Mila waited patiently, keeping an on Baylee but also allowing her eye to drift around the bar. It was damn packed for a Sunday. People still in their church fine clutching glasses filled with all colors of spiked liquid. It was a bit hilarious. The stage sat empty, the urge to sing tickling the back of her throat. Being an emotional mess was certainly good for singing, she usually got more tips when she was feeling feels. Tonight, Mila just wanted to be right in this chair, swallowing the last dregs of her drink as Baylee came back to her.
"You're smiling." She observed with that same soft teasing note as he leaned into their bubble once more. "Gotta be careful with that. You may stop a heart or two." Like mine.
"It happens from time to time," Baylee said, raising his head up to make eye contact with Berry. They seemed to pass a mental message to each other, making the bartender raise up from the bar and nod towards the door. "I'm gonna take my break now. Mind coming with me?"
Baylee walked around the bar for once instead of jumping over it, heading for the main exit with Mila right behind him. "Just give 'em a Bud Light if they ask for something," he told Berry as he passed by the big man, pushing open the door and holding it open for Mila. Shit, when was the last time he did that? Typically he just rushed out of doors, not really caring what happens to the person behind him. But here he was, holding the dirty ass edge of the door for her.
Night had fallen outside and Mila crossed her arms tightly across her chest. Even within the warm embrace of her jacket that bitter cold still hit like a sledge hammer. "Shiiiiiiiiit." The curse sliding out between her pursed lips, with her large eyes the effect of the face was more than a little funny. A little foul mouthed doll called Mila.
They walked over to the alley between the buildings, the designated 'break' area was apparent from the piles of cigarette butts that littered the ground. Mila leaned against what looked like the cleanest part of the wall, but she really didn't care to think about what could have been coating it. She grinned at Baylee, for once just feeling genuinely happy, nothing else crowded the confines of her mind. "Seems like we're having an eventful week." She commented, running her chilled fingers through her hair and sticking them back in her pocket. With an odd elbow wiggle, Mila invited Baylee to stand on the wall with her.
Baylee accepted the invitation, shuffling over to where she was leaning against the wall, slipping his hands into the leather jacket he never left home without. He would have to buy a new one soon, however, since there was a fairly large hole growing in the center of his back from the 6 years of almost constant use. He would keep it somewhere for sure once he got a new one.
"Probably the craziest week I've ever had," he admitted, letting out a long sigh through his nose. He was exhausted emotionally after the whirlwind of anger, happiness, and sadness that he's been fighting through all day. But there was still one more thing he needs to talk about it. "I….look, I know I've been treating you unfairly. All of this….y'know, flirting and…..it's been a while. And doubled with the fact that I ran out of my meds….." her look of shock made him realize that he forgot to tell her a very important part of himself. "For my depression. I was diagnosed a while back."
"Oh." Mila's whisper was snatched away by the night air, but from the slight twist of Baylee's lips, she knew that he had heard her. Suddenly, a lot of things made sense. His mood swings, the way he kept her at arms length, all of it. Mila had to look away because she was overcome with shame. She had acted like a complete bitch, messing with his life when he was just trying to figure out how to be around her. Jezz…they had a lot to work on.
Because Mila had already decided to make it up to him. She cared for Baylee–probably a lot more than she should–she wasn't about to turn tail because of something like this. He couldn't be healed just because she was around, but she could certainly support him.
Looking back up at Baylee, she wanted to ask him how bad his depression was, but really couldn't figure out how to ask in a way that sounded nice. Mila opted for another question instead. "Your arm…?" The scar she saw the other day, she couldn't get it out of her mind now. Was Baylee truly okay?
"That….that was probably when it was at its worst," he admitted, scratching the back of his neck in what seemed like embarrassment. Which he was. "My mom died a couple days before and I just…..didn't feel like living anymore." A slight voice crack. Probably the most emotion he was willing to show. "I don't cut or anything like that anymore. Grew out of it, I guess, and it stained all of my clothes."
The look on Mila's face was….he honestly didn't know how to read it. He wasn't the type of person who could read complex emotions through expressions.Obviously smiling means good and frowning means bad, but anything else went right over his head. But she did seemed to look…regretful. Like she did something bad and was just now realizing it.
His story was just getting more and more heartbreaking. No wonder he had pulled away from everyone else. Mom and dad both gone, Baylee was alone. Just like Mila was. But he had handled all that pain in a way that it turned physical and he could process it. Mila had just put it behind her–literally.
God weren't they a pair?
"I'm sorry…" She said, shifting a bit closer to him so their jackets brushed every time they moved. "For a lot of things–my behavior, the last crazy couple of days–but mostly because you've been alone…" Trailing off Mila wasn't sure where she was going with her statements. She just wanted to comfort Baylee in the worst way. "What can I do to make it up to you?"
