins were thriving. Rowan was the star of the basketball team and Lilly was one of the editors of the school newspaper. Everyone knew them. Everyone liked them. Even people who didn't like that Lilly was trans still thought she was a nice person, even if they sneered at her for something she couldn't help.
But he melted into the background. He could barely hold a conversation without stammering or looking away or shrinking into himself, so afraid to let someone in that he had alienated himself from almost everyone. Most of the kids at the school wouldn't have known who he was if someone asked if they knew him. He took a deep breath, cleared his throat, and did his best to refocus. His therapist had said that it was easy to let your thoughts spiral, but harder to pull them out, so the quicker you tried to the easier it would be to refocus. So he did his best never to let himself spiral for too long, though it was easier when he had a distraction.
A distraction like Kohen, who was walking next to him. Beck had known they were in the same class, but only vaguely. Kohen was usually across the room from him, and they had never interacted before. Why would they have? Beck didn't go out of his way to talk to people, and he didn't think Kohen did either.
Once they both had entered the classroom, the class, teacher included, looked up from the sheets of paper they were reading. They were taking a quiz. The class had just begun and they were taking a mini quiz. Great. Kohen sighed in an annoyed manner.
The teacher stared at both Beck and Kohen, hands on her hips as she held the papers in the same hand. She knew the reason why Beck was late, but Kohen had no excuse.
"What happened this time? Why are you late?" Mrs. Bruen called Kohen out. "You can sit down Beck." She said right afterward, her attention still on Kohen, a disappointed look on her face.
"Oh you know, I was out smoking to get the anxiety out of my system," He said in a mocking tone. The class was quiet, but some looked at each other and others snickered.
Mrs. Bruen did not like that one bit.
"Go sit down. I'll have a word with you later. And since you two are late, unfortunately, you two will have to pair up and do the next assignment together. We already picked partners, so this is final. Sit with Beck." She said as she went back to reading the sheet of paper, then scribbled something on it in pen.
Kohen would have made a scene had he been paired with someone he didn't like, but since it was Beck, he didn't see this as an annoyance, but as a chance to get to know him a little more. He went to sit beside Beck, making the person who sat beside Beck move. They begrudgingly got out of their seat and moved over one. He put his backpack down and rummaged through it before he found a broken pencil, the eraser gone.
Soon the teacher came over to give both Beck and Kohen the quiz. Everyone was mostly done with theirs, so they waited patiently till the teacher said anything else.
Kohen looked over the sheet and began answering the questions, scribbling in his poor handwriting, it was sloppy and he could definitely write better but he was too lazy to try, that and it hurt to move his wrist. Once he was done, he got up and turned in his sheet. It hadn't taken him long since he studied a lot. Not something you would expect from him, but with nothing but time on his hands, he resorted to studying and reading books that were interesting to him. He only aced the classes he liked and failed the others miserably, he just found no motivation to do those.
It wasn't long before they were all doing their respective assignments, the murmurs of others filling the air, some louder than others. Kohen looked over at Beck, wondering if he would have liked to have a friend as his work partner instead of Kohen. But!! Technically Kohen was his friend, so that was okay, right? Even though that was his thought process, it still felt like he was annoying Beck. He tended to do that a lot.
"Got any ideas on what we should do our presentation on?" He asked Beck casually, thinking about the math that would be involved. "How about equations and how to solve them? Like velocity and acceleration?" He said, looking at the board and their options. Some ideas were already taken, but usually, the ones Kohen was interested in were left last.
(that's no worries! i think imma be a little busy from now on so you don't have to worry about answering anytime soon, as long as you answer i'm a-okay with you answering whenever :>)
(XD that's alright, usually, i just need someone to hear me out, so it's all good cause i feel you on that, sometimes i can be like that too!)
(alright! Sorry again for the long wait tho lmao)
(alright, cool)
Beck didn't mind too much that Kohen had been put next to him. He pulled out a pencil and started working on the quiz when Mrs Bruen handed it to him, his own handwriting neat and precise, written carefully. He did doodle, though, while reading through the questions, pencil moving over the paper and leaving little faces and clouds behind, small little nonsense bits and pieces of disconnected images. Nothing concrete, nothing too practiced, just the easy, cute little doodles of an artist preoccupied with something else.
When Kohen spoke, he glanced up, blinking as he tried to find what to say. "Oh. I…I'm not very good at math." he finally said slowly. "So…I'm not going to be the most helpful with any of this." he could put together the presentation, sure, but his math skills were…shaky, at best. He was lucky he wasn't in remedial math classes, with how badly his scores had suffered when he was still with his bio father. He was lucky he had passed his grades, really.
"I don't really have any preferences for, ah, what we do." he ducked his head, setting his quiz aside and looking down at the table for a moment, then grabbing out his notebook and opening it up to a blank page, writing "Math partner assignment" at the top, then a bullet point. He didn't write anything else, though, waiting to see what they would decide first.