"You don't need to make up anything, búp bê," he said, waving off her concerns even if she had made his week hectic as shit. "You didn't know anything about it and I didn't tell you, so none of it's your fault." Okay, maybe it was, but she was being too hard on herself for it.
"But….." he turned to face her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, gently pulling her into a hug. "If you really want to make it up to me, stay around for a while. Try and fix the mess of….whatever we have going on." I want to make this work. Things were becoming 50 times more clear for him. He just hoped she wanted to stay around.
He–he was asking her to stay. No one had ever done that before. Sure, she had already decided to linger in this town and completely throw Baylee's life out of wack–in a good way–with her presence, but it was so different having him say it. Some silly little part of her almost couldn't believe it.
Mila tilted her head up, meeting Baylee's gaze from within the circle of his arms. Her face was stone cold serious, hiding the well of emotion she was trying to beat back, but Baylee was practically beaming at her. That soft smile, those warm green eyes, he really wanted her to stay. She couldn't help it, her crooked grin appearing as she finally returned his hug. "I wasn't planning on going anywhere, Bay. This place is kinda growing on me."
He smiled. A real, full smile, with all of his teeth showing and the corners of his eyes squeezing together. It had been forever since he'd smiled like that. He hoped her being around made it happen way more often.
"That sounds fuckin' wonderful."
The rest of the night went as smooth as it could've been. Any potential suitor of Mila was scared off by the prospect of getting knocked on their ass by Baylee. It was clear by the attention she was giving the bartender that the advances would've never broken through either way, as well. Even when he had to pause their conversation for him to do his job, her full attention was applied to the young man, a small smile gracing her lips like there was nothing in the world more important to her than Baylee.
After another 4 or 5 hours that felt like 20 minutes, it was time to close shop. The last of the tenants trickled out as Baylee wiped down the bar for the last time, still telling Mila the story of his first car crash. It wasn't a bad one since he just drove into a ditch and broke off his muffler, so he still drove home in the shitty '94 Civic. Sadly. It took him years until he got a new car: the truck he still drove.
"Do you plan on driving your car home, Mila?" Baylee asked as he tossed the dirty rag into the sink and wiped his hands on his jeans.
Mila hopped of her chair and stretched, bending this way and that. She had never noticed how uncomfortable the bar stools were until she had to sit in one for hours on end. But it had been a sacrifice she had been willing to make. It was like a damn had broken in Baylee, he was downright talkative and full of those little smiles. All night they had traded stories and Mila wasn't sure of the last time that she had laughed so much.
"Yep." She said, pulling on her jacket once more. Baylee came around the bar and up to her side as they stepped outside. Berry locked up behind them, looking highly amused at the two of them. "Although, I'm not confident in my ability to find your house." Mila shrugged awkwardly making a face in the direction of her care. "You think I could follow you?"
"If you can keep up," he said with a grin, pulling the keys to his truck out of his pocket and spinning them around his finger.
Mila would've raced him to their respective vehicles, but Berry putting a hand on her shoulder stopped her from taking off. His face was decidedly pleased, in an "I told you so," type of way. "That is what I'm talking about, boss. All it took was for him to open up a bit." Then he gave her a quick side hug as a goodbye before she hustled to her car.
It took them barely 15 minutes to get to his house since they were both speeding basically the entire way. The 15 minutes barely seemed like a minute since they were on the phone the whole time. It was filled by a story told by Mila about the first time she drank legally. It ended just as they entered the home, the air now filled with a comfortable silence.
Baylee kicked off his sneakers and sat down on the right side of the loveseat, pulling the remote out from between the cushions and clicked the TV on. "Anything you wanna watch?"
Mila plopped down on the loveseat next to Baylee, leaving a bit of space between them. She pulled one the blankets over with her as well, carefully putting it over the both of their laps. Humming as she thought, Mila settled comfortably. Damn he was a furnace, it was already cozy underneath the blanket and she could feel exhaustion flowing over her. Mila frowned slightly, she wouldn't be able to stay up long if this kept up.
"I heard that HBO is doing a scary movie marathon this weekend. Maybe we could check that out?" She suggested, on a tiny yawn. Baylee was already flicking through the channels, apparently taking her suggestion as law. They were lucky too, The Shining was just starting.
It was only about a half hour before Mila's eyes grew heavy. She hated giving in, but holy crap all the stress of the past few days was finally catching up to her. Slyly, she used one of the movie's jump scares to slide herself right up to Baylee's side. He didn't seem to notice, his attention was solely on the screen when she peeked up at him from the corner of her eye. Even more slowly, she put her head down on his shoulder. A soft sigh was her cheer of victory.
Baylee noticed that, though, moving his arm to put around her shoulders so Mila was more snug against him. She grinned, but within the next ten minutes she was out.
Baylee managed to finish out the movie without falling asleep. Anytime he watched a movie (which wasn't often), he had to watch it in its entirety or he wouldn't be able to get it out of his head. So, after Jack froze to death and the hotel went up in smoke, Baylee turned the TV off and settled into his spot, leaning into the warmth Mila was giving off in her sleep. Their breathing fell into unison as he slowly drifted of into sleep, his dreams without a nightmare in the first time in forever.
Through the next two months, Baylee and Mila thrived. Their relationship, while stagnated in the weird state it was in, was healthy, both deriving support from it and truly enjoying each other's company. His house slowly began to become decorated, starting with Bill the Cactus that shuffled around the kitchen counters whenever Mila decided it should be moved. Christmas time struck the singer with a fever, the decorations immediately switching to all things Christmas. Pictures of Santa hanging from the wall, tiny Santa hats resting on the coffee tables, and even a throw pillow on his love-seat that read "Ho! Ho! Ho!" Baylee, while not really into it, loved how happy it made Mila to decorate, so he just let it happen.
On Christmas Eve, they both rested on the love-seat, Mila's head resting on his shoulder as they both watched Home Alone, one of the only Christmas movies Baylee actually liked. They had a dinky little Christmas tree in the corner of the living room, loaded up with so many ornaments it was ready to fall over.
Ding. Baylee shifted slightly to pull his phone out from his pocket and read the text from Berry.
"Huh." He passed the phone over to Mila for her to read.
Hey, boss. Me and the family are going out to look at Christmas lights. Wanna come?
Mila had been mentally going over where to put Bill the Cactus next–she still wasn't satisfied with the amount of sunlight he was getting–when Baylee's phone appeared in front of her face. She blinked a few times at it before it registered that Baylee wanted her to read the message.
"Christmas lights?" Mila's head popped up off of his shoulder, her eyes bright with excitement. "I would love to go, are you kidding?!"
The blanket covering them was flipped off as she jumped up, darting into Baylee's room and into the closet where her clothes now hung neatly on one side at the insistence of Baylee. In her excitement, Mila completely forgot to ask if her–roommate? friend? handy, handsome as fuck bartender? Who knew? Not Mila.–if her Baylee even wanted to go. She changed quickly, reappearing in the living room all bundled up. Despite being from the pacific northwest, Mila was a wimp when it came to the cold.
Baylee, of course, was already dressed in what he'd be wearing: his old jacket, a pair of jeans, and a white t-shirt. His socks were already on his feet and his shoes rested right next to the door, so he had no need to stand up from his spot on the couch until Mila walked out. So, when she finally walked out, he had to stand up and stretch, since they'd been watching movies for around 3 hours previously.
"We'll be riding in the flatbed," he said, picking up the blanket from the floor and handing it over to her. He knew she'd be freezing.
There were only 5 or 6 presents under their tree, but neither of them complained. It had been forever since they'd celebrated any sort of Christmas, so the prospect of simply sharing this time with another human being was enough to fill their hearts with joy.
It took Berry about 15 minutes to pull up in his lifted truck. Since the tires on it were massive as well, Baylee had to basically lift Mila up into it and them clamber in by himself. The back window was open so everyone inside of the cab could talk with the two while still enjoying the warmth of the A/C. Mila only had Baylee, but seemed very pleased with the cards she was dealt.
Mila was firmly tucked into the corner of Berry's flatbed, Baylee's blanket, her coat, and under Baylee's arm. To say she was happy was an understatement, the young woman was practically vibrating with excitement and joy. When was the last time she had felt so happy by just existing? Was it weird that life was starting to made an odd amount of sense…three thousand miles from the place she called home?
She pushed the thoughts from her mind…or tried to, Mila kept getting caught on one thought. Thankfully it was one that made her smile, so she decided to share it with Baylee while they were driven down the road towards the neighborhoods with the best light shows. "My Aunt and I used to go see the lights too…She adored the season. She had to have the best lights in the neighborhood–there was a competition–so each year we would make a plan of how we wanted the house too look. We went all out. It was the one thing that never made sense about her…" Mila trailed off, leaning her head back against Baylee's shoulder. It was the most she'd said about her Aunt….ever.
Baylee sat patiently for a few moments after she finished speaking in case she had more to say. When she looked up at him as if to show she was done, it was his turn to tell a story.
"Dad was a lot like that. The moment it would it November, the Christmas decorations would go up and nothing but holiday movies were on the TV. I even caught him watching those damn things in the middle of June, since he had 'em all recorded. The tree would go up the day after Thanksgiving, and he always bought the biggest one. They literally never fit in the house. And even when we got older, he'd dress up as Santa on Christmas Eve and bring us out Christmas PJ's. I even bought some for us, if you're willing to wear 'em."