(you're all good :> also, I love Beck so much oh my god, his silly little doodles, i love him!! :0)
Since Kohen had finished before Beck, he would glance over at Beck answering his questions from time to time, wondering why he drew on his paper but found it charming. Maybe he was an art student? That would certainly be interesting. Kohen raised an eyebrow at the thought but kept it to himself.
When Beck said something along the lines of not being good at math, he perked up. This was his chance. His chance to impress. He wasn't sure how impressive algebra-based physics would be though. Kohen found it interesting for whatever reason, but most when talked to about it let out a huff, bored out of their minds.
"That's okay! I can do most of it, you can uhh, put it together? Oh! I know! You can write it down- well, I'll write it down first, then you can write it in your handwriting since it's….better than mine." He admitted frowning but decided to go with it.
"I'll do the mathy parts, you can do the research?" Kohen asked, wondering if Beck would be okay with that, though something told him he would, or well, he hoped. They just needed to reference the book they had been given, while also doing a little bit of research on the web.
At the last bit, Beck said, it made Kohen's eyes light up. This was perfect! Out of the last few that were left, he'd choose the one he felt he could do. Had he been paired with anyone else, they would have wanted to do the easier one, but sometimes that would be boring for Kohen and he would not engage at all, leaving the whole presentation to the other person. He wouldn't get credit on it, but somehow he always managed to do the tiniest bit so he could get at least something of a grade.
"Okay, so we'll do chapter 10 page 140, Displacement, Velocity, and Acceleration." Kohen started as he took both his book and computer out.
"I'll say the equations we'll use, you write them down, then we'll switch and you write down some of the information here" Kohen pointed to a paragraph in the book.
"And I'll do the equations and apply them to the scenarios I'll look up on the internet," He said, now sounding a little distracted as he looked something up on the computer.
"Teachers never really ask you to memorize this stuff, so just paraphrase it and we'll be good to go," Kohen said, sounding so confident in himself. He knew that sometimes teachers did call for you to memorize the information provided but knowing Mrs. Bruen, that probably wasn't going to happen.
(:D thanks!)
He got out his book, opening to the page that Kohen had said. "I can do the research." he agreed softly, giving Kohen a soft, faint smile. Kohen sounded excited about this, which was certainly interesting. He hadn't really pegged Kohen as a math lover, but maybe he had been wrong. That was fine. He wrote down some bits and pieces of information about the things that they had decided to research, doing his best to write some notes down. "So, uhm, what exactly are we doing?" he asked slowly, doodling again in the margins of his notebook as he looked over at Kohen, red hair falling into his face just a little bit. He looked soft and tired, in all honesty. Like he hadn't slept well. But he looked comfortable, too. Relaxed. "Are we supposed to do a slideshow, or just the presentation?" he had missed or forgotten that bit, really, but figured Kohen would probably know what they were supposed to be doing.
"We are-" Kohen's scanned the screen of the computer. "Doing a study on the relationship between displacement, velocity, and acceleration and how they correlate to each other- in other words, we'll be using a lot of graphs to show the equations we will choose, kind of like explaining what we learned and giving examples" He looked over at Beck, who was doodling in the notebook now. Kohen stared at how gentle of a being Beck looked at that moment.
"Uhm- either or…" Kohen trailed off, tearing his eyes away from Beck. He looked a little grumpy as he did so, though not in a hostile way, just a little confused.
"You can choose" Kohen decided. "And you can make it look pretty," He said, gesturing over to what Beck was drawing.
"We can do it online in a slide show or we could do it on a poster and present it that way" Kohen said, looking around to see if anyone else was doing on via poster board. There were only one or two partners doing that, which meant that the slide show was the most popular.
"But we have time…we have a few days to do this so there's no rush, I just like to get everything done as soon as I can, that way I don't have to worry about it, besides, it's not like it's the most boring thing out there," He said, even though most of his peers thought so.
"And you look tired so we can do whatever right now, you don't have to write anything down today, just, you know, when you can. Like homework" Kohen said, though, he'd never done any homework in his years in high school. Homework was work done at home, so when teachers assigned them "homework" Kohen did them all at school, as fast as he could. He needed the extra time outside of school for work.
Kohen looked over at the teacher who was getting up to help a student in the back of the class. He leaned a little close to Beck.
"If you want, you can take a quick nap and I'll cover you" He whispered, eyes still glued on the teacher who was too busy talking to notice Kohen looking at her.
Kohen looked at Beck and when he realized he was too close he sort of jumped, as if he had startled himself.
"Er- if you want, just an option, nothing wrong with sleeping in class, I do it all the time" He boasted as if that was a good thing. There was a nervous smile on his face now, though he also seemed proud of his words.