Typically, telling stories about his dad put Baylee in a deep depression that would only be remedied with a bottle. Yet, surrounded by the season that Bao loved the most, he felt nothing but joy and contentness. The happy smile on his face was bordering on the biggest Mila had ever seen.
"You bought me pjs?" Mila couldn't help the grin that threatened to crack her face. Of course she would wear them. She adored the idea of Christmas themed sleep wear. How had she never thought of it before? Well–Her Aunt had made Christmas Day a posh affair so Mila had dressed to the nines and sipped champagne all night instead of what Baylee had described as his family tradition. She had to admit that his sounded more fun.
When Baylee nodded, obviously a little unsure of her reaction, Mila carefully folded their fingers together. It was the first time that she had tried to hold his hand, but it seemed like a good time to try it out. "Oh hell yea! I'm gonna wear them so much you're going to hate them. But! You have to wear–this!" From seemingly out of nowhere, Mila produced a very obviously Christmas themed beanie. The green and red colors shining bright in the evening light. At Baylee's dubious look, she brought forth another one, smaller and obviously for her.
Baylee snorted, contemplating saying no until Mila gave a mini-rendition of puppy eyes that damn near melted his heart. How the hell could he say no to that? She could get anything she wanted in the world if she just pulled that expression. Including his heart.
"Yeah, sure, whatever," he said, trying to regain any sort of stubbornness as she reached up and pulled the beanie over his head. She misjudged the size of Baylee's head, but he liked the way the hat came completely over his ears. Leather jackets didn't do much for a person's body heat, but they never even reached their ears. So he was content with the hat. And the happy expression on Mila's face positively made his night.
Mila couldn't help it–she giggled. And then the giggle turned into a full belly laugh as she played with the poof on the top of Baylee's head. They were seriously the worst Christmas hats that she could find, and that was exactly why she had bought them. Baylee couldn't even muster up the ability to be annoyed when she laughed like that, instead reaching over to pull on the hat that she had gotten herself–which had blinking lights on it.
There was a moment where they stared at each other and their stupid hats before bursting into more chuckles. Could she kiss him now? Maybe? Mila looked away. No.
"Ey, you two. We're almost there. Leave enough fun for the rest of us, eh?" Berry said over his shoulder. Mila's giggles petered out, but she settled back into Baylee's arm. Her gaze remained on the distance though, on the lights sparkling just around the next corner. She couldn't look at Baylee, a little ashamed that she had thought about kissing him and ruining the night. They had boundaries for a reason. Although the hand holding and cuddling….? Mila couldn't exactly be sure where those fell along that line.
Eventually, they pulled into the rich neighborhood that was frequented by most Christmas light enthusiasts in the area for the flashy colors and impressive set-ups. There were little animations being played over someone's roof, there were huge light shows put to music from a radio station that the people had rented and massive designs that the families paid to be installed.
Baylee was most entertained by Mila, however. The way her face lit up whenever they stopped in front of the next house shone brighter than anything that was on the homes. Unconsciously, he scooted even closer to Mila and gripped her hand a little tighter, not wanting to let go of her for the world.
There was a guy in the passenger seat of the truck that Berry had been talking to basically the entire ride. He was taller than Berry, surprisingly, but was more lanky and thin than Berry was. Baylee had been wondering who he was ever since he climbed into the flatbed, but when he saw they were holding hands, he finally understood.
"Seems like Berry's got a new boyfriend," he mumbled to Mila, quiet enough that she was the only person who heard him.
"Huh?" Mila asked, not really listening. She was entirely distracted by the incredible displays around her. Softly, she had started singing along to the music playing, her voice rising and falling with the notes. It had grabbed the attention of a few people that were walking instead of driving along the street, but she didn't care. Mostly, Mila did it for Baylee. He always got this look on his face whenever she sang, she couldn't really describe it accurately, other than the fact that it had her heart do a little dance in her chest.
Mila blinked as Baylee's words finally sunk in. "Huh?!" She said brilliantly, sitting all the way back down into the flatbed. Her eyes were huge in shock. How the hell had she not noticed?
"Keep your fuckin' voice down," he hissed, although there was less anger and more humor to his voice. "Berry really don't like it when people talk about him without him in the conversation." Baylee was suddenly very cold since a draft slipping in through the hole in the back of his jacket, so he shuffled even closer to Mila and leaned into her. "But yeah, Berry's got a new boyfriend." Then he realized why Mila was so shocked. "Oh. Oh, yeah, Berry's gay. Guess I forgot to tel you."